“That doesn’t sound so bad.”
“What did you expect?”
“I don’t know. I figured I was going to be dragged on some rigorous hike where it was going to become obvious to everyone how out of shape I was.”
“It’s a six mile hike one way, so your fears might still come true,” Sadie joked.
“Oh, well, that’s just great,” Jasper said and smiled.
Once they set out, Brent and Sadie walked ahead of them. It was obvious that Emma had invited him there to get to know Sadie, and it looked like they were getting along well. Even so, Jasper had to ask why she didn’t tell him that she dated her supposed brother figure.
“So you dated that guy?” Jasper asked.
“Yeah, for a little while. He wasn’t right for me, though. I figured it would be better not to mention that after you reacted kind of weird to me inviting a guy. The truth is I was hoping to set him up with Sadie.”
“Sorry for reacting that way, but you’ve got to admit you’ve dated some really athletic guys. You’ve even dated a few musicians through the years. Then there’s me. I’m just average compared to your normal guy.”
“Like you have any room to talk. You dated eleven different girls during high school, and every one of them seemed perfect to me.”
“Trust me when I say they weren’t perfect, but how do you know how many people I dated?”
“I pretty much Facebook stalked you for four years. What I’m trying to say is sometimes I feel like the plain girl compared to them, too. You obviously don’t think of it that way, though, so what makes you think I do?”
“I guess you’re right. I don’t understand how you think you’re the plain girl out of the people I’ve dated, though.”
“And I don’t understand how you think you’re not better than Brent. You’re just as good-looking as him, and you’re not boring at all. You get me. The only thing he has on you is height, and to be honest, I don’t really care about that. You’re average height. I’m not into giants.”
“Really? What are you into then?”
“Guys who are willing to go on a six mile hike with me, even though this isn’t really their thing. It doesn’t hurt if they have the best smile I’ve ever seen either. Honestly, my dream guy looks a lot like you.”
“So we’re just similar, huh? I’m not literally him.”
“There are a couple details missing, but I might be willing to overlook that.”
“So what are these details?”
“You’re not actually going to make me point out your flaws, are you?”
“I don’t see why not. I’m a big boy. I can take it.”
“Okay, I don’t like that it’s so easy to make you jealous. It makes me think you might have a confidence problem when it comes to relationships. The other thing is how you never clean up anything.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m clearly the most confident guy you’ve ever met, and those messes aren’t mine. I don’t know how they get there,” Jasper teased.
“Sure. What about me? I know you have at least one or two things you would change about me if you could.”
“Nope. I’m not falling into that trap.”
“Come on. Every girl wants honesty. Just tell me.”
“You’re wrong. Every girl says she wants honesty. When you give it to her, she gets pretty angry about it. What girls really want is to be told how pretty they are, no matter how they look, and to always be appreciated for everything they are and aren’t.”
“Well, it’s a good thing I’m not every girl then. I’m curious. What could I improve on?”
“Are you sure you want to go down this road?”
“I’m positive.”
“All right, but remember you asked. First of all, you wear way too many clothes in the house. Just once, I would like to come home to find you half naked. It works for me in my boxers, so I figure it should work for you, too.”
“Very funny, but I’m being serious. Even if I don’t act like it, the truth is I have no idea what guys really want. I’m looking for a little constructive criticism.”
“I can give you that. First, you wear too much makeup around your eyes. You don’t need it. You’re already beautiful, and doing too much takes away from what you already are. Secondly, I hear you talk about your dad a lot, and I get it. He’s a really important person to you. He gave you a house, for crying out loud! I get why you love him, but sometimes I wonder if I could ever compare. I can’t give you houses, cars, or pretty much any type of possession at the moment, but I could love you more than any other man. I just don’t know if that’s enough. Finally, you apparently stalked me on Facebook for four years. That’s a little creepy,” Jasper joked.
“I’ll definitely lighten up on the eye makeup if it makes me look better. I don’t apologize for stalking you, though. I’m pretty sure you did the same to me. As for my dad, I can kind of see where you’re coming from. He was everything to me when I was little, and that’s why we’re still so close now. I don’t love him because of what he gives me, though, and I’m not trying to get a boyfriend who can give me a lot of material things. I love him because him caring about me isn’t conditional on anything. He loves me at my worst. That’s what I want out of the man I end up with. At that point, he’ll be the most special person in my life.”
“Good to know. You should know by now that me caring about you isn’t conditional on anything, but I’ll prove it over time. As for me being a little insecure, you won’t have to worry about that anymore. It was kind of dumb for me to be jealous of Brent anyway. I mean, look at me,” Jasper joked.
“All right, don’t get cocky now. Although, this is one of the things I like about you.”
“What?”
“You don’t take much seriously, and that’s normally not a good thing, but you make me smile like no one else. Don’t ever change that part of yourself. Let me ask you something. What first attracted you to me? I remember when we were fourteen, and I wasn’t the one who had a crush on you first. How long did you like me?”
