She shook her head. What man would make him believe her. Elizabeth ran her hand protectively across her stomach. A child. She smiled. The thought filled her with as much joy as it did sadness. How did it come to this, she thought? What had she been thinking?
Elizabeth eventually found sleep. It had not come easily. She had woken late and the house was empty. She was glad of it. Elizabeth headed into the Kitchen and found a tray had been left for her. She took it into her office and went over the books. Anna came in with coffee sometime later and Elizabeth worked through the day. She did not want company and was grateful to be left alone.
Red Wolf was not happy. He wanted to go to her and explain. Let her know that Sky had divorced him. That he was free to be with her. White Dove tried to calm him, she tried to sooth him with words of understanding, but he couldn’t hear her.
She told him that Elizabeth needed time. Time to get used to the idea. Time to realise what she wanted, with or without him and without his persuasion or influence. That it needed to be her decision to accept this child and come to terms with what that means for her. Not because of him alone.
Red Wolf found it hard to accept the truth of her words and left the house. Would nothing be simple, he asked himself.
Elizabeth isolated herself for the next few days. She could not face seeing Red Wolf each day and know that she carried his child. She felt lost. Unsure of what her future held.
Not even sure, after wishing for it, that she wanted a child, his child alone. What did that make her? It was such a terrible thought that it scared her. Having a child scared her. Giving birth scared her. Being responsible for a child scared her. Her mama had been so good at it. Raising a child alone seemed unimaginable to her. She did not feel ready for this. And yet, she had to accept she had begged him for it.
Elizabeth came to seek out White Dove. She asked her to sit with her, she needed to talk to someone. Elizabeth didn’t know where to start. She tried to find some order to her mind and eventually she felt calm enough to try.
“Having this child scares me, but I do want it more than anything, it scares me to be responsible for another being, it scares me to be on my own doing this and it scares me more, that it will tear open the relationship between Red Wolf and the tribe. I know he will never leave me and his child. I can only think that I must tell him, this child belongs to another.”
White Dove stared at her. “That would not be wise.”
Red Wolf stood in the doorway. He had heard her say the child was not his. Red Wolf looked like he would explode.
“I will kill him,” he roared and ran for the bunkhouse. Elizabeth and White Dove shot to their feet, following him running for their lives but they were not so fast.
By the time they arrived, several men were holding him back and Carl was on the floor bleeding. Black Dog hovered. Elizabeth came to realise her mistake. Red Wolf would never accept another man. She came and stood between them and turned to Carl.
“Are you alright?” she asked him.
This only enraged Red Wolf more.
Carl looked at her. “I’m as confused as hell but I’m ok”.
She turned to Red Wolf and looked at her brave warrior. He would never be any more magnificent than he was right that moment. But he’d been wrong in this and it was her fault.
“You are mistaken here.” She told him evenly. “You have wronged him and me.” It was Red Wolfs turn to look confused.
“But I heard you.” He told her.
“You heard the end of a conversation that was not complete, come back to the house.” She told him.
She turned to Carl. “I’m sorry that happened. I will explain later.” Red Wolf felt like a fool, he had acted like a fool. This was not honourable. He shrugged off the men holding him and rode out.
Elizabeth waited for him. Worried he’d been out in the cold with his mount. Her relief at seeing him ride back in next day was a reminder of what losing him meant. This couldn’t go on.
Calmer and in need of answers. He found her in her office. The door was slightly open and she was on her own. She was turning over the gift he’d left her.
“Why don’t you open it?” He asked from the doorway. He pushed the door wider and looked at her. “Can I come in?”
Elizabeth looked up and smiled. “That depends, are you going to listen or jump to conclusions.” Red Wolf cringed. He deserved that. They looked at each other for a while. Elizabeth sighed and waved him in, opening his gift.
It was a piece of ivory, carved on it, was one Indian symbol. She looked back at him.
“It’s beautiful. What does it say?” She asked him.
“Always.” He told her. Her eyes searched his.
He looked away first and walked in.
“Truce?” she asked using their old childhood compromise.
He smiled. “Agreed.”
Red Wolf sat down. For a time neither spoke. Each not sure who should tell the other their news first. Both started to speak at the same time. Stopped and laughed.
“Ok, I think I should go first,” she told him. “I am, expecting a child and the child is yours.”
Red Wolf broke out in a huge smile. He wanted to hug her, kiss her, make love to her. Keep her in his bed for weeks. Cherish her, feed her and his child. Elizabeth held up her hand. She wasn’t finished. “I wanted this.” She told him. “This is my doing and it seems that I got exactly what I asked for.” She smiled resolvedly. “I will not let this be something that breaks apart everything my father and ours, has worked so hard for all these years.”
Elizabeth was on a roll; it all came out. “I will not share you and offer a child a part time parent, and you cannot change what is expected of you. The elders need a blood bond and I can now give it to them. I will tell them it is a child of the tribe, that will be obvious to everyone in time. The only problem will be having a brave to acknowledge it. I hope our father can help with that.” She finished.
Elizabeth was amazingly calm. “Are you done?” He asked her.
Elizabeth got cross all over again. “Done?” She asked pissed. She had just unburdened her soul and he asks if she is ‘Done?’
Red Wolf indicated she should calm down again.
“Getting up set is not good for the baby. I came from the village with one purpose.” He told her quietly. “If it had not meant my life to me. I would not have put mine or others at risk.” He told her honestly.
It was Elizabeth’s turn to look concerned. “Is father alright?” she asked him.
“Yes, he is as well as can be, that is not what I am talking about.”
He continued. “Sky.” Elizabeth shrunk visibly in her chair. “Has divorced me.”
“Divorced you? How?” she asked. Red Wolf explained the circumstances and events to her. Elizabeth frowned. “She err she made them believe you couldn’t give her a child? Don’t you think that’s going to be an issue soon?”
Red Wolf looked at her and grinned widely. “It will tell them she was wrong and hasty in letting me go.”
“This is not amusing Red Wolf. And your leadership of the tribe?” she asked him.
“That will pass to Running Elk. The Council have agreed.” Elizabeth sat shocked. “Red Wolf I am so very sorry; I feel I am much to blame for this.”
He shook his head at her. “We are neither to blame, it was just the way it was going to be,” he told her. So much wasted time. So much confusion. Traditions and expectations. Elizabeth wasn’t sure she wanted to bring a life into the world in the middle of all this. She wasn’t sure she could do it.
“The tribe has what it needs to carry on. My father is comforted that his son and grandson will lead them onwards. The elders are happy that there is a blood bond with them and you. It is settled.“ He told her.
Elizabeth shook her head. It has cost him everything.
“Esa, I need to ask you again, do you want me as a father to our child. Do you want me as your husband, your mate?”
Elizabeth thought how
strange that sounded. After everything that had happened since she’d returned from back East. From her arrival at the stage post and Red Wolf riding proudly in on his horse to get her. To him first asking her that question.
‘She did,’ she thought. More than anything she wanted this male and a life with him. She knew it now. He had always been the draw to home. She knew it would not be easy. He was demanding and dominant. She was stubborn and wilful. They both had tempers. But he understood her. Would worship her. Would fight and die for her if he had to. And he would cherish their children to the ends of their days.
The silence was killing him. Eventually Elizabeth looked up from the gift he’d given her and looked into his eyes.
He was an amazing example of man, she thought. The only man she had ever truly wanted. She had come back for him, she realised. He had known all those years ago and waited for her. He had defied his people for her, chosen her over them. There was only ever really one answer.
“Always.”
The End …
Always Page 30