by E. L. Todd
“I confronted her about the whole thing. She admitted to it.”
“She did?” I asked in surprise.
He nodded. “I told her I spotted her with Leo. I told her I later told Leo she was playing both of us, which was why he dumped her the same day I did. And I told her not to lie to you.”
Would Sara really lie to me? I couldn’t believe it. “But I just asked her.”
“She doesn’t want you to be with me, and she’s willing to lie to make that happen. She’s angry at me for hurting her. She’s angry with me for playing her so well.”
“But…” I still couldn’t wrap my head around it. “I need to ask her myself.”
“Isn’t my word good enough?” He asked. “I was just there. I just told you everything that happened.”
“She’s my best friend, Volt. I want to hear it from her mouth.”
He growled in frustration. “If you go over there, she’s just going to lie to you. That’s what I’m telling you. Why isn’t my word good enough for you? She’s playing us both.”
“Your word is good enough for me,” I argued. “But I want to confront her myself. I’ll tell her you told me everything. How will she be able to get out of that?”
He shook his head in anger. “Taylor, why don’t you believe me?”
“I never said I didn’t believe you.”
“You think I’m making all of this up?”
“I didn’t say that either.”
“Then accept my story and accept the fact that your friend is a lying psychopath.”
I couldn’t accept that part. “Just let me talk to her.”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “She’s just going to lie to you.”
“I have to give her the benefit of the doubt.”
“The only way it’s possible she didn’t lie is if I made up this entire story. You really think I would do that? If you actually believe that, then why were we ever together at all?”
“Volt, that’s not what I said,” I snapped. “Just calm down.”
“I’m not going to fucking calm down. I’ve been telling the truth this entire time, but you keep siding with that stupid cunt—”
“Don’t call her—”
“I’ll call her whatever the fuck I want.” He took a step forward, making me back up in fear. “I’ll never understand why you trust her so much. She’s a lying whore. You should believe me. I’m your best friend. I’ve never lied to you.”
“She’s never lied to me either. Just let me talk to her.” We’d been friends forever. Not once in that time span had she ever lied to me. This situation was complex and didn’t make any sense. The only way to get to the bottom of it was by interviewing both sides. “I’m not saying you’re lying. I’m not saying she’s lying. Just let me talk to both parties so I can figure out what happened.”
He stepped back from me, about to snap. He needed to put space between us so I wouldn’t get in the crossfire. “Fine. Whatever. Talk to her. But don’t expect me to wait around for the verdict.” He stormed out of my apartment without shutting the door behind him. I heard his heavy footfalls as he walked out, his anger echoing in the hallway.
I grabbed my purse and keys and prepared to pay a visit to Sara. All my drive disappeared in that moment. Just a short while ago, I was happy. I had everything I needed. But now it seemed like a lifetime ago, something I would never see again.
***
I walked into Sara’s apartment, and everything felt exactly the same.
“Hey, what’s up?” She was in her pajamas with her hair in a bun. “I was about to head to bed. Everything alright?”
If she just had a conversation with Volt, it didn’t seem like it. The TV was on, and she was watching her favorite reality TV show. A bottle of wine sat there, like usual. “Uh, Volt just came by my place and said he stopped by?”
“Yeah, he did. He was only here for five minutes then he left.”
“And what happened?” I didn’t make any assumptions because that would be wrong. She’d been my best friend forever. I was sure she had an explanation for what happened. And if she did cheat on Volt and lied about it beforehand, she would come clean now. I had faith.
“He said I cheated on him. Said he saw me in a bar with some guy. I told him that wasn’t me. He probably saw a woman who looked just like me. But it wasn’t me.”
“Oh…what did he say?”
“He kept repeating the same story, saying it was me. But I knew where I was that night. I was working late because I fell behind on one of the projects. I told him I would find my time card and show it to him, but he didn’t want to hear about it. He’s so fixated on the idea that I cheated on him that he won’t listen to any other explanation.”
“Because he said you admitted it…” I was getting two completely different stories.
Someone was lying.
Who was it?
“No, he misunderstood me.” She sat on the couch and grabbed her glass of wine. “I said I understood why he assumed it was me. I mean, there are blondes everywhere. And I also understood why he left me, even if it wasn’t the right thing to do. But I never said I cheated on him—because I didn’t.”
Maybe it was just a misunderstanding. Volt had a bad temper sometimes and maybe he was so frustrated by our situation he didn’t listen correctly. Maybe he just listened for things he wanted to hear and tuned everything else out. He didn’t lie to me. He just shared his side of the story. “Sorry to bother you this late at night. I just wanted to get the full story.”
“I feel bad for him,” she whispered. “He’s trying so hard to make this work. I’m sure he’s willing to lie about it. I mean, it’s obvious how much he loves you. I can’t blame him for working so hard.”
I knew Volt wanted to make this work, but I doubted he would lie to make it happen. Misleading people wasn’t in his nature. Never had been. But when times were desperate, people did desperate things. “Well, thanks for talking to me.”