“Since we were six and I kissed you. I didn’t really get it back then, but I knew you were going to be the girl I came back to again and again. Paul had a crush on you for a little while, too.”
“Your brother?”
“Yeah. It shouldn’t be surprising. You’re a pretty girl.”
“I just didn’t think I was his type.”
“When he got older, you weren’t. Paul goes for the more . . . um how can I say this?”
“Slutty girls, right?” Emma asked.
“I was going to say it in a nicer way, but yeah.”
“I don’t know how you two are twins. You couldn’t be more opposite. Paul’s pretty much your evil twin,” Emma joked.
“I don’t know about that. My parents didn’t want me to come to Hawaii because they figured I was expecting too much from you. Paul was the only one who said go for it. He told me I would regret it if I didn’t give it a shot. He’s a little rough around the edges, but Paul’s secretly a romantic, even if he would never admit it.”
“So maybe I’ve got it wrong. You might just be the evil twin. I’m going to have to watch out for you,” Emma flirted.
“I would, if I were you,” he said and wrapped his arms around her. Then he kissed her neck.
“All right, save it for at home,” Emma said and grinned.
“Oh, so something’s happening when we get home?” Jasper asked with a smirk.
“That’s not what I meant. I just . . .”
“Hey, I’m taking a twelve mile hike today just to be with the girl I care about. I think maybe I deserve some type of reward when we get back.”
“I was right. You are the evil one,” Emma teased and pushed him away.
They caught back up to Sadie and Brent and made their way to the beach where they ate some of the best food Jasper had tasted. Apparently, Sadie could cook really well. Once they were finished eating, Emma and Brent hit
the water. Meanwhile, Sadie took some time to catch up with Jasper.
“So what do you think? My plan for you getting Emma didn’t exactly work out, but it looks like you two are together now,” she said.
“I don’t think we’re anything official, but it’s great. I didn’t believe we would ever get to this point after what happened.”
“Yeah, me either. The thought of being out with an unfamiliar guy still scares me. Emma’s taking this much better than I did.”
“Brent seems nice enough. Are you interested in getting back out there? I mean, I guess we’ll have to end our fake relationship now, but I’m okay with you breaking up with me if you’re happy,” Jasper joked.
“I’m not sold on him just yet. He’s nice enough, and he’s not bad on the eyes, but something’s still missing. I’ll give him a shot, though. Who knows? He might not like me. I’ve been out of the game for a while now, and this all feels really awkward to me.”
“There’s no reason he wouldn’t like you. Trust me on that. If I hadn’t been in love with Emma when we met, I would’ve jumped at the chance to date you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. You’re pretty, funny, and easy to talk to. You can’t ask for more than that. Have confidence. Speaking of awkwardness, though, I’m not really sure how to approach everything with Emma. Care to give me some advice?”
“Yeah, but what do you mean?”
“Well, we went on our first date in years last night, and it was great. Now we’re doing whatever this is. I’m interpreting it as something very similar to a double date. What are the rules between us? We live together, and we know everything about each other. Should I wait until we go on eight dates to take this seriously, or should I start treating it that way now?”
“Are you going to feel any differently or know more about each other after that?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Then treat it like it is. You’ve known each other your whole lives. There’s no need to pretend like you’re still in the getting to know each other stage.”
“What if Emma wants it that way?”
“She might think she does, but trust me on this. Sometimes a girl can be scared to take that leap, especially when she’s been through what Emma has. You’ve got to be the one to take the first step. Go slowly, but treat her like what she is.”
“And what is that exactly? We haven’t really defined what we are.”
“Jasper, if you don’t know what she is, then I can’t help you.”
“Why? I don’t get it.”
“You moved away from everyone you knew for this girl. She’s your childhood friend, first love, and roommate all rolled into one. If that’s not someone you can be madly in love with, then I don’t know who is. You might not call her your girlfriend right now, but that’s fine. The bond you two share is much stronger than that. When you took on Chip, I knew that. She did, too.”
“Okay. Thanks again, Sadie. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
“It’s obvious that you would be completely hopeless if I weren’t here, but I’m glad I could help you. I’ll let you pay me back when I find a guy I’m serious about. I’m pretty sure I’ll need some advice from an inside source eventually.”
“You’ve got it. Now, why don’t we join our dates?”
They swam in the ocean for a while and then packed up to hike back. On the way, Brent set up a date with Sadie, and Jasper and Emma simply walked hand in hand. It had been a tiring but good day. The real surprise was yet to come, though. That was a night that changed everything about Jasper and Emma’s relationship.
Chapter 10
The First Time
When Jasper and Emma finally got back home, they were both exhausted. It was Friday, which meant they would normally be going out, but after such a long hike, they just didn’t have it in them.
“Well, what did you think? Today wasn’t so bad, was it?” Emma asked.
“It was perfect, if you don’t count all the walking, which was most of the trip,” Jasper joked.
“I didn’t know I was with such a lazy guy. I’ll have to keep that in mind.”
