by Lauren Smith
“Don’t be. I’m not.” He grasped her waist and held her back. “She’s happy and I’m happy for her.” His gaze turned playful. “What about you? Share your X’s and O’s.”
“I…don’t have much to tell. I dated a few men and it’s never been serious.”
“Why not?” he asked.
She paused, thinking it over. “Serious is scary. Really scary. I don’t know if I could surrender my life and happiness over to someone else like that. And the men I dated never seemed to love me the way I loved them. It’s made me gun shy, I guess.”
Matthew reached up to toy with a damp lock of her hair. That was one of a dozen things she loved about him: how he made her feel cared for with all those small touches, those little strokes or playfully intimate moments like this. He wanted to touch her and wanted to be with her.
“When you’re really in love, it’s not about surrendering; it’s about sharing.”
She wished she could explain to him that it never felt like that with those other men. She always felt they would take part of her away, a part she wouldn’t know how to get back. That was terrifying. So she avoided love, avoided relationships, and focused on work. Meeting Matthew had made her want to change all of that though. And that scared her too.
“Are we talking about love?” she asked, her heart battering against her ribs.
“Maybe.” He still held her in his arms as she trembled. “Whatever this is, let’s not worry or rush. Let’s take our time.”
He sounded so calm, so casual, but she wasn’t. She planned her life down to every detail when she could. The moment she felt herself starting to go down a rabbit trail of worries, he raised an eyebrow as he studied her expression and gave her arms a gentle squeeze before his eyes lit with fresh excitement.
“Let me take you out on the town. I want to show you the bar.”
“But I’ve been to the bar.” She chuckled and tilted her head, watching him.
“Not like this. I want you behind the bar making cocktails with me.”
“Really?” She had to admit the idea being behind the bar with him sounded really sexy and fun. “Will your boss be okay with that?”
Mathew bit his bottom lip, hiding a smile.
“What?”
“My boss won’t mind.” He bent his head and kissed the tip of her nose. “But first, I’m making you an X’s and O’s drink.”
“Day drinking is going to be a problem with you isn’t it.” She laughed. “What’s in this one?”
“Some Patron XO, bitters, ginger bear, lemon juice, and a little cinnamon- orange blossom syrup.”
Aubree laughed. “I swear you’re making up these drinks.”
He mockingly scoffed as though offended. “I would never! Google it, honey.”
“Okay, Mr. Cocktail.” She snickered.
“Mr. Cocktail?” He raised a brow and smirked. His arousal pressed against her abdomen through their towels.
“I’ll show you a co”
She slapped a hand over his mouth to silence him and they both burst out laughing.
“I think we’d better get dressed or we’ll never leave my apartment.”
“I’ll go change at my place. Meet you outside the hall in half an hour?”
“Sounds good.” She stood on tiptoe and brushed her lips over his before she pushed him out of her bathroom and closed the door.
When she heard him chuckling on the other side, she leaned back against the closed door and sighed with a silly smile painted on her face. She liked Matthew way too much. What if he broke her heart?
Please don’t let this be a mistake…
6
Dropping the Gloves
An hour later Matthew walked with Aubree toward Millennium Park. They meandered through the beautiful snowy pathways on their way to the skating rink that was built into the center of the park during the winter. At the moment, a hundred people were out on the ice skating slowly in graceful circles.
“You ever skate here?” he asked.
“No.” Aubree blushed as she looked from him to the rink. “I don’t actually know how.”
“Then I’ll teach you.” Matthew led her toward an indoor stand that rented skates.
“Oh, I don’t know…” She hedged.
“What’s the worst that could happen?” Matthew played with her hands, lacing his fingers through hers.
She brushed her hair back from her face. “Well… I could fall on my butt and everyone would laugh?”
Matthew pulled her close, sliding his hands into the back pockets of her jeans as he held her against him and leaned down to whisper in her ear. “Then I fall with you and we laugh at ourselves. No big deal.”
