“Shut ya mouths,” Shirley yelled at them, and they shut up, looking away from us.
She took me into an elevator that reeked of urine. I tried my hardest not to gag. When the elevator lurched, I thought it was going to fall and we’d be stuck with that stink for hours. I didn’t even want to touch the walls to steady myself because they looked like they could have poo on them. But we came to a stop and the doors opened.
The hallway didn’t smell much better though. There were holes in some of the walls and cigarette butts all over the floor. I heard something rustle in a pile of pizza boxes and didn’t want to think what had caused it or I’d panic and scream and make an idiot of myself.
Shirley opened the door to her apartment. I followed her in. The smell changed but was just as unpleasant, like nothing had been cleaned in a long, long time—a mixture of rotten food and sour milk that made my stomach churn. I wanted to cover my nose but that would’ve been rude.
The room we entered had threadbare carpet and a bed sheet with a sun-faded pattern pinned up to cover the window. It had fallen down in one corner and the bright purple floral showed at the flipped over edge.
The only furniture in the room was an old sofa and an even older chair, both stained and torn. I sat on the edge of the chair.
“Do you want a drink?” she asked. “I don’t have much… maybe a glass of water?”
I gulped.
“No. I’m fine.” To be honest, I didn’t want to drink out of anything in that apartment. I’d be too scared. Was this how Jack had grown up? I ached inside, trying to imagine how it’d be for a small kid a place like this.
I’d thought that falling down boarding house I’d had to move to after Dad disappeared was a dump but it was nothing compared to this. I could hear the sound of about 50 TV sets competing with each other and, over the top of all that, the sound of a man hollering curses.
Shirley lit up a cigarette.
I wasn’t sure how to approach things with her. I figured I’d need to just come straight out with it.
“Does Jack know about Frank?” I asked.
Her face creased up for a moment, as though trying to remember. “I never told him. I’ve not been the best mum to him, I know that but I couldn’t tell him. I reckon he has some idea about what happened though, stuff he’s pieced together, ya know what I mean. Most of the time he lived with his Nan, so he doesn’t know the full story. Never asked, either.”
She paused to drag on her cigarette. I wasn’t sure if she was going to continue.
“Somewhere along the line, Frank got in touch with him. Maybe he realised he’d never have any other kids, I dunno. But he gave me money, then he stopped, and he started giving money directly to Jack. Helped him in a lot of ways Jack never knew about as well. Hell, he’d have worked it out by now if he’s not stupid. If he don’t know, it’s because he don’t wanna.”
She picked up a discarded Coke can off the floor and ashed her cigarette into it.
“When he attacked me, what could I do? I tried to tell people but they didn’t wanna know. ‘What would he want with you?’ they said. He could have had any girl on campus. But I never wanted him. He said I made it up and everyone believed him. He said I was a slut but I wasn’t. Not back then.”
I asked her if she knew my father, holding my breath, hoping she’d say she’d never heard of him.
She nodded.
“That’s why I told you about this. I knew who your dad was when I first saw you. You look just like him. You needed to know what him and his cronies are like. The three of them, thick as thieves. Thought they could take whatever they wanted.” She sighed and ashed her cigarette again.
“Did Dad know?”
“Yeah, of course he did. He helped cover it up. Told them people I was all over Frank, threw myself at him, begged him to take me home with him. But it wasn’t like that. He followed me home and knocked me to the ground. It was all a joke to them. Every time I went to class after that, people would be laughing and saying nasty stuff. I got scared. Scared to walk home alone. Scared to go out. None of my friends wanted to talk to me. All kinds of stories went around about me. How I did all three of them. Total bullshit.”
A lump rose in my throat when I thought about how awful that must have been, but her voice remained emotionless and flat. It was like she was telling me about a TV show she’d seen, not something that had happened in real life.
“When I found out I was knocked up, I wanted to get rid of it. Of course I wanted to get rid of it. I’d dropped out of uni by then, driven out. I could’ve been something in life, ya know. A lawyer or something. I had fancy ideas. I’d not grown up with much but they were decent folk, my parents. I went to have it done too. I thought if I got rid of the baby, I’d get rid of all my problems. Things could go back to how they were before it all happened. But I couldn’t. I don’t even know why. I just didn’t care any more.”
I nodded, not sure what to say. The problem that she talked about, that was Jack.
“I wish I had. Man, I wish I had. What use is he to me?” The pitch of her voice rose and her words tumbled out like she was finally feeling the emotion behind them. “Every time I met a guy, they’d find out about that little bastard and dump me. He ruined my life.”
I wasn’t sure if she meant Jack or Frank. She kept combing her fingers through her hair and her eyes darted frantically around the room. I wondered if I’d done the right thing, making her talk about all this.
“Ended up dumping him with me mum. That was the only way I could have any fun. Without him ruining it. He was better off with her.” She laughed in a way that scared me, hollow and cruel. “I never wanted him.”
Poor Jack. He’d had to live with this?
“I never wanted him, I never wanted him.” She repeated the words like a mantra.
“But surely—”
“He was such a whiner. Never gave me any peace. Then Mum died and he found me again but my man, Bazza, didn’t want him around.”
