“Have you ever?”
“No.”
“We should, then. I’m sure my friends would love to join us.”
“Your friends?”
“You might know them. Michael and Miriam Eicher. And Elnora Schwartz.”
“Yes, I know them.” She nodded, then pointed up ahead. “It’s right there.”
He pulled into the small lot near a picnic area and they got out of the car. “I’m staying with the Eichers.”
“I didn’t know that. Michael is a friend of Silas’s too.”
He grimaced. “Jah, Michael and I have been friends for a long time. Your dad—well, Silas—was part of our group of friends, along with a couple others. Michael and I kept in touch. He’s probably the only one who knew I wasn’t dead from day one. We were both pretty worldly back then.”
“But you didn’t keep in touch with Silas?” She sat on the picnic bench, across from her father.
“No. I didn’t think he’d be able to keep my secret. He was just so…honest. I know, that sounds wrong. It’s a good thing to be honest. Silas has always been a better person than I could ever be.”
“Anyone can be good.” Her voice escaped as a whisper.
“I know. But I wasn’t. Not then.”
“But you are now?”
He shrugged. “I’m trying.”
She stopped licking her ice cream and stared at him. “May I ask you a question, Dad?”
“Sure. Anything.”
“Do you know Jesus?”
“What do you mean by that?”
“I mean, does He live in your heart? Did you ever invite Him inside?”
He frowned. “That doesn’t sound very Amish to me.”
“It’s in the Bible. I’m not sure where, but Mamm and Silas read it to me before.”
“Hm…no, I can’t say that I have.”
“Because Silas said that’s what makes a person good—Jesus. He comes inside your heart and makes you a good person.”
He smiled. “That’s an interesting concept.”
“Will you invite Jesus into your heart?”
He held up his hands and shook his head. “I don’t embrace anything without first studying the validity of it.”
She twisted her lips. “What do you mean?”
“I want to know what I believe. There has to be a reason behind it.”
“Oh, that’s easy. It’s so we can go to Heaven and live forever with God.”
“Like I said, I’ll have to study that.”
“But will you, for real? Or are you just saying that?” She challenged. “Because if you really mean it, I can help you find the verses. I can ask Silas. He’s very smart about the Bible.” A sense of pride washed over her as she said the words.
“Silas is a good man.” He blew out a long breath. “I could never measure up.”
“You don’t have to. I love you just the way you are.”
He studied her carefully. “Do you mean that?”
“With all my heart.”
He moved to her side of the table and opened his arms. She melted into her father’s embrace. “I love you too, Bailey.” His voice sounded shaky to her ears. When she finally pulled back, there were tears in his eyes.
“You know, this just might be the best day of my life.” He pressed his lips to the side of her prayer kapp.
Bailey decided it was definitely one of hers too.
FOURTEEN
Josiah dropped Bailey off just beyond the end of the Millers’ long driveway, then waited back until she was safely inside her home. He still couldn’t get over how well his reunion with his daughter had gone. He hadn’t been in the habit of talking to God, but if there ever was any time to give thanks, it was tonight.
He was a blessed man. A blessed father. And he knew he didn’t deserve any of it.
He couldn’t wait to share his news with Nora. She’d told him that she’d be praying. God must’ve heard her prayers.
He didn’t know what he’d been expecting to happen with Bailey, but tonight had exceeded any scenario his mind could have conjured up. He actually had a real relationship with his daughter. From this point on, both of their lives would change.
~
Bailey slipped through the door and attempted to tiptoe to her room unseen.
“Bailey? Is that you? Are you home?” It was Mamm.
Busted. “Jah, I’m home now.”
“Come sit at the table with Dat and me,” Mamm called.
She sighed, then did as bidden.
“You were out late,” Silas said.
“Not really. It’s only ten.”
“It’s later than usual for a night when there is no young folks’ gathering. Where were you?”
“I went out for ice cream.”
Her parents looked at each other.
“Ice cream? Who were you with?”
“I’d rather not say.” She stared at the floor. Then her hands. Anywhere but at her folks.
“Bailey.” Silas sighed. “You and Timothy are not supposed to be seeing each other.”
“I know.” She’d let them believe it was Timothy. She wouldn’t say who it was unless she was asked directly.
“Do you remember what we talked about the other night? Bailey, we’re trying to guide you the best way we know how, but if you go against our advice…” Silas frowned. “We just don’t want to see you hurt.”
“I know.” Maybe if she changed the subject, her folks would direct their thoughts elsewhere. It was worth a shot anyway. “Dat, remember when we were talking about having Jesus in your heart? And you said that when Jesus comes into your heart, He makes you good?”
“Jah. You have the righteousness of Christ.” He glanced at Mamm and smiled slightly.
“That’s in the Bible, right?”
“It is.”
“Could you maybe show me where?”
“Certainly.” He nodded. “Let’s go into the living room and sit on the couch. My Bible is on the table in there. Why don’t you get yours too, and maybe a pen and notebook?”
“Okay.” She rushed to her room, happy that she hadn’t only distracted her folks from her tardiness, but that she would be getting something she could share with her father. She hurried back into the living room and joined her folks on the sofa.
