“OK,” he said, bracing himself. “Get it over with. This is the part where you guys tell me what an asshole I am. Go for it. I’m ready.”
“Nah,” Connor said. He put an oak log into the woodstove, prodding it with a poker until it nested in the coals. “You got it wrong. This is the part where we calmly discuss our options.”
Seth gulped whiskey and wiped his mouth. “I told her everything, get it? Lazar’s onto me. If we follow the pistol now, it’ll be into a trap.”
“Based on the fact that the killer tracked you down tonight?”
Seth was startled by Davy’s skeptical tone. “It’s the only thing that makes sense.”
“Not necessarily,” Sean said. “Maybe you slipped up. You’re not superhuman. Maybe there’s something you don’t know.”
“There are three possibilities,” Connor said. “One, she never planted the chip at all, and told Lazar everything from the beginning. Two, she planted it, Lazar discovered it and is onto the two of you. Three, she planted the chip, Lazar doesn’t know, and the ski masks aren’t Lazar’s. I personally don’t favor number one. Why would he attack her if she were collaborating with him? It doesn’t jive with what I know of her personally, either.”
“What do you know about her personally?” Seth said bitterly.
Connor raised an eyebrow. “I enjoy the distinct advantage of not being in love with her, so trust me, my judgment is way better than yours. Why would she call a hit man to whack you right after you saved her life? Come on, Seth.”
Seth shook his head. “There was no other way that guy—”
“Shut up and listen for once,” Connor said curtly. “I don’t like number two, either. Victor’s not the type to show his hand by sending an incompetent goon to attack her. He’s the type to rub his hands together and wait until you fall into his trap.”
“The second guy was not an incompetent goon,” Seth said. He touched his bandaged side with a grimace. “He almost got me.”
“Yeah, the second guy worries me,” Connor said. “Which brings us to number three. The ski masks are Novak’s, not Lazar’s. We know that he wants her. And he’ll go to any lengths to get what he wants.”
Seth buried his face in his hands. “She’s in on it,” he repeated stubbornly. “There’s no other way the guy could have found us. And her boot had an X-Ray Specs beacon in it. I sold that shit to Lazar.”
“So?” Davy said. “You dusted her stuff too, right? Maybe he just thinks that she belongs to him, like you do.”
“And he tagged her because he wanted to keep an eye on her, like you did,” Sean added. “‘Cause he’s a paranoid control freak.”
“Like you are,” Connor and Davy finished in unison. They grinned and gave each other a high five.
Seth grunted. “Don’t expect me to have a sense of humor tonight.”
“You don’t have a sense of humor at all,” Sean observed. “Why won’t you even consider the possibility that she’s not lying to you?”
Whiskey and exhaustion let the truth just fall out of him. “I can’t afford to consider it. I want it too much.”
“Ah. So what you’re saying is, you’re chickenshit,” Sean said.
Seth was too tired and depressed to react. “Better to err on the side of being a suspicious bastard. I’ll live longer.”
“Yeah, maybe. But your life won’t be worth a damn.”
Seth didn’t even bother to glare at him. “It doesn’t matter,” he said dully. “Whether she did, whether she didn’t, she stays in that room until this is over. I’m following the gun alone. I accept the consequences of what I’ve done, but that doesn’t mean you guys have to.”
Davy sloshed some more whiskey into his glass. “Don’t be a melodramatic asshole, Mackey. It’s not up to you what we decide to do.”
Seth stared down into the deep amber color of the liquor. “You guys don’t have to risk your lives because of some misplaced loyalty to Jesse. He’s gone. He doesn’t need you anymore.”
“No, but you do,” Connor said. He leaned over and poked Seth in the shoulder. “It’s not just for Jesse. It’s for you. Don’t ask me why. You’re a pain in the ass, and we still need to have that talk about your social skills, but there it is. I’m in this for you, buddy.”
