What Bae Won't Do Saga

by Genesis Woods

  “I already know what you were going to say: I’m just as dirty as you are, right? Especially since we started fucking while JaNair and I were together.” He walked over to me. “I don’t get it. What’s your beef with JaNair? Y’all are family. It’s like you take pride in taking her men. Why is that, Mya? Are you that jealous of your own cousin that you’ll do any and everything just to make her look bad?”

  Wait a second! A few minutes ago, he was acting so sleepy. Now this nigga wanted to be wide awake giving lectures and shit.

  When he started handing me my things, I had to say something.

  “So what? You’re Dr. Phil now?” was the only response I could come up with.

  Who the hell was he to be questioning me about my motives anyway? If memory serves me correct, he knocked on my door in the middle of the night. So why was it okay for him to do JaNair wrong, but not me?

  To keep it real, he did have me thinking, though. What would JaNair do if she ever found out I’ve fucked damn near every one of her boyfriends, including Jerome?

  I laughed. Not a damn thing, I said to myself.

  JaNair wasn’t about that life. At the most, she’d kick me out. I’d be okay with that, though, and that’s only because I knew I had a few places that I could go. Niecey’s door is always open for me, and even though I just called this nigga by someone else’s name, he’d welcome me in to.

  “Look, Ryan, I’m sorry about earlier, the whole calling you by someone else’s name and shit.” I was now standing between his legs fully dressed. I just remembered I’d asked him for a few dollars earlier, so I needed to play nice.

  “Why don’t you let me top you off before I leave, babe, just to show you how sorry I really am?”

  When he didn’t say anything in response, I took that as the green light to handle my business. I started to get down on my knees but was stopped when he pulled me up by my shoulders.

  “I’m good, Mya. Just lock the bottom lock on your way out,” he simply said.

  What the fuck! Did this nigga just dismiss me like that?

  His ass was really in his feelings right now. I laughed. If he didn’t want me here anymore, that’s cool. I’ll leave, but not before he gave me the money I asked for.

  I played as if I didn’t hear what he said and tried to kiss him on his lips. He turned his head just before I was close enough, and I ended up kissing his cheek instead.

  “OK, Ryan, I’ma go, but can I still get that money you said you’d give me?” Shit! You thought I wasn’t going to ask? I need those couple of dollars since they finally fired me from my job.

  I heard him smack his lips. “Bitch, you got me fucked up. You better go ask that nigga Jerome for that bread.” He turned away from me and buried his face in his pillow. “Since there’s nothing else we need to discuss, you can get the hell out of my house now. Don’t forget to lock my door when you leave either.”

  I stood there shocked for a minute, but then quickly got over it.

  I grabbed the rest of my things that were scattered around his room and finally headed to the door. Before I left, though, I threw a whole bag of flour all over his new suede couches. I even emptied the whole bowl of used grease I found on his stove.

  Yeah, fat meat is greasy, and so are his couches too. I may have walked up out of here empty-handed, but I’m sure getting them muthafuckas cleaned will put a dent in his pockets.

  Jerome

  “So, let me get this straight. While JaNair was laid up in the hospital, possibly damn near death, you were in your office fucking her cousin?”

  I lowered my head in shame. Gerald always had a way of making me feel worse about a situation than what it was.

  “Now that G said it like that, it does sound kind of fucked up, dude,”

  Toby added as he took another swig of his beer.

  I ran my hand down my face. “Man, it’s not like I wanted that to happen. It just did.” I looked over at my boys and noticed the smirks they both had on their faces.

  “Nigga, tell that shit to someone who doesn’t know your black ass.”

  Toby laughed. “For real, Rome, the way you two were staring at each other when y’all were at the bar, I thought you’d take her down right there.”

  “Aye, don’t get me wrong, Mya is fine as hell, and I was low-key checking her out, but that was it.”

