After pure lovely seconds of feeling better than I ever have before, my body finally releases all its tension, becoming boneless on Joe. I’m panting and lean my head down on his strong shoulder, my arms wrapping around him. He instantly holds me gently, carefully. He’s breathing is heavy too. Our sweat mingles.
“That was so good.”
I nod against him.
“I’ve never…it’s never felt like that.”
“Me either.”
“We’re going to do it a lot, right?”
I chuckle.
“I might be a pest about it, because that was so good.”
I lean back and look at him. “It was so good. Like…” I look down, not sure if I can tell him, feeling shy about my feelings.
“Like what?” He tilts my chin up with one of his fingers.
“Like I’ve never had sex before.”
He smiles. “For me too.” Then he tilts his head to the side, wincing slightly. “In fact, I might want to again. Right now.”
He does, somehow, still feel hard inside me.
I arch a brow. “Impressive.”
He softly chuckles. “You might not think that after I badger you for sex twenty times tonight. And, ah, you wouldn’t happen to have more condoms? That was the only one I had.”
I nod, trying to hold back from giggling. “Your mother bought me a huge box of them.”
He winces, and I realize what I’ve said, who I’ve forgotten this whole time.
“I mean—” I don’t know why I’m explaining myself, but I am. “Your mother bought them for me because she thought I should start dating again, have sex. I’m making it worse by talking about it, aren’t I?”
He chuckles yet again. “It’s just…I’m still inside you and you’re talking about my mom. It’s a little weird.”
“I’m sorry.”
He shrugs, which feels incredible. “Well, you can report back to her that you started using those condoms, right?”
Only, I can’t. Because I’m using those condoms on her son.
Oh god, what have I done?
8
I wake because I’m being bodily moved. And not because a three-year-old little girl is bouncing on me. I’m being held in strong arms, a heavy leg in between mine, and whiskers at the top of my head. There’s also a huge erection pressed into my back. God, I haven’t woken to one of those in so long, and it instantly brings a smile to my face.
However, in the light of day, things seem different. As I blink awake, I’m amazed at all the condom wrappers everywhere on my bed. After the kitchen, we had sex in the hallway, in the shower, then against the wall of my bedroom, and managed to even have sex a few times in my bed. I’m stiff and sore everywhere. We were both insatiable, needing each other until we passed out.
I had sex multiple times with my best friend’s son. I swallow, really thinking about the ramifications. Eva might be angry. Furious. How would I feel if Jamie grew up and had sex with my best friend? Well, by the time Jamie’s a man, Eva will be close to eighty, so I don’t think that will happen. It’s hard to know how I’d feel. What if I found a new friend, someone like me, when Jamie’s a man, and they had sex? A predatory fury growls internally when thinking about it. Yeah, I’d be angry.
But what if that woman made my little Jamie happy?
I might be more understanding.
But just how understanding is Eva right now?
And, crap, how is she after she fell asleep drunk and crying?
Joe rocks his hardness against me. “Good morning.”
I grin and turn around in his arms, forgetting everything, like I usually do the second Joe starts talking. “Good morning.”
His eyes are still closed, but he’s smiling.
I graze my fingers along his whiskered cheek, amazed by the gold in his beard. The sun is glinting off his messy hair and whiskers. His leg slides between mine again, and he pulls me closer, his erection jutting into my stomach.
“This is so perfect.”
“Is it?” I ask.
He nods. God, I love his voice in the morning. It’s so deep, dreamy.
“Can I stay in your bed forever?”
I laugh.
“Seriously.” He opens one gray eye, taking me in. “I want to stay here for the next few decades. I don’t even want to move.”
“I’ll make you breakfast in bed then.”
He pulls me closer. “Fuck, you’re good to me.”
“I haven’t even made you breakfast yet. What do you like?”
“I like everything.” He nips at my neck. “I like you most of all.”
I giggle, pushing his biting teeth away. “You like oatmeal? I make a mean oatmeal.”
