I couldn’t wait to feel the air fly past us as we speed down the street. The air was cold as it flew over our heads, but Gunner’s heat would keep me warm.
I watched as he walked out of the clubhouse without a look in my direction. My heart speeds up as I made my way out the back door. I was going to have to walk around the building to meet him.
My feet picked up speed as soon as the door closed behind me. Excitement flowed through me like the trees in the wind, rough and exhilarating.
Gunner was straddling his bike while he waited and watched my every move. This trip seemed monumental. Like a step in our future and I couldn’t wait.
I wanted to be his old lady like I wanted my next breath. Reaching Gunner, I grabbed his offered hand and slowly climbed onto the back of his bike. It wasn’t the first time I’ve done this, but it was my first doing it with someone I l…. no, it was too soon for the four-letter word.
The bike started, and we were off. The winds pulled at my hair that wasn’t under my helmet, and the air bit into my flesh through my clothes.
I lost track of time, but it felt like we’d been on the road for hours. I closed my eyes as the scenery was nothing but a blur. I thought about what it would feel like to have Gunner bend me over this very bike and fuck me hard.
Then, we started to slow down, so I opened my eyes. I lifted my head and looked around. We stopped at a gas station, one I’ve never seen before.
“Where are we?” I ask him in concern.
He slowly climbed off his bike and looked at me as he removed his helmet
“Don’t worry about it darlin’,” he tells me then gave me a hard kiss.
I should have pressed harder, but I trusted this man, and I would soon regret it.
Chapter 14
Gunner
Present Day.
I fucked up bad. I pulled into the clubhouse and came face to face with both Ryan and Reyes.
“Why the fuck didn’t you call me,” Reyes snapped.
“I got the intel and got the fuck out of there,” I replied.
“They got Reyes old lady,” Ryan shouts.
Turning my attention to Reyes who was staring over my shoulder at a very angry Cassie, I shifted slightly to cover his view of her.
“They’re working with the cartel,” I tell Reyes.
“They took Alanna,” Reyes tells me coldly.
If I had stayed, I would have been able to keep her safe.
“There are a few still loyal to the patch,” I tell him trying to put him at ease.
“You should have been there,” Ryan tells me.
He’s right, neither of them told me to come back. Ryan was my VP and Reyes was my president.
“Who the fuck is this?” Reyes’ cold voice turned even colder.
“I’m Cassie,” she tells my prez in a low and terrified voice.
“Don’t speak to her like that,” I tell Reyes.
His dark stare returned to me, and I felt both fear and respect for the man.
“You left your post for pussy?” Ryan snapped.
“Don’t fucking speak about her like that brother,” I tell him darkly.
“She your old lady?” Reyes asks quietly.
“Yes,” I tell him without any hesitation as Cassie shouted a no.
“At least you didn’t jump ship for pussy,” Ryan growled.
Anger had my fist clenching. I wanted to lay the bastard out for talking about her like that.
“Get her inside now,” Reyes’ cold voice was like a whip.
“Let’s go,” I tell her gently.
I grabbed her hand that was clenched into a fist and pulled her into the clubhouse fully intending to take her to my room for safe keeping.
“I don’t understand what’s going on Gunner,” Cassie asks. Her voice was filled with loathing.
“Shit’s about to get nasty, and I needed to keep you safe,” I tell her honestly. No point in lying.
“I hate you,” she tells me.
Those three words were like a stab in the gut. You knew Cassie would, a voice whispered. Didn’t make it hurt any less.
Chapter 15
Cassie
Present Day.
He lied to me and stole me from my home then locked me in his clubhouse. This whole time he was using me.
What hurt the most was that I had fallen for a man who thought of me as a means to an end. I looked around the room that I was escorted to and saw the blank walls and black comforter covered bed. It was stark like the man I thought I knew.
Walking to the black dresser, I searched through its contents. No boxers, just white socks, and handcuffs? My eyes widened as I took in the restrictive devices. Handcuffs and a blindfold. Why did that excite me?
Did I even know this man? I fell in love with a stranger. The fake man that I fell in love with didn’t exist. Tears filled my eyes, and I tried to blink them back, but a few slipped down my cheeks.
What was my fate?
Chapter 16
Gunner
Present Day.
I was regulated to bitch duty, watching the front while they went through the back. I couldn’t stop myself from replaying the look on Cassie’s face as it all came to a head.
I wanted to tell her that it was true. She was more than a job. She wasn’t even a part of the job, but the words didn’t leave my mouth. Like a fool, I just escorted her to my room and dropped her off like she was a burden.
You told Cassie it was to keep her safe, a little voice whispered.
Something in me died as she uttered the words I hate you. I should have told Cassie right there and then she was everything that I wanted in an old lady. I promised myself that I wasn’t going to let her go.
The party raged on, and the unsuspecting Grimm Brothers lived the good life for a few more minutes. I watched as Reyes carried Alanna to his truck holding her close and keeping her safe.
I felt like a fucking asshole for my part in this. If I had only waited a few more hours, I would have been able to take Alanna out of there.
And Cassie would have been left behind, the voice whispered, you wouldn’t have left her behind.
