Luciana had at first been wary about returning to her flat, but she’d made a promise to herself to spend the weekend here when she wasn't working so she could get back into a routine. Sam would soon be leaving the city for her home on the outskirts of Liverpool, and it wouldn’t always be possible for Luciana to be there. When she worked a night shift, it made more sense to come back to her flat and sleep while Sam worked at the office. One day, she hoped that would all change, but for now…this was perfect. Ideal. Heavenly.
The sound of her buzzer broke her from her energetic movements in the kitchen, her heart stopping. Nobody knew she was here, only Sam. The problem was, it couldn’t be Sam. They’d spoken half an hour ago and her girlfriend explained that she wouldn’t be back for at least another hour or so, motorway roadworks preventing her from getting into the city any earlier. She cleared her throat, lowered the volume on the radio and lifted the receiver.
“H-Hello?”
“SURPRISE!”
A familiar voice filtered through the handset, but it wasn't the voice she hoped she would hear.
“Mum?”
“Let me up, love,” Jackie said. “I only have a few hours before my train leaves to go home again.”
Luciana granted her mum access to the block, thankful that it was a familiar face rather than the abusive one of Janet. Until this moment, Luciana hadn’t realised that the other woman still unnerved her, but she did. She always would. Opening the door, she returned to the kitchen and flicked the switch on the kettle.
“Hello?”
“Come in, Mum.” Luciana stood in the kitchen, her smile beaming as her mum poked her head around the door. “How are you?” She crossed the flat and hugged her mum tight. “I didn’t know you were coming.”
“Decided to hop on the train an hour ago and here I am.”
“Dad not with you?”
“No, he had to work again.” Jackie offered her daughter a small smile. “But one of us is better than none of us, wouldn’t you say?”
“Definitely.” Luciana released her grip and stepped back. “I, uh… I kind of have plans this evening.”
“Out with the station?”
“No.” Luciana blushed. “My uh, my girlfriend is due here in about an hour.”
“Girlfriend?” Jackie’s eyebrow rose with surprise. “I knew you were dating, but a girlfriend?”
“I didn’t want to jinx anything, Mum. You know what I’m like.”
“Don't worry about it.” Jackie dropped her handbag onto the couch. “So, her name?”
“Sam.”
“Have you been together long?”
“About six weeks or so.” Luciana eyed her mother, expecting a reaction.
“So long as she makes you happy…”
“She’s thirty-eight.” The words left Luciana’s mouth before she could process them. In all honesty, she didn’t know why she had said them.
“Are you telling me that because you want my opinion or are you just giving me some information to work with?”
“Honestly, I've no idea.” Luciana laughed. “I don't care for people’s opinions, as you know.”
“And you know I would never say anything to hurt you.” Jackie approached her daughter. “If she makes you happy, that makes me happy.”
“I knew you wouldn’t mind.”
“It’s your relationship, my love.” Luciana’s mum pulled herself up on a stool at the breakfast bar. “And you know I'm always here if you need to talk…though I don't expect you will.”
“Things are really good here, Mum.”
“You look happy.” Jackie reached her hand out, taking her daughter’s. “You look happier than you have in years.”
“Because I am.” Luciana squeezed her mum’s hand. “I didn’t think I needed a relationship to make me feel that way, and I know it isn’t the be all and end all of everything, but I couldn’t imagine not having her in my life now.”
“Can I meet her?”
“Do you want to meet her?” Luciana countered. “I mean, you won't do or say anything to put her off, will you?”
“Would I do anything to jeopardise a relationship of yours?”
“No, you wouldn’t.” Luciana knew in her heart that her mum would always have her back. It’s why they’d always been so close. “Let me text her so she knows you're here. She’s been away for three days.”
“Sounds interesting.”
Luciana grabbed her phone from the worktop and tapped away at the screen.
“She’s a property developer.”
L: Mum has just arrived. Is that okay? X
“Lovely.” Jackie chose to take over the coffee duties while her daughter arranged with her girlfriend. “Usual two sugars?”
“Please.” Luciana glanced up momentarily before returning to her phone.
S: Looking forward to meeting her. If you want that? X
L: More than anything. ETA? X
S: At a service station grabbing coffee. I’m dead on my feet. Should be with you in the next half hour. Should I bring anything? X
L: Yourself. X
S: I’ve missed you. X
L: I’ve missed you more. X
S: Should I let myself up? X
L: Yes, you definitely should. I’ll keep Mum company until you arrive. X
Luciana placed her phone down and looked up to find her mum staring at her, smiling. “What?”
“You only sent her a text but your face looks like she’s just promised you the world.”
“Don't be ridiculous.” Luciana felt the tips of her ears heat.
“You’re in love with this woman,” Jackie observed. “Head over heels in love.”
“Mum, please don't say that in front of her.” Luciana felt a sudden panic set in. “I’ve been trying to figure out when the right time to tell her is… I still haven’t found the courage to say it.”
“That’s not like you.” Jackie carried two cups into the living room. “What’s wrong? You can't be having second thoughts.”