Seth choked on the liquor he was swallowing. Coughing to clear his burning throat made his bandaged side sting like hell. “Hey, I appreciate the sentiment, but at this point, I don’t even care if it’s a trap, see? I just want to end it. Fold my hand and get out of the game. I can’t take the responsibility, and I don’t want your help.”
“Tough shit,” Davy said.
“Count me in,” Sean piped up.
“Me, too,” Connor said, lifting his glass with a grin.
Davy scowled at him. “Not you, pal. You’re still hobbling around on a cane. You’re not going anywhere. You get guard duty.”
“Like hell.”
“No,” Davy said, in a big brother voice. “I’ll tie you down.”
“Let’s play a hand of poker on it,” Connor wheedled.
“Yeah, and you’ll cheat, you slick bastard. Non-negotiable, so just forget it…”
The conversation degenerated quickly into an energetic fraternal squabble. Seth tuned out the familiar cadences and stared into the fire. The fire of the whiskey warmed him, fuzzing his brain around the edges, and he struggled to follow his own train of thought. Only an idiot with a death wish would follow a transmitter to an unknown destination, to face an unknown number of adversaries with unknown resources. Truth was, he had never meant to involve the McClouds in the actual takedown. He had always intended for that phase to be his own private party.
He broke into the middle of the argument, which had gotten to the shouting stage. “Let me finish this my own way, guys. That way, if it goes to shit, they can’t link me to you.”
His words reverberated in the sudden stillness.
“Yeah, right,” Connor said slowly. “And what are we supposed to do with Blondie? Keep her in the attic like Rapunzel?”
“Oh, God.” Seth closed his eyes and rubbed them. “I don’t have the faintest idea. What a fuck-up. God. I’m sorry, guys.”
The fire crackled and spat for a few minutes. “I know why you brought her here,” Connor said quietly. “And you did the right thing.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah. You brought her here to keep her safe.”
Seth shook his head. It was not a negation. “I’m an idiot.”
“You aren’t the first, and you won’t be the last,” Davy said.
“I were you, I’d go up to the attic and spend some quality time with your lady,” Connor said. “She’s in a bad way. And you could use some rest yourself. You look like shit. We’ve got the Cherokee gassed up and loaded and ready to roll. The Specs are set up and keyed to the Corazon transmitter. The three of us will take turns watching tonight. If it starts to move, we’ll call you. We can leave on a minute’s notice.”
“Yeah. Chill,” Sean urged. “We need you fresh and snappy when it starts to move. Here, I made a sandwich. Take this on up to her.”
“It won’t be long,” Connor said. “Things are starting to move.”
“The circle is getting smaller,” Seth said.
The McClouds looked at him. “Huh?” Sean said.
Seth shrugged. “Just something Jesse said to me in a dream,” he mumbled. He looked around himself. Three pairs of similar green eyes regarded him with varying combinations of worry and annoyance.
He hadn’t seen that look on anybody’s face since Jesse’s death. He hadn’t thought he would ever see it again.
He grabbed the whiskey bottle and raised it, in a silent salute to brotherhood. He grabbed Raine’s sandwich and headed up the stairs.
Chapter 24
Raine jumped to her feet when she heard the lock rattle, wrapping the blanket around herself. She was shaking, but not with fear. She had left fear so far behind she didn’t even remember what it fel
t like.
Seth let himself in, dropping the heavy, palm-sized padlock on top of the dresser. He laid a plate next to it, with something wrapped in a napkin. She was relieved to see that his wound was dressed. The white bandage showed up starkly against his golden skin. A threadbare red flannel shirt hung open over his bloodstained jeans. He held an open bottle of whiskey by the neck. He took a deep swallow.
“You’re drunk,” she said.
His eyes glittered, with a wild, faraway look. “Medication,” he said, pointing to the bandage. “This hurts. I brought you a sandwich, if you’re hungry.”
“You have got to be kidding.”
“Suit yourself.” He took another swig.
She pulled the blanket tighter. “Are you going to give me some clothes?” She made her voice sharp and businesslike.
