by Tee, Marian
Man up, Blackwood.
Blake had made her choice clear, and she had chosen Teller over him.
He had to fucking accept that and move on.
But the moment he stepped out of the men's toilet, the first thing he saw was her, coming out of the ladies', her eyes red-rimmed and swollen with tears.
Their gazes collided, and God, even that...even that felt like it had been so fucking long, that when she suddenly tried to bolt like he had a contagious disease, Thornton found himself reacting instinctively.
Hard fingers curled around her arm, and then Blake suddenly found herself being spun back to face Thornton.
"Why are you so hell bent on avoiding me?"
Instead of answering, she lowered her gaze to his injured hand. "What happened?"
"Don't change the subject."
Silence.
"Dammit, Blake. Just tell me why."
But it seemed as if their roles had suddenly reversed, and it was Thornton who had all the words to say while Blake could only stare at him.
"I should be the one who's unable to stand the sight of you," he said in a hollow voice, "but it's not working like that for me. If all I can have is see you, then I want it. But you..." He stopped speaking when he heard a strangled sound escape her. "Blake..." He saw her body start shaking at the strength of her sobs, but when he tried to touch her, she yanked away, and he could feel himself turning cold.
Blake couldn't stand the desolation in Thornton's eyes. "I'm s-sorry."
"Then tell me why you're acting like I fucking killed you."
Because you did.
But she just couldn't make herself say that, and when she heard voices and footsteps, realized that this was the real start of the party and that anyone could just walk in at any moment and see her crying---
"I need to go," she whispered jerkily.
But when she tried to walk past Thornton, he hauled her into his arms instead.
No!
It felt too good. Too painful. Too much of everything she dreamed and knew she could never have.
"Baby."
The agony in his voice was too much.
"Please."
It threatened to undo her, weaken her, and she just couldn't...
Couldn't.
Just couldn't.
She tore herself out of his hold. "I know the truth," Blake choked out. "And I can't...I can't..."
Thornton whitened. "I...see." His voice was dull. She knew. She knew he was in love with her, and she was just so fucking nice, she was avoiding him in hopes of hurting him less.
He forced himself to look at her. "I'm sorry." It wasn't her fault he loved her and she couldn't love him back.
He was sorry, he said.
But sorry for what?
For hurting her?
For Blake finding out before he was ready for the game to end?
She squeezed her eyes shut. "I'm sorry, too." And she was. Sorry that even now, after everything...she still loved him.
Chapter Twenty-One
Out of the rabbit hole or in it? The doors of Redwood Cafe were just right behind her, but Blake wasn't quite sure what leaving the place meant. Inside, it was delirium and chaos, with most of the cast and crew mindlessly noisy and well in their cups. She had tried to fit in with them for the past two hours, but it hadn't worked.
And when she saw him leave, she had followed without thinking.
But she had been too slow.
He was gone now, and any world that was empty of his presence was just like another rabbit hole because it felt wrong.
Everything felt wrong---
"Hey."
Blake jerked in surprise, and then she jerked again when she saw who it was stepping out from the shadows.
"M-Miss Patridge," she stammered.
The flaxen-haired actress waved a careless hand in the air. "Call me Blue."
"Blue?"
The other woman wrinkled her lovely nose, which was as ethereally perfect as the rest of her. "It's my real name."
Oh.
"Bluebell to be exact." She saw the brunette's eyes widened and shrugged. "I know. But at least it's not Tinkerbell, right?"
"Or doorbell," Blake said without thinking, and it was only when Blue snorted with laughter that she realized how rude and sarcastic her words might have come across. "Oh my gosh, I'm so---"
"It's fine," Blue assured her, a twinkle in her eyes, which were the same shade as her name.
An awkward silence followed as Blake belatedly noticed the curious way Blue was studying her face. "I...um..."
"Have been crying?" the actress asked frankly.
Blake stiffened.
"You and the scary-looking dude had a fight, didn't you? The one who looks like Keanu with a beard?"
"I..."
"My acting might suck," Blue said candidly, "but it doesn't mean I don't have an eye for it. And you and that dude?" She remembered the way the other woman and local John Wick had been pretending to ignore each other from the opposite sides of the cafe, and Blue couldn't help shaking her head. "You two have it really bad for each other."
Blake shook her head. "You must be mistaken---"
"Nope." To Blue's surprise, she saw the younger woman's lips start trembling. Shit. Maybe the others were right about her, and she was just a natural-born bitch with a talent for making people cry.
"I'm s-sorry." Blake was doing her best to fight back tears.
"No, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have butted in---"
"It just hurts, you know?" Blake choked back a sob. "I really wish what you said were true, but it's not."
Blake pursed her lips. Don't meddle.
"It's entirely one-sided..."
Nothing ever good comes out from getting unnecessarily involved.
