Stigmata

by L M Adams

  I told them having sex was a bad idea, but did anyone listen to me? No!

  “This is dumb! No one thinks he’s less than because he likes a little cock. Lilith save my soul.”

  “Aye, Jaevia, aye. I have even offered to be penetrated if it would help matters, to show him how much it does not matter.” He sighs, “I am willing to try anything, my heart grows weary of this battle.”

  “You don’t like sex like that… do you?”

  Lucien shrugs a shoulder, “No, but his happiness in our marriage is my only concern. He will not hear it. He will not allow me to use my mouth on him below the waist or serve his body as a giver in any other way. He calls it… pity sex.” He sighs, “He does not believe he is… worthy.” And there is such sadness in Lucien’s voice it almost breaks my heart.

  I know Jack was dealing with a lot of insecurity, most of it coming from his stepfather shaming him and his love for Matthias. I knew that it would take time before he could start to move past it. But to allow his love for Lucien to be twisted this way? What does it serve? Yet how often have I almost destroyed the ones I love because I wasn’t willing to deal with my issues?

  “You know he’s going to be very difficult. When he feels insecure like this – let’s just say it doesn’t bring out his better nature.”

  “Aye,” he sighs, “it is tedious, but the Bloodsucker must find his path through it in his own way, and if picking fights with me helps alleviate his anxiety attacks, it is a small price to pay.”

  “You’re a good man, Luey.” I smile.

  “Remind me of that, Jaevia. Remind me often.” His eyes flash red, burning with fire.

  My heart drops. “The curse?”

  He nods, “It is… very strong here, getting stronger as midday approaches. As I grow in strength so does the curse. It knows this land and has grieved for it as well.”

  This isn’t going to work, a vampire walking through a desert, a cursed sun demi-god swimming in power, and a goddess in the making that can’t do shit about any of it.

  Jack makes it to the summit of the dune. The skin on his face has begun to crack in some spots, bleeding. The blood dries quickly, leaving streaks of red on his face in a ghoulish mask of blood and golden sand.

  “You don’t have to slow down for me,” he barely manages to say, trying to catch his breath.

  “Aye we do, Bloodsucker. I’m not leaving you behind.”

  “Fuck,” Jack hunches over, placing his hands on his knees.

  Lucien sighs and takes his sword and scabbard off, handing it to me. “You have carried me before, Capaneus.” He whispers gently and places a hand on Jack’s shoulder. “Let me return the favor.”

  “I’m fine.”

  My irritation finally gets the best of me. “Dark Goddess, Jack!”

  “I’m fine!” he screams and falls to his knees at the same time. His shame masquerading as anger taking the last bit of his energy.

  A large gust of wind blows over us, it would be nice if it was a relief, but it just feels like the exhaust from a furnace carrying with it the biting sand.

  Lucien takes a knee beside Jack, “What good is a dead man’s pride?”

  “Fuck.” Jack breathes out.

  Please Jack, please don’t make this anymore of an issue. I silently pray.

  “Let me be your strength as you are mine, I am begging you, Capaneus.”

  Jack lets out an anguished cry as his pride finally dies and he nods.

  Lucien turns around and Jack wraps his arms around Lucien’s thick neck and his legs around Lucien’s waist. Lucien stands with no effort at all, carrying Jack piggyback.

  With Lucien carrying Jack we make better time. The vampire falls asleep of all things… or more accurately, passes out. This sun is draining him faster than anything I’ve ever seen. Almost stripping his power away from him layer by layer. I don’t understand it.

  We walk, and we walk, and every step we take away from the pillars of obsidian I question my decision to move forward. Perhaps we should have stayed. Maybe Tabari found a way to open the portal and is waiting for us right there at the pillars, but now we are long gone, and this hellish desert wind has wiped away the evidence of our steps.

  I’m not even sure we would receive the relief of death; would we simply lay under this sun, being cooked alive with the energy of the cosmos keeping our hearts beating, our minds aware as the sun dried out our flesh and brittled our bones until we were husks of memories trapped in a dry cocoon of flesh that won’t truly die?

