by JB Salsbury
Caleb takes me in his arms and holds me. “You are not stupid. Just take this as a lesson learned.”
Jonah and Blake come inside, shaking their heads.
“Did you see anything?” I ask from the safety of Caleb’s chest.
“Nothing. Sorry, Honor.” Jonah still looks like he’s ready to rip something apart.
“Come on. Let’s go pack.” Caleb leads me back to my room. “You’re staying with me from here on out.”
Thirteen
Caleb
Three days and they still have no leads on who was in Honor’s house. There were no witnesses, no cars, and weirdest of all . . . nothing missing.
Axel’s team came in and did their own investigation, which included Hope Town police officer Liam Beckett, Beck’s son. He made sure to keep the situation low profile to avoid media attention and reporters crawling straight up our assholes.
It seemed to be a random hit. My guess is one of the paps was out looking for information on Honor and couldn’t find anything so thought trashing her house would be a story. The only problem with that theory is where the fuck is the story?
I’ve done my best to keep Honor off the Internet, but I skimmed it myself, and other than the trash about Honor’s family, there’s nothing about a break-in.
So what now?
“. . . from the airport to the venue.”
“Right.” I don’t know what the fuck Cam’s saying. Somewhere between “Hello” and now I got lost in my head.
“Great, then the hookers will be there in time to suck you off before your fight.”
“Huh?”
“Oh, now you hear me.” His voice is a low growl, the telltale sign that he’s losing what little patience he was cursed with.
“I heard enough to know I’ll see you tomorrow morning in Atlanta.”
“Good enough,” he mumbles. “Get some sleep, Caleb. Tomorrow you make history.”
“Will do—”
He hangs up on me, and I shake my head, staring out the window at Honor, who is absently picking at a turkey sandwich and using it to feed the birds and squirrels that surround her.
She hasn’t been the same since that night. She’s closed off. Quiet. It’s as if she’s retreated into herself, and I can’t figure out how to get her back.
She’s scared, you idiot!
She went from living her safe little life of unlocked doors and predictability to having everyone after her. All because of me. I’ve been trying to reassure her that I’ll never let anything happen to her, that I’d kill anyone who tried, but nothing I say penetrates.
I drop my phone on the counter and open the sliding glass door. Jonah and Blake went into town, hoping to stir up some media attention and get their focus off this house. In the short time they’ve known Honor, they’ve fallen in love with her too. Not in the same way I have, but in a platonic—hold on.
Love?
I’ve fallen in love with Honor.
Just as the words filter through, my heart jackhammers behind my ribs.
I have. I think I always knew I would. Ever since that day fourteen years ago, I knew she was the type of woman I could fall for, and seeing her again proved it to be true.
“Caleb? What is it?” She’s looking up at me with those searching blue eyes as her hair blows around her face in the light breeze.
“Oh, uh . . . I was just thinking . . .” I pull out the chair beside her and move hers so that she’s facing me. We’re close enough that her knees touch the inside of mine. With my elbows on my thighs, I hold her hands.
She seems worried, like I’m about to drop some bad news.
She couldn’t be more wrong.
“What?”
“Honor.” I look down at our joined hands, my big fingers rubbing the length of her much smaller ones. “I know this might seem crazy, but . . .” I peer up at her; our gazes tangle together. “I love you.”
She blinks. For a few pregnant seconds, that’s all she does.
I shift in my seat with the sudden urge to flee but force myself to stay still.
“No, you don’t.” Those words fall from her lips on a whisper, and I wonder if she meant to say them out loud.
“Yes, I do.” I can’t fight the grin that takes over my face because nothing I’ve ever said before has felt so true. “I’m in love with you. I think . . . Somehow, I think I always have been.”
“How . . .?” She still seems stunned.
Is she asking how I know, or how I’ve always known? Either way, she’s had two opportunities to say it back and didn’t.
It’s rare that I ever feel insecure or exposed. I can think of maybe two, three times top in my entire life.
This is one of those times.
“How? Um . . .” I look out at the lake and find it holds no answers. “How do I know the snow is cold? The sun is hot? Water is wet? I feel it. That’s how.”
“Oh.” She stares at her lap.
Dread slows my racing heart, and I try to talk myself down from feeling completely rejected by rationalizing why she wouldn’t be feeling the same thing for me. Maybe it’s too soon. She’s felt abandoned and betrayed by the people in the world who were supposed to love her the most. It would make sense, I guess, that she wouldn’t buy what I’m saying at face value.
“Right.” I kiss her knuckles and reluctantly let go of her hands. It seems like what she might need right now is space. My timing was off. I should’ve waited until all this shit with my fight and her house was over. “I, uh . . . I’ll be leaving early tomorrow to go to Atlanta. I’ll have a ton of shit going on, and Jonah and Blake will be with me—”
“That’s fine. I need to go back to my place and clean up. I’ll just meet you at the fight. It starts at eight, so if I leave—”
“Honor.”
“Hm?” She blinks up at me, and I swear there are tears in her eyes.
“Cohen will pick you up and bring you to me. He has the security clearance to get you in. He’ll pick you up at five, okay?”
