by Onley James
“Do you want to meet my mom?”
It was so unexpected, that Elijah could only blink at him for a full minute. “What?”
“My mom. My brother thinks you should meet her. She studies people like me for a living. She could even help you with your research... and with me. If you still want me around after this.”
It was a testament to Elijah’s fucked up life that it had never even occurred to him that removing Shep from said life was even an option. Charlie had talked about red flags. There were enough red flags in this conversation to wallpaper his bedroom and yet none of it mattered. He wasn’t giving Shep up, not yet anyway.
He closed the distance between them without thought, pressing a kiss to Shep’s lips. “I guess we’re going to meet your mom.”
Shep woke to the creaking of the stairs. He didn’t turn on the light, but sat up, putting his feet on the floor. It was Elijah. He knew without looking. He could tell by the cadence of footfalls on the stair risers and by the hesitant way he pushed the door open wider. He’d been quiet since their talk, content to just sit at the island and watch Shep while he rearranged their schedules and hashed out their new travel plans. He’d spent the rest of his time alone in his room packing, only exiting to brush a kiss on Shep’s cheek before claiming he needed to sleep. When he’d gone to bed, he’d brushed a kiss on Shep’s cheek before making a quick exit.
When he saw Shep sitting at the side of the bed, he crossed the room on bare feet, stopping just out of Shep’s reach. Elijah stood, his lip caught between his teeth as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other.
“What’s wrong?” Shep asked.
Elijah took a shuddery breath and then dragged his shirt over his head, dropping it onto the floor. The blood rushed from Shep’s brain to his dick so fast it made him dizzy. Elijah locked eyes with him as he hooked his thumbs in the waistband of his pajama pants and slid them off, leaving him naked and hard. The look on the boy’s face was so vulnerable, it kicked up an instinct in Shep that was too primal to name.
Elijah seemed to make some kind of internal decision, closing the distance between them to straddle Shep’s thighs. “Tell me this is okay,” he whispered, gaze pleading.
Shep nodded, his hands already skimming across Elijah’s bare thighs, itching to touch as much of the boy as possible. “Yes. Just tell me what you need.”
“Kiss me.”
Shep complied, capturing his mouth in a kiss that turned dirty. Kissing Elijah ignited something in him. Everything about Elijah turned him on. The way he sucked in a startled breath when Shep’s tongue slipped into his mouth, the way he moaned when Shep bit his bottom lip. His scent, the heat of his skin, all of it. Everything.
“Put your arms around me,” Elijah demanded. Shep did as he was told, his palms finding Elijah’s ass and squeezing. “Fuck. Yeah. Like that,” he gasped against Shep’s lips. “You feel so fucking good. I just need to come.”
Elijah’s words had Shep’s cock aching. “Take what you want.”
Elijah shifted, wrapping his legs around Shep’s waist, until their bodies fit together like puzzle pieces, the contact making him groan. He caught sight of their reflection in the mirror, him dressed and Elijah naked rutting against him, using him to get off. He drove harder against Elijah and he keened. His whines and whimpers were making Shep crazy. He’d wanted to wring those noises from Elijah since the night he’d arrived, and each sound sent a jolt of electricity straight to his dick.
Elijah moaned against Shep’s ear. “Oh, fuck. Oh, God. You’re so hard. Tell me you want me,” Elijah begged.
“I do want you. I do.” It wasn’t a lie. He didn’t know how or why but Elijah had awakened a passion Shep hadn’t even thought existed within him.
Elijah dropped his head to Shep’s shoulder. When his finger accidentally slipped between the globes of Elijah’s ass the boy sucked in a breath before sinking his teeth into the corded tendon of Shep’s throat.
“I’m so close,” Elijah whispered, hips working faster until the friction caused sparks behind Shep’s lids. “Please, tell me you're close.”