“No, I'm not.” Luciana dropped down onto the couch. “No way.”
“Then what is it?”
“Sam, she’s married.” Luciana tucked her legs under her. “Her wife died two years ago.”
“Oh, love.” Jackie sighed. “That’s awful.”
“I’m just trying to take it slow and not say or do anything to ruin the moment. You know?”
“But if you love her, she should know that.”
“I know, and I will tell her one day.” Luciana nodded. “I just have this worry that she won't feel the same way. I try not to think about it too much and I try to imagine us together in the future, but saying I love her seems to be impossible for me to do.”
“Of course you're scared. That’s perfectly natural,” Jackie said. “Not only is she older than you, but she’s had a life experience nobody should go through so young. She has you now though and all you can do is show her who you are, because I know she will love you back. You have a wonderful heart, Luce. Sam would want to know how you feel.”
“At times, I feel like the universe brought us together in some way.”
“Explain…”
“Her wife was called Lucia. She died in a fire.” To this day, it sounded incredibly strange to say that out loud. Luciana struggled to comprehend how something so devastating could be so similar to who she was. “I wasn't looking and neither was she.”
“Then yes, I do believe the universe brought you together.” Jackie smiled. “Fate. If you believe in that stuff.”
“I suppose I do, in some way.” Luciana nodded. “She just…God, she’s perfect, Mum. Everything about her. I’m yet to find a single fault. And I know, I know everyone has faults, flaws…but Sam is everything I believe I want and need in my life. We just fit together so perfectly. Nothing feels forced.”
“That’s when you know you’ve found true love.”
“You think?”
“I do.” Jackie nodded slowly. “But only you know what you want, love. Nobody else can tell you what to do.”
“What would you do?”
“If that was how I felt?” Jackie paused. “I’d grab it with both hands and never let it go, Luce.”
“Thanks, Mum.”
“Our time on this earth can be short; Sam knows that better than anyone. Your job…you run towards danger every day.”
“Mum—”
“Hear me out.” She held up her hand. “How would you feel if something happened, to either one of you, and you never had the chance to tell Sam that you loved her?”
“Devastated.”
Luciana knew what her mum was trying to say. In her line of work, everything could disappear. One wrong move. One incredible fire. It could all be over. All it took was a locked door, a roof collapse. Running towards fire may be exhilarating to Luciana, but the consequences of nights when it could potentially go wrong could be earth-shattering. She knew that, and she knew her mum was right.
“I’ll build myself up to it soon, I promise.”
“Or you could just let your relationship bring it out of you when you least expect it.” Jackie’s eyebrow rose. “Don't think about saying it. When it feels right, when it’s on the tip of your tongue, say those words.”
“God, I didn’t realise how much I needed to talk to you about this.”
“You know I'm only down the road.”
“I know. Life just got in the way…and now here we are.”
“I’m so happy you're thriving here, Luce.” Jackie pulled her daughter into a hug. “So happy.”
***
Sam blew out a deep breath as she reached the top of the stairs. Her eyes landed on her girlfriend’s front door, but something prevented her from moving closer. Sam was ready for this. Of course she was. So why did she feel as though all oxygen had been stolen from her lungs? Why did her legs falter as she attempted to move? Because this mattered, that’s why. Luciana meant the world to her and this meeting was important. Sam knew all too well how much a first impression mattered. They’d discussed meeting Luciana’s parents on more than one occasion, but Sam never imagined she would feel this anxious about it when the time finally arrived. She was a successful businesswoman, for the love of God. A meeting with someone’s parents shouldn’t spook her like this. It was ridiculous. Luciana wasn’t just someone, though. She was Sam’s everything.
Okay, just go inside. Sam glanced down at the keys in her hands. There is nothing to worry about. She ran her fingertips over the silver key, a heart keyring attached to it. Smiling, she pushed her hair from her face and took a step closer. It’s just her mum. She reminded herself. If she’s anything like her daughter, this will be great.
Sam steeled herself and slid the key in the lock. The sound of laughter caught her attention, and in turn, unexpectedly settled her worry. When she opened the door, the sight in front of her caused her breath to catch. Luciana lay sprawled out on the couch, her baggy sweatpants accompanied by her white racer-back. That gorgeous blonde hair sat atop her head in the form of a messy bun, and her eyes… God, her eyes absolutely shone. Sam had fallen in love with her girlfriend’s eyes the moment she met her, but after three days away, they begged her to move closer.
“Babe?” Luciana brought Sam from her stare. “You doing okay over there?”
“Oh.” Sam’s eyes widened. “Yes, sorry.” She cleared her throat, closing the door.
Luciana climbed from her position on the couch and took Sam in her arms. “I’ve missed you.” She leaned in, her lips ghosting over Sam’s. “So much.”
“Baby,” Sam whispered, her eyes closing momentarily. “We have company.”
“Right, yeah.” Luciana spun around. “Mum, this is Sam.”
Jackie beamed. “The woman my daughter hasn’t stopped talking about.”
“Oh.” Sam blushed.