Jack had told me about that. He’d been fourteen years old and had to live on the streets. When he’d said he lived on the streets, though, I’d had no idea what he’d meant what with all the lies and stories. After seeing the area where Shirley lived, I could imagine how awful Jack’s life would have been. The more she talked, the angrier I got. Even with all the bad that had happened to her, she could’ve tried to make a life for him. She could’ve been stronger.
“Now he won’t have anything to do with me. Won’t help out. He forgets all I’ve done for him,” she shrieked. “You wouldn’t understand; you wouldn’t know.”
Her eyes blazed for a moment, like she was about to attack me. I stood up and edged toward the door but then she slumped back onto the couch. She stopped talking and stared vacantly into space. I didn’t know if she’d said too much or if she’d just zoned out.
I wondered if I should leave, if she’d even notice. Her cigarette burned down in her hand almost burning her finger.
This was not a situation I knew how to handle. I just wanted to get out of that room without her noticing me.
“I guess I should go now,” I said.
She didn’t answer.
“Thanks for the chat.” I edged closer to the door.
There was nothing else left for me to say. I couldn’t think what to do so I took some money out of my bag, a couple of twenties, and left them on the couch beside her.
She turned her head slightly.
“Thanks, love. I’m a survivor. It’s all those other girls I’m worried about. No one wants to know about them.”
I stopped at the door.
“What other girls?” I’d not even thought that there might be others. If Frank had gotten away with this once, of course, he’d have done it again.
She didn’t say any more. It looked like she’d completely gone somewhere else in her mind. There was no getting through to her.
-o-
Jack was home when I got back.
“Where hav
e you been?” he asked.
“Shopping,” I replied. I really wanted to take a shower and wash the smell of destitution off me.
“So have I,” he said and held up the guitar he’d been strumming, a shiny guitar that didn’t look that different to any of the others he had.
“Do you need another guitar?”
“Do you need more shoes?” He grinned. I could hardly tell him I hadn’t been shopping for shoes.
I’d once thought that if Jack could reconcile with his mother, it’d mean he’d stop having these night terrors and become less messed up inside. It couldn’t be good for him, holding in all this bitterness and hate. Now I couldn’t see a way that could happen. I couldn’t even begin to imagine the darkness inside that woman. If she hadn’t been able to pull herself together for her son when he was young, what chance was there of her doing anything to help either of them now?
“It’s a nice guitar.”
“It’s not nice. Guitars are not nice. It’s freakin’ badarse.” He ran his fingers over the body of the guitar, caressing it and holding it close to his body.
“Wow, is it your new girlfriend? Am I dumped?”
“You jealous? Still, you have a point. This baby is never going to talk back to me, never going to nag me about leaving my socks on the floor, never going to—”
“Never going to give you sex…” I poked my tongue out at him. As if I was jealous of his stupid guitar.
I sat down beside him.
“I don’t need you now. I have my new guitar.” He turned away from me so I punched him on the arm.
“Are you trying to injure me? ‘Cause you know if I can’t play guitar, I can’t work. I might actually have to sue you for damages. Can you afford that?”
“You don’t even have the money to sue me. We’re both poor.” I thought about the money my father had asked me to transfer. I was going to ask Jack’s advice about that, but he hated my father. I think he’d be happy to see him go to jail, and definitely would not have wanted me to get further involved in this mess.
He sat his guitar down and kissed me.
“I guess I can’t do that to my guitar,” he said. “It’d ruin it.”
Chapter 19
I called the police. I figured the only way I’d be able to find out what was going on was to ask them outright. I needed to know everything. Ever since Dad had left, I’d only known bits of the story. Dad kept telling me things were okay and he’d get his name cleared but it seemed to me like his name was getting further and further from being cleared. It was as uncleared as you could get.
To be honest, I’d avoided trying to find out. I knew that Dad’s words didn’t ring true and I’d never even asked the cops when they’d been here before. People kept telling me I was better off not knowing anything and I believed them, happy to be in the dark, but I needed to face up to the reality of my father and the things he’d done. I had to prepare for the worst. Dad had said it wasn’t that bad, that it was just some business deals gone wrong, but I doubted that they be trying so hard to get him home if that were the case.
Daniel and Jet arrived, looking like a super crime-fighting duo. I invited them in and made them coffee. Daniel sat on one of the sofas. Jet sat beside him but scrutinized the apartment, as though checking for bugs or surveillance equipment.
“If your boyfriend home?” he asked.
“Is that relevant?” I answered. Jack was so not at home. He was back in the recording studio, but I wasn’t going to tell Jet that. He was here on official business, not checking-out-my-boyfriend business.
Jet didn’t answer.
I gave them their coffees and sat down on the couch opposite them.
“So, do you have any developments in the case?” Daniel asked. “Has your father contacted you by some other means?”
I nodded.
“But first, I want to know the full story. What is he being charged with? This must be pretty serious. You guys wouldn’t be involved if it wasn’t. But it’s just some business dealings, right? He’s gotten in over his head and needs to pay off some debts?”