"But he doesn't love me---"
Oh, for shit's sake.
Blake was startled when the actress suddenly grabbed her shoulders.
"I'm dumb about a lot of things," Blue told the other girl flatly, "but never about love. And the way Bearded Hottie was looking at you the whole night? It's love."
"But---"
"Did he tell you he didn't?"
"Not in so many words---"
"Did he or didn't he?"
"No," Blake whispered.
"Then you should go after your man and ask him. Hear it straight from the horse's mouth and all that. It could mean losing your face after, but it's a risk worth taking, don't you think?"
* * *
It was raining again. Thornton was usually meticulously prepared for things like this, but a lot had changed since a certain dark-haired girl came into his life---
And grabbed him by the balls, he thought grimly.
Rain fell harder and faster as he continued walking, but he didn't even notice. He just felt fucking empty, and he wasn't sure if he would ever be able to recover from it.
He kept seeing Blake in his mind.
I know the truth.
But it wasn't the Blake he wanted to remember.
I can't...I can't...
Pain forced Thornton into an abrupt halt just as he was about to cross the street. God. He squeezed his eyes shut. God. But he could still see her tear-stained face and hear her sobs. God.
She doesn't love you, Blackwood. So just fucking let her go.
The mere thought hurt, but he knew it was the only thing to do. Keeping her in his life would only have her always feeling guilty, and she'd never be truly happy.
So just let her go.
He slowly dragged oxygen into his lungs.
So be it.
But when he opened his eyes, it was to find God playing a cruel joke on him, with Blake standing across the street, right outside the gates of his place. She was wet and shivering, but even this far he knew it wasn't just rain that was tracking down her cheeks.
She was crying.
Again.
Because of him.
* * *
Blake could feel her body shaking harder and harde
r when Thornton finally started to move. She watched him slowly cross the street, and her heart thumped harder and faster against her chest. Please God. Please. Please.
And when he finally stood in front of her...
Please, she wanted to cry out to the heavens. Please.
She slowly lifted her gaze to his. "W-Where have you been?"
"Why do you even ask?"
Because I care, she wanted to say. But the shuttered expression on Thornton's beautiful face terrified her, and she could feel her courage wilting with every second that passed. Blue was wrong, she couldn't help thinking brokenly. This man wasn't in love with her. She had to be a fool to imagine someone like Thornton Blackwood could ever be in love with someone like her.
Thornton couldn't help feeling bitter when he saw Blake's expression change. There it fucking was again. That look that told him she wished she had never met him...
"Damn you."
Blake flinched.
"Why don't you just fucking leave and be done with it?"
"B-Because..." I love you. But how could she say that, knowing he could never love her back?
"Because what?" he roared. "Because you pity me?"
The words were so unexpected that it drew Blake out of her despair. What was he talking about?
"You chose him," he bit out. "He won. I lost."
Her confusion grew. "Thorn---"
"I get it, okay? So just fucking go and I'll figure out a way to live without you."
"W-What are you saying?"
Thornton had never thought it was possible to love a woman and wish to strangle her at the same time. "You bitch." He hadn't thought she could be this cruel, but she had to be, the way she was forcing him to spell things out.
Blake couldn't believe what Thornton had just called her. "Excuse me?"
"You heard me," he snarled.
"You called me a bitch?"
"Aren't you?" Only a bitch would dump a man and still want him to declare his fucking love for her.
"You..." Blake was momentarily speechless, unable to believe that she could feel so miserable and furious at the same time. "You're calling me a bitch?"
"Do you want me to say it again---"
She slapped him. "How dare you?"
Thornton's jaw clenched.
"I'm a bitch because I had enough self-respect to end things? Is that it? I'm a bitch because you could no longer play with my feelings---"
"What the fuck are you talking about? I was never playing with your feelings---"
"Stop lying," she cried out. "I know the truth, remember?"
"I know," he roared back. "So if anyone's playing..."
Thornton stilled.
This...wasn't making sense at all.
"The truth..." He looked at her. "What truth are you talking about?"
"Don't treat me like an idiot! I may be poor---"
"Fuck!"
Blake let out a gasp.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck." Thornton's head was reeling.
Blake couldn't help jumping back when Thornton's dark gaze suddenly swung towards her.
"The truth you were talking about..."
Blake stiffened.
"It's about me being...rich?"
Blake only stared at him, but the look in her eyes spoke volumes.
"Baby..."
"Don't call me that."
"Why not?" Thornton's voice was strangely uneven. "When it's the truth?"
She started shaking her head. "Please, Thorn---"
"When you told me you knew the truth earlier, did you know what I think?" Thornton's lips twisted into a crooked smile. "I thought you were talking about my feelings."
Blake's eyes widened.
"I thought you meant...you knew I loved you."
---and found herself unable to breath.
"And that you didn't welcome my feelings because you were choosing Teller over me."
