‘Yes,’ she found herself answering out loud, long before she had resolved any of the issues that worried her.
Rico’s smile and the relief in his eyes took her breath away. ‘Thank you. I know that contact with patients is important to you and you will still have that in allergy and immunology. As you have found with Pippa Warren, we work closely with our patients, often over long periods of time, and a great deal of detective work can be involved in making a diagnosis.’
‘Everything I’ve learned has been fascinating.’
Ruth listened avidly as Rico gave her a brief outline of just a few of the huge variety of cases he had seen this year alone in both adults and children. From rare conditions to the everyday food and substance intolerances, and numerous allergies, both familiar and unusual Ruth was fascinated.
‘Just today my assistant emailed background details on a new patient referred to us—a woman aged forty who has developed an allergy to sunlight,’ Rico explained, absently playing with her fingers. ‘She has no previous history of allergic reactions or immune problems, but now has extreme photosensitivity which is keeping her housebound. She has swelling and rashes. And her skin blisters after the shortest time exposed to the sun. Even indoors. So the windows of her house have been covered. As soon as I return to Italy I will begin investigating the cause.’
Intrigued, Ruth felt a welling of eager excitement. She wanted to join the team in finding an answer to the puzzle—and the many others that she would be presented with if she changed specialty. It would be foolish to cling to her career as a GP just to prove a point to her parents. She was still young, and she had the rest of her life ahead of her to make her own decisions and do what she wanted. An inner knowledge and certainty grew that this change would bring her the most professional satisfaction and fulfilment. Of course, there was Rico…She had met him in person just the day before, and yet she felt an instinctive connection with him, as if they had known each other for ever—as if she had been waiting for him for ever.
‘There is something else we must talk about,’ he said, as if reading her mind. Ruth tensed. His eyes were full of warmth and sincerity, and his voice dropped to a sexy timbre that tightened the ache deep inside her. ‘We cannot ignore the attraction between us, sirena mia. And I don’t want to. But I must make it completely clear from the first that whatever is between us personally is separate from work. One is not dependent on the other. The job offer comes to you without any strings or expectations.’
‘Rico—’
A finger pressed to her lips silenced her. ‘Please, I need to say this. It is not something I expected when I asked you to come here. And I am breaking all my rules,’ he added with a rueful and endearing smile. ‘I have never had any kind of relationship with a colleague beyond the professional. The clinic and my work have taken over my life, so much so that I have not even been on a simple date for nearly two years,’ he told her with surprising candour, leaving her speechless. His free hand settled over his heart, as if he was making a vow or a pledge. ‘But, this, with you…I’ve never felt anything like it, Ruth. Not ever. The moment I looked at you I experienced the incredible connection between us, and that was before I knew who you were. Which was why I was shocked when I learned your identity—I knew there would be complications because of work. But not insurmountable ones.’ Gentle fingers tucked a stray wisp of hair behind her ear, the brush of them against her skin making her tingle. ‘I know it is scary, sirena mia—it is for me, too—but this feels too unique and important to ignore and leave unexplored.’
She might be the biggest fool on earth, but she looked into those captivating, gold-speckled hazel eyes and believed every word he said. Although unsure exactly what he was suggesting, one thing she did know…Rico was right, it was scary. More frightening than he could possibly know. But the searing attraction was too real, too strong and too exciting to be denied.
The pad of his thumb brushed the bare ring finger on her left hand. ‘You are not already seeing anyone, Ruth?’
‘No.’
Reality intruded into the fantasy and brought her crashing back to earth. All her insecurities and fears, and her belief that Adam had been right about her, flooded back to torment her. How could she have imagined, even for a second, that she could possibly please a man like Rico? All reason must have deserted her for her to ever get so carried away by foolish dreams.
Ruth pulled away and stood up, moving to stand with her back to him, staring out towards the expanse of sea as the sun began its descent towards the far horizon, layering the darkening skies with mauves and pinks and golds.