“So close,” Shep promised. Then there was just the sound of Elijah’s breath panting against his ear and the low, throaty moans he made whenever Shep’s finger skated across his entrance. Shep couldn’t help but watch them in the mirror. Elijah was perfect. His perfect boy. Taking his pleasure, using Shep to get off. That thought had him falling over the edge, his orgasm slamming into him. He gripped Elijah tight, riding the wave of pleasure rolling over him as Elijah writhed against him.
“Thank fuck,” Elijah gasped, but then he was crying out, his body rigid as his blunt nails raked Shep’s back, stinging even through the thin material of his t-shirt.
Elijah sat there, his head buried in the crook of Shep’s neck, clinging to him like a lifeline until his breathing slowed. Even as cum started to dry in uncomfortable places, Shep was loath to move. He liked the feel of Elijah’s weight on his lap, the heat of his skin. He smelled like clean sweat and rosemary and mint and Shep wanted to die buried in that scent.
It wasn’t until Elijah started wiggling, his feet twitching against Shep’s lower back that Shep stood and turned, depositing Elijah onto the mattress, blanketing the boy with his weight, careful not to crush him. Elijah stared up at him, content but wary.
“Well, that was… unexpected,” Shep noted.
Elijah nodded. “Sorry.”
Shep frowned. “For what?”
Elijah’s gaze darted away from him. “For using you as my very own sex toy with a pulse.”
Shep’s brows made a run for his hairline. “I like you using me for sex. For anything, really.”
Elijah peeked up at him as if to gauge his truthfulness. “I’ll remember that the next time I need my furniture moved or my taxes done.”
Shep grinned. “I can move your furniture, but you don’t want me doing your taxes.”
Elijah locked eyes with him, then squished Shep’s face in his hands. “Yeah, you’re definitely a cyborg.”
A strange lightness settled in Shep’s chest, it was a completely unfamiliar feeling, but not unpleasant. “Does that bother you?”
Elijah shook his head. “No. Everybody in Hollywood is so fake. They lie. Hell, I lie. Like you said, I’m always recalibrating. You just tell the truth.”
Shep frowned. That wasn’t really true. “Only to you.”
A soft smile appeared on Elijah’s face and Shep wished he could commit that look to memory, lock it away for later. Shep moved, so he was on his back beside Elijah, pleased when the boy curled up against him, his head on his shoulder.
“How do you do it?” he asked.
Shep glanced down at the top of Elijah’s head. “It?”
“How do people not notice that you aren’t able to…” Elijah trailed off like the words escaped him.
“How do I convince the world I’m normal?” Shep asked.
“Uh, I would not put it that way, but yeah, I guess so.”
“How do you know how to behave around people? How do you know which mask to put on for which person?” Elijah didn’t answer, just began to run a finger along Shep’s chest and belly. “You read them, right? You can tell by their expressions, their tone, their posture. I watch you do it all the time. It’s fascinating, like meeting somebody who knows the same secret language I do. I had to learn how to read people. But you, you’re a natural.”
“Thanks,” Elijah said, tone sulky.
Shep frowned. “I said something wrong, didn’t I?”
“You told me I was a fake.”
“No, I said you have a gift for reading people. That’s no easy task. We are both very good at hiding who we are. For the same reason, I’d guess.”
“What reason is that?” Elijah asked.
“Self-preservation. You give people what they want so they don’t look too closely beneath the surface and see how deeply you feel things. I do the same so they don’t see how little I feel. But we both d
o it for the same reason.”
“The first time we met, when I was in the pool. That wasn’t the ‘real’ you, was it? That was the Shep the rest of the world sees. You were kind of an asshole.”
“I was only playing off of you. You were being a brat.”
Elijah’s shoulders rose and fell like he was laughing, but then he asked, “Why did you stop pretending with me?”
That question was easy to answer. “Because I knew it was the only way you’d stop hiding.”
This time Elijah looked up, his eyes practically silver in the dim light. “Oh, I’m still hiding.”
Shep pushed a damp piece of Elijah’s hair off his forehead. “I never want you to hide from me.”
“Everybody hides something. Nobody is completely honest with the people in their lives. We all have secrets.”
“What is it you’re still hiding from me, rabbit?”