He silently chuckles. “I haven’t had oatmeal…I can’t even remember when.”
“Then you’re due.” I try to sit up, my silver cotton covers sliding off my bare body, but he yanks me down and before I can even sigh, he’s on top of me, between my legs, pinning my arms over my head.
“Not just yet.”
I huff to catch my breath.
“Last night, when we had sex, it was your turn…a lot.”
I nod, suddenly feeling flushed, my sex instantly warm and liquid for him. “Yes, it was. I don’t think you had a turn once.”
“Mine.” He leans down and bites my lobe. “Right now.”
“You want a turn right now?” I lick his neck. “Is that what you mean, caveman?”
He grunts at the same time his hips push forward, his erection sliding along my already wet pussy.
I moan and open my legs even more. “Me like my caveman.”
He chuckles. “Cavewomen, come for me.”
I grunt like he did and roll my hips upward.
He slides his cock up and down my sex, circling it around my clit, making me close my eyes. Up and down, again and again, until his cock is caught by my opening. I look up at him. He’s straining, looking down at where we’re almost joined. So I do too. I’m a little amazed I somehow can handle his cock. I am sore. But no matter how sore I am, I want to have sex again. With huge Joe.
He pushes himself a little inside me.
“Condom,” I whisper.
He looks up at me. “You on birth control?”
I shake my head.
He winces, holding himself very still, looking down at his cock just a little bit inside me. “But I don’t want a condom on. You feel so fucking good.”
I wrap a hand around his neck. “You feel good too, but there are consequences to what you’re doing.”
He glances up again. “Is that such a bad thing?”
I blink, not sure if he realizes he’s saying getting me pregnant isn’t a bad thing.
Knock, knock, knock.
He pulls out, groaning and rolling to his back beside me. “I’m going to fucking kill whoever that is.”
I swallow, sitting up, my heart beating behind my eyes. “It’s your mom.” I look down at him.
He’s still so hard, his cock pressed up against his belly, but he slits one eye, warily glancing at me. “Why would she be here?”
I stand then sit, anxiety making me flighty and weird. “She knows.” I look at him. “She can’t know.”
“You mean about us? Why not?”
“She’ll kill me.”
Joe rolls his eyes. “No, she won’t.”
Knock, knock, knock.
I look out the open door of my bedroom then back at Joe. “Just tell her we talked all night.”
“What? No.”
“Please. Tell her you feel asleep on the couch. We just talked.”
“Why?”
Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock, knock. Knock.
I glance again out the door then panic when I check on Joe. “Please.”
He sighs and shakes his head. “I’m not—you’re not ready to tell people about us?”
“Yes. I’m not ready.”
“Are you embarrassed of me?”
I rush to him. “No, I
—” with my heart beating so hard and I’m panicking, I don’t know how to tell him that his mother is my one friend and I’m so lonely I don’t want to do anything to fuck that up. Even if I did already fuck it up by fucking him.
Joe shakes his head again. “Fine.” Then he snatches me by the wrist, pulling me close. “But know this. I’m ready to tell the whole goddamned world about us. I’m going to shout it to everyone I know soon. But if you’re not ready yet, then…yeah. I’ll shut up about us. But not for long.”
I kiss him and run for my bathrobe. After snagging it, I put it on while I run through my house, calling, “Coming.”
At the door, I realize how romantic Joe is, saying he won’t wait long to tell people about us. Silly, impetuous Joe. God, what is he going to tell people about us?
Making sure my robe is covering me, I open the door with a huge smile.
“It’s about fucking time.” It’s Bit, dressed in all black on a summer morning where it’s already approaching ninety degrees, and smoking a cigarette, squinting at me suspiciously. Yep, that’s my brand new sponsor, my own Girl with a Dragon Tattoo, on my front step. “Did you drink last night? Are you hung over?”
I purse my lips. “No, I didn’t drink.” I hiss, defensively.