Silas grinned. Bailey loved that her stepfather loved studying the Bible. Any time she needed answers, she could go to him and he usually knew. If he didn’t, they would study together until they found the answers they were looking for.
“Let’s just start with these verses, which talk about Jesus dwelling inside of believers.” He looked up from his Bible. “First John 4:4. I’ll just read the second part.”
She wrote down the reference and poised her pen to write the words he’d read.
“Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.”
“Ach, I like that one.” She smiled.
“Revelation 3:20. Behold, I stand at the door, and knock; if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.”
She hurried to jot it all down in her notebook.
“And I’m going to let you look these other ones up on your own, but I’ll give you the references. Romans chapter eight, the whole chapter is awesome. Romans 3:22 talks about having God’s righteousness. So does Philippians 3:9. Second Corinthians 13:5. Ephesians 3:17. Colossians 1:27. And I’m sure there are others, but that’s plenty for now.”
She couldn’t wait to look all these up and share them with Dad.
~
Nora had a feeling Josiah would be stopping by this evening. She’d purposely stayed up later than usual tonight. The girls had already been sleeping a few hours. She checked the clock again, then decided she’d put on some water for tea. She didn’t need coffee. That would keep her alert until morning and then she’d be worthless tomorrow.
Her heart did a somersault the moment she saw the vehicle’s lights flash on the wall thr
ough the curtain. He’s here.
She pulled a sweater from the hook near the door and stepped out into the balmy air. Josiah hastened his steps toward the house, toward her. Instead of greeting her with a hello, he practically sprinted toward her, then lifted her off the ground, spun her once, and let her down again.
She caught her breath. “Goodness, I’m guessing it went well then?”
He stepped back, his eyes sparkling. He leaned forward and embraced her again, then pressed his lips to her cheek. “Denki for praying. Ach, it went wunderbaar!”
“You’re slipping back into Deitch, you realize that, don’t you?” She laughed. “I’m happy it went well.”
“Better than I ever imagined, Nora! We talked, we connected, we hugged each other and said ‘I love you.’ It was probably the best day of my life.” His eyes moistened.
“Wow, Josiah. That really is wunderbaar!”
“Let’s go inside?”
“Yes.” She opened the door and he followed her inside. “I put on some water, if you’d like a cup of tea.”
“That sounds perfect.”
“Do you like peppermint?”
“I love peppermint. That’s what my mom would make all the time back in the day.”
“So, what are you going to do now? What’s the next step?” She gestured for him to take a seat at the dining table.
“Bailey wants to spend time with me so we can get to know each other better.” He practically radiated light, he was so vibrant.
“That’s great. I bet you’re happy about that.”
“I’m ecstatic. I didn’t even know if she’d want to see me. Or I thought maybe she’d chew me out like her mom did.”
Nora gasped. “Kayla chewed you out?”
“In a manner of speaking, yes. But I can’t blame her.” He shook his head. “She thought I was dead, then all of a sudden she receives a letter from me a week before she’s about to marry Silas. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“What did your letter say?”
“Just that I was alive and I found out that we had a child and if she didn’t want to become Amish that I would help her raise our child. I was too late.”
“I’m sorry.”
He shrugged. “I guess things happen the way they do for a reason. I just wish I wouldn’t have given up my daughter so easily.”
“It seems like Bailey is pretty understanding.” She removed two mugs from the cupboard and slid one to him, along with a tea bag.
He nodded his thanks. “Yes. And forgiving. Ah, she’s such a great girl. I missed out on so much, not knowing her.”
“Well, there’s no sense dwelling on should-haves and would-haves. You start right here, right now, and you make the best of it.” She poured water into each of their mugs, placed a saucer over them to steep, then finally placed the honey and a spoon on the table, and sat down.
He reached for her hand. “I love that you’re so practical.”
She’d take his declaration as a compliment. Practicality was a good thing, right? “What do you plan to do now?”
“Just spend time with my daughter, I guess. I told her that we probably need to let her parents know that I’m here. Sooner rather than later. I don’t like that she’s going behind their backs.”
She tried to ignore the delightful sensation that filled her as her hand rested in his. He didn’t mean anything by it, so she shouldn’t read anything into it. Just like she shouldn’t read anything into how he’d embraced her and spun her around and grazed her cheek with a kiss. It was just excitement on his part, adrenaline from his time with his dochder. Plain and simple. “Are you going to visit them?”
“Since Bailey’s the one who contacted me, I’m kind of letting her take the wheel. She’ll tell them when she’s ready.”
“You realized that once that all happens, word will get out that you’re still alive. You won’t be able to hide anymore.”
“Yeah, I know. I should probably make a trip to Pennsylvania before too long. It would be better if my parents heard it straight from me.” He released a heavy sigh.
“That sounds like it might be a difficult task for you.”
“No doubt about that. I mean, I can only imagine how my parents are going to react after thinking I’ve been dead for the past eighteen years. But if that’s what I need to do to have Bailey in my life, then I’ll do what it takes.”
“I’ll be praying for you.”
“Thank you, Nora.” He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her fingers. “I’m certain it was your prayers that paved the way for my time with Bailey this evening. You seem to have a connection.”
