Covering her hand with his, he cupped her cheek, gazing into her eyes. For a guy who said he didn’t like her, he sure was acting like he did. “I just don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I’ll be careful,” she whispered. It was as loud as she could speak since her mouth had gone dry. That small current of air circulating earlier seemed to stall, and the world fell away.
Carlos bent forward and stopped, seeming at war with himself. Dropping his hand from her cheek, he loosened his hold on her and stepped back. At this point, if she wanted chocolate ice cream, she’d have to hit up a different store. “We should probably keep this professional. Polly…”
“I know, and I wouldn’t want to hurt her either.” The words were so bitter on her tongue, but he was right. If something happened, she’d not only lose him but Polly as well. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt either one of them. “Plus, my life is a little hectic right now. I really can’t handle a relationship.” What a big, fat whopper of a lie. Well, the hectic part was true, but she was pretty sure she could handle a relationship with Carlos.
Nodding, he smiled. “Exactly. Polly has prom coming and graduation. I need to be there for her.”
“I understand. We can be friends, though.” Friends? Really? How lame, but it was better than nothing.
“Absolutely.”
Ashton gave a half-hearted wave and slipped into her car. It wasn’t until she couldn’t see him in her rearview mirror that she pulled over and set her forehead against the steering wheel.
There wasn’t a time she could remember wanting a kiss as badly as she wanted Carlos’s. His kind heart, generous nature, and courage were a magnet for her. Meeting that type of man was a one-in-a-million opportunity.
Except, he was right. If something happened and their relationship went south, it would hurt more than them. Polly would be in the middle, and it wasn’t fair to her.
Ashton needed to set aside her selfish wants and think of Polly’s needs. What if she needed someone to confide in? Sure, she had Elise, but Polly needed more than one woman to come to when she was confused or hurt. She needed someone to go bra shopping with.
Taking a long, deep breath Ashton lifted her head. Having Carlos as a friend would make life a little easier. If nothing else, she’d have someone to call if she needed another adult to talk to. This was a good thing. Keeping their friendship was more important, and since she didn’t have any friends at all, one was a good start.
Chapter 14
Sunday morning dawned bright and sunny, and Ashton wore a bright yellow scarf in celebration of a beautiful day. Maybe if Duke saw it, his mood would be a little brighter. More than anything, she didn’t want him on the defensive. She just wanted to check on Lucy. Surely, he’d take that as a good thing. That someone cared.
She had to believe there was goodness and decency in him and that Lucy’s mysterious absence could be easily explained. There didn’t have to be any unsavory business going on. Duke didn’t have to be a monster or even a neglectful parent. He’d just been released from prison, and she had no idea how that could affect someone. Maybe the night of the drunken party was just a fluke.
She held this idea in her head as she knocked on the front door. The house wasn’t in great shape, even without dozens of people hanging out on the porch and littering the lawn with cigarette butts. Monica was a good, conscientious mom, though. She held this in her head, too, as somebody approached the door and opened it.
Duke’s imposing frame filled the doorway to the point that he nearly had to hunch down. “Yeah?” he growled, looking her up and down. Ashton fought against the impulse to duck and run. So much for the benefit of the doubt.
“H-hi,” she stammered. “I’m Ashton Johnson. I run the Brothers and Sisters program.”
He squinted. “Right. You’re the one who had Lucy stay over. Thanks a lot. It was cool to do that.”
“It was no problem. She’s such a great kid, which is why I’m here. I just wanted to check on her.” She raised her voice a little, just in case Lucy could hear, so she’d know somebody cared. “I haven’t seen her in days, and she’s normally one of the kids I can count on seeing.”
“Yeah, well, she’s been busy.” He cocked an eyebrow like he was challenging her to question him. “I don’t like the idea of her being around all those other kids all the time anyway. Her mom’s always harping on that, but we disagree. Now that I’m home, things are gonna be different.”