  “See, that’s your problem right there. You already knew what time it was when she answered the door in lingerie and invited you in for a bite to eat. For a girl like Mya, checking her out only gave her the green light to think that it was okay for her to approach you on some fucking shit. You already know she doesn’t care that you and her cousin are together.”

  “She had something for him to eat all right!” Toby laughed as he went to the fridge and grabbed another round of beers.

  “Man, Toby, shut your corny white ass up.”

  “My ass may be white, but it’s far from corny, dude. I bet I could pull JaNair.”

  The whole room went silent. Gerald and I looked at each other, then returned our focus back on Toby.

  “Nigga, please!” we both shouted at the same time, which caused all of us to start laughing.

  We were chilling in G’s backyard, just shooting the shit and catching up with each other. I had a date later on with JaNair, so I just stopped by to get up with my boys.

  Gerald had just got through telling us about the trip he had planned for him and his lady when my phone started to go off back to back.

  “Yo, who is that calling you so much?” Toby asked as he responded to a text that just came through on his phone that had him smiling.

  “Shit, I don’t know. It’s an unknown number, and you know I don’t answer those.”

  My phone rang about five more times before whoever was calling stopped. Two minutes later, my phone started going off again, but this time with text messages.

  Unknown: Jerome, I know you see me calling you. Pick up the phone!

  Unknown: So you’re still going to act like you don’t see me calling you!

  Unknown: I bet if I was JaNair you’d answer this muthafucka!

  After reading the last text message, I had a pretty good idea of who it was that was now hitting me up. Bitch is crazy I thought as I deleted the texts. I don’t know whose number Mya was calling me from this time. It didn’t even matter really. That shit was going right on the blocked list just like the rest of them.

  “Damn, man, who’s got you over there frowning like that now? Unique tripping again?”

  “Naw, I haven’t heard from her in a few days. This is Mya’s crazy ass calling and texting me from another number.”

  “Wait, before you even go in on her again, I’m still trying to understand how you and Unique never ran into each other at the hospital,” Gerald said.

  “That would be all in thanks to me,” Toby quipped putting his arm around my shoulder. “The night the accident happened, she was there. It just so happened that I saw her first and ran a little interference before she saw him,” Toby answered, pointing at me.

  Gerald shook his head. “I don’t see why you haven’t told JaNair about your son anyway. You had him before you got with her. Plus, it’s not like you and Unique are still together or anything.”

  I looked away. Unique and I weren’t together, but we had slipped up a few times and had sex. Nothing recent, but it’s been within the last few months.

  “Nigga, don’t tell me you still fucking with Unique too?” Gerald shook his head again. “I don’t understand you, Rome. Why string both of these women along like that?”

  “Man, it’s not even as bad as you’re saying. When I met JaNair, I wasn’t really trying to be in no relationship because of the situation Unique and I had going on. But after being around her so much and getting to know her more, my feelings started to change. Plus, she’s a good girl, and she’s trying to add to our future, not just take away like most of these bitches. And to be real with you, Unique and I haven’t messed around in a min
ute. She wants way more child support than I think she needs, so she ain’t fucking with me like that anymore.”

  “Dude, you need to get your shit together on both ends. You wanna bitch about ole boy JaNair lives next door to being all in her face every chance he gets, yet you’re making it easier and easier for him to take her away,” Toby added.

  I just waved his ass off. Toby’s white ass was always trying to be on some self-righteous shit, when not so long ago, we were two of a kind.

  Something he said though kind of had me feeling some type of way.

  “You’re making it easier and easier!” That’s the same shit Semaj’s ass whispered to me the day I found him at JaNair’s house damn near naked. I wanted to knock that little smirk off of his face, but JaNair walked into the room.

  I looked up at my boys, then down at my phone which was ringing once again, this time with Unique’s name flashing across the screen.

  Maybe I am making it easy, I thought to myself as I took another sip of my beer and sent her to voice mail. I need to change some shit before it’s too late.