Rico frowned and tried to work out what had caused the sudden change in Ruth. He knew so much more about her now, as much from the things she had not said as those that she had. Coming from a home filled with love himself, the lack of care her parents had shown her made him furious. And his heart ached for her. He had glimpsed all too clearly the little girl trying so hard to be loved, to be good enough, to please, only to have it all thrown back in her face…rejected and unappreciated.
Yesterday evening she had spoken of how ostracised she had felt as a woman with brains, resented and misunderstood, including by some of her colleagues. No wonder she felt so alone. Few people had loved, supported and encouraged her in the past. But he wanted to do all those things and more, now and in the future—if only she would let him. He would show her how special she was. But first he had to find out what had upset her.
Rico rose to his feet, walked up behind her, and wrapped her in his arms, feeling the tension in her rigid frame. ‘What is wrong, sirena mia?’
She shook her head, remaining unyielding in his hold. He nuzzled against her, breathing in her scent, lingering to brush a kiss to her neck and marvelling anew at the softness of her skin.
‘Tell me, Ruth.’ He felt a tremor ripple through her, and although he had yet to discover the cause of her anxiety, he sought to reassure her. ‘There is nothing you could say that would change what I think of you or the respect I have for you.’
Or what I feel for you, he wanted to add, but knew it was too much too soon for her to hear that. She was way too skittish. How could he explain the depths of his feelings to her when he didn’t understand them himself? If he told her about his father and Seb, about how they had met their soul mates and had known instantly it was right, would she believe he was sincere and that she was his? He believed, yet it sounded crazy even to him, so how could he expect Ruth to understand so soon?
Rico waited as dusk continued to roll in, wanting so much for Ruth to trust him. Silence stretched and he forced himself to be patient. Then he felt something wet drip onto his wrist. Dio! He turned her round and cupped her face, the fading light failing to hide the tears that shimmered in her incredible green eyes.
‘Ruth…Do not cry, sirena mia, I cannot bear it. Please, tell me what is wrong. Let me help.’
‘You can’t.’ The words whispered from her before she took a ragged breath. Then her voice strengthened. ‘I don’t understand what’s happening. I don’t do this.’ She sounded endearingly confused and flustered by something so strong and yet beyond her control. ‘I’m no good. Not a siren at all. You’ve made a mistake. I’ll just be a letdown to you.’
Her statement stunned him and was so absurd he wanted to laugh. But he didn’t because Ruth clearly believed what she had said. Despite being mature and supremely intelligent, a caring doctor who exuded professional competence, something was affecting her inner confidence as a woman. Something serious that he needed to understand and address.
‘I promise that you will never be a letdown, and most certainly not to me.’ He cuddled her close. ‘But why do you think this, Ruth? What—or who,’ he amended, recalling the fragmented clues he’d gleaned in the last two days, ‘makes you say it?’
For several moments he thought she was not going to speak, then she unconsciously pressed against him, her arms curling around his waist as she released a shaky sigh. He tightened his h
old, offering comfort and support.
‘I was at an all-girls’ boarding school until I was eighteen. It was OK but I was different and I didn’t have any real friends. Aside from swimming, my whole life revolved around study,’ she explained hesitantly. Rico slid one hand beneath her hair and caressed her neck, needing the contact as he waited for her to continue. ‘I went straight to medical school and again threw myself into learning—it’s what I enjoy, what I know. The socialising was new to me. I felt awkward, always on the outside. Everybody was pairing up. Adam was the only person to ask me out. I’m ashamed to say that I fell into a relationship with him partly because it was expected and partly because I so desperately wanted to fit in, to be accepted, to be like everyone else.’
A lump lodged in Rico’s throat. How alone Ruth must have felt, especially as she had not known any love at home or formed any close friendships at school. ‘There is nothing to be ashamed of, carissima,’ he corrected, hearing the emotion that roughened his voice as he tried to convince her that he understood.
