“I remember,” Sierra said immediately. And even as she said it, she knew it was true.
John seemed satisfied with her reply; he let her go and walked over to her painting. “I see you’ve created another masterpiece,” he said, his voice full of admiration.
Sierra beamed with pleasure from the compliment and walked over to the canvas as they looked on together.
“Your talent really amazes me. You are really something special, you know that?”
Again, Sierra didn’t know what to do with the praise, so she just put it away inside herself.
John turned and held her in his arms again in a way that was becoming more and more familiar to Sierra. He released her slowly again and then that smile rose up once more, as if he was sharing a secret with her—only she didn’t know what it was yet. Then he reached in his pocket, pulled something out, and cupped it in his hand.
“I have something for you,” he said.
“What is it?” Sierra asked.
“It’s a surprise. I want you to close your eyes for me.”
Sierra hesitated for only a second before obediently closing her eyes, putting her trust in her dream man.
Once her eyes were closed, she felt his hands lightly graze her neck and then felt the sensation of something small and a little cold hanging against her breastbone.
“Okay, now open your eyes,” John whispered.
Sierra looked down and saw her gift: a gold charm in the shape of a heart, suspended by a gold chain that hung just below her sternum. She looked up at John and his eyes were filled with kindness and a little worry. When she remained silent, his eyebrows began to furrow.
“Do you like it?” he finally asked.
Sierra then grasped that she had yet to speak. She was touched by the charm more than she could say. She wasn’t sure she had the words to fully express her feelings so she went with her initial thought. “It’s beautiful.”
John seemed to let out the breath that he was holding, and the signs of concern on his face melted away like snow in the spring. “Good!” he said. “Now, you and the world can know that you carry my heart with you everywhere you go.” And then he smiled with his whole person, and Sierra knew that she had never seen anyone light up in that way.
John held her again and gave her a sweet kiss, and his warmth seeped into her and lit a small flame that started in her toes and gradually went to her head, making her cheeks flush.
As they moved away from each other, they stared at one another and frantically tried to catch their breath. After a few minutes, they were able to breathe normally again. Sierra was a little amused at their labored panting, and John seemed to be as well.
John was the first to speak. “Come on, we need to get ready for service.”
Sierra’s confusion translated in her response. “What service?”
John shook his head. “I see I can’t leave you alone too long. You start to paint and just forget everything.” He took the sting out of his words with the honey in his voice.
Sierra smiled.
“We have service tonight at the church and then afterward we’re going to meet and talk about our plans for tomorrow with the voter registration drive,” John explained, all patience.
Sierra watched him as he walked over to her quilt and very carefully began to pick up and pack away her paint supplies. She went over to help. The paintbrush that she was holding before John came grabbed her attention and she picked it up, and as she did, the sound of the river’s flowing seemed to turn up its volume. Its melody hypnotized Sierra and she walked toward the water’s edge with the brush in hand. She bent down and immersed the paintbrush in the water, watching the green fade into the dark waters. And then there were just dark waters. And then there was nothing.
Chapter 14
Friday brought along sunshine and warmer temperatures for an early spring morning in Milwaukee. Sierra, happily surprised, welcomed the warm glow invading her bedroom through the window. She had to admit that the previous night’s dream hadn’t been a nightmare at all. The dream had left her feeling excited and a little rejuvenated. She didn’t know whether the painting or the man in the dream was what made her feel so energized. She imagined that the cause was probably a little bit of both. She could still remember John’s eyes, though for some reason she couldn’t remember anything else about his face. She was sure that she had looked into those gentle eyes before—in another life, maybe.
She enjoyed a long, languid stretch and let out a nice high-pitched sound to go along with it. She was smiling as she got ready to face her day. The smile stayed on her face as she placed her feet on the floor.
The night before, she had really worked herself up thinking about her date with Dale. She had been anxious, and had spent the evening going back and forth between whether she would go or simply cancel. She felt uncomfortable about it yesterday, but with the warm feeling of her dream to buoy her, she was feeling much better today. She told herself that she would give herself the afternoon to think about what would be best; for now, she had a meeting with Steve.
Steve wanted to go and see the same house again. When they’d spoken on the phone the previous day, he’d asked her to meet him outside of the property around twelve thirty, which Sierra assumed was his lunch break.
Until then, Sierra had the morning to herself. She decided as she was washing her face that she would go to an art supply store and get some oils, brushes, and a canvas to work on. Why not? she thought. I’ll start a little vacation right here in the city.
She had a long, hot shower and took her time getting dressed afterward in dark jeans, a canary-yellow cashmere sweater, and her high, black, soft-leather boots.
Sierra looked at her cell phone on the way out the door and couldn’t believe that it was nine in the morning. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d left the house so late.
The art supply store didn’t open until ten, so she decided to take a drive around the lakefront. She always found it quite pleasant and moving to look at the vastness of Lake Michigan. It brought her instant peace.