  Four days? I’m not so sure we’re going to make it until tomorrow. I concentrate on my magic. I’ve made it rain before, when I was pissed off and emotionally unstable. The sky had darkened and opened up a floodgate. Maybe I can duplicate that if nothing else. Or in trying to use my power… I could set the very earth on fire. There’s just no telling.

  I decide to do nothing, this isn’t the time to experiment. Soon I come to accept that Jack and I will have to rely on Lucien like never before. He holds our lives in his hands completely. Once upon a time that would have bothered me; made me angry and resentful, but today… today I am comforted that I have such a man to rely on and I thank the Goddess above for him.

  63

  Jaevia

  We stopped trying to talk long ago, Lucien advising me to save my strength and talking will only dehydrate me further.

  In the silence, caught in my own thoughts, I can’t help but begin to see the beauty in the nothing of the desert. A place that could make even the mightiest feel small and insignificant. There is no war of emotions boiling inside of me, no whisper of my succubus. My heart follows the rhythm of the nothingness around us and with it a certain peace fills me. Right now every argument I’ve ever had with anyone feels so infinitely pointless.

  Yet none of the newfound peace I feel matters, because my physical body is deteriorating. Tabari always warned me about taking care of my body, that this flesh is still made within the bounds of mortal rules. Yes, a vessel for god power but constructed of bone, and blood, and sinew.

  Lucien does not slow, does not stop to admire the surrounding beauty. He does not pause to enjoy being home, because all he cares about in this very moment is taking care of us. We march on under the burning sky; the temperature is rising steadily as we approach midday. Occasionally a low groan or whimper escapes Jack. But other than that, there is a deafening silence that surrounds us, only broken occasionally by the wind.

  This is the type of place you visit to forget that you even exist. An entire spirt can be swallowed by the emptiness and the everything.

  “Not much further, Jaevia, try to keep up. Capaneus cannot be caught in the heat that will come.”

  I try to muster a bit more energy and hurry to walk beside him instead of dragging my feet a few yards behind him. “Much further to what?”

  “A place of respite. I pray I still remember the way and that it exists in this time.”

  “How can you find your way in this?” There are no markers, or natural landmarks, there is nothing to set a course by.

  He grunts, “I may not have learned how to swim, but I was taught how to navigate and survive in a desert before I took my first steps.”

  I huff, “Before you took your first steps?”

  “I was a very smart baby.”

  The corner of my lips twitch with suppressed laughter… only Lucien could make me smile in a time like this.

  Since talking doesn’t seem to bother him, he gives me a few pointers on navigating the desert… distracting me from my misery.

  “Rule one: never travel the two hours before or after midday.”

  “The heat?”

  He grunts with a nod.

  “But you are a child of Ra.”

  “Aye Wench, for me, it would make no bother, but these rules are for you not for me.”

  “Do as I say, not as I do?”

  “Yes, Wench, like saving your energy and staying quiet.”

  I stay quiet and work on walki
ng in his shadow, it really does help.

  “Rule two: never trust your eyes. The sun distorts things. The dunes change, the land shifts with the winds. But the lines on the dunes, how they form, reflects the direction the wind blows and can guide you.”

  He points out the smooth lines on the dunes, explaining the times of the years and how the prevailing winds blow during those times. It is easier to navigate at night beneath the stars but not impossible to guide our way during the day.

  Lucien gives me rules to live by, ways to make it, but a lot of times, it will come down to a horrid mix of luck and experience. He tells me of stories of caravans that disappear and die in the unforgiving Sahara, only missing an oasis by a few hundred feet.

  It’s why he keeps forcing us to walk at the top of the dunes, trying to spot treetops. He apologizes for the burden, but we cannot make a mistake, and it has been some time since he studied the maps of life under the tutelage of Henenu.