‘At first Adam seemed pleased that I wasn’t “high maintenance”, as he called it, and needing attention. He liked playing football and drinking with his friends, while I appreciated having the space and the quiet so that I could study. Besides, I—’
Ruth abruptly stopped speaking and ducked her head, as if embarrassed. He slid his hand round from her nape to capture her chin and tilt her face back up. Her lashes lifted to reveal anxious green eyes. The last of the light was fading, but he made no attempt to move or return to the hotel, anxious not to break the mood now that Ruth was sharing something he knew was vitally important from her past.
‘You, what?’ he encouraged softly.
She bit her lip in indecision. ‘I never enjoyed the physical side of things,’ she whispered, her lashes lowering again to mask her expression.
Rico took a moment to compose himself. ‘Did he hurt you?’
‘No.’
The reply was too quick, and he held his breath, concerned at what she might yet reveal. ‘Ruth?’
‘He didn’t hurt me…not physically,’ she finally admitted, and he released the breath he’d been holding, although relief was tempered by the realisation that the man had harmed her in some other way.
‘What happened, sirena mia? What did he do?’
‘He resented that the study came easily to me, that I worked hard and passed exams with little apparent struggle. Adam barely scraped through them.’ She paused, resting her forehead on his shoulder. ‘When we went our separate ways, I vowed never to repeat the experience. Especially given what Adam said.’
A cold knot formed in Rico’s stomach. ‘What did he say?’ he prompted, one arm still locked around her, his free hand stroking the silken fall of her hair. A shudder ran through her. ‘Ruth…?’
Before he could prepare himself, she began speaking again. ‘Adam’s parting words were: “There is nothing remotely sexual, appealing or attractive about you, Ruth. You’re unresponsive, cold and frigid, and you don’t give me any pleasure. You might pass your exams with distinction, but you’re a total failure as a woman.” Then he left,’ she finished, with a strangled sound halfway between a laugh and a sob.
‘Bastardo.’
A furious rage rose inside him, completely out of character and at odds with his easygoing nature. Rico wanted to confront the man who had done this to Ruth. He hurt for her, imagining what a fatal blow it must have been to her already shaky self-esteem, especially when she had no other experiences to counterbalance the lies, and no one to whom she was close who could boost her confidence.
And in all the time since those words had been fired at her she had never allowed herself to get close to anyone and had believed the cruel and untrue things that man had said? Rico closed his eyes and cradled her against him, needing to keep her safe and protected. Ruth had shut herself off from love, believing she wasn’t good enough, thinking she was a failure as a woman. No wonder she had been thrown off balance by the electric connection and blaze of passion they had shared from the moment they had met.
It was a testament to how amazing Ruth was that she had come through her childhood with unloving parents, her years in a friendless boarding school, and then her experience with Adam, to emerge so grounded, so strong, still so caring and compassionate, and still with a sense of fun and an ability to set other people at ease, even in situations that made her uncomfortable. Admiration and love churned inside him. Rico planned to show her just how special and beautiful, attractive and arousing she was…and he wanted to reinforce that message every day for the rest of their lives.
He drew in an unsteady breath. Once again he was getting ahead of himself. The first step was to convince Ruth that everything Adam had said was nonsense. And the best way to do that was to take her to bed and prove just how sensual, sexy, feminine and wonderful she was, and just how much pleasure she could receive and give. He had one night to show her how magical things could be between them—one night to win her round to accept him in every way, professionally and personally.
Rico was silent for so long that Ruth began to worry that confiding in him had been a mistake. Not that she had told him everything. She remembered Adam’s verbal assault word for word, but she had not been able to voice aloud his sneering taunt about her inability to achieve an orgasm. For a moment she closed her eyes, reliving the humiliation of their final moments together.
