Richard loosened his collar. Was it getting hot in there? “Uh, I’m not sure you want the answer to that question.”
“If I didn’t want it, I wouldn’t have asked.”
“She’s a former, uh…”
“Lover?”
“I didn’t want to use that word.”
“But that would be the correct one, right?”
He nodded once.
“And you’re dating her now?”
Richard’s brow shot up. “Now? No, of course, not,” the words shot out faster than the car that had just passed them.
“I don’t understand.”
“Truthfully, this is what happened. Amber called me up and asked what I was doing. She asked if I wanted to meet with her and I agreed. Any door that God opens for me to share His love with someone who doesn’t know Him, I walk through it.”
“I don’t know how I feel about that.” She stared out the window.
Richard sighed. “Mattie, if you’re looking for a perfect guy, I’m not him. The guy you met was the guy with Jesus in his heart. But I haven’t always had Jesus. I have a past – a pretty dark one, honestly. Before I got saved, I was a child of the devil. I behaved like a child of the devil. If you want someone who has been pure his whole life, I can assure you that it is not me. I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed you.”
“I just thought…”
“That I’ve always been a good guy? I’m flattered, but it’s not true.”
“But you never said anything about it before.”
“Honestly, I’d like to leave the past where it belongs – in the past. My former life is not something I’m proud of. I thank God every day for saving me out of that life. He’s been good.” Richard reached for her hand. “Mattie, I know I don’t deserve someone like you. You’re special.”
Mattie sat quietly for the remainder of the drive to church, and Richard was dying to know what she was thinking. He really wished she’d say something. Had he blown his chances with her by telling her about his past? Was this the end of their budding relationship?
God, if this is the end of Mattie and me, please give me the grace to get through it.
Chapter 23
“Okay, so you said you had bad news for me?” Mattie tasted the metal in her mouth, a common occurrence when grinding her teeth.
Richard peered at her over his open menu. “You want to discuss this now?”
“Why not?”
“I guess there’s no time like the present.” He set his menu on the table next to his drink. “Ryan’s coming home.”
“Jackie’s husband?”
He nodded. “You’ll need to find another place really soon.”
“Wait a minute. If this is a proposal, I’m totally not ready for it.”
“Proposal?” His flummoxed expression told her it was anything but that.
“Never mind.”
Richard chuckled.
“I just made a fool out of myself, didn’t I? That was embarrassing.” She felt her cheeks darkening. “Can we just rewind and delete that thoughtless statement I just made?”
“That’s what I love about you, Mattie; you just speak what’s on your mind.”
“You do?”
“Very much so.”
“Even if I just made a fool out of myself?”
“I thought it was kind of cute actually – you proposing to me,” he teased.
She tossed her cloth napkin in his face. “I did not!”
Richard laughed. “Seriously, though, about your living situation…”
“I hate apartment-hunting.”
“I know how you feel. The last time I typed in ‘cheap apartments in New York City’, I think my computer laughed at me.”
Mattie smiled.
“I do have some good news.” Richard nodded to the waitress, and they placed their order.
“You do?”
“Remember the lady that I told you about at church?”
“The one who rents out rooms in her duplex?”
“Yes, that’s the one. She just informed me at church today that she and her husband purchased a small apartment complex. They’re looking for responsible renters.”
“How much?”
“That, I’m not sure of. But I know it won’t be terribly expensive. If you could find someone else who would share the cost of rent with you, I think you’d be able to afford it quite easily.”
“I know there are always young college students looking for places to rent, but I don’t know how responsible they’d be at keeping up with payments.”
“Pray about it and see if God won’t open up a door for you.”
Mattie smiled. “I think I’ll do that.”
<><><>
Mattie glanced up from her meal and saw a familiar young man walking toward their table. Where had she seen him before?
“Richard?” The man thrust out his hand.
Richard quickly wiped his mouth with his napkin and greeted the man. “Carson. Hey, great to see you.”
“You, too.”
Richard grinned broadly. “Mattie, have you met Carson? He just started attending church a couple of months ago.”
“No, I don’t think so. Nice to meet you,” she said.
“Richard led me to the Lord a few weeks ago.” The man beamed. “Let me tell you, Richard. It’s been a little rough, just like you said. But I’m hanging in there.”
“Your friends giving you a hard time?” Richard’s knowing look said he’d been through a similar situation.