  “My tutor would not relent on teaching me the ways of the sands. His meddlesome ways may save your lives… and I shall never be able to thank him.” The sadness and mourning echoes in his voice.

  “Thank you, Henenu!” I shout suddenly. It makes Lucien stop in his tracks and look at me, eyebrow raised.

  I grin at him, the skin on my lips cracking open anew, “The ones we love are never far.”

  He nods slowly and closes his eyes for a moment, “Thank you, Master Henenu.”

  Perhaps the sun is addling my brain, but I’ve never felt closer to the spirit world as I do now. Perhaps my own spirit has begun to transition from life to death. Or perhaps the veil between the world of the living and the dead is thinner in such a place and such a time.

  Thanking Henenu in this simple way settles something in Lucien and loosens his tongue. I learn much, not only about surviving in a desert, but also about Lucien. This is the most he’s ever talked about his life from before the Kindred. Even telling me about his time with Bomani, the man that cared for him on Ra’suá in a land called Alkebulan, when Henenu sent him to my time to escape the men that killed his mother.

  The time begins to slip between my fingers and my thoughts as Lucien keeps us on a steady pace, the only sound his deep voice breaking through the deep presence of nothing that envelops us.

  “There, Wench.” He says, stopping his steps forward.

  I lift my eyes and see… treetops, honest to god treetops. In the center of this nothingness… is life.

  “An oasis?”

  “Aye, Wench, come, the Bloodsucker’s heart does not beat correctly.”

  We move with purpose after that. Each step puts us closer to this lifeline we so desperately need.

  I want to run; Lucien won’t let me. He says the sun is tricking my mind. The trees seem so very close, but in reality, we’re still pretty far. I try to argue, he yells at me… he didn’t drag us across this desert just for me to go die on him now.

  My body and mind are urging me to run, but I follow his directions and settle back into the even pace he sets.

  He explains the oasis is fed from a massive underground freshwater lake. There won’t be much wildlife outside of insects, fish, birds, and if we’re in luck… crocodile.

  “Why will we be lucky for the crocodile?”

  He grunts, “You will see, now hush or I will spank you later.”

  I sigh, I wouldn’t put it past Lucien to honest to god pull down my pants and give me a spanking in the middle of a desert because I was being naughty.

  Lucien was right, of course. It takes us at least another hour of walking before we reach the oasis. If I’d taken off in a run, I would have collapsed before even getting close. The sun seems to act as a magnifying glass, making things seem closer, fooling your eyes.

  Rule two, never trust what you see or what you think you know.

  64

  Jaevia

  The oasis sits down in a deep valley of sand, around the center of the crystal waters, a proverbial garden of Eden. This would make Kitty lick her chops. Wild and yet contained by the life-giving water in the center of the foliage. The freshwater lake is larger than I expected it to be and so fucking clear it seems you could fall for forever within its depths.

  Large wild date palm trees sprout from the sandy earth and climb into the sky, long grass clings to the edges of the pool of water. Luey gets his wish, there are large crocodiles bathing in the sun. The things are massive; armored scales almost the same color as the sand, strong jaws ready to crush bone and consume a man whole. Short legs, massive tails that look strong enough to kill you with one blow, lizards on steroids.

  “Luey?” I ask, my voice a bit wobbly.

  “I will protect you, hmm? Nothing to fear, where’s my brave Wench?”

  I nod quickly and let him lead me to a large gray boulder further away from the edges of the water than the fucking crocs. As we approach the crocs seem to move away, giving us space – perhaps even crocs fear the wrath of the son of Ra.

  There’s now a clear path to the water and I almost whimper with relief. I take a step forward, ready to dive headfirst into the cooling liquid, but Lucien holds a hand out stopping me.

  “Hold, Jaevia.”

  Instead of taking us to the water he picks a large boulder to set Jack down at, positioning us so that we are in the shade. He leans Jack back against the stone. My vampire lover is completely out of it, his breathing is shallow and fast.

  “Getting him out of the sun is more important than the water right now.”