Pushing the memories aside, she leaned against Rico and wondered what he was thinking. Would he reject her now that he knew she was a failure? What was it about this man that stripped away her defences and had her telling him things she had never told another living soul? It had been happening from the first moment they had met. In two days he knew more about her life, her past, her dreams and her insecurities than anyone else. And no matter what she had told him, he had never wavered, had never laughed at her, and had not given the slightest sign that he thought any less of her. Quite the opposite, in fact. He gave her his undivided attention, he listened as if what she said mattered and was important to him, and he made her feel valued and respected.
He also made her feel safe and yet in terrible danger. Like now—cocooned in his embrace. She welcomed his comfort and strength, was soothed by his steady heartbeat and his cedar-wood scent. Yet all the time she was aware of the charged awareness and the ache of want that never went away. Ruth sighed, relaxing into him. It was far too comfortable being right there in his arms with him holding her as if he would never let her go.
After an endless time he drew back, and she felt the loss as his arms released her. But then his hands cupped her face, his expression impossible to read in the gathering darkness. He moved closer until his lips brushed hers, teasing and tantalising for a breathtaking moment until her own parted and he deepened the kiss. Reality was swept away as the passion ignited, and Ruth clung to him, lost in the firestorm, matching his demands, making her own, savouring his taste as his tongue invaded and invited hers to duel and dance. He nibbled and sucked on each lip in turn, then drew her tongue into the moist heat of his mouth.
She moaned in protest as the unexpected but fiercely erotic kiss ended far too soon, thankful for the arm around her waist as her legs were far too weak and wobbly to support her on their own. Her heart thundered in her chest and it was an effort to pull each breath into her lungs.
‘You believe you are unresponsive when we kiss?’ Rico demanded, his sexy, accented voice husky and rough. One hand fisted in her hair, keeping her gaze locked with his. ‘You believe you do not feel pleasure yourself or give pleasure to me?’ Ruth gasped as his other hand shaped the swell of her rear and pulled her closer, his hips rocking against hers so that she felt his undeniable arousal. ‘You believe I don’t want and desire you, that I don’t find you sexy and attractive, sirena mia? What of the way we both explode with the intensity of the passion we share?’
‘Rico…’ She was so stunned and breathless that she could barely force out his name, let
alone form a coherent sentence.
Her whole body was trembling as he took her hand in his and led her back along the woodland path, the lights of the hotel a beacon in the darkness. She was too bemused and nervous to ask where they were going. Neither of them spoke as they crossed the deserted foyer, and neither paid any attention to the hum of chatter and laughter coming from the restaurant and bar. Bypassing the lift, their footsteps whispered up the richly carpeted main stairway. Ruth’s fingers tightened on Rico’s as they ignored the floor that housed her room and climbed two more flights before he opened a door and they moved onto a quiet landing. Near the end of the corridor a turn led to a solitary suite. Rico released her hand, unlocked the door and stepped inside before turning back to face her, his gaze intent, his voice serious.
‘Tomorrow the world will intrude again. You will have to return to your surgery, and I have some family commitments I cannot ignore before I can return to Italy. Tomorrow we can exchange addresses and arrange a time—hopefully very soon—for you to come to Florence, to look around the clinic and talk about the job.’ He paused, looking uncharacteristically nervous, and Ruth held her breath. When he continued, his voice was smoky and rough and sent tingles down her spine. ‘Tonight is ours alone. Give me this time to show you how magical it will be for us, to prove to you that everything that cowardly and jealous man said to you was a lie, and to convince you that you are an exciting, desirable and sensual woman…beautiful and sexy and never a letdown. What do you say, sirena mia?’
In the silence that followed, Ruth could hear every thud of her heart, and she struggled to remember how to breathe. She met the intensity of Rico’s gaze as he waited for her to make a decision. Should she play safe and go? Or stay—and face a night beyond her wildest imaginings?
Italian Doctor, Dream Proposal / Wanted: A Father for her Twins Page 8