“Oh, sure.” She nods. “Okay.”
“Babe, come here.” I can’t stand the distance I feel between us, even as we’re sitting so close. I tug her to her feet and bring her to my lap, cradling her to my chest. “In just over twenty-four hours, this’ll all be over. Please, tell me you can hold on just a little longer.”
She’s stiff in my arms, but then nuzzles in close and nods.
“Yeah? Good.” I squeeze her tighter. “I need to go for a run in a little bit here; then it’ll be an early dinner and bed for me. I know you’re going through some shit in your head, and I want to help you through that, but you won’t open up to me.”
“I’m fine, Caleb.” She pushes off my chest and forces a shaky smile.
As beautiful as she is when she’s happy, she’s just as gorgeous when she’s not.
I cup her jaw and run my thumb along her cheekbone. “Why don’t you go relax, watch a movie, take a nap, read, whatever you want. I’ll make us dinner tonight.”
The corner of her mouth ticks up. “Peanut butter and jelly?”
“No. Believe it or not, I can actually make spaghetti too.” I press my lips to hers and feel the tension in her muscles slowly leave.
“Thank you for being so good to me,” she says against my lips. “I can help you cook, though.”
“Alright, babe. We’ll do it together.”
I’m not only talking about dinner, but life and our future.
Whatever comes next, I want to do it with Honor.
~*~
Honor
I’m flopped on the couch, pretending to watch TV and hoping Caleb buys it.
He told me he loves me. Or more accurately, he told me he was in love with me.
Me.
The insignificant Bug.
From the first morning I saw him stumble downstairs wearing nothing but a pair of shorts, he’s treated me with respect. Through training and promoting his fight, he’s always made sure to include me, make time for m
e. And even though the sex between us is off-the-charts amazing, he’s never made me feel like that’s all this is.
He loves me.
And I know he does, not because he says it, but because I feel it.
It’s in the way he touches me, keeps his eyes on me even when someone else is vying for his attention. It’s how he listens when I talk about things that don’t really matter as if my next words could be life-altering. He smiles when I smile, so in tune with what I’m feeling he can’t help but catch it. It’s in the way his expression grows serious when I laugh as if he’s hearing the sound for the first time. It is in everything he does with, around, and for me.
It’s time I start showing him I love him back.
Because words are only letters strung together, anyone can say they love another person. Caleb deserves more.
The couch dips as Caleb sits at my hip, having come back down from upstairs while I’m lost in my thoughts. He’s wearing the board shorts, no shirt, and his running shoes. His dark blond hair is tucked beneath a black baseball hat, and he has his earbuds in his hand. “I’ll be gone about an hour.”
An hour is all I need. “Alright.”
“Don’t get dinner started until I’m back. I’m serious about cooking tonight.”
“I won’t.” I have other plans.
“One of Axel’s guys is out front. Blake and Jonah should be back around the same time I am.”
“I’ll be okay by myself, Caleb. You don’t need to worry.”
He leans in and presses a warm kiss to my forehead. “I’ll always be worried about you, baby.”
No need. As soon as you leave, I’m taking my life back. “Be safe.”
He nuzzles my neck. “Always.”
He pushes up off the couch and out through the backdoor, most likely headed to the path that runs along the lake. I count to one hundred before I grab my phone and punch out a quick text.
I need to see you right now. It’s an emergency. Meet me at the old fort.
I hit send and wait anxiously for a response. My phone pings.
Be there in five.
I slip on my sneakers and move as stealthily as I can to the back porch. Casually strolling to the steps, I make sure security isn’t in the middle of one of their perimeter checks. Once I’m convinced I’m in the clear, I duck into the trees and head to a part of the wooded area that is still undeveloped. My feet crunch on dead pine needles and dirt as I move through the forest and rustle up some courage.
I rehearse my speech in my head and allow Caleb’s love to fuel me as I fight against my instinct to submit. Cower. Be the victim.
The old fort comes into view. What was once a decent structure made from wood and hand-driven nails is now just a couple of leaning walls and a fallen-branch roof. This was where the local kids would play make-believe games, and later as they grew up, it became a hang out to smoke or drink or do whatever else no one wanted their parents knowing about. I was welcome here as a child, but as I got older, my awkwardness made me a target, so I kept to the trees, watching and pretending I was part of the crowd.
Shrouded by tree cover, this spot doesn’t get any sun. It’s secluded and a little eerie as I remember the times I’d been bullied, pushed down, and forced to eat dirt at the hands of other kids.
Minutes stretch into more minutes when I hear footsteps approaching.
“Bug? It’s not like you to want to meet so privately.” Roy’s tall frame comes through the trees. “If you want to make out, I can think of a thousand better places to do that than here.”
My skin crawls at the thought, but I keep my chin high and my shoulders back. “It was you.”
His brows pop up above his dark eyes. “It’s always been me, baby.”
I close my eyes and gather all my courage. “Roy, stop fucking around. I know it was you who trashed my house.”
“My house. Not yours.”
“So, you admit it.”
He shrugs one shoulder and crosses to lean against a tree. “I’m not admitting shit. I’m just clarifying that the house you call yours is most definitely not. It’s mine.”