Ashton’s heart sank. “Oh. I see. That’s a shame—I mean, we’ll miss her. I know I will for sure. She’s a great kid. Do you think I could stop by from time to time just to see how she’s doing?”
“Why?”
Ashton blinked hard, shocked by the question. “Uh, well, because I’ve grown to love her. She’s a sweet little girl with a lot of potential. I’d love to see that potential grow.”
“Yeah, well, I’d love it if somebody who doesn’t have a say in her life would mind their own business,” Duke replied, nearly growling. “And I’d love it if you got off my property.”
Typically, she would have done as he asked, and the more logical part of her brain said to run, but she couldn’t just leave without trying to see Lucy.
“Can I at least see her? So she knows I’m thinking about her? I don’t want her to think I just forgot about her.”
“You need to do as you’re told and get off my property.” He puffed out his chest and pretended to lunge at her. He hadn’t stepped a foot out the door, so she knew he was faking the threat.
“Don’t you care that your daughter was having fun and had friends?”
He leveled his eyes at her, and through clenched teeth, he replied, “Get off my porch, get off my property, and don’t let me see you again!” He thrust an arm out the door, pointing. “Get while you can still walk.”
“That sounds a lot like a threat,” she said in a steady voice, holding his gaze as she backed away with slow, measured steps. “Not a great idea to threaten someone while you’re probably on parole. Keep that in mind, if only for Lucy’s sake.”
He slammed the door as she walked down the steps, and by the time she made it to her car, tears were streaming down her face. How could a father not care about what was best for their child? And now she’d stood up to the man and the likelihood of Lucy ever returning was incredibly slim.
Slipping into her car, she glanced back at the house to find Lucy staring through one of the windows, waving. That, at least, gave her a little peace that she was okay. Although, from this distance, she couldn’t tell if there were bruises or not. But the little girl was alive and breathing, which meant there was still a chance Ashton could see her again.
Ashton raised a hand, touching it to her lips to blow a kiss, hoping the little girl knew she was loved and wanted by at least one person in the world other than her mom.
It broke Ashton’s heart to leave Lucy with a man like that, but there was nothing she could do. She had no proof if he was abusing her, and at this point, nosing around would only make things worse for Lucy. Men like Duke usually took their anger out on the person who caused problems, the ones with the least ability to fight back. She didn’t want Monica facing his wrath either.
Pulling out her phone, she quickly sent a text to Carlos letting him know she’d tried to talk to Duke and was safe. At this point, all Ashton could do was cry and hope that somehow things would work out.
Chapter 15
Carlos knocked on the doorframe of Ashton’s office. In her text, she’d said she was safe, but his gut told him to check on her. Now, he was glad he listened since he was pretty sure she was crying. “Hello?”
Looking up from her desk, she gave him a small smile. “Hi.”
“I got your text, but I had a feeling you might need to talk.” Rather than sitting in the chair across from her, he rounded the desk and perched on the edge. “Are you okay?” Considering her red-rimmed eyes, it was pretty obvious she wasn’t. Still, he figured giving her the option to te
ll him to take a hike was the gentlemanly thing to do, especially since he didn’t know if she was mad at him or not.
He’d nearly messed up the night before after she had dinner with him and Polly, almost kissing her for the second time and then giving her the lame excuse that he needed to focus on Polly. Not that he didn’t, but he should have just told her about the promise he’d made. Except that would have made Polly the bad guy, and he didn’t want that either.
“I feel so bad,” Ashton said before blowing her nose and then tossing it into the overflowing wastebasket by her desk. “I ruined everything. I should never have gone.”
“What happened?”
She explained stopping at the house, just like she’d planned. “Monica wasn’t there. I didn’t see her anyway. That man doesn’t deserve the title of dad. He was awful.”
“Awful how?”
Sniffing, she pulled another tissue from the box and dabbed her eyes. “He yelled in my face and threatened me, but—”
“He what?” The question was louder than he’d planned.