It was right, I would never have left her behind.
I watched the front begging for something to take my mind off Cassie and all the ways I fucked up. To my relief, the front door burst open and one of the brothers slipped out.
Sal was trying to run for his bike. Laughing, I grabbed him by the back of his shirt. I placed my gun against the back of his neck, and I smiled as he froze.
“Hey Sal,” I said with a humorous laugh.
I pulled the zip ties from my back pocket with my free hand. It was already in the shape of a loop making containing Sal easier.
“Where’s my daughter?” Sal growls.
Slipping them over his hands, I pulled the cord hard with my left hand securing his wrists. I then took him over to the van and pushed him through the back doors.
“Safe,” I tell him darkly.
“What the fuck did you do to her,” his tone turned pleading.
“Fucked her Sal, over and over again,” I tell him crudely.
Are you really talking about Cassie like this? The voice whispered.
Shame burned at my gut. Cassie was more than that.
Chapter 17
Cassie
Present Day.
Something was wrong, I could feel it. The way Gunner was looking at me, or more accurately not looking at me, was suspicious. He kept his eyes everywhere else but in my direction.
Reyes, the club president, came storming in the building looking anything but friendly. Not that I blamed him, I was on his turf, and it seems unwelcome.
Apparently, Gunner brought me here without the club’s permission. I sighed and watched as the men disappeared into another room.
I was left to my own devices and considered getting a drink from the bar. Although, there was no one here covering the bar. Who was working the bar at home?
Another question
plagued me. What did Gunner mean when he said about keeping me safe?
Reyes came out of the room after what felt like hours with blood coating him and my fears returned. Who was he torturing in there?
Then Gunner came out, and his eyes met mine. I could see regret, sorrow, pain, and my heart lodged deep in my throat. I felt this foreboding sink in my gut.
“I’m sorry, Cassie,” Gunner whispered when he drew closer.
My mouth was dry as I asked him, “for what?”
Gunner glanced at the bar and saw Reyes pouring a shot of what looked like top-shelf whiskey. After downing his drink, Reyes stood up and glanced down at his feet.
I studied them both and was trying to figure out what was going on?
“He had to be put down. He put all of our lives on the line,” I heard Gunner’s voice, and his words started to sink in. But he couldn’t, no, it couldn’t be true. Gunner wouldn’t have done what I think he did.
They didn’t just kill my father. Did they?
“Tell me this is a sick joke! Tell me you didn’t use me, so you could kill my father!” Oh, please god tell me Gunner didn’t.
Cassie,” he whispers my name.
“NO!” I scream. The chair that I sat on came crashing down, hitting the floor with a bang.
“You toyed with me, pretended to care about me, so you could kill my father?” Oh god, this was happening. I was the downfall of my own father. I killed him.
My hands were clean, but I could see the blood that stained them as if I did it. My eyes watered as pain sunk its black claws into my heart.
“I care about you,” Gunner tells me, trying to pull me close to his body.
For a weak moment, I almost let him. I almost leaned into him allowing him to hold me close, but I remembered everything and no matter what, I will never forget.
“Don’t fucking touch me!” I snapped at him pulling further away from his reach.
“Cassie, your dad was in deep with the cartel. He would have gotten us all killed, including you,” Gunner tried to justify what he did.
“I fucking loathe you!” I whispered.
The pain was overwhelming. It was all too much.
“Do you know what they would have done to you? Once they got past us?” Gunner growled as he grabbed my arm and pulled me closer.
I didn’t want to hear it. My eyes went to the floor as my mind spun. Images of how they could have killed my father kept appearing in my mind.
“They would have taken you alive. Every man that wanted you would have their way with you over and over until they grew tired of you. Then they would have sold you off to whatever fucking brothel they owned,” Gunner tells me harshly, his voice cold and insistent.
I felt the lash of his freezing temperatures.
“I can’t forgive you, I can’t forgive me,” I whispered. My hands clenched into fists and my nails sunk into the flesh of my palms.
“Look at me,” Gunner commanded.
I refused and kept my eyes cast down. How could I move past this? How could I forget my part in what happened here?
“Fucking look at me!” he demanded.
My eyes rose to his. My teeth bit into my tongue as I fought the need to scream in his face. Fighting back all the hate and pain that I was feeling.
“Your dad did this, do you hear me, baby? He did this without any thought of the consequences,” Gunner tells me as his voice quiets.
The pain started to sink in, and denial was rearing its ugly head. The world was spinning as if nothing had changed, as if my life hadn’t been rocked by this loss.
“How could you do this to me?” I ask Gunner. I needed to know how he could live with himself.
“You made me want you, made me crave you, and then I let you destroy me,” I whispered.
I let Gunner take it all from me, and I did it with open arms.
Chapter 18
Cassie
Present Day.
I had drunk myself into a stupor, and my tongue felt like I had glued cotton balls to it. My head felt like the Seven Dwarfs had set up shop and were heading off to work.
‘Heigh ho heigh ho, it’s off to work we go’ would sing on a never-ending loop. The pain that I felt two days ago came back in a fiery blast. It burned through me.
“Talk to me baby,” Gunner whispered.