She drove the winding road that curved around the lake, once, and then twice, before finally deciding to get herself to the art store. Once there, she picked out a cornucopia of colors, along with an array of brushes, an easel, and a canvas. She decided that she would paint with oil, a medium she had always enjoyed. She felt good as she got in the car and headed over to Brown Deer to meet Steve at the house.
Sierra reached the house about an hour early, so she pulled out her journal to do a little writing while she waited in the car for Steve.
Dear Diary,
Well, I haven’t had any nightmares in a couple of weeks, although I have had dreams. In the dreams I feel as though I’ve been learning something about myself and the kind of person I want to be. Maybe the nightmares have gone away because I’ve learned all that they could teach me. They showed me that I have been unhappy, taking the blessings in my life for granted and really not living up to my full potential as a person.
But I don’t think I’ve figured out what my full potential is, or even what it is that would make me happy. I mean—don’t get me wrong—on the one hand, the dreams were scary and disturbing. But, on the other hand, the person in the dreams lately is a fearless woman, a woman of action and strength. She is a helper and giver and is confident in who she is and what she should do. That’s definitely not me yet. Maybe one day, but not yet.
A knock on her driver’s window made Sierra jump in her seat. It was Steve, staring at her with a smile on his face. She smiled back before she even knew she was doing it and brought her hand down from her chest, where she had placed it after her scare. She grabbed the door handle and pulled the lever as Steve moved out of the way.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” he immediately told her as she stepped out of the car.
Instantly, Sierra felt a little déjà vu, as the words mirrored what had happened at their last meeting. “It’s fine, no pr
oblem. So, shall we?” she asked. Without waiting for an answer, she closed the car door, hit the lock button on her key fob, and headed toward the property. She moved so fast that Steve had to rush to keep up with her.
The front lawn was still inviting with its well-kept grass and red-bricked walkway leading straight to the front door.
Keys in her hand, Sierra turned to Steve before opening the door. “So, do you think you’ve come to a decision about the place?”
“Actually, I think I have. I just want to take one last look before I make a final decision.”
“Great,” Sierra exclaimed a little too cheerily as she opened the door and then walked in all the way to allow Steve access to enter the house behind her. She was feeling very nervous around him. As soon as she’d seen him outside her car window, her stomach had started doing flips and her heart had begun to beat fast. She had been thinking about him since the last time they were together, although she didn’t want to admit it. And now seeing him again was doing funny things to her insides. She needed some fresh air and some space.
Already heading for the kitchen, she called behind her, “I’ll give you a chance to look around again and familiarize yourself with the house. If you have any questions, just let me know.”
“I actually wanted to get your opinion on a couple of things if you don’t mind,” Steve said quickly.
Sierra stopped in her tracks, then pivoted and retraced her steps back to Steve’s side. “Umm. Sure. That’s no problem. What do you need my opinion on?”
“Uh . . .” Steve walked toward the living room, and beckoned with his hand for Sierra to follow. “I was wondering what kind of table would fit in here, and do you think I could possibly set up an entertainment center along this wall?” He pointed to the wall adjacent to the entrance, which looked as if it was made for a television and entertainment center.
Sierra was a little confused at his apparent cluelessness but happy to say something that might get him to make up his mind. “Yes,” she said, “this area is definitely made for an entertainment center.” She gestured to the space next to her. “I think you could get a coffee table in here as well, along with a couch, loveseat, and any other furniture you might want to set up. It’s very spacious and open to all different kinds of interpretations.”
Sierra finished her spiel and then smiled at Steve encouragingly—only the way Steve was looking at her was sending shivers down her spine. A part of her still wanted to deny it, but she wasn’t a complete idiot. This man was attracted to her, and he didn’t seem to feel the need to hide it today. An electricity was in the air that couldn’t be denied. She really, really wanted to get away from him. This attraction was inappropriate, and she hadn’t closed the deal yet. She needed to break eye contact, like now.
Dragging her eyes away from his gaze, she tried to ease the tension that had all of a sudden filled the room. “Was there anything else that you needed my opinion on?” she asked, looking anywhere but at him.
“Actually, yes, there is. If you could just follow me.” Steve walked out of the living room back into the foyer space and began to climb the hardwood stairs to the second floor.
Sierra reluctantly followed, holding on to the smoothness of the oakwood banister to try and maintain composure. It seemed that the longer she was around him, the more she was attracted to him. She was feeling really flustered at this point, but she was a professional and was determined to shake off this crazy feeling. Still, she couldn’t help glancing at his back as they climbed the stairs—his strong, broad back, which matched perfectly with his broad shoulders and muscular arms. This man definitely worked out, and his skin was the most beautiful ebony—and it was so smooth. His hair was cut so it was nicely tapered, jet black, perfect . . . And I should get my mind straight and stop staring at this man.
They reached the top of the stairs and the hallway opened into three different directions. The white walls welcomed entrance to the left and to the right. Steve went to the right, away from the master bedroom, for which Sierra was very, very grateful. He opened up the door to the smallest of the four bedrooms and walked in and around the room.