  ShaNiece

  I stood in my bathroom staring at my reflection in the floor-length mirror. I couldn’t help but to smile at the way my new moisturizer had my almond-colored skin glowing and feeling so smooth.

  The earth tone makeup I had just applied to my face made my dark cocoa-brown eyes pop, while the Dynasty at Dusk Crèmesheen by MAC had my lips looking full and juicy.

  The breath I’d been holding for the last two minutes finally decided to come out. I don’t know why I was so nervous.

  I looked at the tropical print cami and cuffed denim shorts I picked up from Forever 21 today. The way my shapely body filled out this outfit, I’m pretty sure my date would appreciate the thirty dollars I spent on it.

  “Shit!” I said to myself when I saw what time it was. I had about thirty minutes before Toby would be here to pick me up for our date.

  Since that night at the lounge, we’ve been talking on the phone and texting a lot. At first, I was tripping a little because I’ve never talked to a white boy in my life, let alone dated one. But there was something about Toby that had me ready to explore these uncharted territories.

  Bang! Bang! Bang!

  “Damn, Niecey, you’ve been in there for an hour already! Hurry the hell up, I gotta pee!”

  I rolled my eyes and continued to get ready. LaLa had been a real pain in my ass since we found out that she was pregnant. If she wasn’t eating up all of the food in the house, she was stretching my clothes out trying to stuff her fat ass in them. And don’t let Mama be home. It’s like ten times worse. She can’t do shit for herself.

  My mind drifted over to Li’l Ray for a moment. I felt kind of sorry for him. LaLa was really making him go through it from the late-night grocery store trip to the constant mood swings. One minute they’re laughing and having fun, the next minute she’s kicking him out and telling him that the baby isn’t his. Mama told her that she needed to stop saying that shit to him because one day, he might just take her word for it and never come back.

  “C’mon, Niecey! Damn! I’m about to pee on myself!” she screamed from the other side of the door.

  After taking one last look at myself in the mirror, I opened the door and came face-to-face with a heavier version of myself.

  “About damn time!” LaLa snapped as she ran past me and plopped down on the toilet.

  “Do you really need that bowl of ice cream and pickles in there with you?”

  She rolled her eyes as she scooped a big spoonful of the nasty mixture into her mouth.

  “Mmmmm. You should try it, twin. I bet you’ll like it,” she said, offering me a scoop.

  I shook my head and left her there to handle her business. As soon as I entered my bedroom, the Joe and Kelly Rowland ringtone I gave to Toby was going off. “There’s a difference between love and sex . . . But can I have both of them with you?”

  A big Kool-Aid smile crossed my face as I thought about the reason behind me giving him this ringtone.

  “Have you ever been in love before?”

  “Once or twice. You?”

  I thought about my on-again, off-again relationship with Big Will. “Yes.”

  Toby laughed. “You had to think about that question for a minute?”

  “No, not really. Well, yes . . . a little.”

  He laughed again. “Which one is it, ShaNiece? No, not really, or yes?”

  “It’s yes, damn it! And why do you keep on laughing at me?”

  “Because you’re so cute.”

  I blushed.

  “Hello!”

  “Yeah, I’m still here,” I said still blushing.

  “I thought you hung up on me for laughing at you.” I laughed. “Can I ask you something? I don’t want you to get offended though when I ask you this.”

  “Naw, you good. Go ahead.”

  “OK. Well, do you know the difference between love and sex?”

  I wasn’t offended by his question. However, I was a little caught off guard. I thought he was about to ask me about my last boyfriend or something.

  “Uh . . . yeah.”

  “Care to elaborate?”

  I sat there and thought about his question for a minute, then answered. “Well, with sex, you can have that with anybody. Love, on the other hand, it takes a special somebody to have you feeling that way.”

  He got so quiet that I had to look at the screen on my phone just to make sure the call had not dropped.

  “Hello!” It was my turn now.

  “Yeah, I’m here.”

  “You OK?”