Opening my eyes, I looked at Gunner. He was sitting in a chair close to the headboard. Gunner leaned over his arms and went on his knees and invaded my personal space.
“Fuck off,” I tell him.
“Cassie, we need to talk,” he tells me quietly.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” I growl.
“The fuck there isn’t,” he snaps.
“Temper, temper,” I snark.
“Cassie,” he warns.
“Gunner,” I spat.
“I know your upset…” he starts, but I cut him off.
“Upset? Stepping on my toe upsets me, eating all the ice cream upsets me, using all the hot water upsets me, killing my father pisses me off!” I tell him, screaming the last part. It also crushed me, but I left that part out.
“It doesn’t matter anyway, I’m leaving,” I tell him as I try to sit up.
“You’re not going anywhere,” he tells me while he puts a hand on my shoulder and forces me to lay back down.
“Keep your hands the fuck off me,” I growl.
“Where are you going to go? Back to the other chapter? Not happening baby, it’s me or no one,” he tells me.
“Fuck you, Gunner!” I cry.
Grabbing my head, I whimper. All of this shouting and thinking had my head throbbing in an extremely painful way.
“Anywhere but here,” I say quietly as the wind drifts out of my sails.
“Got any money?” he asks.
The bastard knew I didn’t. The little money I got from bartending at the clubhouse I have donated to charities. I told Gunner everything. I always told him the truth, he was the one who lied.
“No,” I whisper.
I was ashamed. I was twenty-two years old, an orphan, and broke.
“Thirty days,” Gunner says.
I looked at him and gave him a blank stare. What the fuck was he talking about.
“Thirty days by my side. Thirty days as my old lady and then I will let you go with all the money you need to start over again,” he offers.
I looked at Gunner and glared deep into his eyes. I waited for the rest of the conditions because I knew he always had something else to add. The prick.
“You will need to be my old lady, nothing half-assed. My old lady or no deal,” Gunner drops the other shoe.
“In your bed? Fucking you? The man who killed my father?” I asked him while I reminded him of what he did, “I won’t fuck you.”
“I didn’t kill him, Cassie,” he tells me. His voice was filled with honesty.
“Why should I believe you? You’ve been lying to me since the moment I met you,” I tell him.
“I never lied to you Cassie,” he tells me gently.
I eyed him skeptically. Was I supposed to believe him? A small part of me knew he was honest, but the bitter, hateful part didn’t want to believe him.
“Cass, please,” he begged me.
“Don’t call me that! I’m not your darlin’, your baby, and I’m not your Cass! My name is Cassie,” I tell him coldly.
I needed that money to make my escape, so I guess I needed him.
“Who did you let live?” I asked him.
I wasn’t going back, but that didn’t change the fact I needed to know.
“Zane, Topher, and a few others,” he tells me. His voice was devoid of any emotion.
He was shutting down, and I was to blame. I didn’t feel bad, not even a little.
“Thirty days?” I ask him.
“Yes, but you need to be my old lady, Cassie,” he makes sure that I understand.
“I’ll be your old lady for thirty days, Gunner. Then I’m gone,” I tell him.
“But it starts now,” I inform him.
This time I succeeded at sitting up. I made sure I was clothed and then climbed from the bed. I ran to the bathroom as vomit rose up my throat, and I didn’t bother holding it back.
Did I even drink last night?
“Are you okay?” Gunner’s concerned voice came from right behind me.
“How much did I drink?” I asked him.
“Cassie, you haven’t touched alcohol, not once since I’ve met you,” he tells me.
Was I really that lost in my grief? If I didn’t drink, then why did I feel like the world was coming up through my throat?
“Alanna’s here. She brought you some clothes,” Gunner informs me with concern in his voice.
“The woman that my father took?” I asked in surprise.
My father took her, and she was now helping me?
“You’re innocent in all of this, darlin’,” he tells me gently.
“I’m not your, darlin’!” I snapped.
Even if the words had my heart flipping, I wanted my heart to get the damn memo! He isn’t ours, and we don’t want him.
Then why do you get a thrill at the idea of being his? The little voice asked.
Fuck you voice! I snap at it. Shit, I was losing it. I was losing my mind.
Chapter 19
Cassie
Day One Twenty-Nine to Go.
I was trying to keep my head held high, my back straight and my face devoid of any emotion. My eyes were red-rimmed from all the crying that I have done over the past few days. My face was pale from the lack of light and fresh air. I was now truly alone in this world.
I felt a hole open up inside of me ripping me open and prying my ribs apart. My father was gone, truly gone, and I was left here in a world I knew so well yet didn’t know at all.
The pain was a new constant in my life. It tore into me like a tornado ripping through a house. It was as if the tornado ripped my insides out and put it all in a vortex above me. I wished for the peace that often occurred after destruction, as well as the silence it left behind.
I inadvertently killed my father by word, deed, and love. I let this man lead me astray and pull me into a world I had craved so much. Without a word to said man, I walked out of our room and headed down the hallway. The air was cooler out here, and the main room got louder the closer I got to it. Soon Gunner was walking out, giving me another room full of stale air.
Hating Gunner (Grimm Brothers MC Book 2) Page 4