The walls in here were red, and the room housed a large picture window that looked out into the backyard. The windowsill was big enough for cushions for seating, and Sierra suddenly imagined herself looking out the window at the pale moonlight and painting the brilliance of the sky. She walked over and sat down on the windowsill so that she was facing the open room and Steve. “So, what was your question?”
Steve shook his head a bit, a bemused look on his face. “I’m sorry, what?”
Sierra smiled and repeated her question. “You said you had some questions about this room. What were they?”
Steve seemed to scour his brain for a moment, and then he said, “What would you do with this room?”
“What would I do with this room?”
He nodded.
She pondered the question. “Well . . .” Sierra smiled to herself, thinking about the oil paints that she had in the car. “I would make it a study or hobby room.”
“Do you have a specific hobby in mind?”
“Actually, I do. I would make this room my painting room, almost like my very own studio. I love this picture window and I love the color of the room.”
Sierra couldn’t believe that she’d shared that; she told almost nobody about her passion for painting. She’d put that side of her away inside of herself a long time ago so she could concentrate on her advertising and real estate. She was quite surprised that she would share this part of herself with a person who was almost a stranger. But there was something in Steve’s eyes that seemed so warm and open.
“So you paint.” Steve jumped right on that bit of information.
“I haven’t in a long time but I’m starting again,” Sierra said.
“Why haven’t you painted in a long time? I mean, you clearly enjoy it. Your face lit up as soon as the words left your mouth.”
Sierra was disconcerted about the fact that the conversation was all of a sudden about her. Change the subject. “I don’t know. I guess I just haven’t had the time. But this isn’t about me, this is about you. So what do you think of the room?”
Steve slowly nodded his head and looked around the room once again. “I really like this room. I think it definitely opens up a person’s sense of creativity.” He looked in her direction. “And I really like the view.”
Ignoring the leading comment, Sierra decided to turn it around. “Yes, the view from the window is very nice.”
Steve laughed at this statement, though Sierra wasn’t sure why. She decided not to pursue the matter. They had gotten personal enough for one day. She led the way out of the room and back into the upstairs hallway. “So, have you seen enough?”
“Yes, I’ve seen enough and I’ll take it,” Steve said.
Sierra noticed the reluctance in his voice, and wondered briefly what its source was—but her excitement over closing the deal trumped her curiosity. Manically jumping up and down for joy in her mind, she calmly put her hand out to Steve. “Congratulations!”
Steve took her hand in his and let her small fingers curl around his bigger ones.
Once again, Sierra felt that jolt go through her body at their contact, and she tried to release his hand as quickly and efficiently as possible. This time, Steve was willing to let it go, and Sierra took the opportunity to lead the way back down the stairs.
“Well, I’ll go ahead and draw up the necessary papers and get the closing started,” she said as they reached the bottom of the stairs. “I want to congratulate you again on your purchase.”
“Well, thank you so much for all of your help.”
“You’re welcome. After all, it is my job,” Sierra joked and laughed.
Steve responded with a huge smile.
She quickly made her way back to the front door, praying that Steve would follow her lead. She didn’t like the intimacy she was feeling being around him. The problem w
asn’t that she was scared of him; she was more afraid of how he made her feel. She had never felt a connection like this before in her life, and she didn’t know how to handle it. Steve was also still her client, and the way he was affecting her was completely unacceptable in her book.
It seemed that Steve could take a hint; he followed Sierra out the door without a word. But as they exited the property along the brick walkway, he touched her arm to stop her progression and said, “Hey, how about we go celebrate? I mean, I’m feeling really good, and it would be a treat for me to be able to buy you lunch as a thank-you.”
Sierra’s first instinct was to say no. “There’s really no need to thank me. It’s my job to find houses for my clients. Anyway, you realize that I get a commission from this sale, right? That’s all the thanks I need,” Sierra said. She flashed a weak smile. “And besides, don’t you have to get back to school?”
“Actually, I took the rest of the day off.”
Sierra frowned. “Why would you do that?”
“Because I didn’t know how long I’d need to look at the house and make my final decision today. So, how about it?” Steve lifted his eyebrows. He looked hopeful.
Sierra sighed as she felt herself wanting to give in. As much as this man messed with her equilibrium, she thought he was a nice person and was really happy that they’d found him a place that worked for him. On the other hand, he was a client, and she didn’t want him to get the wrong idea.
“Look, you’re my client and I would really like to keep this professional—”
“Hey, I’m just saying, let’s have lunch and maybe talk about the sale and celebrate a little. I promise my invitation is completely innocent.”
Chapter 15
Sierra chose a little sandwich shop right around the corner from where they were, wanting to avoid the situation appearing too much like a date. They each got turkey clubs and soup.
Steve opened doors, pulled out chairs, and was as attentive as any woman could ask for. Sierra was impressed. He had an air about him that put her at ease, and he was extremely easy to talk to. She hadn’t expected that, and she was completely disarmed—so much so that she started talking about her time at the ad agency and her current work. She talked about her parents, her siblings, and even her painting. She was so comfortable that she almost started talking about her dreams, but she caught herself just in time.
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