Her heart pole-vaulted. The wink. The sly smile. She was falling helpless. She considered him as he studied the wine list.
“We’ll have a bottle of the 1999 Chappellet Pritchard Hill Cabernet, and a Kiddie Mai Tai for the young man,” said Brent.
A few minutes later, the sommelier presented the bottle to Brent. “A fine choice, sir,” he said, removing the cork and pouring a splash into Brent’s glass.
“Hey, mister,” said Tyler. “Is that all you’re gonna give him?”
Brent laughed. “He’s letting me taste it to make sure it’s okay.” He swirled his glass, sniffed the wine and took a sip before nodding. The sommelier retreated after filling Brent and Shade’s glasses.
“Let’s make a toast,” said Brent. “Here’s to a wonderful week together with two beautiful people. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be than here with you both. Cheers.”
“Thank you,” said Shade, gazing into his eyes before taking a sip. “I’ve never had red wine before. This is exceptional,” she said, trying to swirl like an aficionado, sending wine sloshing onto the white tablecloth. “Oh my,” she sputtered. “I got a little carried away with the swishing thing.”
“I’m glad you like it,” said Brent, grinning. “Hey, Tyler, how’s your Mai Tai?”
“It’s exceptional,” replied Tyler, sucking the straw and making loud slurping noises. “Can I get another one, please?”
“Just one more, Tyler, and that’s it for the night,” said Shade.
The waitress presented Tyler with crayons and paper while Brent ordered an appetizer. “We’ll start with the Taster Sampler.”
Conversation came easy, as they sampled Keahole Lobster, Kalua Pork Quesadilla, and Ahi Ginger Poke. She glanced at Tyler sitting across from them, looking adorable in his pink bow tie and suspenders. “Hey, honey, what are you drawing?”
“It’s a surprise,” said Tyler, curling his arms protectively. Head down. Tongue rolling around inside his cheek. “Okay, are you ready?” asked Tyler. He revealed his drawing of three stick figures walking hand-in-hand, the smaller of the three in the middle. Palm trees graced the background, and little hearts floated above. “This is us,” said Tyler. “Grandma, Grandpa Brent, and me. Do you like it?”
She blushed, smiling at Brent.
“I love it,” said Brent. “Thank you for drawing it.”
“Yes, thank you, honey. It’s very nice.”
“It’s a present for Brent,” said Tyler. “You can take it home and stick it on your refrigerator.”
“I’ll cherish it always,” said Brent, glancing at Shade. She looked uncomfortable. He reached over and squeezed her hand.
“More wine, sir?” said the sommelier, lifting the bottle from the table.
“I think we’re good for now,” said Brent.
Tyler gulped his second Mai Tai, while they dined on Kula broccoli with macadamia nuts, pan seared Diver Sea Scallops with ginger garlic black-bean sauce and whipped garlic mashed potatoes.
“Do you like your dinner, Tyler?” asked Shade. “Tyler, are you okay?” His eyes were loose, unfocused. He swayed in his seat.
“Yep, Gamma,” he replied, with a twisted smile, before launching into unprovoked laughter.
“What’s so funny?” asked Shade, disturbed.
“Everything’s funny,” he slurred, before his head dropped forward, landing onto his plate.
They rushed to him, lifting his head—mashed potato globs pasted to his face. He smiled crookedly, eyes askew. “I wuv you guys,” he slurred, before slumping forward.
The waiter rushed to their table. “I’m so sorry. The bartender mixed up the orders. I was coming over to give you the right one. The second Mai Tai had alcohol in it.”
“Are you sure only one drink had alcohol?” asked Brent.
“Yes, we’re sure. Let me get the manager,” the waiter replied.
“I’m so sorry about what happened,” said the manager moments later. “There was a mix-up.”
“That’s inexcusable,” said Brent, as Shade wiped Tyler’s face.
“Please accept our apologies. Is there anything I can do, sir?”
“You need to be more careful,” Brent said, while Shade attended to Tyler.
Brent carried Tyler to the car, Tyler’s hands draped around Brent’s neck.
“I’m glad you suggested we call the doctor,” said Shade, on the drive home. “It was reassuring. I’ll keep an eye on him.”
