Alice gave a tired smile
- Well, you're not making it easier, right?
- I know... But I just thought I could come back from time to time, you know. Maybe in some time I could come back here in a more definitive way... I don't know. I was just...yeah... thinking I could make Paris my home... I don't know... ahh, whatever...
- ... So why now then? You're basically trying to break them apart. You depend on that to have a chance with her. Wouldn't it be easier to just go away and come back... in a better life context? I mean, do you really think that's the way you want to start a relationship? Breaking a couple apart?
He took a second to digest what she had said.
- M…Maybe... but what about fighting for her? You know? Shouldn't I fight to take her away from that guy before he hurts her even more? Or something poetic like this...
Alice just looked at Eric for a second.
- Well, then you're just assuming she's a child that doesn't deserve respect for her own decisions and that can't take care of herself. That the guy is indeed a jerk and that you just would be so much better for her. What if you're wrong? What if she doesn't want you to do so? What if she doesn't need you to do so? Maybe she needs to realize that by herself...Or maybe you can help her realize that, but you shouldn't just force her to stay with you like that...
Again, Eric needed a second to digest that punch in his stomach.
- … Then I'll just leave if that's the case... - Eric
- Just like that? No problem?
- Yeaah, I guess.
- Wow... sometimes it can be cruel. - Alice
- Sometimes it can be indifferent. - Eric shrugged his shoulders and drank a bit more of tea
- So maybe it doesn't mean everything you think it does...
- … Only if you believe that you need to suffer to truly love someone. I'm completely against this concept.... Love … Love should be easy....or just...easier. Still, I thought I should fight for her...
- Yeah... Hmm... I don't know. Maybe. I don't think that that goes against anything I meant to say. I do believe in a lot of things, about life, love and relationships. Many of these actually pushed me away from several people... I don't like suffering any more than you do, but I do believe that sometimes we have to fight for love... But sometimes we think we are fighting for love while we are actually killing it - Alice
- Ahem... - Pause - Well, I guess it just proves we bring our wisdom in our flesh and bones. - He was quoting someone. He couldn't remember who.
- … Mostly in the scars, yes
They went silent
Finally Alice smiled again and said:
- So, did it help at all? Any plans for the future now that I blew your mind?
- Hmm...I don't know... I don't like to think about the future.
- Interesting...
- Is it? How come?
- Well, I guess it can be something really good, in the sense that you're not an anxious person about the future. So in a way, it must be liberating. You know, the whole concept of “The eternity belongs to those who live in the present”
- No, but I can definitely understand it - Eric
- Yeah, besides, Milan Kundera once said something that I pretty much agree, about how most of the times we are ageless creatures. Which, somehow just came to my mind about this situation, for some reason...
-... Hmm... Wow, that’s really interesting. I'd agree on that. - Eric reflected on that for a while – So, are you a Kundera's fan?
-Yeah, If I can say that... I just read a couple of books from him. You? - Alice
- Yeah, just one... The unbearable lightness of being
- No shit, I read that one too
- Yeah, I have a friend whose name is Tomas, he's been named after that book. Well, we pretty much call him Tom. - Eric
- That's interesting. Just out of curiosity, would you say his personality reflects Tomas’s personality?
- Hmm... I guess you should be the one to judge. I couldn't tell just like that.
- Hmmm… I see.
- Well, but hey, what I wanted to say is that he read more than that from Kundera though.
- I see. Well, if my name had come from a specific author, I'd probably have the same instinct, right? -She smiled - Anyways... what was I talking about?
- I don't know, about the eternity of living in the presence? – Eric smiled
- Oh yeah. No, before that. I was saying that it could be a good thing, but I was just gonna complete that saying that there's also the other side of the coin: It might be something good, but it might be something terrible: Might mean some fear of the future, or maybe too much attachment to the past. In any of those cases, I don't believe in any kind of extremism, anyways. We should think a bit about all of them: past, present and future. I'd say its human nature. So once again, let's try and think about some dreams, Mr. Buddhist. Shall we? … At least to make sure you're doing it for the right reasons.
Eric laughed of the comment
- Hmmm. I'm definitely not a Buddhist... Ok, let's see.
“Keep touring with the band? Settle somewhere? Where? Go to college? Work with Tom?”
Eric really put some effort onto it, and Alice appreciated the time he put on trying to answer her curiosity.
- Well, I don't know. I think … just keep doing my work, maybe get better, you know. I...I'm not sure about settling down anywhere in the near future. Maybe I could go to college at some point, I guess... I don't know, it's like anything I think about doing... I'd have to start from zero, you know? I feel like I moved around too much: You get to meet a lot of people, but not actually to know them...Besides, I don't know, is a bit paradoxical, because of what I just said but … meeting so many people, and getting to know them... I sort of lost a bit of faith in people. People are usually so fucking full of shit... I feel like everything I have is my music, my work, and my band partners.
- Oh...I see...Well, are they cool at least?
- Yeah, they are. I like them, they are not full of shit, and they are very straight forward people. They don't try to be something they are not, they're always making fun of themselves, and they are honest about being almost like sex addicts and booze… enthusiasts. And my friend Mike...He's a very nice guy, you'd understand him better than you'd understand me: He is still always and persistently looking for love.
- I see... I love those kind of people...And...Hmm... And did that … bipolarity about life reached them too?
Eric gave a small grin.
- It's complicated. The whole story is complicated. But no, they are pretty much...doing very well about it at the moment. At least it seems that way, overall.
- Well, I have time. Apparently you too...