She sighs, as if she was genuinely worried, which touches my heart. “You said the party would be hard to get through. You’ve always drank before. I told you to call me, but you didn’t. I just—”
Maybe it’s because of having multiple orgasms last night. But I’m feeling sentimental and rush to Bit, embracing her. She’s pushing me away like I have contagious hives, which makes me laugh as I lean back.
“Thanks for thinking of me.”
“It’s what I’m supposed to do.”
Something loud crashes in my kitchen.
Bit looks over my shoulder, even though she can’t see through walls. “Did you get your kids back early?”
I shake my head. God, I told her so much about myself without even knowing I had. That’s when I realize how comfortable I am with Bit. How much I like her.
There’s another clang as Joe’s obviously being as noisy as possible. He might have promised he’d shut up about us, that didn’t mean he’d be quiet about anything else, though.
Bit’s bright blue eyes focus on me with laser-like accuracy. Slowly, her pale lips stretch wide with a smile. “You got laid last night.”
I sigh loudly.
She points a finger at my face. “You didn’t get drunk to hook up with someone?”
I shake my head. “I didn’t have one drink.”
Her smile widens all the more. “But you did get laid.” She purses her lips. “You know starting a relationship so soon in the program isn’t a good idea.” No matter what she just said, she resumes smiling then shrugs. “Ah, I won’t tell.”
“Tell what?”
I look over my shoulder to Joe who’s barged into this conversation, and who isn’t trying to hide like I hoped he would. He did put on jeans, but the fact that the top button isn’t done up, that his jeans are hanging off his narrow hips in a suggestive way means he was going to give rather huge hints that we hadn’t just been talking on the couch last night.
He laughs as he comes behind me, wrapping an arm around my waist. “Well, look who it is.”
Bit’s smile is huge. “Joseph Fucking Whitaker.”
“How sweet.” Joe pulls me closer. “Elizabeth Smith, class valedictorian, remembers my middle name.”
Of course they know each other. Yeesh, this is a small town. But to have gone to school together too? What are the odds?
Bit laughs. Actually laughs. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her do anything so jovial. Then they hug, Joe picking her up off the ground and swinging her thin legs in her black and white stripped tights in the air. After setting her down on the ground, he says, “How the hell are you? Get your bony ass inside and tell me what you’ve been up to. Moira and I were going to eat oatmeal.”
“Oatmeal?” Bit laughs as she walks past me and into my house.
I’m not sure what’s happening other than Joe’s acting possessive, like he owns me and my house. Or maybe this is part of his cocky swagger that got me to keep looking at him last night. I don’t know. And the crazy part is, I like it.
They’re already in my kitchen when I catch up.
“I can’t believe you’re still in town.” Joe’s got a pot out and is looking at the directions of the huge oatmeal bin. “Moira? Where’s the measuring cups?”
I’m amazed he’d found the oatmeal and the pot and point over his shoulder.
He extracts my red measuring cups and resumes talking. “I thought you went to Harvard.” He wags his dark blond brows a few times with a teasing grin.
“I did,” Bit says, glancing at me with a slightly worried expression. “Moira knows this part. I got drunk. High. A lot. Went to rehab. Came back home.”
Joe turns. His smile gone. He puts his hand on one of hers that’s on the kitchen island. “I’m sorry.” His voice is somber yet sweet. “Anything I can do?”
“Never offer me a drink.”
“Got it.” He sneaks in another grin. “But you’re good with oatmeal?”
Bit laughs. “I’m good with oatmeal.” She tilts her head to the side. “I heard you joined the Army right out of high school.”
He nods. “Yep.”
Bit laughs wryly. “So you obviously like talking about that.”
He shrugs, his smile fading somewhat.
It’s then that it hits me how he’d told me a little about his time in the military, but he’s not saying anything to one of his former classmates. Joe trusts me. And my heart shifts gears and starts thundering in my chest.
“When did you get back?”
Joe leans against the counter with his hip, crossing his ankles, looking at ease in my house with his bare chest and feet. “Yesterday.”