Brent was quiet, lost in thought. He reached over and touched her knee, his hand lingered.
He carried Tyler into the hotel room. Shade sat him on the edge of the bed and undressed him while Brent supported his listing body. Tyler wore a steady smile, his head bobbing. Once in his pajamas, Shade tucked him into bed and scrutinized him, kissing his forehead and stroking his hair. “Poor little guy.”
“I’m so sorry, Shade,” said Brent, wounded. “I suggested the Mai Tai.”
“It’s not your fault. He’ll be okay. I just hope he doesn’t wake up with a hangover. There’s nothing more we can do. Do you want to sit out on the lanai? Maybe we can finish the wine.” The manager had corked their bottle and provided another, gratis.
“Sure. I’d like that.” Brent poured two glasses.
They stepped out onto the balcony and settled into the lounge chairs. “I’m sure he’ll be raring to go in the morning.” He raised his glass. “To paradise,” he said, clinking glasses. “It’s been nice, being here with you both.” He took a sip, then turned toward her. “We’ve spent a lot of time together, but I don’t know much about you—your life—Tyler. I’d like to know more, if you’re comfortable.”
She breathed deep, caressing the stem of her wineglass. She looked into his eyes and held them for a minute before answering. “I’ve had a complicated life,” she said, turning and staring into the night. She sipped her wine. Started and stopped. Then spoke. “I was an orphan, abandoned by my mother and left hanging in a box under a tree.” She laughed nervously. “That’s how I got the name, Shade. Because the shade of the tree kept me from baking in the sun.”
“I lived in three foster homes. At fifteen, I fell for a guy and got pregnant. When he found out, he ran. My foster parents didn’t know what to do, so they took me to a home for unwed mothers. We went to church every Sunday, and that’s how I met my husband, Stanley. He was much older, but he wanted to marry me despite my condition. And he adopted my daughter, Adeline. When Addy turned sixteen, she fell in with the wrong crowd and ran away with a guy named Scott and eventually became pregnant with Tyler. Scott died in an accident when Tyler was a baby. He never knew his father,” said Shade, struggling to find the right words. “Adeline hooked up with another guy, Jaime, and she and Tyler lived with him. My husband died five years ago. A heart attack. A year later, Adeline and Jaime were murdered. They never found the killer.”
She swallowed hard, staring at the wineglass pressed between her fingers. There was more, but she had said enough. Too much shame. “So, that’s my life. I got custody of Tyler, and now it’s just the two of us. He’s the only family I have.”
Brent let out a long sigh as he studied her face. He felt helpless. Words escaped him. He reached over and took her hand. His thumb brushing her delicate fingers.
“Did you have a good marriage?” he asked.
“Yes, it seemed to be a good marriage.” She stopped short, changing the subject. “So, tell me about you. Your life.” She felt deceptive asking what she already knew. But she sensed he wanted to talk—to lay everything out in the open.
He took a swallow of wine and withdrew his hand from hers. “I was married to a beautiful woman, Kendra. We met in college. In California. We got married after we graduated. We spent our honeymoon here, in Hawaii. Her family lived in Michigan, so we moved there. I was working as a Major League Baseball scout. The position required a lot of travel, so when Kendra got pregnant, I looked for a job that would keep me close to home. That’s when I became the Athletic Director for
Edelweiss Schools. When our son, Luke, was born, we were thrilled.” Brent hesitated, running his finger around the edge of the wineglass. He stared ahead, jaw clenching. Unclenching.
She waited, studying his profile, the muscle pulsing above his jawline. He looked exposed, and she wanted to draw nearer to him. Her heart thundered in her chest.
“When Luke turned two, Kendra got pregnant again. We were elated. She was five months along when she took Luke and drove to the supermarket. A guy ran a red light. They were broadsided. Both killed,” he said, his breaths long. “That was five years ago.”
She was breathing hard. Her shoulders tight. She studied his eyes, shiny with tears. “Oh, Brent, I am so sorry.”
“We’ve had a lot of tragedy in our lives,” said Brent, picking up the bottle. “Why don’t we kill this wine? Things are getting gloomy out here.”