Ashton held a finger to her lips. “The kids,” she said softly.
“Sorry.” He composed himself. “Go on.”
“He made a snide comment. You know. Get out of here while you can still walk.”
Anger built in his chest. “That wasn’t okay.”
“I was on his property.” She sighed. “And he had already asked me to go.”
“Still. It’s not okay to threaten anyone.”
“Something tells me Duke skipped school when they were teaching about manners.” She gave a half-hearted chuckle. “He was so angry, and all I did was tell him that Lucy was missed and that I cared.”
Carlos knew the law. Unless they could prove Duke was hurting Lucy, there was nothing they could do. Not letting his child go to an afterschool program wasn’t grounds for removing Lucy. He was her parent, and he had a right to keep her home.
However, Carlos also knew Lucy had liked being there. She felt safe, obviously, or she wouldn’t have tried to spend the night alone in the building. Ashton had talked about how much Lucy loved spending her afternoons at Brothers and Sisters. It seemed a shame that Duke didn’t take that into consideration.
“Is she still going to school?” Carlos asked.
“I guess so. I could always call to check. Why?”
“I’m just thinking aloud. I mean, if the afterschool program is the only thing she’s missing, that’s not really a reason to step in.”
Her lips turned down, and anger flashed in her eyes.
Carlos held up his hands. “I’m not saying I don’t agree with you or that it isn’t frustrating to see a parent cast aside what might be best for their child.”
Her lips trembled as her anger died. “I know. Doesn’t mean I have to like it.”
“I don’t like it either, and I think you need to stay away from him. He’s bad news. Whatever he’s involved with, you don’t want to be part of it.”
“How do you know what he’s involved with?”
“I don’t for certain.” He shrugged. He’d tried an internet search, but all that came up was his last prison stint. “But it can’t be anything good. People don’t go to prison for smiling too much, you know?”
She shot him a small smile, and then the corners of her lips turned down as her eyebrows knitted together. “True. It just breaks my heart. It’s not fair.” The reason the program was so successful was her inability to give up.
“No, it sure isn’t. Not to Lucy or her friends, but there’s also the other kids in the program. They need you too.”
She nodded, taking a deep breath. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right. I can’t lose sight of the big picture.” She crossed her arms over her chest, squaring her shoulders. “I can’t let them down.”
Man, he loved her fighting spirit. “You’re really something else, you know?”
Ashton raised an eyebrow. “Is that a compliment?”
Carlos chuckled. “What else would it be?”
“I don’t know.” Her hands dropped to her lap as she shrugged. “When my parents would say I was something else, they weren’t always being complimentary.”
As she stood, he stood with her. “I mean it. It takes a special person to do this kind of work.”
A light blush blanketed her cheeks, and she looked at the floor. “You’re just being sweet.”
He leaned in, brushing his lips against her cheek. “I’m being honest.” And he also needed to put some distance between them before the temptation to kiss her overwhelmed him. “Now, where are these boys who need lessons on personal hygiene?”
Nothing like smelly teenage boys to shift his thoughts. If he couldn’t hold Ashton and comfort her, the least he could do was help her with the kids. Maybe it would make her job easier and do the kids some good.
Chapter 16
Wednesday afternoon, a knock rang from the doorway to Ashton’s office. She lifted her head from the invoices she was checking, expecting to see a kid. She’d only just opened the doors, so to speak, with kids trickling in after school to do homework or play basketball.
“Hey,” Ashton said, relief filling her as Lucy’s mom walked in.
Monica cleared her throat, holding up a hand to wave. “I’m sorry to bother you.”
“Not at all!” Ashton practically leaped out of her chair. “It’s not a bother. Please, have a seat. Can I get you something to drink or a snack or anything?” Silly thing to offer, but her mouth was on autopilot. She was so grateful to see the woman.