“Jackie.” Luciana’s mum held out her hand, still smiling from ear to ear. “An absolute pleasure to meet you.”
“You too.” Sam took her hand, internally chastising herself for ever worrying about this moment.
“I won't stay too long,” Jackie said. “I’m sure you two want to relax. Luce said you've been away.”
“Three days.” Sam blew out a breath as she dropped her handbag to the floor and removed her jacket. “I don’t plan to do it again unless completely necessary.”
“Yeah, I wish,” Luciana cut in, handing Sam a glass of her favourite red wine.
“No, I mean that.” Sam smiled. “Mm, I needed this.” She licked the wine residue from her lips.
“How was your trip?” Jackie asked, enamoured by the interaction playing out in front of her.
“Miserable.” Sam moved into the living room. “I had zero interest in being there.”
“Everything okay?” Luciana’s brows drew together as she sat beside Sam. “You go on multiple trips.”
“I wanted to be here with you.” Sam took her girlfriend’s hand, sitting back and crossing her legs.
Luciana salivated as her eyes followed Sam’s luscious, long legs. It wasn’t often Sam wore a skirt, but damn, she wore them well. The black heels Sam chose had to be at least six inches in height. Luciana struggled to maintain clean thoughts, only images of a naked Sam in heels now firmly in her mind. Spread out on her bed. Writhing. Moaning.
“Wouldn’t you agree?” Sam squeezed Luciana’s hand.
“Um…”
“That the bungalow is perfect. So much more than being out here in the city.”
“Oh, yes.” Luciana managed a smile, but Sam narrowed her eyes, smirking. “It’s gorgeous, Mum.”
“It sounds it.” Jackie relaxed in her seat. “Maybe I could visit one day?”
“If I'm there, yeah.”
“Why wouldn’t you be there?” Sam asked.
“Well, I just… I don’t know.” Luciana found herself unable to concentrate. “Work. Stuff. I don’t know.”
“Oh, about that.” Sam’s eyes brightened. “I noticed your car was making a horrific noise when you started it last week.”
“It’s been making that noise for the last six months.” Luciana laughed. “But it’s still going.”
“Mm, but I don’t want you getting caught at work one night because it won't start. You’d have no way of getting back.”
“I can just come here, it’s fine.”
“Of course.” Sam chose to shelve that conversation until later. That was the second time Luciana had refrained from the potential excitement of the bungalow on the lake. “How long will you be staying, Jackie? You’ll be staying here with us…”
“Oh, I have a train to catch in an hour.” Luciana’s mum smiled. “Just a flying visit this time around.”
“That’s a shame.” Sam sat forward, setting her wine glass down. “But I can take you home. No need for trains.”
“That’s very kind, Sam.” Jackie held up her hand. “But you've been driving all afternoon.”
“It’s no problem.”
“I know, but the train will be fine tonight.” Jackie offered a thankful smile. “Luciana has missed you. Enjoy what’s left of your night together.”
“Be right back.” Luciana stood up, disappearing into the bathroom.
Sam watched the door close and shifted in her seat, clearing her throat. “You are okay with this, right?” While Sam loved Jackie’s enthusiasm, she couldn’t be sure it was completely genuine. She’d expected this reaction from her own mother and got the opposite, so she had to ask. “I’d understand if you were wary of me.”
“Would it matter if I had an issue?” Jackie’s eyebrow rose.
“Well, I'd like to say that it wouldn’t, but you're Luciana’s family and I only want her to be happy. If this would put a strain on your relationship…”
“I have no issue at all, Sam,” Jackie said with a sincere voice. “Luciana is happier than I've ever seen her.”
“She is?” Sam’s pulse thrummed in her ears.
“My daughter doesn’t need much in life, but this? Love? She deserves it,” Jackie continued. “She spends her life helping people; the least she should receive in return is her own happiness.”
“You really do have an amazing daughter.” Sam glanced at the closed bathroom door. “I don’t think she understands how much she means to me.”
“Maybe you should tell her.” Jackie winked. “She’s a big girl. She can handle whatever truth you have to offer her.”
“I may have it all.” Sam sighed. “But the thought of losing this, her, it would finish me off.”
“What makes you think that you're going to lose her?” Jackie’s forehead creased.
“If I tell her how I feel, she’s going to run.” Sam wrung her hands together in her lap. “She says she’s not going anywhere, but what we have… I’m not sure I can risk it.”
“Luciana doesn’t run.” Jackie shook her head. “She told me about your wife.”
“Mm, understandable.” Sam sipped her wine.
“She also told me how you worry about her job.”
“Hard not to.” Sam smiled weakly. “When she’s working, I fully expect a call, you know?”
“I did at one time,” Jackie admitted. “So much so that she left home and moved here.”
“Oh.” Sam lowered her eyes. “I’m managing it, how I feel. I know she’s safe and I know she’s trained.”
“She also wouldn’t do anything to put herself in danger. Luciana plays by the book.” The sound of the bathroom door opening caught their attention and Sam smiled.
“Thank you.” Sam said, lowering her voice.
The Arrangement Page 25