Blake's knees buckled.
And she started to fall.
But her beloved was there to catch her.
"Thorn." She was crying by the time he swept her up in his arms. "Thorn. Thorn." She couldn't stop saying his name. "Thorn." She wished she could say more. Because there was so much more. So many things she wanted to say.
I'm sorry. I love you. Do you really love me?
But she couldn't.
"Thorn."
His arms tightened around her, and a moment later she realized it was already more than enough.
"It's going to be fine, baby."
His fingers stroked her hair as he carried her back into their home.
"I love you, too."
Epilogue
Thornton held her hand as he walked Blake to her car. It was the same SUV she had driven over a month ago, but this time she knew the truth. Just as she suspected, it was one of his many "spare" cars parked in Laramie, and one Thornton insisted she used instead of taking the bus.
"Thorn?"
That was all the warning he got, and Thornton could only grunt as she laughingly threw herself into his arms.
Looking up at him, she said sweetly, "I love you."
"I love you, too."
"Just you."
"I know."
"Only you."
He stared at her.
"So try not to feel insecure or jealous when..."
His arms loosened its hold all of a sudden, but Blake only laughed and still managed to land on her feet.
"I love you," she told him as she got inside the car.
He grunted.
She poked her head out of the window. "I said I love you."
"I know."
"And?"
"You already know how I feel," he said patiently.
Blake pouted. "But I still need to hear the words."
"You don't."
"Please? Please? Pretty, pretty please?"
"If I tell you now, will you promise not to drive and text?"
"I pro---"
Thornton suddenly bent down, and the rest of her words disappeared in a sweet, hard kiss that had her breathless and wanting more.
He sucked on her lower lip hard before pulling away. "Your promise?"
His girlfriend nodded.
"And Blake?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
She squealed, and he almost smiled at the way she kept giggling as he watched her drive away.
Life was good, he thought to himself as he walked back to the shop. All the heartbreak and misunderstandings seemed to have happened an eternity ago, and that was all thanks to Blake.
He had been ready to bribe and grovel, do anything that night to make sure he would be able to keep her in his life, but instead she had smiled tearily up at him and said, It's like what you said. Everything's going to be fine.
And it had been.
They had made love that night and talked everything out the next day. No fuss. No drama. Because that was just how Blake was.
And after that...
Life became really, really good.
And two hours later, it became a lot better, and it all started with a phone call.
"Hartland Bookshop."
"Thorn."
He recognized the voice right away. "Slade. You're back from Denver?"
"Just today, and...we've got a problem."
Thornton frowned. "Kady?"
"Guess again." The cafe owner's smirk was evident in his tone.
Ah. Thorn's lips pressed together. "I'll be there as soon as I can."
"I'll take the car if I were you," his friend advised.
"That bad?"
"Depends," was all the billionaire said before hanging up.
Thornton flipped the store sign to Closed and was parking his truck outside the cafe a mere ten minutes later. He stepped inside and immediately saw what the problem was.
"You!"
Or rather, the problem saw him.
She waved him to come over, and when he joined her and her friends in their table, Thornton saw right away that
she was absolutely smashed.
"How long has she been like this?" he asked Frankie.
"Longer than I can bear," Blake's friend answered with a shudder, "so if you don't mind...I'll leave her to you?"
"I...um...have to start working, too." Elizabeth quickly got up as well.
The speed with which the two girls left had Thornton blinking.
"You!"
He turned back to his girlfriend.
"You!"
He nearly smiled. "Is that all you can say?"
"Don't you be smart with me, boy."
Interesting.
"I'm the woman you love," Blake said haughtily, "and you should treat me like a queen."
"Is that so?" He was beginning to see why her friends had all been in such a hurry to leave.
She gave him a regal nod. "That's so!"
He leaned back against his seat. "How do I do that?"
"First..." She pointed to his lap and flashed him an approving smile when he obeyed her silent command by scooping her off her seat and depositing him on his lap.
"Good boy."
Someone behind him choked at hearing this, but Thornton didn't mind. No one had ever had the guts to order him around like this, and it was quite...fun.
"Anything else?"
"Mm..." Her gaze narrowed at him. "I think you should fix your tone."
"My tone?"
"It has to be more...suburban."
More choking.
"Do you mean...subservient?"
Blake scowled. "That's what I said!"
"You're right." And this time, he made sure to sound subservient. "I apologize." He raised a brow. "Anything else?"
"Mm...I think I should make things harder for you."
"Whatever you wish, my queen."
"Baby."
"Baby."
"No, no, no." She shook her head. "You should say my queen baby."
There were laughter and choking this time, and a particularly loud groan which sounded very much like Frankie's voice.
"Understood, my queen baby."
"Oh my God." This time, there was definitely no doubting it was Frankie, and she sounded like she was about to throw up in disgust.