She shook her head. “No more than anyone else. Doesn’t God answer your prayers?”
“I don’t…I haven’t really prayed in a long, long time.”
She gasped, instinctually pulling her hand away. She grasped for the honey, to recover. “Ach, I…I don’t know what to say to that.”
“When I left the Amish, I left all that behind me, including the religious part.” He clasped his hands together on top of the table.
“I can’t even imagine not talking to Der Herr throughout the day, not thanking Him for the blessings He bestows on me every day.” Sadness washed over her.
“Bailey tried to talk to me about the Bible tonight.” He smiled, but it morphed into a grimace. “It looks like Silas has done his job well.”
A thought occurred to her. “You didn’t try to sway her against it, did you? Because Jesus said it is better for a millstone to be tied around a person’s neck and that they be cast in the sea than to offend the little ones.”
“No, I wouldn’t do that. At least, I don’t think I would.” He took the plastic honey bear she offered and added a little to his tea, stirring the hot beverage to dissolve the honey. “I just told her that I like to study things out before I embrace them as truth.”
“Is that true?”
“Jah, why?” He sipped his tea.
She shrugged. “You do that with everything?”
He chuckled. “Pretty much. I’m a huge skeptic. I think one has to be in this day with so many scammers and liars out there.”
“You make a gut point.” And she was okay with that, she realized. Didn’t Der Herr say that if one sought after Him they would find Him, if they searched with all their heart? Gott, please show Yourself to Josiah. Maybe He already was.
He pulled out his cell phone and stared at it. “Bailey’s supposed to call me when she wants to meet up next. Judging by her enthusiasm tonight, it probably won’t be too long.”
“You don’t think she’ll be calling tonight, do you?”
“Nah, just wishful thinking, I guess.” He chuckled. “Until then, I’m all Sammy’s. I’m sure he has plenty of projects for me to do around the farm.”
“You know he does.”
He drained his tea in one gulp. “I should let you get some rest before the little angels awaken.”
She smiled. “They sure do look that way when they’re sleeping.”
He stood. “Thank you for everything. The tea, the conversation. It’s nice having a listening ear.”
“I enjoy our time together.” She followed him to the door.
He stopped and turned to her. “Yeah, me too.” His hand moved to caress her earlobe, then his fingers slid down her kapp string. “Nora…” His eyes flashed with something. Longing, maybe?
She dipped her head slightly, then lifted her gaze to his.
“I might—” He ceased talking when his arm slipped around her waist, his other hand was at the back of her kapp. He leaned down, but he didn’t kiss her cheek this time. No, his mouth went straight to her lips, moving ever so gently over them.
She grasped a fistful of his shirt, pulling him taut against her. Her fingers tantalized the hair at the nape of his neck, as she tilted her head slightly and he deepened the kiss. His hands massaged her neck, moving down her back, pressing her to him, then moved to her kapp, feeling for the straight pin that
held it in place.
She felt her hair tumble down her back and around her shoulders, his fingers entangled in it.
His mouth moved to her jawline, her earlobe, her neck. “Nora…” His breath was heavy, his gaze dreamy. “We can’t…we shouldn’t…” His mouth returned to hers.
She realized that if she didn’t force herself away, Josiah might not be returning to the Eichers’ tonight. Ach, but she’d missed being married. Having strong arms holding her close at night, or anytime, for that matter. She missed the excitement, letting passion roam where it willed. She missed the companionship of a husband.
But Josiah was not her husband, although he was behaving very much as a husband would with his fraa. As a matter of fact, Josiah was an Englischer, who never even expressed an interest in becoming Plain again. What on earth was she doing? This would only lead to heartache.
“Josiah, no.” She finally broke away. “We can’t do this. You’re not even—you’re Englisch.”
His hair was disheveled along with his clothes. He moved back but desire burned in his eyes. “I want you, Nora.” His voice came out husky.
“Then marry me,” she whispered.
He released her completely. Like he’d grabbed a hot potato and burned himself.
Tears shimmered in her eyes. She already knew what his response would be. She’d been fooling herself to think that they could actually have something real and lasting.
He shook his head. “I can’t.” He balled his hands into fists. “I’m sorry, Nora. We never should have…” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I should go.”
Nora watched in dismay as he practically ran out the door to his car. Like he couldn’t get out of her presence quickly enough.
It wasn’t until he’d zoomed down the road, until the lights from his vehicle faded from view, until the dust had cleared, that she allowed her tears to fall freely.
~
Way to go, Josiah. He was an idiot, plain and simple. How many times had he told himself he was not going to kiss her? Was. Not. And then he went and did it. And it was way worse than he ever imagined. Or, to be more accurate, way better than he ever imagined.
And now…what on earth was he going to do? She wanted marriage. She expected marriage—and she should. An amazing woman like Nora deserved to be loved fully and completely. But he wasn’t the right person. He wasn’t even Amish. And he didn’t even know if he could be Amish again. Because becoming Amish again would mean he’d have to agree to submit to the gazillion rules of the Amish church that had no rhyme or reason. Exactly what he fought so hard to get away from. He wasn’t going back.
The Drifter (Amish Country Brides) Page 8