He could see the fear in her eyes, the fear that she couldn’t plan or control this, but she needed to learn that life sometimes went off course and a person couldn’t plan for everything.
“Okay.” She still looked uncertain, but he kissed her and led her over to the stand where he paid for two pairs of skates. His were large and black; hers were dainty and snow white. They sat down on one of the bench areas by the rink’s edge and changed out of their shoes. After leaving their shoes secured in a little locker, they made the awkward march on the skate blades together toward the ice. He told her that he’d played ice hockey in his youth, so he could help her stay steady and teach her how to skate.
He stepped backward onto the ice and held out his hands like he wanted to coach a newborn foal into walking at his grandfather’s ranch.
“Come on, Aubree. You can do this.” He waited as she placed her gloved hands in his.
“Keep your body weight balanced over your leading foot. Think like a penguin, okay?”
“A penguin?” She stared down at the ice beneath her skates with adorable skepticism.
“Yes, those little fellas in the tuxedos.” He teased her and she looked up at him, smiling but still nervous. “They shuffle and keep their weight balanced, their center of gravity over their sturdiest weight-bearing foot at a time. Humans slip on the ice because we are used to putting our weight on the foot stretching way out ahead or behind us. So be a penguin, love.”
He held her hands as she shuffled away from the safety of the rink’s walls. He continued to skate backward, using his body’s momentum to pull her along with him. The moment she got more confident, he could see the tension release from her body as her face relaxed. Her pursed lips softened as she breathed deeply and small clouds puffed out in the cold air. Snowflakes began drifting down here and there, growing thicker and thicker until people around them started laughing and pausing to catch the thick flurries on the mittens.
Aubree focused on her skating and Matthew kept her hands in his as she grew bolder and bolder.
“That’s it. See? You’re a natural.”
Her lips were moving slightly as though she were talking. When he realized she was saying “be a penguin” over and over under her breath, he burst out laughing.
“Shut up!” She laughed too and almost stumbled. He immediately caught her, steadying them both. She tensed in his arms, but he rubbed her back to calm her again.
“You fall, I fall.” He reminded gently and she buried her face in his chest. He smiled and wrapped his arms more fully around her before he pressed his mouth against the soft auburn crown of her hair. She smelled of vanilla and honeysuckle from the shampoo and conditioner in her bathroom. His smell matched hers since they had shared the bathroom this morning, but it was different than when it mixed with her natural scent of fresh and clean mixed with the snowy breezes coming in off the lake.
They skated for another half an hour until he could see her legs were shaky from exhaustion. Skating required use of specific muscles and since she’d never skated before, he knew she would be sore tomorrow. It was nearly lunchtime when they changed out of their skates and left the park.
“You hungry?” he asked as he reached for her hand and they walked toward the street.
“I could eat,” she said with a relaxe
d grin. “That was fun. I’m glad you talked me into it.”
“Me too.” The snow was still falling and the air felt colder. Matthew wanted to take her someplace cozy and warm.
“You ever eaten at Park and Field restaurant?”
“No, but I’ve heard it’s good.”
“You’ll love it.” He hailed a cab to take them to Logan Square.
Park and Field was a local family-owned restaurant that featured classic farm to table cuisine. It reminded him of his grandparents’ farm with the fresh food, the locally brewed craft beers, and the comfortable spaces to dine and drink. There was a large fireplace and dozens of deep leather sofas to sit in comfortably for hours. Upon arrival, Matthew chose a roughhewn wooden table close to the fire and the waiter brought them menus.
“Everything is good here,” Matthew said when he saw her carefully studying the menu. When the waiter returned, he ordered a French dip sandwich and Aubree ordered a pan roasted chicken sandwich.
The man waiting on them wrote down their order and asked, “Anything to drink besides water?”
“What’s your recommendation Mr. Cocktail?” Aubree asked Matthew.
