Ruthless Heart

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by Eve L Mitchell


  As I dropped down beside her, Ava wordlessly stared at me before her eyes darted around the room. “What are you doing?”

  Pointing at the large white screen in front of the room, I told her, “Learning.”

  “Why are you beside me?” Ava demanded quietly. Her eyes kept flicking to the door.

  “Do you want me to move?”

  “Yes!”

  Turning, I looked at her, and she sat back, her head dropping to break the eye contact. “Excuse me?”

  “This professor thinks I’m already a team bunny. You sitting beside me is only going to condemn me further.”

  “What the fuck is a team bunny?” I asked her in amusement.

  “Jett!” Ava’s eyes were wide with pleading.

  “You want me to move?” I asked again, and when she nodded too enthusiastically for my liking, I stood.

  Her relief was palpable, and I bent over her, my lips on her ear. “You can thank me for this later, on your knees, rabbit.”

  I was laughing as I made my way up the stairs to the back row. Now that I knew where she was in the class, I had no idea why I hadn’t noticed her before. Her face was red from embarrassment, and when the dude who had given her grief last week started on her again, I took special note of who he was.

  Five minutes into his shit and Ava was on her feet. This time, she didn’t confront him but merely packed her books and climbed the stairs. I watched her silently as she took the empty seat beside me. When she eventually made eye contact, she gave a slight shrug.

  “Better the devil you know,” she murmured as the lights dimmed and the professor started class.

  The darkness hid my smile.

  The week passed quickly, and although I saw her once or twice on campus, she didn’t seek me out, nor I her.

  But she was all I could think about.

  Ash had her in one class, and at dinner on Thursday night, he commented that their professor seemed to hold a personal vendetta against her. As he ate his chicken and spaghetti, he shook his head. “You can see he intimidates her, but every time he picks on her, she answers.” He shovelled his food into his mouth. “You gotta admire her spunk.”

  Gray grunted but said nothing.

  “What is it?” I asked him as I ate my own dinner, carefully pushing the asparagus to the side. I growled when my brother reached over and pushed it back into my food.

  “Eat your greens,” he told me.

  “Fuck you. I hate asparagus.”

  “Eat it,” both he and Ash told me.

  “It tastes like fucking feet,” I muttered, biting into the spear on my fork and forcing myself to chew and swallow.

  “Why would you know what feet taste like?” Ash asked with a quick grin to Gray, who huffed out a laugh.

  “You ain’t been laid in over a week,” Gray said slyly. “You been tamed?”

  Ash snickered as he drank his water. “You caught the feelings?” he mocked me.

  “You’re both assholes,” I said to them as I kept my eyes on my food.

  “This will help,” Gray said as he pushed his phone across the table at me.

  I stared at it and then looked at both him and my cousin. “What the fuck is this?”

  “Told you before,” Gray said as he ate more of his supper. “Motive.”

  “It could be nothing,” Ash said quietly. Gray huffed in contempt, and I studied the phone again.

  “She played us?” I asked. “All of us? We already settled this.”

  “Wasn’t Coach who questioned her,” Gray said. “Izzy’s soft.” He looked over at Ash. “She’s given him more hand jobs than he can count.”

  Ash swatted the back of Gray’s head. “Hey, she massages the ache. It’s for medicinal purposes.”

  Gray rolled his eyes as he finished his dinner. He took the phone off me as he stood. “Don’t lose sight of the bigger picture,” he reminded me as he took his plate to the sink.

  I opened my own Instagram and looked at the pic and the caption. Dante Spence had posted a pic of a blonde girl, her face turned away from the camera, wearing a Lions shirt, and the caption read objects of my desire with the hashtag Uptightkickedyourass.

  It was hard to tell if it was Ava, but the message was clear, Spence was making a move on her.

  I remembered her red-haired friend challenging him when he said he wanted to talk to Ava. The friend knew immediately he had no intention of being there for Ava until I was in the same space as her. When she demanded he tell Ava he knew her name, his epic fail had been funny as fuck to witness, but I had registered the brief look of hurt on Ava’s face.