“I’m okay, thank you. I’m stopping by on my way home from work.” Monica still wore the smock from her job as a cashier at the local supermarket. They’d run into each other there plenty of times. “So I can’t stay long.”
“Of course.” Ashton nodded. So Monica was working the morning shift lately. At least Lucy had her mother there with her in the afternoons. That was good to know. At least her father and his buddies wouldn’t be the ones influencing the little girl.
“I know you stopped by over the weekend, and I would have come earlier, only I had to do it when Duke wouldn’t find out. You really shouldn’t have come to the house,” Monica said as she sat in the chair across from Ashton.
Ashton’s shoulders sagged. How had she not taken into consideration what stopping by could have done to this poor woman. “I’m so sorry if I made things harder for you. I really am. I was only concerned because we hadn’t seen Lucy, and there were no phone calls or explanations.”
“I understand. Really. And I told that to Duke, too. I told him he couldn’t expect Lucy to just quit and no one come by. That you really care about these kids.” She lowered her gaze, fidgeting with her fingers. “He said he’d deal with it if you showed up. I had to work, so…I couldn’t be there.”
“I’m sorry I missed you.” Ashton smiled. “Things might’ve gone a lot better if it was you who opened the door and not your husband.”
“Miss Johnson—”
“Ashton, please,” she said.
“Ashton. My husband has a terrible temper. You don’t want to cross him. I mean it.”
Before Ashton could speak, Monica added, “Not Lucy. I know that’s probably what you were thinking, but he doesn’t hurt her. He doesn’t hurt me…much either. He just yells mostly. I can handle it, though.”
“You shouldn’t have to handle it. That’s abuse, Monica.”
“I’m fine, but you won’t be. Just…steer clear, okay? Please. For everybody’s sake.”
What could Ashton do? How could she help when she was being asked to leave the situation alone? Sure, it was possible Duke wouldn’t ever get physically violent, but the odds weren’t in his favor. A man like that? Eventually, they did, and their families suffered.
“I’m so sorry,” Ashton whispered. “I know how this is going to sound, and I want you to know I’m not asking with any judgment. But why are you still with him if he acts this way? You were doing just fine with Lucy on your own—f
rom the outside, I know, it’s easy for me to say. But if you needed help…”
“I don’t need your help.” Monica sat ramrod straight, holding her purse in her lap. “I don’t need anybody’s help. But my daughter needs her father. Little girls need their fathers.”
Yes, but if that father was a man with a violent temper, one who was involved in activities that had already sent him to prison, what good could it do to have him around?
“I understand, and your business is your business. It’s just…that night Lucy stayed with me, she kept telling me how quiet and peaceful it was. It gave me the impression that maybe things aren’t so peaceful at home.”
“Ashton, like you said, my business is my business. You don’t know anything about my family. You only know what you’ve heard from me and my daughter. Just stay out of it.”
Of course, Ashton was documenting everything and she could report it, but what would she tell the authorities? Suspicions? It would only cause more problems and shut down the little bit of communication she currently had. She didn’t want that. Maybe there was some way she could convince Monica she was on her side.
Ashton sighed. “You’re right, and I’m sorry. I don’t mean any harm.”
“Well, you might not have meant it, but you caused it. He was in a mood for days after that. You can’t come back anymore, understand? That’s another thing I came here to warn you about.” She paused a moment and took a breath. “Lucy is okay. She’s safe, and she doesn’t need any help. You need to steer clear now. He’s…angry with you.”
“Still? I mean, he was good and mad on Sunday—”
“When Duke gets mad, it doesn’t go away. It just simmers. He holds grudges. You don’t want to be in his sights.”
The way she said it twisted Ashton’s stomach in knots. “Okay. And again, I’m so sorry if I caused you any trouble.”
“It’s nothing I can’t handle.” Monica stood, and Ashton followed. “Thank you for taking the time to see me.”
Firefighter's Risk: A Clean First Responders Romance Book Two Page 6