Elijah shook his head. “I couldn’t tell you even if I wanted to.”
“Why is that?”
It was a great question, but one with a complicated answer. “I spent ten years of my life trying so hard to forget the worst thing that ever happened to me, but each time a name would creep into my head and destroy my walls, so I convinced myself that the name was the key. If I never said the name, I’d be safe. I turned it into a monster and I never stopped running. I don’t know if I could force myself to say it now even if you tried to torture it out of me.”
Shep’s brows went up, and he leaned down to capture Elijah’s mouth in a kiss. “Careful, I just might.”
He was close enough to see the way Elijah’s pupils dilated at his words. He grinned. “Do you like that thought, rabbit? Do you want me to tie you up and force you to tell me all your deep dark secrets?”
Elijah shivered. “I thought you said you wouldn’t hurt me,” he murmured, not sounding the least bit afraid.
He dragged his teeth along Elijah’s collar bone. “It’s like I said, it’s not always about pain. I don’t need pain to make you spill your secrets.”
The boy shuddered, his pink tongue darting out to wet his lower lip. “Just pressure? You think you know me well enough to make me crack?”
“Just say the word, rabbit, and we’ll find out.”
Elijah shook his head, turning away from Shep. For a moment, Shep thought he’d ruined everything, but then Elijah looked over his shoulder at him. “Snuggle me.”
“What?”
Elijah rolled his eyes, even as his cheeks flushed, grabbing Shep’s arm and tugging until he realized what Elijah wanted. Shep rolled to his side and Elijah wiggled his way back until his cheek rested on Shep’s bicep and his back pressed to Shep’s chest.
“I’m sleeping in here with you tonight.”
Shep buried his nose in Elijah’s hair pressing a kiss against his head without thought. “Okay, rabbit.”
Elijah needed to sleep with Shep every night. Shep would sleep soundly knowing Elijah was safe in his arms.
They chartered a private jet for the ninety-minute flight from LA to Berkeley. It was too large for just the two of them, but it was the only option on short notice and Shep seemed to enjoy the extra legroom. Elijah supposed he’d always taken the leather seats and plush amenities for granted, having flown in private planes for most of his life. It was odd seeing it through other people’s eyes, especially Shep’s. He was pushing each button, adjusting the air vents and testing the recline on his seat. When Shep noticed Elijah watching, he smiled and Elijah’s heart did somersaults. It was so rare to get a spontaneous smile out of him.
Elijah’s joy fizzled fast. Ten minutes into the trip and he already wished they’d just opted to fly first class. Their flight crew comprised two attendants and the pilot, honest-to-God named Captain Kirk. The captain had made curt introductions before disappearing into the cockpit. That left Elijah and Shep in the care of Inga and Erik, two eerily similar attendants with pale skin, platinum hair and bright blue eyes. They looked like they drank beer out of boot-shaped glasses and engaged in competitive yodeling for fun.
Elijah rarely paid any attention to the crew other than to smile and nod and pose for the occasional selfie. But today, he was hyper-aware of them. Well, one of them. Inga. Elijah couldn’t help but notice the way she batted her lashes at Shep, pushing her hair behind her ear and leaning in far too close to talk until her breasts practically suffocated him.
Elijah’s lip curled. Leave some room for Jesus, sweetie.
It was strange seeing Shep outside of their bubble. He seemed so… normal. He smiled, he joked, he was charming and engaging. Even Elijah had fallen under his spell and he knew Shep’s secret. But watching him unleash his dazzling grin on Inga made Elijah both horny and homicidal. He wanted to hiss at the girl, to curl himself around Shep’s arm so she knew exactly who he belonged to... but he couldn’t. He couldn’t because Shep was just his bodyguard and Elijah had a very famous boyfriend and there were no non-disclosure agreements with these attendants.