He grinned. “Dropping the Gloves.”
“Um…” Aubree glanced back at the drink menu. “Dropping the Gloves, then.”
“Same for me,” Matthew said.
Once the waiter left Aubree looked back at the menu.
“So, Russian vodka, apple cider, cinnamon simple and ginger beer?”
“Yep. I hope you like it.” He had a feeling she would.
“Me too.” A crimson blush stained her lovely cheeks.
“So, no real boyfriends. Nothing serious?” He continued their earlier conversation.
“Not really.”
“And the dating app, it’s been unsuccessful?”
“So far, I just wish…” She hesitated.
He didn’t press her and didn’t push for answers. He wanted her to feel comfortable enough to talk in her own time.
“Why is it so easy with you?” she suddenly asked.
“Is it?” He hadn’t wanted to assume, but it was easy—amazingly easy to be with her.
“It is…” She seemed to still be puzzling that over in silence when their drinks and food arrived.
“Maybe that’s a good thing,” he said with one small, but utterly sweet, smile.
“Maybe so,” she replied.
As they ate, he peppered her with questions about her life. She was an only child but had a dozen cousins from her parents’ siblings and most of them still lived in Maine.
“The holidays are loud but fun. Never a dull moment.” She added with a bemused look. “How about you? Your grandparents raised you, right? But no cousins?”
“None,” he said with a rueful smile. “When I went to England for University, I met an American and we became like brothers. But we’re nothing alike. He lives here in Chicago. You have to meet him soon.”
“What does he do?” Aubree asked between bites of her sandwich.
“He’s in the bar and restaurant business. We have similar tastes and interests.” Matthew finished his French dip sandwich and polished off his cocktail. Between the vodka cider drink, the warm fire, and Aubree, he really had no desire to go anywhere. He could have stayed here with her forever, drinking good cocktails and just talking.
“Want to play a board game or something?” He nodded at a stack of used boardgames sitting nearby.
“Sure, I haven’t done that in ages.” Aubree went over to the table and sorted through the games. She returned with one under her arm called Masterpiece which involved looking at famous works of art and trying to guess their value by bidding against one another at auctions.
“No checkers or chess?” He teased.
“I’m not great at either of those,” she admitted. “I don’t like games that involve a ton of planning and strategy. This one,” she tapped the cover of masterpiece. “It is one of my childhood favorites.”
Matthew ordered two nonalcoholic apple ciders while they set up the game. As they played, he realized quickly Aubree knew this game very well.
“I think…” He grinned. “You rigged this so you can win.” He tugged her by her waist onto the leather couch by the fire.
“Maybe,” she admitted with a devious chuckle that made his heart melt and his body tighten with sexual hunger. She relaxed into his hold as he settled her on his lap.
“Enjoying the day so far?”
“Yes, definitely.” She gazed at his lips and he was completely riveted. She was perfect. Perfect in a way that Lena hadn’t been. He didn’t know what to make of that. Strangely, it made him nervous because he was far from perfect.
“What’s the matter?” she asked quietly while she smoothed his brow with her fingertips as though trying to banish his worries.
“You’re so perfect,” he said quietly. “And I’m worried that when you realize I’m not…”
Her nose wrinkled adorably. “Not perfect? Okay, what’s the worst thing about you?”
“I leave clothes everywhere. I can’t cook at all. And I’m pretty sure I could burn the water.”
“That would be called boiling.” She cut in with a giggle. “I can’t cook either. Maybe we could take a cooking lesson together if you want?”
“I’d like that,” he replied and traced his thumb over her bottom lip and her cheek. There was a calmness to the moment. It felt strangely infinite, as though this peace and serenity between them could somehow last beyond their final breaths. This moment would still be here long after they were gone. He could only hope that what he felt for her right now would last too.
“Don’t take this the wrong way but I’m glad your dates sucked because it gave me the chance to meet you.” He wanted to get on his knees and thank all those idiots who’d not seen how amazing she was.