“No problem. Don’t be too hard on him. He’s a good guy.”
When she was sweet and caring, how could I believe she would ever lie? It must have just been a huge misunderstanding. “I know he is.”
***
After work the next day, I called him.
He picked up but didn’t speak into the phone.
“Volt?”
“What?”
I ignored his hostility. “Can I come by? I talked to Sara.”
“No. I don’t have time for this.”
“Time for what?”
“You believe her.”
“I never said that. Can I come by so we can talk about it? I’d rather not have this conversation on the phone.” I was walking down the sidewalk with people passing me. Voices carried to my ear, making it difficult to concentrate on what he was saying.
“Whatever.” He hung up.
I sighed and shoved the phone into my pocket, knowing this conversation would be difficult. He was so upset he couldn’t see reason. I didn’t blame him. I’d been there before.
I walked inside his apartment and saw him standing in the entryway, waiting for me.
“What?” he barked. “Get this shit over with.”
I set my bag down. “Why are you being a dick right now?”
“Because you believe her. It’s bullshit.”
“I never said that.”
“What else did you come here to say? If you believed me, you would’ve had a very different reaction over the phone.” He crossed his arms over his chest, his facial hair coming in from not shaving for a few days.
“I talked to her last night, and I think I know what happened.”
“Oh, really?” His voice was full of condescension. “Enlighten me.”
“She said she never cheated on you, but you still think she did. She even has an alibi, but you still didn’t believe her. It sounds like a misunderstanding on both parts.”
Out of nowhere, he started laughing, high and maniacal. The piercing sound fill
ed the apartment, hurting my ears because it was so loud. “Fuck, you’re stupid.” He kept laughing. “This is just…it’s so stupid it’s funny.”
I narrowed my eyes, the insult hurting. “Excuse me?”
“I said you’re fucking stupid.” He stopped laughing, giving me the coldest stare I’d ever seen. “I’m done with us, Taylor. I’m officially finished. I don’t want to work on this relationship. I don’t want to be with you.” He opened a drawer in his kitchen and pulled out a small device. It looked like a recorder. Along with it was a small, black box. It looked like a jewelry case. “I don’t want a woman who doesn’t trust me. I don’t want a woman who doesn’t believe a word I say.” He grabbed the recorder and set it on the kitchen table beside me. “I knew Sara was a lying cunt. So when I went over there, I recorded the entire conversation. I was afraid this would happen. I was afraid you’d pick her over me. And you know what? You did.” He peered into my face, nothing but hatred residing deep inside. “Listen to it. Then get the fuck out of my apartment.” He slammed his fist down on the table, making a sound so loud it made me jolt. He walked to the door. “Goodbye, Taylor. Hope you and Sara are very happy together.”
***
“Sara, I’m proposing to Taylor. I already have a ring. As soon as she’s finished moving in, I’m getting down on one knee. And I know she’ll say yes.”
Sara didn’t respond. There was just a pause.
“Don’t take away the happiest day of your best friend’s life. It’s not right.”
Sara still didn’t speak.
“Seriously?” Volt asked in shock. “You’re still going to lie to her? What happens when I tell her what we talked about?”
“I’ll deny it. And she’ll believe me.”
Oh. My. God.
Volt’s voice was full of hatred. “You’re sick, you know that?”
“Maybe,” she whispered. “But it looks like you’re single.”
The recorder ended and went silent.
I stared at it and waited for something else to happen. But nothing ever did. I looked at the box Volt left behind. Inside was the ring he bought for me, the ring I would never wear.
I couldn’t process what just happened. I wasn’t sure if I was more depressed that Volt left me or that Sara lied to my face—twice. She didn’t care about my happiness. All she cared about was herself.
I felt stupid.
I sacrificed my relationship with Volt just to give her the benefit of the doubt. I wanted to do the right thing by being pragmatic. I knew there was an explanation that showed them both in a good light.
But I was wrong.
Very wrong.
I fell into the chair and tried not to give into the grief. I didn’t just lose Volt. I lost Sara too. She was my best friend, my family. And she stabbed me so hard in the back I couldn’t breathe.
Now what did I do?
I lost everything that mattered to me. The happy life I had once before disappeared like a puff of smoke. Everything I believed in had been shaken. Volt turned his back on me, and I knew I couldn’t blame him for it.
I stared the box and felt my fingers tingle. I wanted to open it, to look inside and see what he had picked out for me. As soon as I finished moving in, he was going to ask me to spend his life with him.
And I would have said yes.
I couldn’t open the lid. If I saw the ring, it would just make this a million times harder. If I saw the special diamond he picked out just for me, the ring he imagined me wearing until we were old and gray, I would collapse then and there.
I had to keep going.
I left the kitchen table, leaving the recorder and the ring behind. This was the last time I would ever be in Volt’s apartment, so I gathered my things before I walked out. I didn’t want to come back there again. I didn’t want to look at him. If I did, I would just break down.
I got my stuff and left.