That’s what my father had been telling me. It’s what Frank had been telling me too. I’d believed them until I’d talked to Shirley. Those words she’d said about the other girls rang in my head. What other girls? My father had covered up her rape, but that had been years ago. I had no idea what he and Frank had done since then.
A look passed between them that said a lot: a mixture of fear and worry.
“Officially, we can’t discuss this with you,” Daniel said.
“But you need my help with the investigation. He’s already been charged; it’s not like you need to keep things quiet.”
“There are some charges that haven’t been made public,” Jet said.
I gulped. “Bad?” I asked.
“You tell her, Daniel,” Jet said. He didn’t make eye contact with me. I felt sick and worried. Maybe I didn’t want to know.
“We thought you knew. It’s a criminal matter, not a corporate thing. The stuff that was in the papers, all that scandal, was just the tip of the iceberg. That stuff we were happy for the public to know. It’s much more serious and recently, other crimes have come to light.”
I wished he’d just tell me instead of beating around the bush. I picked up my coffee cup, wanting the reassurance of its warmth.
“There are a number of charges we’re looking at. And he wasn’t working alone. We have some idea about who he’s working with, but we need more information.” Now Daniel wouldn’t make eye contact with me either. I shivered and pulled my cardigan tightly around me.
“What are the charges?”
Daniel took a deep breath. It must be bad if he didn’t want to tell me.
“Trafficking. Sex trafficking. He’s been bringing in women from Thailand—”
For a moment, I didn’t register what he’d said. I just watched the coffee spill from my cup across the floor. Then the full impact hit me, hit me like a punch to the stomach. I hugged myself, the nausea rising. It couldn’t be true. It just could not possibly be true. He was my father. He could not do something so foul. The world went dark, and inside me everything heaved. I curled over to stop the pain but the entire contents of my stomach sprayed out of my mouth. I could hear a noise like a wounded animal and part of me realised that I was the one making it.
Daniel put his arm around me and helped me sit up.
“It’s not true. Please, it’s not true.” I pleaded with him, hoping he’d give me a spark of hope.
He didn’t answer me.
I had to clean up the mess I’d made. I had to get a cloth and clean the floor. I couldn’t just leave that mess there.
“Sorry, sorry,” I muttered.
I tried to walk to the kitchen, but my legs shook and buckled. Daniel grabbed me again before I collapsed. Thoughts buzzed around my head like flies. I wanted them to go away and leave me alone. My vision dissolved around the edges. Nothing made sense.
As Daniel led me back to the couch, I vaguely heard the door open.
“What’s wrong?” Jack was beside me. “What stinks?”
“I was sick. I’ll clean it up in a moment.” I wanted to say more but my voice didn’t work properly. I had to tell Jack what they’d told me, but I couldn’t.
Jack put a cold cloth on my head and then came back with some cleaning products.
“You don’t have to do that,” I murmured. “I can do it in a moment.”
He ignored me. I tried to get up, but couldn’t. Every time I tried to move, one thought kept slamming into my head. My father was a bad person; he was evil.
I raised myself up a little and looked at Daniel. “Can you tell Jack?” I asked.
“I’ll do it,” said Jet, and he took Jack into the kitchen.
I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t make myself say those words. I just wanted to sleep, to get away from all this.
“That’s fucked.” I could hear Jack in the kitchen. “That’s just fucked.”
Jack got me a glass of water and sat beside me on the couch.
“We’ll do anything we can to help, won’t we, Hannah.” He put his arm around me. “I always knew your dad was suspect. The way he’s treated you has been just wrong. He’s nothing but trouble.”
But Jack had never known my father. He’d changed. The last few years, he hadn’t been the father I’d grown up with. All those years of him being my best friend, the one I could rely on, had been washed away. The father who carried me on his shoulders, who sang along with me in the car, who told me I was his princess and that this whole world would be mine one day, his voice booming out strong. In those days, it seemed that my father was the strongest man in the world and he’d always protect me.
I nodded. I had to help. I couldn’t even think of that man as my father now. Everything he’d done and said had become a lie.
“He’s bringing women in… against their will… and making them… He’s really doing that?”
Daniel nodded. “I don’t think he’s involved on the ground, but he’s part of the operation. I know he’s got a few other people he’s working with here and overseas. We have some evidence, but I’m not sure if we have enough to make all the charges stick. There are still a lot of other charges though—money laundering, tax evasion and other things that we have definite proof of. Anything at all that you know, even if it doesn’t seem significant, could be a big help.”
They asked me a few more questions but I couldn’t think. My head buzzed and things swirled. I had the papers from Frank, but something held me back from mentioning them. I wanted this buried and taken away.
“I don’t think Hannah’s up to your questioning at the moment,” Jack said. “That’s enough for today.”
Daniel nodded. “We’ll come back in a few days, when you’ve had time to absorb all this. In the meantime, if your father tries to contact you or if you think of anything, give us a call.”
“This is going to be in the papers, isn’t it? As soon as he gets arrested, the media will be all over it.”
“Unfortunately, yes.”
I was doomed. I’d be known forever as the daughter of an evil man.
Bad Boy Redemption (Bad Boy Rock Star #3) Page 10