He set the bottle on the dresser next to the padlock and advanced upon her slowly. “I don’t see the point,” he said. He seized the corner of the blanket and jerked it down, frowning when he saw the nightgown. “That thing is still wet, Raine. You’ll make yourself sick. Take it off. The room’s warm now. Too warm.”
“I don’t want to be naked with you.”
It was the wrong thing to say. She knew it as soon as it left her mouth and saw the hot flash in his eyes.
“Tough,” he said. He jerked the thin straps down, his hands lingering on her skin as he shoved the nightgown over her hips. It felt to the floor around her muddy, scratched feet. She forced herself not to flinch back, or cover herself. She straightened up and composed her face. Let him look. She could still be dignified, even if she was naked.
He studied her body with greedy, minute attention to detail. A dull flush was burned deep into his high cheekbones, and his hands scalded her as they clasped her waist and slid up over her ribs. His fingers explored her carefully, as if he were memorizing her.
Despite his unstable mood and the whiskey on his breath, she was absolutely unafraid of him. She placed the back of her hand against his cheek. “You’re feverish,” she said quietly.
“Tell me about it. Every time I look at you.”
“You should take an aspirin, or some—”
“What a joke,” he cut her off, as if she hadn’t spoken. “The first time I lose my mind for a woman, and it has to play out like this.”
She pressed her hands against his burning forehead, trying to cool him down. “You know that I would never do anything to hurt you,” she murmured.
“Shhh. We’re not going to discuss it.”
“But Seth, we have to—”
He put his finger over her lips. “No, we don’t. Off limits. Don’t want to go there.”
She’d crashed into this stone wall before, but it didn’t intimidate her anymore. Not now that she had seen what was on the other side; his gentleness, his enormous capacity for tenderness. She slid her hands under his shirt and around his waist, careful not to touch the bandage.
He jerked back and stiffened. His hands fell away from her. “What the hell are you doing?” he snarled.
“Getting warm. You won’t give me any clothes, and I’m cold.”
He held himself rigid. “Not a good idea. I’m not in control of myself tonight. At all. Don’t push me, Raine.”
She pressed her cheek against his burning chest, rubbed it gently against his flat brown nipple. “I know you,” she said, in a soft, stubborn voice. “You can’t scare me, Seth Mackey.”
“Oh yeah?” His arms closed around her, his heat scorching her. “Well, you scare me, babe. You scare me to death.”
She pulled him closer and twined herself around him. His response was instantaneous, and she almost wept with relief when she felt the familiar flare of heat from him. She needed all of his devouring hunger, all of his volcanic heat to drive away the bleak horror of what she had seen tonight. She caressed the hot length of his erection and unbuckled his jeans, wrapping her fingers around his hard, fever-hot penis.
It all moved very fast from that point. He toppled her onto the futon, pinning her against the tangle of blankets, his boots still on, his jeans shoved down. She stared at the ceiling, wide open, and cried out when he shoved himself inside her. It was too soon; she wasn’t soft or wet enough, but she didn’t care, she needed this to melt the glacial cold. To make her feel alive again.
It only hurt for the first few rough, awkward thrusts. His breath was harsh and ragged against her neck. His muscles clenched, fighting for control. He drew himself out slowly, surged in again. Already she was softening; he glided more easily with every deep stroke. She twined her legs around his damp, muddy jeans.
His face was a taut grimace of pain. “You’re killing me, Raine.”
“No.” She pulled his face back down to hers. “I’m loving you.”
He wrenched away from her kiss. “I want to believe you,” he rasped.
She caressed his face, her body pulsing seductively beneath his. The pain in his voice tore at her. “Trust me,” she whispered.
He froze, wedged deep inside her. Time stopped. Everything stopped. The two of them were clenched together as tightly as a fist. She held her breath, staring into his eyes.
His mouth hardened. He shook his head and pulled out of her body. “Roll over.”
“No!” She tried to pull him back. “At least look me in the face while we make love. You owe me that much.”
“It’s not love, and I don’t owe you a damn thing.”