“Sure,” she said, brushing a tear from her face. “I’ll go check on Tyler.”
She returned to the lanai and found Brent leaning against the balcony rail, wineglass in hand. She grabbed her glass and joined him, their forearms touching, as they gazed into the night. He placed his glass on the table and turned, facing her. He removed the glass from her hand and set it aside. Their eyes locked. He moved closer, pulling her into him, his lips touched hers. Gently at first, then deeper. Desperate. An intense hunger unleashed. He drank from her mouth as though dying of thirst.
Her legs felt as though they could no longer hold her, her body dissolving into his. She ran her fingers through his hair, pulling him closer. He pressed her against the wall, his lips brushed her neck—her shoulder. His hands moved over her. Everywhere.
She had never felt like this. And she didn’t want him to stop. Her hands pulled him closer, feeling the strength of his back. Tears coursed, as all emotion gushed out. He pulled back, his hands framing her face. He stared into her, wiping the wetness with his thumbs.
“What’s wrong?” he breathed, concern in his eyes.
“I don’t know,” she said. “I’ve never …,” she stopped and breathed in, biting her lip. “I don’t know.”
He pulled her close to him, tucking her head into the crook of his neck, his arms wrapped around her, stroking her hair. “Shade, you make me crazy. I’ve wanted you for so long. It feels right. Here. With you.” She clung to him, tears stained his shirt.
“Hey,” he said, holding her at arms-length, searching her face. “I would never do anything you didn’t want. Maybe things went too fast. I’m sorry.”
“Oh, Brent,” she sighed, staring into him. “It’s just that ….”
“Hello, is anybody here?” Tyler slurred, sitting up in bed, swaying back and forth. “Can I get another Mai Tai?”
Shade and Brent drew back from one another and went to him.
“How are you feeling, honey?” asked Shade, running her fingers through his hair.
“Great,” he replied, smiling. “Brent, are you sleeping over?”
“No, buddy,” said Brent, smiling. “I’m leaving now. I have to get up early to catch my flight. Can I have a hug goodbye?”
Tyler flung himself at Brent, his arms wrapped around him. “I love you, Brent,” he garbled, before falling over backwards. He was asleep.
A mist formed in Brent’s eyes. He pulled the cover over him, tucking it around his neck, and kissed his forehead. “Well,” Brent sighed, “I should leave.”
She walked him to the door.
“I’ll see you in Michigan,” he said, as he ran his finger over her lips, his eyes holding hers. “Do you want me to pick you up from the airport?”
“No, but thank you. Mary’s coming with Scone and Leah.”
“Call me when you get in?”
“I will. And thank you for everything. You don’t know how much I appreciate what you’ve done—for me and for Tyler.” She reached up and took his face in her hands, pressing her lips against his—lingering.
His arms encircled her. His tongue moved between her lips. He pulled away. “I need to leave.” He kissed her forehead before opening the door and walking out.
Shade leaned against the door. Undone. She could taste him, still wet on her mouth. Her chin burning from the stubble of his whiskers. She wanted him. Desperately. She needed a shower, but she didn’t want to wash away his scent. Not tonight.
She pulled on her nightgown and slipped under the covers, droplets wetting her face and pillow. Her protective barrier had been shattered. Why did I let it go this far? Dear God, I know you will not let me be tempted beyond what I can bear. Please God. Help me find a way out. She lay awake for hours before sleep took hold.
Shade got up early and went out to the lanai with her coffee and daily reading. She prayed for a safe trip for Brent and wondered if he was thinking about her. She tried concentrating, but her mind kept traveling back to last night, longing for him to be with her.
“My head hurts,” said Tyler, stepping out onto the lanai, hair disheveled, eyes squinting against the sun. He went to Shade and crawled into her lap, wrapping his arms around her neck. “Where’s Brent?”
She embraced him, kissing his cheek. “I’ll get you some Tylenol. Brent had to leave this morning. He went back to Michigan.”
“Why didn’t he say good-bye?”
“He did. In fact, he tucked you into bed and kissed you goodnight.”
“I don’t remember. Can Brent live with us when we get back to Michigan?”
“No, honey. He has his own home, but you can still see him.”