  “Yeah, I’m good. I just never heard anyone answer that question with such simplicity. I like the way you put that.”

  We sat there quiet, lost in our own thoughts for a minute before I said thanks.

  “You know what else I like?” he asked.

  “What else do you like, Mr. Wright?”

  He simply said, “You.”

  My phone ringing in my hand again snapped me from my thoughts. When I looked down at the screen and saw Will’s name flash across this time, I frowned.

  “Ewwww. Who’s got your face all screwed up like that?” LaLa asked from behind me.

  I didn’t even hear her walk up behind me, nor did I even respond to her ass. I looked out of my bedroom window and saw my sexy piece of white chocolate already waiting for me in his car.

  I grabbed my purse and keys, slipped on my wedged sandals, and headed toward the front. As soon as I swung the door open, Toby was already standing there getting ready to knock.

  “Damn,” escaped his lips as he inspected my body from head to toe.

  “Hey!”

  “My bad. Hey, beautiful!” he said kissing me on my cheek. The touch of his lips to my skin had the hairs on the back of my neck standing straight up. A tingly feeling shot through my body which caused goose bumps to appear on my arms.

  “I called your phone a few times, but you never answered. You ready to go?”

  I nodded my head, and he smiled. Lacing his fingers with mine, he led me to his car, and we were on our way.

  LaNiece

  I watched Niecey as she and her knockoff Justin Timberlake drove off. I wasn’t hating or anything, but I really didn’t know what it was that she was seeing in him. Yeah, he was nice looking, in a boy band type of way. You could tell he had a nice body underneath the fitted white V-neck shirt he had on. The Ralph Lauren tweed vest and matching fedora that he was rocking showed that he had a little bit of swag. But other than that, what else could it be?

  I rubbed my big-ass belly as I walked back into the living room. That Cookies and Cream Ice Cream with a side of butter pickles was not agreeing with me or my baby right now. Another trip to the bathroom was definitely going to happen soon.

  I was flipping through the channels on TV trying to find something to watch when I stumbled upon an episode of Maury Povich. As always, the question of some poor baby’s paternity was in question
.

  “Anika, how sure are you that Treyvon is the father of your child?” Maury asked.

  The little ghetto bird started to smack her lips and roll her neck. “I’m 1,000 percent sure, Maury. Treyvon is the only (beep) I was sleeping with at the time that I got pregnant.”

  “Are you sure there’s no other possible men who can be the father of your eighteen-month-old daughter Tarshay?”

  “Uh-uh, uh-uh, Maury. There is no one else.”

  “OK, well, let’s find out.”

  The crowd went wild as Maury stood up and walked over to the staff member who had the results. As soon as he sat back down and started to open up the envelope, it got so quiet that you could hear a rat piss on a cotton ball.

  “In the case of eighteen-month-old Tarshay . . . Treyvon! . . . You are . . . not the father!”

  The look of sheer horror was etched on this girl’s face after Maury read the results. She shouldn’t have been mad at anyone else but her damn self. She knew before she even brought her ass up there that there was a possibility that Treyvon was not the baby’s father.

  I shook my head. “These bitches is dumb.” I looked down at my protruding belly. “At least I know your daddy can be one of three,” I said as I patted the spot where my baby just kicked.

  I was flipping through the channels again when my text message notification ding started to go off.

  Jay: Hey, girlie, how are you and my god baby doing?

  I wonder how fast that title will change once she finds out I might be carrying her stepchild.

  Me: We’re doing fine. My stomach is just hurting a little. Jay: Do you need to go to the doctor?

  Me: No.

  Jay: Ice cream and pickles?

  Me: Yes. LOL!

  I couldn’t help but to smile at how well JaNair knew me. I know whenever the truth comes out about what Jerome and I did, our friendship will be over.

  Jay: Let’s do lunch or something this week. I have some juice.

  Me: OK, just let me know . . .

  I placed my phone back into my bra and got up from the couch. I wonder what type of juice her ass had to tell.