He flipped her onto her stomach. She turned her face to the side and shut her eyes against the intense feeling of vulnerability, the heat of his hands caressing her bottom, his thighs wedged between hers. He shoved her open, his weight settling down on her, and penetrated her, pushing himself slowly, deeply into her body.
“Damn you,” he muttered under his breath.
He pushed away the hair that covered her face and pressed his face against her neck. He stayed that way, vibrating with tension. She pried her arm out from beneath her chest with some difficulty, and grasped one of his big, trembling fists that gripped the blanket by her head. She pulled it to her face and kissed it.
A shudder jerked through him. He lifted his weight off, curving himself over her. Warming and sheltering her. He slid his hand beneath her hips, his long, sensitive fingers seeking until he found her tender cleft. He caressed her slick, swollen clitoris with delicate skill.
“You see?” she whispered, pushing back to take in more of him. “It is love, Seth. It’s always like this with us. It always will be. We can’t hurt each other. It’s against our nature.”
“Shhh. Hold still.” His fingers tightened around her hand. “I’m right on the edge. I don’t want to come yet. Don’t move.”
Raine waited for him for as long as she could, but the wild woman inside her wanted to drive him over the edge and force him to face the truth about the two of them. She arched her back and slid up and down his hard, pulsing shaft, clenching and releasing. She pleasured herself with his body, hungry and bold. Demanding everything he had to give.
Helplessly, he followed her, giving her the rhythm she wanted. He couldn’t deny her what she needed for one second, or even try to resist the force that moved them. He was hers, all hers. Fierce joy blazed through her as she pulled him after her, his wrenching explosion of pleasure echoing her own. His body jerked and pulsed into hers, and his cry sounded like a shout of protest
After several breathless, panting minutes, Seth sat up and started yanking at the laces of his boots. He pulled them off, peeled off his jeans and flung them away too. He lay back down behind her, pulling her close so that her whole back was pressed against his hot chest. His penis, still hard, prodded her buttocks. She gasped as he thrust himself slowly back inside her. His arm clamped across her waist.
“Go to sleep,” he said. “I want to stay right here. Inside you.”
She clutched the thick muscles of his forearm and almost laughed at the ridiculous idea. As if she could sleep in that condition, so utterly penetrated by his body. T
hen she felt the liquid heat trickling down her thigh, and tingled with shock. “Seth. We didn’t use anything.”
His teeth sank delicately into her shoulder, dragging across her damp skin. “No. The condoms are back at the hotel. Want to go ask the McClouds if we can raid their stash?”
“No,” she whispered.
“I didn’t think you’d be into that.”
Raine dug her nails into his arm as his teeth and tongue moved their delicate, nibbling caresses to the back of her neck. “It’s amazing, without,” he said, in a wondering voice. “I can feel every juicy little detail. I want to explode the second I’m inside you. And I thought I had all this self-control.” His hips pulsed against her bottom and he swelled inside her, sliding in and out. “I could fuck you all night long, no problem. I haven’t done it without latex since I was fourteen. Congratulations. You’ve reduced me to a state of adolescent idiocy.”
She clenched herself around him, dazed by the risk they were taking, and all that it implied. “You’ll never forgive me for that, will you?”
“Not in this lifetime.”
“Seth, I—”
“Shhh. No more talk.”
The flat, hard tone in his voice silenced her. She swallowed down the lump in her throat and squeezed her eyes shut. At least he was touching her with passionate tenderness. His body knew the truth. She felt it in the way his hands caressed her belly, her breasts, the way his fingers fluttered skillfully between her legs while he surged heavily into her from behind in a slow, relentless cadence.
That went on forever, timeless and lazy and delicious, but finally he began to deepen his strokes, his breath sawing harshly into his mouth against her neck. He muttered something incoherent and jerked her up onto her hands and knees.
That was even better; now she could move, arching and straining against him. She cried out with unbearable excitement at his first deep thrust, and he froze into immobility.
Behind Closed Doors (The Mccloud Series Book 1) Page 36