  I clamp down on my tongue and put Luey’s sword down.

  “Keep watch over him, Jaevia. I will get water and then build a shelter to provide shade. The sun will be over us soon and even this shade will disappear.”

  “Yes, Luey.” I nod and sit down beside Jack, guiding his head down to my lap.

  Lucien strips out of his shirt.

  “Is he going to be okay?” I can’t keep the worry from my voice.

  “Of course, he knows he’s not allowed to die.”

  In this world, Lucien’s words come as a comfort. Who would dare disobey a son of Ra in his homeland?

  Jack whimpers low in his throat.

  “Stay here,” Lucien orders and turns away.

  “Shh, baby. Luey is going to take care of us.”

  Jack’s skin is horrid, it actually looks… cooked.

  Lucien comes back quickly with his shirt in hand, sopping wet with water. He has me tilt my head back as he rings out the shirt, dripping the water into my mouth.

  Lucien hands me the shirt, still filled with water.

  “Pat his skin gently, Jaevia. Do not let him drink yet.”

  “Why?”

  “We need to cool him off first.”

  I nod and begin patting Jack’s face with the wet cloth gently.

  “We do not have much time, I will need to work quickly, and I need your help.”

  “Okay.”

  He grunts and picks up his sword, “Watch over him Jaevia, if his breathing becomes any shallower, tell me immediately. And watch out for scorpions.”

  I nod as Lucien turns away to walk towards one of the larger palm trees near the edge of the water. Jack groans and I begin patting his neck, just trying to cool off his skin.

  The power in the air seems to intensify for a moment and I look up just as wings of fire unfurl from Lucien’s back, his stigmata glowing gold and red even in the heat of the sun. The wings are massive, made of feathered fire that dances on the air with glittering gold. I can’t see his eyes, but I know they would be that same color, burnished gold and filled with power.

  For him to use the power of the curse now, when he was so worried about maintaining control… we must be in dire straits indeed.

  But the world doesn’t set ablaze… any more than it already is, and I relax. So much control, so much man… and he’s my hubby.

  He walks to the base of one of the trees close to the edge of the water. I watch as the wings beat in the air, lifting him from the ground
slowly, until he’s at the top of the wild palm tree.

  The slice of his sword cuts through the warm air echoing with the crack of the branches as he chops the wood letting the massive palm leaves fall to the ground.

  After he’s cleared one tree, then another, and another still, he lands, and the wings of fire disappear as if they were never there. He gathers the large branches and brings them over to me, and Jack, setting them down at our feet. He goes back to the edge of the water and the long grass there, almost disappearing from view. My heart leaps in my throat as I wait for him to appear again. I am fully out of my depth, I can’t keep myself alive in this, let alone Jack.

  There was nothing to worry about, soon Lucien is back with handfuls of long roots that look like vines almost.

  He kneels in the sand in front of me. “Watch, Wench.”

  Soon he’s shown me how to split the roots and strip the fibrous string from them… making lashes so he can tie the branches of the palm tree branches together.

  But not before we weave together the long leaves of the branches. I take over the weaving as Lucien begins building the frame for our shelter with the spines of the palm leaves.

  It’s not something that would hold up in a hurricane, but I start to see where he’s going with this, and it will do much to give us shelter in the sun.

  Lucien is a great son of Atum, the builders, the strength to give fruition to the dreams. Even under the circumstances, there is something elementally sexy and alluring in watching your man build something with his bare hands.

  He moves with purpose, racing against a sun he loves but is killing the ones he cherishes. Another duality of life… our lives.

  “Why couldn’t we just take shade under the tress?”

  He grunts low as he drives one of the large arc frames into the sand. “It would not have been enough. And we do not wish to compete with the wildlife for the space.”

  “I thought you said we don’t have to be afraid of the crocs?”

  Lucien huffs with his usual cockiness, “I am more concerned about the ants.” He nods his head towards Jack, “They’d eat him alive.”