  It was one of the reasons I went to see her later. I had no intention of putting my lips on her body, any part of her body, nor did I expect her to wrap her perfect lips around any part of mine.

  When I was in the same room with her, sometimes I forgot what my goal was, and I ended up either kissing her or playing with her sweet body.

  “What you going to do?” Ash asked me quietly as he set his fork down.

  I swallowed as I looked at the picture again. With a slight shake of my head, I rubbed my lips together. “Nothing,” I told him as I closed it down.

  “No retaliation?” Ash looked over his shoulder at Gray, who stood facing me, his hands resting on the sink behind him.

  “I’m cleared, Coach believes me, and even if he didn’t, it was fixed.” I ate the last bite of my chicken, ignoring the remaining asparagus that lay on my plate. “As for her part, she cemented the fact to Coach I was duped.”

  “That’s it?” Ash looked sceptical.

  “Pussy is pussy,” I told him as I schooled my features. “He won’t beat me on the field, and this?” I tossed the phone onto the table. “This tells me he’s desperate.”

  “Okay.” Ash looked unconvinced.

  Gray watched me, and with a small smirk, he turned back to the sink. The fact my little brother thought I was losing my head over a girl was sobering.

  A girl who didn’t even like me.

  A girl I didn’t even like.

  Did I?

  My foot tapped off the floor, and I watched Ash as he took our plates to Gray, who frowned at my uneaten vegetables before scraping my plate in the trash.

  “You both ready for Houston?” I asked them as I stood. When they nodded, I headed to the front door. “Going to hit Quinn up,” I called over my shoulder as I left.

  The walk to Quinn’s dorm house was quick. Her dad had scored her a single-room apartment. She shared a kitchen with three other girls, but her room, living room and bathroom were her own.

  Taking the stairs two at a time, I rapped my knuckles against her doorframe, and she opened it with a smile.

  “What’s up?” she asked when I closed the door behind me, and she folded herself into her easy chair.

  Wordlessly, I handed her the phone with the Instagram pic. Quinn sniffed in dislike, but she handed it back to me. “It isn’t her.”

  I felt my chest ease, and I was more surprised I’d had anxiety about this. “You sure?”

  “Yes,” she said as she stood. “Hey, look at this.” She tugged my arm, pulling me to her desk. Picking up one of her textbooks, she showed me a diagram, and I turned both my head and the book to figure out the position.

  “This is porn.”

  Quinn gave a delighted laugh. “No, it’s deep tissue massage. Be my guinea pig?”

  “No.” I studied the pic again. It still looked like porn. “Gross, no.”

  “You would do this with Ava in a heartbeat!” Quinn scolded me with a pout.

  “Yeah, cause my dick would get hard and then be wet as she or anyone else would be riding it. You?” I shook my head. “That’s like asking me to tongue Aunt Charlotte.”

  Quinn started to giggle and ended up holding her sides as she laughed. “Fuck, I think I’m going to vomit.” She wiped her eyes as she straightened and fixed me with a stern glare. “It’s not flattering that you’re not attracted to me.”

  “Are
you on glue?” I asked her, bewildered. “You’re like my sister, for fuck’s sake.”

  Quinn spontaneously hugged me. “And you’re the best brother ever.” She planted a sloppy kiss on my cheek.

  “Why you being weird?” I asked as I went and sat down, turning the TV onto the sports channel.

  Her smile dimmed, but she forced herself to remain upbeat. “You ready for Saturday?”

  “Always.”

  She closed her book and stretched out in her easy chair. “You eat?”

  “Gray made chicken and spaghetti.”

  “Nice.” I watched her as she started to play with her hair. “He make you eat your veg?”

  “Tried. He made asparagus.”

  Quinn gagged, and I laughed. “Ash eat his supper?”

  “He did, mom.”

  “You know he fixates,” she said quietly.

  “We do, Gray weighed his portion first.”

  Quinn nodded, and we relaxed into a comfortable silence. As I listened to the sports news, she came over and settled beside me on her small couch. Her head rested on my shoulder, and I wrapped my arm around her.