“Why did you do it? What were you looking for?”
“Is this why you called me out here? Because I’ve got better things to do than run in circles with you, Bug.”
“Honor. My name is Honor.”
“Well . . .” He plucks a rock from the ground. “I think we’re done here.” He tosses it in the air and catches it.
Adrenaline floods my veins, thinking he might throw it at me, but we aren’t kids anymore, and although Roy still manages to find ways to fuck with me, I can’t imagine he’d resort to throwing rocks the way he did when he was ten.
“We’re not done. I called you out here to tell you that I quit.”
His gaze moves slowly from the rock in his hand to me, his eyes tight slits. “Excuse me?”
“I quit. I don’t work for you anymore. You’ve been hanging my granddaddy’s house over my head since he died, and no matter how hard I work to earn enough to buy the house back, it’ll never be enough.”
The first flash of worry crosses his features, and I know then I’m right. Pretending that I could ever work hard enough to get my house back was just another one of his lies. Just another form of bullying. He liked having me under his thumb just as he did when we were kids. He’d barked, “jump,” and I’d say, “how high?”
God, how could I have been so stupid?
I had no other choice, that’s how.
High school education, no job experience at seventeen, and then Granddad got sick and I couldn’t leave him alone. He died and left me in debt up to my ears, but Roy swooped in and took care of all that. I thought he’d saved me when this entire time he only meant to torture me.
“You can’t quit.” He moves toward me, and the predatory look in his eyes has me stepping back. “You quit, you become homeless.”
“I know.” Caleb said we’d figure it out after his fight. It feels like I’m jumping from dependence on one man to dependence on another, and that makes me cringe, but what other choice do I have? I have no friends. No family.
I am alone.
You’ve got me.
Caleb’s words ring through my head.
“You think that hot shot Dean is going to have your back the way I did?” His face reddens. “I got news for you, sweetheart. You’re nothing more than an easy lay to Caleb. You’re a vacation fuck. Whatever bullshit lines he’s feeding you are just that, bullshit. As soon as his fight is over, he’ll go back to his life where women a lot better than you throw themselves at his feet. Supermodels, actresses, educated women who smell like expensive perfume and wear nice clothes, that’s the type he’ll end up with. Not you. So, before you do anything rash, why don’t you pull your head out of your ass and be logical here.”
Oh God, he’s just verified all my worst fears, given my insecurities a voice.
How do I know the snow is cold? The sun is hot? Water is wet? I feel it.
I hear Roy’s words, but I feel Caleb’s truth.
“Nothing you say will change my mind.” My voice shakes, and I hope he doesn’t pick up on it.
He blows out a long breath and shakes his head. “Alright, Bug. You want to shove away the hand that’s been feeding you, fine by me.” He throws the rock, and I flinch as it whizzes by my head, making him laugh. “Good luck being on your own. When you’re starving and cold and need a place to stay . . .” He gets close and brushes his knuckles along my cheek. “My bed is always open to you. We could”—his gaze tracks down my neck to settle on my breasts— “figure out a trade. You give me what I want; I’ll give you what you need.”
“Fuck you.”
A slow smile curls his lips. “Among other things.” He winks.
“Good-bye, Roy.”
He tilts his head. “You’ll be back.”
I turn on shaky legs and head back to the house. Part of me expects to feel the shove between my shoulders that will send me face-fi
rst to the ground. I get away quickly and stumble a few times in my hurry back to Caleb’s. I check for security at the tree line then dart to the porch and inside unnoticed.
“Jonah? Blake?” I call from the kitchen but get no answer.
I did it.
I took control of my life for the first time in . . . forever.
I’m putting all my faith in what I feel for Caleb.
I just hope I’m not wrong.
~~~
“Shhh . . . they’ll hear you.” Caleb flashes me a cocky grin as he kisses a path between my breasts.
“I’m trying.” I giggle and squirm beneath him. “It tickles.”
He bites my hip then soothes it with his tongue. “This is nothing compared to what’s coming.” He dips between my thighs; his wide shoulders force my legs further apart.
I felt so relieved when I got back from talking to Roy, as if I left the weight of the last ten years back there in the trees. When Caleb came home from his run, he was sweat-soaked, but I didn’t care. I jumped into his arms, wrapped my legs around him, and kissed him senseless. He didn’t have to say anything. I could tell by his expression that he’d been worried about me, but in that moment, I watched all the worry melt away.
He, Jonah, and Blake whipped up a steaming pot of spaghetti and meatballs. Blake, as it turns out, knows his way around a kitchen, and we laughed over dinner as if we’d all known each other for years.
Caleb and I couldn’t keep our hands off each other while cleaning up, which led to Jonah ushering us to the stairs, saying we were both sent to Caleb’s room to “get that shit out of his system before the fight.”
Which leads us to now.
I’m flat on my back with Caleb’s mouth doing delicious things between my legs.
He hums against my sensitive flesh. “So good. I could eat you all day.”
His words stroke my desire, sending my mind to enticing fantasies of doing the same to him. As he alternates between long languid swipes of his tongue and deep penetrating plunges inside, I’m crawling out of my skin to get more of him.