Bit looks at me then back to Joe. “And already fucked Moira. That’s fast even for you.”
Joe’s smile falls away completely then. “It’s not—I’m not like that anymore.”
There’s warning bells ringing through my head. I don’t know what Bit’s talking about, but I can assume it means that Joe has a past with women. A past I probably wouldn’t like to know about.
Further, since Bit seems so blasé about sharing personal information, I’m wondering when she’s going to spill that she’s my sponsor. Yes, AA is known for their confidentiality, but that doesn’t mean Bit abides by it.
Joe grabs my wrist, pulling me near him, but he’s looking at Bit. “Moira’s my girl now.”
“Yeah? Just like that?” Bit asks.
Then it hits me, the way Bit’s looking at Joe, she’s defensive. For me. That jab at Joe was on purpose, not necessarily to fill me in on what kind of guy she knows him to be, but also to try to get a rise from Joe, to make his intentions known.
Well, I think. I could be wrong about her, but I think, like Joe, she’s a tiny bit of a mind reader. She already sees through all my bullshit. And she might genuinely care for me anyway.
I might have one other friend in this world, and my heart pinches at the thought.
“Have you seen Moira, Bit?” Joe’s voice is lowered, a tad more serious. “Do you know her? Of course, just like that she’s my girl. I’d be crazy or seriously stupid not to snatch her up this fast.”
Bit gives him a begrudging smile. “You better be good to her is all I’m saying.”
Joe hugs me, his jaw on the top of my head. “How did you two meet?”
Bit shrugs. “It’s a small town, Joseph. You remember that.”
There’s my proof. I think she would die before she told anyone she’s my sponsor. Further, I think her loyalty is with me, even if she does have a history with Joe. Something about that, makes me like Bit, prickly little Goth girl that she is, with an intense warmth in my chest and stomach.
Joe shrugs against me. “Well, it makes sense you two would become friends.
Two of the most authentic people in town.”
Bit shakes her head. “No matter what you do, Joe, you always win me over. You were a jock, and I should have hated you.”
“But where’s the fun in that?”
“Your little jock buddies hated my crowd of friends. Did some pretty mean things.”
“They’re idiots. You know that.”
“You going to get in touch with them now that you’re back?”
Joe turns me slightly, my back to his front, holding me close by wrapping his arms around my waist. “Nah. Just going to hang out with Moira. And now you.”
Bit looks up at the ceiling. “You’ve changed.”
“I hope so.” He sips in a breath. “You seem the same.”
She tilts her chin out. “I’m a flaming lesbian now.”
“Awesome.” He holds me even closer. “What does it take to be flaming?”
A faint pink laces through her white cheeks. “Oh, you know. It’s kind of the opposite of being a gay man. I wear combat boots sometimes. Try to make my voice deeper. Spit a lot. Use all the opposite stereotypes I can think of.”
“Nice.”
I really like Bit and Joe’s easy, sarcastic conversation. And I had no idea Bit was gay.
“Do you have a girlfriend?” I ask.
Joe turns me so he can look down at my face. “Ah, she does speak.”
I roll my eyes. “It’s hard to get a word in edgewise with you two.”
Joe kisses me quickly on the lips. “Gotta be fast, baby.” Then he glances up at Bit. “But that is an excellent, very intrusive question. Got a girlfriend?”
Bit bites her lip, looking down, the pink in her cheeks growing deeper. “I—I like someone.”
Joe squeezes me harder. “Oh, let’s help Bit get her girl.”
I laugh.
Bit rolls her eyes while she points a finger at Joe. “Don’t you dare. It’s—it’s complicated. I work with her. I don’t even know if she’s gay. So lay off.”
“I don’t think I can.”
I glance up at Joe and his wide smile.
She points even more at him. “You’d better.”
Joe shakes his head, which I can’t see but can feel against me. “Nope. See, I’m all sappy now that I have Moira, and I kind of want the whole world to be sappy too.”
Awake: Book 3 of the Wild Love Series Page 8