Bound to the Bad Boy
Page 13
“So they all wanted a taste of the bad boy, eh?” He huffed. “I never have and never will have time for shallow airheads or women after a badge just to prove they’ve had every man they set their cap at. I hate that type of woman. I want real, warm, and passionate. Sweet.”
“So you’re saying you haven’t been with…” She couldn’t finish. It hurt her too badly to even think it.
He sighed. “Oh sweetheart…I wish I could say I’ve been a monk since you left but it just isn’t true.” He raised his hands then slapped them on his hard thighs. “I have needs…I was lonely…you left me.”
She nodded, her chest heaving with pain. “I did. And I’m sorry.”
“If we’d stayed together, Megan, I never would have gone with another woman. Ever. You were my world…you were all I needed. All I wanted. Didn’t you know that?”
“I guess I did. But I just got so scared. I loved you so completely and it consumed me so deeply that I began to get real scared. I mean, loving you like that meant that I was just so vulnerable. If you had hurt me or abandoned me, I would have been broken.”
“So you decided to dump me before I had a chance?”
He scowled at her then looked off at the trees. Megan followed his eyes. Everywhere, the trees. Shielding the cabin from the road. Sheltering it from the worst of the elements. Protecting them from the outside world. Like Matt had protected her.
“It sounds so awful when you put it like that.”
“It was awful.” He rubbed his palms on his jeans. His hair flopped forwards onto his face but he left it there. Hiding his eyes as he lowered his gaze.
“Going away to college gave me chance to evaluate my life. Our life. I hadn’t been away from you since we started dating and it gave me a new perspective.”
“You realized that life was better without me.” He brushed his hair back from his face and looked at her again. He worked his jaw from side to side. As if he was fighting to hold back his emotions or a torrent of abuse for her betrayal.
“At first…” She took a deep breath. Be honest. It’s the only way. “At first it seemed that way. I missed you while I was away but it was good to see you when I came home. But you were often busy with the club and I felt a bit…left out I guess. I know, I really do, that life is like that for an old lady but I began to wonder if I could do it. Then…towards then end of my final year…”
“When I was arrested…”
She inclined her head and stared down at her hands. “It seemed like the perfect excuse.”
“Of course.” He shifted on the step and stretched his long legs out in front of him. Megan stared at his bulky black boots and her heart jumped. Even his footwear got her hot and reminded her how much she adored him.
“Oh, Matt, I’m sorry.”
“I am too.” He reached out and took hold of one of her hands. “But you believed that I was guilty?”
“No… Never. Not really. I mean…I couldn’t accept that you would do something to kill an innocent man.”
“I didn’t, Megan. I was set up.”
“I know that now.”
“Now?” He raised his eyebrows and perused her face. Heat filled her cheeks. She had to explain.
“Gil Creedy told me what happened. You were just the wrong man at the wrong time…but the right time for the police.”
He raised her hand to his lips. “I was a nuisance to the cops. I caused them no end of problems with my so-called bad boy ways and they could see where I was headed. They knew I’d take after my old man and they tried to hinder me.”
“But when you want something…”
“I get it. Except for you.”
“Oh, Matt… you had me.”
“Had?” His face dropped.
She grabbed hold of his hands and pulled them into her lap.
“I never really believed it, Matt. But I wanted to because it gave me an excuse to stay away. I thought that I wanted normal. Thought that I wanted to be away from you, the club and Cherub. But I was wrong. I’ve tasted another life…I’ve sampled it and given it a chance.”
“And?”
She shook her head. “It was a bitter disappointment. Maybe, for other people, that life is fine. They like their nine to five jobs and their holiday weekends with colleagues and living by the law. Within the law. With their safe boyfriends and their well-behaved children and…and…” It was so tough trying to explain.
“So you’re telling me that you don’t want safe and boring and…children?”
“No…no…I don’t want the life that exists away from Cherub or that doesn’t have you in it. I love you so much and being without you was torture. I’m glad that I’ve been away because it has confirmed how much I want to be with you. But I do…hope…one day…to have children.”
“Well behaved ones?” He wiggled his eyebrows.
“Well, yes. Of course. But spirited ones.”
“Oh I’m sure I can give you some of those.” He winked and pulled her onto his lap.
“So you can forgive me?”
“There’s nothing to forgive, sweetheart. I understood then, just as I do now, that you had to take some time away. You were a kid when we got together.”
“So were you!”
“I was older … by two years.”
She mock punched his chest. “Big deal.”
“I’d been through a lot by the time I arrived in Cherub.”
Megan tucked her head beneath his chin. She knew he’d been through more than she could ever fathom. His hippy mother with her restless feet and biker father devoted to his charter meant that Matt hadn’t had a very stable a childhood. She could understand why the Night Warriors had become his bedrock. They were a solid presence in his life and with so many strong, confident male figures around Matt had gained more than one father. He’d gained a whole barn full of them. She could never take that away from him. He needed his club. But he needed her too.
“I know, Matt. And my only issue was my animal lover parents who occasionally forgot to get me off to school on time, or didn’t have my dinner on the table by six each evening.”
“They always loved you, Megan. Almost as much as the bears.”
She laughed then and flung her arms around his neck. She pressed her lips against his and kissed him long and slow and deep.
When they came up for air, Megan was dizzy with excitement.
“So where do we go from here?”
He gazed at her. “Well I have that big old house just waiting for you. I built it for you. Always hoping you’d come back to me.”
Her throat ached with emotion. “You did?”
“All yours. You want it?”
“Yes, please.”
“You okay with me…and the guys…”
“Of course. I know how much they mean to you. But if we’re going to…uh…make some baby bikers, you have to promise to be careful. I can’t live if I’m constantly worried that you’re going to be thrown into jail for something you didn’t do.”
He gave her a small salute. “I promise. And how do you feel about our multi-dimensional relationship?”
She grinned. “I still want that…you will always be my master. My lover. My best friend.”
“Well, that sounds like a deal to me.”
“I love you, Matt. Master. My bad boy.”
“And I love you, Megan. Sub. My world.”
They began kissing and fell backwards onto the porch. Megan was caught up in a whirlwind of desire as Matt peeled away her clothes and what remained of her inhibitions then kissed her everywhere. When he entered her needy body, she wrapped her legs around his waist and held him tight.
There was no doubt about it. Their time apart had only confirmed what she already knew. Even after all these years, she was bound to the bad boy. He had never lost his hold on her and she had never really been able to let him go.
The End
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