  “What is it?” I asked her quietly.

  “It would have been his birthday soon,” she told me, and I felt the tear hit my arm.

  “I’m sorry, Queeny.” I kissed her head. “I got you, you can cry, no one else is here.”

  And she did, as I watched the news and held her loosely, she cried into my shoulder. When she got up to dry her eyes and wash her face, I texted my brother.

  Ten minutes later, I opened the door to him, and he pushed past me into the apartment, enfolding her into his arms, and I shut the door behind me as I left.

  Feeling helpless, I headed back home. Some sorrow wasn’t for me to fix, no matter how much I wanted to.

  Turning the TV off, I watched Twitter as the shit talking started about who was going to win between the Lions and the Saints next week. I had watched the Saints today and felt guilty for it, but I needed to see if he won.

  If he won. Not they won.

  Mia was shopping in Cardinal. We had a party tonight at Jett’s house, and she needed new clothes. She didn’t, but her mom had sent her an allowance, and Mia had already blown through half of it.

  I’d been to Cardinal earlier to help with the art class, and although I’d helped, the actual art teacher blew my mind with her skill. The kids loved it though. Ranging from ages seven to eleven, they spent three hours on a Saturday morning in the community hall to give their parents time to do what they needed or to have a break from their parents.

  I was home with some groceries and had made myself lunch when Mia declared she needed new clothes. There was no way in hell she was getting me away from the game, and she knew it. Having blown me a kiss, she assured me she would eat in Cardinal.

  Jett had been precision perfect today. Seriously, I hadn’t even seen top NFL quarterbacks play like he did today. The Lions were in for a fight next week. The hype and speculation were already rampant, and the rest of the league didn’t really exist at this point. Given that they were archenemies didn’t help either.

  The party tonight was at the football team’s house, and as I stared at my small wardrobe, I wondered if I should have gone to the store with Mia and gotten some new clothes. I thought about what Quinn wore and considered my options. With the best will in the world, I couldn’t hope to achieve the same level as Quinn. She was model-like and had obviously always been that way. The ship had sailed for me to suddenly become glamourous overnight.

  I pulled out a black dress. Every wardrobe should have an LBD as my mom called them. Was tonight the night to wear my little black dress? It was pretty. As plain black went. A sleeveless fit and flare dress with a square neckline, and the skirt came mid-thigh. Remembering what happened last time I wore a skirt with Jett around, I blushed.

  Chewing my bottom lip, I put the dress back. I was not putting in a special effort for Jett Santo on the off chance he would want to talk to me as much as I wanted him to talk to me.

  The dress came back out. I was wearing this dress for me, not him. He did not dictate my wardrobe.

  The dress went back. I was wearing jeans, I was more comfortable in jeans. Dressy shorts? I looked at my shorts, and then I went to Mia’s closet. She had a nice pair of black dress shorts with a turn up, and they were classy. I could wear dress shorts. They showed more leg, but they were shorts.

  I took them back to my room and then spent the next hour trying to find anything to match them.

  “Holy gumdrops.” Mia stood in my doorway and looked at the clothes on my bed and on my floor. “I thought I was the one who went shopping,” she teased.

  Looking around my room, I groaned. “I have nothing to wear!”

  “Are those my shorts?” Mia said as she leaned over my bed and picked up her discarded clothing. “And my top?” She looked at me with an amused glint in her eye. “Ava, are you freaking out over the football player?”

  I was so close to denying it, but she was my best friend, and I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. “I’m freaking out over the football player.”

  “The Devil or the Lion?” she asked me with a curious look.

  “The Devil.” I sighed long and hard. “The Lion doesn’t even know my name. And the Devil…well he knows too much.” My face flushed red as I met Mia’s amused look.

  Mia snort laughed and then grinned at me. “My black shorts will look good with your lovely legs and…” She pulled something out of her shopping bag. “I may have bought you this to wear.”

  “Mia!” My eyes widened in excitement. “Ooh, it’s so pretty.” It was, it was a long black top, and across the front was a large heart made up of words with a silver matte splash across it, like paint. Mia held her finger up and turned the top. It was backless. The neck was three buttons and then dropped to a wide band at the bottom, but from my shoulders to my ass, my back would be bare.