“Me too,” she leaned in and kissed him, soft and sweet. He returned the kiss, holding her safe in his arms as he made a silent vow not to screw up whatever beautiful thing this was. Her lips parted and he drew her breath inside him, overwhelmed by the intimacy that came so easily between them.
After a moment, he broke the kiss, holding her still. “You want to keep me company at the bar for a few hours?”
“Yeah.” She kissed him again before sliding off his lap. They put away their boardgame and paid for the food and drinks before heading back out into the cold streets. Tonight, Matthew wanted to show her his world and woo her in the way he knew best…with love-themed cocktails.
Aubree spent an hour helping Matthew prepare drinks behind the bar along with another bartender named Jenny. Aubree knew she would never tire of watching Matthew in his element with the way he engaged customers and the looks of delight and appreciation as he delivered finished drinks. When he had to mix a cocktail in a shaker, Aubree got a nice view of his muscled arms as he worked. He kept his sleeves rolled up on his shirt and she saw that tanned skin, so golden and enticing. Even in the middle of Chicago winter, he somehow found sunlight. She wondered if maybe his bed lay in front of the tall windows so that when slept during the morning hours, the sun warmed and tanned his skin. She wanted so badly to see if that fantasy was true, and if it was, she wanted to lie down beside him and sunbathe like a cat…after he’d made love to her all night.
“Girl, I’ve seen that look before.” Jenny said as she came over to Aubree and grabbed a tub of fresh lemons to slice.
“Hmmm?” Aubree had to force her gaze away from Matthew and on to Jenny. The other bartender was slender with short, black cropped hair, and she had a few interesting tattoos at the base of her neck that looked like crows in flight. She’d kept Aubree laughing while they worked by sharing stories of Matthew tending the bar.
“Matthew is catnip. He’s irresistible.” Jenny laughed. “And you’ve got it bad for him. I can’t blame you. He’s really good for business. So many women who wouldn’t normally order cocktails come over to the bar just to see him.”
Aubree’s
face flamed. “Does he date the other woman he meets here?”
Jenny patted her shoulder. “No. Not at all. A lot of women have tried to get his attention. One woman even left her panties here at the bar with her phone number scrawled across the ass part with a sharpie.
“Seriously?” Aubree couldn’t imagine leaving her underwear like that in public…for a man.
Jenny laughed. “Seriously, you have nothing to worry about. You’re the first girl he’s let back here too. He really seems to like you.”
Aubree relaxed and when she saw Matthew watching them, he flashed her one of those panty melting smiles before turning back to his customer. When he was done, he came toward her and Jenny.
“Jenny, hold down the bar for a few minutes. I need to unpack some of the beer delivered yesterday.”
“No problem.” Jenny moved to the center of the bar and Aubree kept near Jenny in case she needed help.
A tall, golden-haired man in an expensive three-piece gray suit strode right up to them. He had those bad boy looks like Matthew, but unlike Matthew who turned out to be a total teddy bear inside, she sensed this man was a dangerous heartbreaker.
“Hey Jenny,” the man greeted with a rakish grin.
“Hey boss.”
Boss? Aubree flinched. This had to be Matthew’s employer. She had to get out from behind the bar before she got him in trouble.
“Who’s this?” he asked, his brown eyes settling on Aubree with clear interest. He had the word “player” written all over him.
“This is Aubree, Matthew’s girl.”
“Oh, I’m not.” She hastily left the space behind the bar. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t be here. Please don’t fire him.”
“Fire him?” The man tilted his head as he looked at her. And he seemed to register what Jenny had just said. “You’re Matt’s girl? No kidding! He was telling me all about how he saved you from some real dating disasters. Lucky for you that he was around, eh?” The man chuckled, still smiling. “You’re definitely not the first woman he’s bailed out of a bad date. He’s got a real knack for picking up women stranded on dates.”