“Ah.” He mused. “Now we’re getting somewhere.”
“Everything was leading to this moment, wasn’t it?”
“Unfortunately, yes.”
“I understand now.” I said. “I know what I have to do.”
“I am sorry Acacia, had there been another way, we’d be there my dear. But you destroyed my body. With my physical vessel gone, this is the only way.”
“I know.”
“Then say your goodbyes, and let’s get this show on the road.”
My mind shifted into overdrive.
This was is. Now or never. Illarion’s fear had locked me up, but it was that fear that allowed Dalca inside, and now, fate had me exactly where I was always meant to be.
The irony forced a choked laugh from me, with it, a breathless gasp as my lungs filled with my own blood.
This was my very mortal, very real death staring me in the face.
The overbearing decay of my soul and flesh was as painful as the day I lost Alex, the day I felt the only child I would ever bear, die, the moment I lost my life with Illarion.
But this was it.
Inside, I cried, I mourned, but on the surface, I continued to thrash, pulling my arms as tightly as I could, as painful as it all was, it was speeding up the whole dying thing.
‘Stop this, Ace!’ Illarion shouted, rushing over to me, but stopping just short. ‘You’re killing yourself.’
That’s the idea, boss. My breath came out in a long, drawn out whimper when the reality of how quickly everything was about to come to an end, hit me.
At least now, it’d be on my terms.
Up above me, the railing holding the chains in place caught my attention. I forced myself up and slowly, I wrapped the chain around my wrist, tightening my hold on it.
Illarion didn’t step closer, his eyes wide and observing my actions.
When he remained in his spot, I did the same to the other wrist, tightening my grip, a hiss escaped before I could stop it—undeterred, I gripped it as hard as I could, ignoring the way it burned my palms.
This time Illarion did step closer, his eyes flicked up to mine.
‘Ace, stop.’
No more screams, no more whimpers. I wouldn’t have long.
‘What are you doing?’ Illarion’s voice was low but that couldn’t be mistaken for calm.
Oh, no, he was on the verge of a very dangerous eruption.
While the words were laced with a deep concern, his eyes were full of venom as they travelled up to the chains and my bleeding palms and then back to my face.
With another small hiss, I wrapped the chain around again, effectively stringing myself up to the point of jarring my shoulders. I could do this. Just one more…
‘Ace, stop.’
Pushing back all the pain, I focused on his eyes and the memories I’d never forget, I focused on the feeling of warmth his love always gave me, I closed my eyes and remembered the first time we kissed, the first time we made love, and I prepared myself as I wrapped the chain again.
As I did, white light exploded behind my eyes and everything inside me slowed, I felt two distinct pains. First, the skin around my wrists broke and second, my left shoulder popped right out of its socket drawing a broken cry from my lips.
‘Ace!’
The stabbing pain shot right into my side and into my heart and I couldn’t help the second scream that broke free. Illarion moved quickly wrapping his arm around my waist, lifting me up to alleviate the pressure.
My body slumped against his jarring me from my pity-party. He didn’t say a word while he released the lock on the shackles. He moved me slowly leaving my left arm hanging helplessly at my side.
He laid me down, moving my hair from my face, at this point I was completely aware of the sweat slicking my forehead and hyperaware of the faint tremors rolling through my body trying to fight the pain—to no avail.
I was going into shock; first came the cold flushes, rapidly followed by a speeding pulse and eventually nausea and blacking out—I remembered all of these things from my training—and they all led to one, final destination; death.
God it felt like it was only yesterday I was in Iraq, sunning myself in the blistering Iraqi sun on the off days, laughing with Alex...
‘Ace!’ Illarion’s firm grip brought my eyes to his. ‘Hold still, this will hurt.’
It felt like only yesterday that Illarion and I were walking hand in hand into the Ritz on our first mission.
‘Hold on!’
It felt like only yesterday that he’d asked me to marry him and I’d said yes.
He pulled my shoulder back into place and I whimpered.
It wouldn’t be long now. My breaths were slowing, and the pain was subsiding.
Illarion tended to my bloodied wrists, tying them off with torn shreds of his shirt all while I looked up into his face, forever memorizing every line and every angle, every color and scar.
As soon as I could manage it, I sucked in a deep breath and slowly reached up, wrapping my hand around his wrist.
His eyes shot down to mine, a brief moment of panic lacing them until he released his hold on me and he let out shaky breath.
‘Ace?’
The gesture took every ounce of borrowed energy and when exhaustion finally won, I laughed in relief. I was back inside my own head.
His hand gently found my cheek, guiding my eyes to his.
‘Is it really you?’
Afraid to let my breath out, I nodded.
‘How?’
This time I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing myself to concentrate, when I opened them again, I let out a long, even breath and found his eyes. ‘I was never gone.’
The realization of those words ripped through him, his eyes closed as a breath caught in his throat.
‘Oh God.’ His eyes quickly filled with tears.
His hands trembled as they grazed my cheeks.
‘Oh Jesus, Ace.’ He shook his head, lowering his lips to my forehead. ‘I need to get you out of here—'
‘No, Ila.’