  “Shit,” I whispered. “I can’t…can I?”

  “Paired with my black dressy shorts, you will be smoking hot.”

  “My feet?”

  “Not your Chucks.” Mia crossed to my closet and pulled out a pair of ankle boots. “Perfect.”

  “No bra?” I worried my lip, but my eyes stayed glued to the top.

  “You can carry it off,” Mia told me with confidence. “You like?”

  Nodding, I looked at her. “I think so.”

  “We’ll style your hair down,” she said as she gave me a reassuring smile. “That way you can hide your back with your hair if you’re nervous. Or your boobs,” she added dryly.

  “Mia!”

  “What? You think I don’t see them nipples pointing up and saluting him whenever he’s near you?” She grinned as she pulled a slinky dark green playsuit out of the bag. “You like?”

  “Whoa, that is short.”

  “See? You’re not the only shorts girl tonight.”

  I frowned. “But my shorts will actually cover my ass.”

  Mia laughed as she headed to her room. “So will mine, prude.”

  Looking around the room, I stared at the chaos I created, and with a heavy sigh, I started to tidy the mess. When I was finished, I looked at the bag pushed to the back of my closet. Shutting the closet door, I decided I would worry about it later.

  I showered first and let my hair half dry before I blow-dried it as Mia sang country songs in the shower.

  Getting ready was always fun with Mia. I loved watching her style her hair. She had deft fingers, and I watched as she quickly parted her hair into two French braids. Her plaits pulled her hair off her face, leaving the perfectly oval face stark and bare, and she opted for only eyeliner and mascara and then a deep pink lipstick. It was so plain but so in-your-face attention-grabbing. I knew Alex would die of lust as soon as he saw her tonight.

  “Same for me?” I asked as I dutifully sat in front of her.

  “No, but you do get braids. Viking ones for you, I think.”

  I
watched as she parted my hair at the side of my head and wove in two small tight braids. The loose hair at the top, she brushed back, and then with a skill I would never possess, she intertwined the braids at the back of my head so they would not only hold, but also keep the top of my hair in place.

  She applied dark smoky eyeshadow, sweeping the colour across my eyelids while she hummed happily. On the instruction not to move, Mia applied my eyeliner, and then I was instructed to give each eye three coats of mascara. She cleaned off my cheeks with a tissue and then applied a tinted moisturiser over my cheeks and forehead before I got a sweep of pale bronze on my cheeks. My lips, she left nude, and when she stepped back, I looked good.

  I looked better than good.

  “Wow.”

  “You look hot,” she said proudly. “If number eight doesn’t die on the spot, he isn’t worth your time.” Holding my top up, she grinned. “And the beauty of this top?” Unbuttoning the three buttons at the neck, she let the top fall away. “You can step into it.” Handing it to me, she pointed at my room. “Bra off, sexy panties on.”

  “Mia,” I protested as my cheeks flamed.

  “Lace ones, make him want to tear them off you.”

  “Mia! Will you stop?” I laughed as I headed to my room. “I’m dressing for me, no one else.”

  “Course you are, make sure you wear the G-string.”

  “I don’t own a…” I stared at the lacy, flimsy thing on my bed. Holding it up, I examined it.

  “You’re welcome,” she said to me as she stood in the doorway.

  “I owe you money,” I said as I glanced at the panties again.

  “Presents,” Mia answered. “Mom got a royalty cheque.”

  Mia’s mom was an actress, not a very well-known one or, if we were honest, any good either. But she had a part in a bad TV show when Mia was much younger, and it had a cult following now, so her royalty cheque was regular.

  “You shouldn’t use your money on me.”

  “Shush, put them on. Get dressed. I’ll meet you in the kitchen. I’m making mocktails.”

  “I love mocktails!” I said as I closed my door so I could get undressed. A few minutes later, staring at myself in the mirror, I turned once more as I looked at my back. There was no denying I was braless.

 

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