So instead, he sat and drank his sparkling water as Shep regaled her with some story Elijah couldn’t hear, his face far more expressive than when the two of them were alone. The girl seemed to find excuses to come back and check on Shep while Erik tended to Elijah with the casual indifference of a person used to dealing with rich assholes and celebrities. Not that they were mutually exclusive. The closest Elijah and Erik came to bonding was a shared eye-roll when Inga laughed just a little too loud at something Shep said.
Elijah seethed in silence for as long as he could stomach it, but when the girl made a show of bringing Shep another napkin, letting her fingers skim over his forearm, Elijah was done. He pulled his phone out, keying up Shep’s number, banging out a text rapid fire.
Elijah: If Inga, the Swiss Miss girl, doesn’t stop flirting with you, I’m going to rip her throat out. I’d like to see her try to yodel then.
It was only when Shep snorted a laugh that Elijah glanced up. Shep flicked his gaze from his screen to Elijah, a smirk on his face as he said something to the girl under his breath. She flushed, her perfect peaches and cream complexion turning naked-mole-rat pink before she straightened, scurrying to the back of the plane.
When she left, Shep stood and took the seat diagonal from Elijah so they faced each other but weren’t close enough for their legs to touch. He said nothing, just watched Elijah with those brilliant golden eyes in a way that made Elijah wish they were all alone on the plane.
“What did you say to her? The poor dear looked shaken,” Elijah snarked, taking a prim sip of his water.
“I told her my boyfriend keeps me on a very short leash.”
Elijah inhaled his water, coughing hard enough for his chest to burn and for Shep to look concerned. “What?” Elijah managed, voice strangled as he attempted to suck air into his lungs.
“My imaginary boyfriend who I’m going to visit back home in Berkeley.” Shep clarified, a banal smile on his face.
Elijah’s mood soured. He knew he was the closest thing Shep had to a boyfriend, even though the term seemed ridiculous with Shep being twenty years his senior, but still, he didn’t like Inga thinking Shep was in a relationship with anybody but him.
“Did I do something wrong again? You’re sulking.”
Elijah sighed. “I’m fine. I’m just cranky because I didn’t get any sleep last night.”
Shep’s look pinned Elijah to his chair. “Whose fault is that?”
Elijah’s skin grew hot and his cock hardened behind his zipper. He leaned forward, dropping his voice, “If you don’t stop looking at me like that, I’m going to crawl into your lap and do things to you that will definitely land us both on TMZ.”
Shep’s gaze raked Elijah’s body like he was standing there naked and not in jeans and a hoodie. “I can’t help the way I look at you, rabbit.”
Elijah swapped seats, gaze darting around the cabin. When he realized they were alone, he leaned close enough to run his tongue along the shell of Shep’s ear. “You’re supposed t
o be the sheepdog who watches over me, not the wolf trying to eat me, Sam.”
“You’re not a sheep, rabbit, but I’m most definitely the wolf.”
It was such a cheesy line, but Elijah shivered anyway. “Kiss me. Quick.”
Shep slanted his lips across Elijah’s in a kiss that had him curling his toes in his sneakers. “Fuck, I really need to be alone with you,” Elijah whispered when they separated, his heart racing.
“Soon,” Shep promised.
Elijah nodded, hopping back to his seat as Erik emerged from behind the red curtain at the back of the plane.
The rest of the trip passed without incident, Elijah listening to soft new age music and Shep doing some work on his laptop. In the backseat of the limo, they sat a respectable distance apart, their hands close enough to touch. Elijah knew he shouldn’t, but he curled his pinky around Shep’s. Elijah swore the older man almost smiled.
When the car stopped outside a sprawling white house with an iron fence and a view of the Bay, Elijah cut his eyes towards Shep. “You didn’t tell me you were…”
Shep frowned. “I was what?”
“This house has to be worth a million dollars, easy,” Elijah stated, taking in the manicured lawn with its symmetrical topiaries and the purple door with its large brass knocker. It was no palatial estate—it might not have been more than a couple of thousand square feet total, but like all California real estate Berkeley was overpriced, especially the Poet’s Corner neighborhood.
Shep did that thing where he tipped his head like a dog who didn’t quite understand its master. “That bothers you?”