He cupped my cheek again, letting out a low breath.
‘You need to let me go.’ I said.
Like an automatic response, he shook his head. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘You have, have to let me go.’
‘No—’
‘It’s okay, it’s time.’
‘No, Ace, no, I can’t.’
‘It’s okay…’ I whispered, closing my eyes against his touch, memorizing the way his skin felt, the way he smelled, the way my heart knew despite all the hell I’d been through—that he was always the one constant. ‘It’s okay…’
We both knew, long before this moment that this was the only way. I smiled and found his eyes.
‘I can’t.’ He choked back a sob and his tears fell.
Long before Elena greeted me at the park and I first laid eyes on Illarion, I knew, deep down, somewhere in the confines of my heart I had a greater purpose—a reason to live and die.
Long before I met him, I knew there was someone who loved me more than I deserved, more than I could ever understand.
Something about this felt right, an almost perfect conclusion to a life that was never mine.
Long before I’d made peace with knowing that I was living on borrowed time, I promised myself with everything inside me that I’d never stop fighting, I’d never stop reaching.
But this was my time now.
Aaryon had given me this gift, but even they couldn’t have prepared me for the way things had turned out.
Our own kind was destroying us…for power, for control and in the end, it backfired…and we were all on the line and now, the non-Sensitives held the dice and they were about to roll on a game that would have no winners.
As my body finally stopped trembling, I smiled, reaching out for his hand. I’d get to say goodbye this time and I counted myself so, so lucky. I found Illarion’s eyes and blinked back the haze.
He graz
ed his hand over my cheek again and gently brought my body into his arms.
‘I love you, so, so much Illarion.’ I whispered.
‘No, no, Ace, please, please don’t go. Please don’t leave me.’
‘It’s okay, my love.’
When I was certain that I would carry him in my heart forever, I reached up and cupped his cheek.
With a gentle, determined move, I guided his face down to mine and kissed him one last time.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Illarion
Ikissed her with everything in me, with everything my heart could give because in this moment I would have let her take my life if it meant that she would live. I held onto her, holding onto the hope that this wouldn’t be the end and as the thoughts formed, I felt her let go.
A subtle, almost undetectable shift moved in the air around us and then she went limp in my arms.
I pulled back, holding her head steady against my chest, her red hair cascading over her face.
God no. This couldn’t be the end. It just couldn’t.
We were meant to grow old together, we were meant to see the world together.
My heart lurched in my chest sending a fierce, all-consuming ache through me.
‘Please don’t.’ I heard myself whisper. I squeezed my eyes shut, holding her. ‘Please, lyubov, please don’t go.’
An explosion, off in the distance rocked the foundation of the bunker.
I bowed my head, lowering my forehead to hers. Another explosion behind me shook the walls.
It didn’t matter now.
As another controlled blast rocked through the bunker, the locks on the door were blown open sending a furious rush of debris inward.
Throwing my arms up over her, I shielded her face from the falling dust.
‘Agent Lazarev! We’re coming in, do not retaliate!’
Beams of light broke the dust, cutting through the dark of the blown-out room.
Three agents rushed in and quickly and surrounded me, their assault rifles trained on us. No one spoke as a heavy silence descended and their weapons slowly lowered.
Aurel was nowhere to be found.
No one said a word.
And then I heard it, a cry filled with agony, not unlike my own.
Daniel rushed in, his emotions flooding the entire space.
And behind him, Josh and Peyton.
But no one said a thing.
The three agents who’d rushed in, dispersed and I saw Peyton lean against a wall and slide down.
Daniel dropped to his knees, Josh trying to offer whatever comfort he could.
‘Jesus, no.’ Josh spoke without looking at me.
Everyone was in shock. Everyone was in denial.
No one said a word as I sat with her in my arms.
She died believing that everyone had turned their back on her. I bowed my head, folding in on myself as Daniel’s broken breath filled the still air around us.
‘I’m so sorry.’ His voice faltered as he sat beside me and drew me against him.
I couldn’t help the cries that poured out of me.
Memories started to come to me, replaying like an old home movie. It was just like they’d always said, in the end you start thinking about the beginning. And in the beginning, I’d wasted so much time, in the end, I’d prayed for more.
There was only solitude.
I was alone, and no matter how many times I prayed for more time with there, there’d never be enough even with eternity.
A shallow murmur of a breath held at bay a torrent of tears, I couldn’t stop the onslaught of memories and for the rest of my life, I’d regret how long it took me to tell her I loved her.
***
As the ambulance sped back to the Agency, back to the place which brought us together and tore us apart, nostalgia set in and my heart cracked.
Tears slipped from my eyes and dropped onto my skin where our hands were intertwined.
I drew my finger across the sapphire around her finger and pressed a kiss to her small hand.
‘I love you.’ I breathed. ‘I love you so damn much.’
And that was the last emotion I’d allow myself to feel.
The Agency came into view and I gripped her hand in mine. One final ride, one last visit.
As the ambulance slowed, the armed agents from the base, pulled the doors open and looked away with solemn expressions.