***
Sara opened the door, sweaty and in her gym clothes. She must have just got home. “Hey, I—”
“I can’t believe you lied to me.” Now that I was face-to-face with her, I couldn’t control my rage. I never wanted to hit someone before, but I desperately wanted to slap her hard across the face.
Shit, I wanted to bitch-slap her.
She kept up her charade. “Taylor, I didn’t lie about anything. Volt is the one—”
“I’m this close to knocking your teeth out.” I pushed her back, making her stumble until she got her footing again. “Volt recorded the conversation the two of you had. I heard everything you said. And don’t make up some bullshit about it being fabricated because I recognized your voice, and I heard Desperate Housewives in the background.”
Sara’s face immediately changed. Her innocent charade disappeared once she’d been caught.
And somehow that made things worse. “I can’t believe you did this to me.”
“Taylor, let me explain—”
“You don’t need to. I heard the recording. All you cared about was getting back at him for what he did to you. You were willing to sacrifice my happiness to make it happen.” I placed my hand across my chest. “Your best friend. What’s wrong with you?”
“I…” She struggled to find an explanation but couldn’t. “I don’t know. I just… I didn’t want you to know I did that. You would think less of me.”
“I would never think less of you for anything—besides lying. So yes, I think you’re scum now.”
Her eyes flinched in pain.
“And the fact that you would hurt me like that, turn me against Volt because you knew I blindly trusted you…makes me sick.”
She dropped her face, shame in her eyes.
“Volt is gone. He left me.”
She didn’t move.
“He left me because I didn’t believe him. I insisted on giving you the benefit of the doubt, knowing there was some other explanation for what happened. He got fed up with me and left. He gave me the ring and walked out. I can’t go after him and try to make our relationship work because I don’t blame him for leaving. I’d judge him if he stayed. And that’s all your fault.” I poked her hard in the chest. I was so angry, tears formed in my eyes. I was frustrated for being punished for trying to do the right thing. I refused to choose my boyfriend over my best friend, and I refused to choose my best friend over my boyfriend. But I still got screwed in the end. “I’ll never forgive you for this, Sara. I can’t even look at you.” I was done with this friendship—or whatever the hell it was. Was any of it ever real? Did it ever mean anything? “Don’t contact me. I mean it.” I walked out of her apartment for the last time and shut the door.
Once I was down the hallway, I felt the tears of sorrow drip down my face. I hated her so much for what she did to me, but I was still saying goodbye to a piece of myself. Sara was family to me, and now she was gone. I broke up with the two people I loved most in the same day.
It was a miracle I was still standing.
***
Volt never called me. And I didn’t expect him to.
I unpacked everything back in my apartment and tossed the boxes in the trash. It looked just the way it did before I left, but it would never feel quite the same. It was where I lived now, but Volt’s place was still home in my heart.
Going through his things and hiding them away was the hardest part. I knew he wasn’t coming back. From now on, I would sleep in my bed alone. One day, I would be well enough to start dating again, and a new man would sleep beside me. But the thought of that happening brought me even more sorrow.
I really had to move on without him.
I was grateful it wasn’t summertime yet, and the kids were still in school. If I didn’t have work to focus on, the depression would swallow me whole. I did my best to concentrate on my students and give them the best education possible. They were actually helping me more than they realized. It was a safe place away from home, a place where I didn’t think about the man who left me.
The gang didn’t
contact me or ask me questions about our breakup. They either knew and understood I needed space. Or they didn’t have a clue and would know soon enough.
I didn’t want to talk about it.
Sara didn’t call me either. She was smart enough not to reach out to me. If she did, I might actually slap her. My fondness for her slowly faded and hatred took over completely. I couldn’t believe I trusted someone so blindly. And then she backstabbed me the second I got in her way.
Was anyone trustworthy?
Volt immediately came into my mind. He was always loyal to me, right from the beginning.
But I screwed that up.
Over the span of two weeks, I lost a lot of weight. I wasn’t sure how it was possible since I didn’t exercise. But I didn’t eat anything so it made sense. When I felt like I would pass out, I ate crackers because that was all I could handle.
Every day seemed to pass slower than the last. Sometimes I wondered what Volt was doing, but I knew it was best not to think about it. He’d probably already had a few girls over, occupying the bed I once slept in.
When the thoughts made me cry, I forced myself to stop.
I had to move on.
I had to keep going.
Maybe, one day, if I were lucky enough, I would be happy again.
Or maybe not.
Chapter Seventeen
Volt
“Holy shit.” Derek stared at me with wide eyes. “I can’t believe that.”
“Well, believe it.” I downed the shot then told the bartender to pour me another.
She came over to me, her boobalicious chest on display for everyone to see. “Wow. You’re a drinker, aren’t you?”
“I sure am, sweetheart.” I tapped my glass on the counter.
She filled it to the brim before she gave me a smile.
I winked.
She walked away and tended to the other customers. Before her shift was over, she’d probably give me her number.
And I’d take it.
Derek grabbed my shoulder. “What the hell? It’s really over?”
“Yeah.” I clinked my glass against his. “I’m single again. It’s great.”