“Grandma, I’m gonna pray Brent will come live with us and be my grandpa.”
She squeezed him tight, rubbing his back. “It’s good to pray. God doesn’t always give us what we want, but he gives us what we need.”
“Do you ever wish my mom was alive? And she could live with us?”
“Always, honey. Every day.” She pulled in her emotions. “But I’m thankful I have you. You’re my special gift from God. Hey, what do you want to do on our last day?”
“Can we go shopping? I wanna get a present for Leah and Mary.”
“Yes. I was planning on that. Anything else?”
“Maybe go swimming?”
“You got it, buddy. Let’s get a move on.”
“Mind if I join you?” said Mindy, spotting Shade in a lounge chair. Kevin and Evangeline helped Hanna into the pool as Tyler swam to greet them.
“Please do,” replied Shade. “When do you go home?”
“Day after tomorrow,” Mindy replied. “It was such a beautiful wedding and Chad seems so happy. It sounds like you’ve known Sally for some time. We’re happy to have her in our family.”
“Sally is a wonderful person. I don’t know what I would do without her.”
“We haven’t spent much time with her, but hopefully that will change now that they’re married. We were hoping to spend more time with Brent, but it sounds like he was busy with you and Tyler. Did you have a good time together?”
She felt uneasy talking about him. Was she fishing? “Yes, we did. He’s so good with Tyler, and Tyler adores him.”
“He loves children, so that’s not surprising,” said Mindy. “Does Tyler live with you?”
“Yes. My daughter, Tyler’s mother, passed away.” She paused. “Adeline was a single mom, so I have custody of Tyler.”
“Oh, Shade. I’m so sorry,” Mindy said, touching her hand. She didn’t pry. “It must have been hard for you. Do you know about Brent’s family? The accident?”
“Yes, he told me,” said Shade, stopping for a minute to slow the conversation. “I can’t imagine what he must have gone through.”
“It was unbearable. He’s my baby brother, so I worry about him. He was such a free spirit when he was young. Into sports. Incredibly adventurous. Wanted to travel the world, climb mountains and jump out of airplanes. But when he met Kendra, he became more responsible. More settled. And when Luke was born, his world was complete—until that day when everything changed. He became withdrawn. Introspective. Like
someone had sucked the life out of him. There wasn’t anything we could do to help him. I always hoped he would meet someone, but he doesn’t seem interested. He dates, but it always ends the same—one or two dates and he’s done. He told me no one could replace what he’d lost.”
Mindy sighed. “It’s been five years since I’ve seen him this content. I see the old Brent coming back to life, and it makes me so happy. But I worry he could get hurt again. I guess what I’m trying to say is he seems to have feelings for you. I’m not sure what your intentions are. And it’s none of my business, but please don’t hurt him.” Mindy rubbed Shade’s arm, tears brimming in her eyes. She was visibly shaken. “I love him so much. He’s such a good man.”
Shade put her hand over Mindy’s. She couldn’t swallow. The lump in her throat fixed. “I think the world of Brent. And so does Tyler. I only want what’s best for all of us. It’s in God’s hands.”
“Hey,” she smiled, still touching Shade’s arm. “Would you like to join us for dinner tonight? We’re eating here at the resort. We’d love to have you.”
“I’d like that. Thank you.” She was conflicted, but didn’t want to appear impolite.
Shade was eager to get home—to settle things with Brent. She had let it go too far.
Chapter Twenty-One
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:18
Scone leapt at Tyler, licking his face, his tail spinning like a ceiling fan. “I missed you so much, Scone,” said Tyler, nuzzling his face into Scone’s neck.
Mary and Shade embraced before loading the luggage into the car. “Did you have a nice time?” asked Mary, when they were settled in the front seat.
Tyler yelled out from the back seat. “Brent was there, and we spent a lot of time with him.”
“Oh?” said Mary, her eyebrows elevating.
“You’ll never believe this, but Brent is Chad’s uncle,” said Shade. “When we saw him at the resort, I almost fell over in shock. We had a wonderful time. The wedding was beautiful, Hawaii is stunning, and Brent took us sightseeing. He’d been there before, so he knew where to go.”
The Essence of Shade Page 18