“Hey, I’m not lazy when it comes to everything.”
“Oh, really? Please, enlighten me then because I haven’t seen the active side of you yet, and we’ve known each other since we were little kids.”
“I guess I could show you what type of activity I really like,” Jasper said as he stood and moved toward her.
“I don’t know if . . .” Emma managed to say before he playfully pushed her down to the couch.
“Are you sure you don’t know?” Jasper asked with a smile.
“Just shut up, and show me exactly what you were going to do.”
Jasper got on top of Emma and kissed her. Then he moved down her body with soft kisses until he got to her stomach. At that moment, she pulled him back up to her.
“What’s wrong?” Jasper asked.
“I don’t know. We’ve known each other forever, and I should be fine with taking things further, but I don’t think I am. Is that okay?”
“Of course. If we ever do take things further, I want it to be because you want to do this, too. I’m sorry about moving a little too fast. I just really like you. I actually love you.”
“I love you, too. There are so many reasons for us not to take things further right now, but I’ll admit a part of me wants to,” Emma said as he got off her.
“What do you mean? What could possibly be wrong with me and you being as close as two people can be?”
“First of all, it sounds kind of lame, but I was raised traditionally. I’m technically not supposed to be with a guy until I marry him.”
“Oh, well, that would be a problem then. If you really don’t want to . . .”
“No . . . well, kind of . . . I don’t know. If I found someone I knew would be there until things like marriage were an option, I wouldn’t hesitate, but how can you ever know something like that? You might really think someone was going to be the one you needed, but that doesn’t make it so.”
“I think I can solve that problem right now. Emma Grey, will you do me the honor of being my wife in the very distant future?” Jasper joked.
“Very funny, but I know you’re not serious. I might be freaked out if you were. We’re eighteen, and that’s too young to know who you’re going to be with.”
“Maybe not. I mean, I knew I loved you when I was a kid, and people told me I didn’t know what love was yet. They said my feelings would change. They never did, though. I can’t see how they would change over the next few years. What else is holding you back, though?”
“What happened a few weeks ago. I mean, I don’t remember much of it. As a matter of fact, I barely remember anything. I’m not as traumatized as I think I should be. I shouldn’t even be thinking about sex for a long time, but yet I am. I almost didn’t stop you. It’s as if Chip never happened, and something about that seems very wrong to me.”
“Why? How do you want to feel about it?”
“I don’t know. I just don’t see how this hasn’t affected me more.”
“Because you’re strong. Look, I think the way you’ve reacted to all of this has been incredible. You could go through years of therapy and trust no one, or you could do what you’re doing. That affected you in a lot of ways, but you’re still moving on. You have friends, me, and nothing has changed with your family. You’re still Emma. You love, laugh, and get angry the same way. What’s so bad about that, and what’s wrong with thinking about loving someone who would never hurt you in any way?”
“Maybe you’re right. It hasn’t even been two months, though. I just thought it would take longer until I could think about things like this.”
“I get it. If you need time, I’ve got a lifetime, so no rush. Is there anything else that’s holding you back?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Don’t you worry about embarrassment and awkwardness?”
“What would be embarrass
ing?”
“We’ve never seen each other naked, and what if things don’t go according to plan? I have no idea what I’m doing in that area, and I doubt you do either.”
“That’s the best part, though. We would learn everything together. As for seeing each other naked, I’ve got nothing to be ashamed of, and I know you don’t either. This is a lot simpler than you think.”
“So you’re not afraid at all?”
“Are you joking? I’m terrified. It’s a good kind of fear, though. I’m scared I’ll do something wrong or it’ll change how we look at each other, but I’m also hopeful that’ll be just one more thing I’ve gotten to experience with you.”
“You’re making this really hard to say no. It’s not fair to poke holes in all my arguments, you know,” Emma teased.
“Hey, I’m not trying to convince you to do anything you don’t want to. Just know that if you ever want to end up in my bed, it won’t be a mistake. I’m in whatever this is for the long haul. If we end up being together forever, that’s amazing, but if not, I’m still going to be a lifetime friend. I’m not just some guy who’s going to walk out of your life right after you give your heart away. Anyway, I should go wash up,” Jasper said and kissed her cheek before walking away.
Emma sat there on the couch thinking about everything he had said. Was she overthinking this? Sure, her parents and church would be disappointed to know she was sleeping with a guy, but it was her life, and Jasper would never hurt her. He was in this until the end. She knew that for sure. Then there was what happened with Chip. Most girls wouldn’t have even been able to think about sex this soon, but the truth was Emma didn’t remember much from that night. It emotionally scarred her, but those scars weren’t so deep that she couldn’t picture herself with Jasper. Love and passion were still very real for her. One experience hadn’t changed that.
Emma reacted without even thinking. She walked into the bathroom and found Jasper rinsing his face. She wrapped her arms around him from behind and kissed his neck. When he turned around, Emma said something that would completely change the dynamic of their relationship.
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