“My girlfriend, actually.” He frowned.
“I’d be willing to speak with her, if you’d like,” Richard offered.
“Oh, no, she’s definitely not ready for that. She won’t even give me the time of day regarding the Lord.”
“I know exactly how you feel.” Richard nodded in understanding. “I’ll pray for her.”
“I really appreciate that, man. I need all the help I can get.”
“Carson, would you like a little advice?” Richard asked.
“Sure. Shoot.”
“Sometimes what we want doesn’t always line up with what God has planned for us. He might have something better in mind than you have for yourself.”
“I hear you.” He nodded.
Richard looked at Mattie. “And then sometimes God surprises us and does give us what we want.”
Carson looked from Richard to Mattie. “I’m sorry, I forgot your name.”
“I’m Mattie.” She locked eyes with Richard across table and smiled. “Richard’s girlfriend.”
“It was good meeting you. I’d better let you two finish your meal.”
“Goodbye, Carson.” Richard waved as Carson walked away.
Mattie felt his eyes on her, but she pretended to ignore him.
“Girlfriend? Does this mean–” Richard’s gaze turned sober.
“Yes, Richard. That’s exactly what it means.”
Mattie smiled as Richard bowed his head and, no doubt, whispered a brief prayer of thanksgiving.
Chapter 24
Dear Mattie,
I’ve made my decision. I’m coming! Please pray that I don’t lose my nerve. If all goes well, I’ll be leaving Sunday night after everyone has gone to bed. I’m so excited! And scared. I’ll see you at your apartment soon, if God wills.
Lis
THE END
A sneak peek at
Amish by Accident
J.E.B. Spredemann
Prologue
Elisabeth Schrock yawned as Minister Fisher’s voice droned on and on about how he deemed it necessary for their Amish youth to flee from the things of the world. You’ve got to be kidding, right? His boys are some of the most unruly in our district. He must be preaching to his own kinner. It took everything she had to not snicker and roll her eyes. Of course, his twins were in Rumspringa just as she was. I’ve heard all this before. It’s always the same old thing. The world is wicked; we must live by the rules of the Ordnung…blah, blah, blah. Her
discontentment and restlessness had been growing daily, along with her rebellious attitude. She was sure that if she had to sit through this for another Sunday, she would burst.
She reached inside her hidden apron pocket and clutched the letter she’d received from her best friend, Mattie Riehl. Mattie left her conservative Mennonite community a year earlier and now worked in a fancy skyscraper in New York City. She said she’d met a wonderful Englisch beau and is happier now than she’d ever been. Mattie encouraged Elisabeth to come visit and even offered to share her apartment if she decided to stay long-term. Oh, how she longed for freedom! She was aching to escape the monotony and endless rules and restrictions of the church. I’m going to do it! She decided resolutely.
A cough drew her attention to the men’s side of the room. She glanced up to see her handsome beau, Luke Beiler, looking at her curiously. He must’ve sensed her musing and raised his eyebrows in question. How am I going to leave Luke? He’s ready to join the church and be baptized, but I just can’t do it right now. There’s too much out there that I haven’t seen or experienced. I know that if I agree to be baptized this fall with Luke, he’ll ask me to marry him. Elisabeth hung her head. Indeed, leaving would be the most difficult decision of her life. Nevertheless, she was determined to do it. Today.
<><><>
Leaving his hot coffee, Luke stood up from the breakfast table when Jacob Schrock beckoned him to the porch outside. It was indeed strange for Elisabeth’s brother to be visiting on a Monday morning, with all the chores he had to tend to and what not. But Jacob’s sober countenance gave pause for concern. His friend held out an envelope to him. It was Elisabeth’s handwriting. For Luke. He searched Jacob’s face for a sign as to what the contents might be, but Jacob kept his gaze on the wooden boards beneath his feet. Without a word, Luke opened the letter that would forever change his life.
Luke,
I’m sorry. I just don’t feel like I belong here with the Plain people in Paradise anymore. Whether I will come back or not, I do not know. Please do not try to find me.
Elisabeth
Heartbroken. It was the only word that could describe Luke Beiler as he let Elisabeth’s letter slip through his fingers onto the hard wooden floor. All his hopes and dreams for the future, dashed into a million pieces with just a smidgen of ink on plain white paper.
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Englisch on Purpose (Prequel to Amish by Accident) Page 11