Behind them, Alex pushed through to the front. Wide eyed and distressed, he stopped abruptly when the gurney was set down.
Matt paled, and I thought he was about two minutes out from dropping, thankfully, Peyton and Riley pulled him aside and forced him back, Alex on the other hand, stood deathly still, his eyes fixed on Ace.
She was dead. The Agency won.
He opened his mouth but when no sound came out, he closed it again. His eyes welled and without a word, he turned on the spot and slammed his fist into Aurel’s face.
I thought there’d be more commotion, but the only action aside from Alex attempting to reach for him again and Peyton pulling him back, was Aurel getting to his knees, there he stayed.
A grim satisfaction dulled the other emotions and I walked silently, continuing beside the gurney.
As the hospital wing with the morgue came into view, I pushed through the doors and stopped when they locked the metal table into place. Carefully, I arranged her hair around her face and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, letting my hand linger on her cheek.
A loud scream, and commotion from down the hall broke the reverie. Elena ran in.
She rushed past me and through two agents who’d taken their guard by the entrance. She threw her body over Ace’s, pulling her up into her arms.
Her cries cut through me as she begged and pleaded with the Beings to bring her back. Ace’s body hung limply in Elena’s arms and I didn’t think the Beings would do anything now, they’d already granted her more than most.
But something about the image shocked me more than I cared to admit. Maybe it was the obvious end in it all.
Elena’s sobs continued, hysteria consuming her with each ragged breath she drew and then her attention was on me. She pressed her palm to my chest and cupped my cheek with the other. Her wide green eyes were circled by red rings.
Pain consumed her like it should have consumed me.
If I’d allowed it, it would have killed me.
Instead, I reveled in the way I felt nothing at all. Peaceful, comforting numbness set in and the moment Elena felt it she pulled back and shook her head.
‘No, Illarion.’ She breathed. ‘Don’t do this.’
‘Please take care of her.’ I whispered, turning to leave.
When I looked back at Elena, she shook her head again. ‘Please do not do this, I’m begging you, Illarion.’
Without another word, without another breath, I cast one final look at Ace, and then I left.
There would be nothing that I wouldn’t stop at, nowhere I wouldn’t go, nothing I wouldn’t risk until I found Dalca and the Beings and destroyed them all.
Whatever it took, wherever I had to go, I wouldn’t rest until it was done.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Ace
Awhite, blinding light shrouded me, and I recognized the location almost immediately. It didn’t matter what my eyes saw because in my mind I knew I was miles and miles away.
Maybe even in another time, where none of this stuff happened and I was just a normal girl with a normal life.
In that normal life, I’d married Illarion, we lived in our beautiful home and we were happy. Tears forced a choked sob from my lips, a reactive reaction to the last five years of my life.
I thought I’d have felt better, lighter. I don’t know. Something corny like that. Isn’t that what heaven was meant to be like? I snorted at my own thought. This wasn’t heaven. This was New York.
The streets which were normally bustling with people and traffic, were empty, just like the last time Aaryon had brought me her
e.
I sucked in a deep breath and looked around. It was a sunny day with crystal blue skies. I looked down at the clothes on my body; they weren’t the same black pants and shirt I was in when I died.
A light pair of denims replaced my yoga pants and brown boots replaced my combat ones. A dark brown leather jacket was wrapped around a white tank top, hanging casually over my shoulders.
My hair was a warm, copper hue again and my skin was clear. All the scars and bruises I’d grown so accustomed to were gone.
‘What the hell is this place…’ I whispered out loud.
I should have been surrounded by Light and Dark, I should have been met by Dalca.
I jerked back when I heard birds singing in the distance, cars driving down the road and the sirens alerting me to the hustle and bustle of a vibrant city like the morning rush appeared out of thin air, and then, the presence of someone else joining me, the same presence I’d felt back at the cabin encouraging me to fight.
‘You know, you could have at least gone to a game where the Rangers actually won.’
I froze. My brain refused to get with the show.
‘Though the sentiment was nice, especially the picture you chose from Coney Island. I really think it made my hair look good.’
Tears rapidly filled my eyes and I spun on the spot.
His wide, blue eyes were filled with life, his tanned skin unscathed, free of all the scars that I’d been responsible for and his smile, so very warm and real.
‘Troy.’ I breathed out. ‘How?’
He stepped closer to me, and with every step another moment of my reality fell around me.
‘You going to just stay there or are you going to come and hug me?’
Without another word, I ran to him, everything inside me shouting that I needed to hold him, to feel him, to know that I wasn’t dreaming.
‘Oh my god.’ I cried into his shoulder, it was real and soft and warm like the last time I’d held him.
‘I’m real.’ He chuckled, tightening his hold around me. ‘I promise.’
‘How?’ I pulled back, completely ignoring my messy teary face.
‘You’re up.’ Another voice drew my attention off to my side.
‘How is this possible?’ I knew it was Aaryon before I even turned.
Troy slipped his hand down to mine and entwined our fingers.
Jack of Hart- Wild Card Page 45