Eric was now smiling: It was easy to talk to her.
She smiled back, while raising her eyebrows.
- All righty then, but I'm gonna need another tea then, please.
- Yesss, sir – She smiled again – Just a minute.
When she sat back with his tea, he started to talk.
- … So, yeah... I was born in Florianopolis and I lived there until I was eleven. At some point, my family and I moved to Sao Paulo for three years, and when I was almost turning fifteen we went back to Florianopolis. A bit after I turned sixteen I moved to San Francisco, in the States,
to finish high school and to go to college, but it turns out two years later I had become a professional musician.
- ...Why so many changes?
- My dad's work... (Not entirely true)
- Hmm I see, so you just decided not to go to college? … How old are you by the way?
- Hmm... I never felt like going to college in the states to be honest. Luckily I had an option, right... - Alice nodded – And I'm twenty-two, almost twenty three by the way...
- And how old is the girl here from Paris?
- Twenty... – For the first time, Eric thought about how much he was hiding about himself, and how much he was hiding about Marie. After all, the Montini name would probably call even Alice's attention.
- ... Hmm...
- Yeah, so tell me a bit more of yourself...
- ... Hmm, I'm a pretty simple girl. I like camping, going to the beach, surfing, and doing yoga. Books, music, going for a hike, watching movies, dancing...Playing guitar around a campfire. I was a girl scout, so...yeah. I lived my whole life in Floripa, though.
- Right... And did the scout movement made you like these things or you already liked these things and then joined the movement?
- Hard to say. My mom always say I'm a baby from Woodstock anyways, so...Yeah...Probably the latter...
Eric smiled. Alice kept talking.
- And my parents are like... the chilliest people ever, so I sort of got raised this way – Pointed to herself
- I see. Freedom and whatnot?
- Sure. But not only that. All the fuss about society and freedom to come and go. And to be.
- That`s cool… What about your parents?
- Well, my parents are still living there right, in Floripa, really close to your place apparently, with my younger sister. It's a pretty nice place, sooo close to the beach, I love it. I have another aunt that lives in “Lagoa da Conceicao” (She said it with her Portuguese accent)... She has like three kids, and I'd always spend time with them and even sleep over, when I wanted to go to parties or something like that. It's like I have two homes, because I even had a tiny room with my stuff there, which is pretty cool. What else... My aunt here is married, but she doesn't have any kids, so she's always happy when anyone from Floripa comes to visit.
- European influence?
- Probably, yeah. What about your family?
- Well, I have a small family. This uncle and aunt of mine who lives in San Francisco and an aunt that lives in Moscow. She's cool, a Bolshoi ballerina, but I saw her like three times in my entire life.
- I see...
- My parents are living in Toulouse and I'm probably gonna visit them soon. I have a couple of younger siblings, a sister and a brother. Besides that, my uncle has a son that lives in Canada, and that's all the family I have.
- Cool, very international.
- Uhum
- Well, I speak for myself, but having family abroad sometimes is really a privilege. It opens you a lot of doors, don't you think?
- True, for sure...
Silence
- … Were you able to take a look at any of the books you bought?
- Yeah, I couldn't sleep last night so I tried to read a bit.
Alice analyzed him for a second before asking.
- ... Is it about that call? Is it really affecting you that bad?
- Hmm, no... I ...I always had problems sleeping.
- Wow... How come? How bad?
- Hmm... Sort of bad. There's some nights I can't sleep, almost at all. Several times I'm able to pass out for like five hours, maybe. I take sleeping pills for that though, that helps most of the nights... Also pretty rare, but then sometimes I sleep for like thirteen hours...
- Wow that must be fun. Can't a doctor help you?
- Well, I went to one already...A couple to be honest. He's the one that gave me the prescription for the sleeping pills, apparently they are like really strong, but he can't do much, he said it's probably related to my routine, nutrition, psychological factors, whatever... too many variables.... I can't treat them all while travelling. But think for the positive side, I get like three or four extra hours when it happens. - Eric tried to smile, but he knew that that wasn't funny.
- Uau... I sleep a lot, like an angel. I need at least like nine hours per day, less than that, I can't function properly...
- Good for you – He smiled, she then laughed at his facial expression.
- I know, right. ‘Good boy, champs' – And gave a thumbs up.
-... Just one second... - A customer got into the store
- No problem
She started talking to the customer, showed him the books he was looking for, told him the price while making a bit more of conversation and he finally bought the book.
- Girl, you must have a gift for that.
- No way, when I first started, I couldn't sell anything. Can you believe that? Seriously, it was really bad, the bookstore almost closed because of me – They laughed - it's just a matter of adaptation. I guess it can be harder to some people to sell, but other than that, it's not that hard. And for sure you can't force a person to buy something, right?
- Yeah I guess...
- So, hey, when was the last time you went back to Brazil again?
- ... Six years...Almost seven I guess... something like that. I don't even know...
- Gosh, don't you miss it?
- ...I don't have anything there to miss, I guess...
- I mean about the country itself.
- Hmm... I don't know. I've never been a beach guy, surfer, camper or whatever – She laughed at his mention – So yeah... I don't think so, no. It's a bit cliché this thing that you have to miss a place, or a country. I miss what I want to miss, and I just don't see any reasons to miss Brazil...Does that make sense to you?
- Yeah, I guess that makes sense.
- So would you like to have dinner again tonight?
- Hmm my aunt is waiting for me, she's making a dinner at her place for a few friends.
- Oh, ok – He would have to grab some food and spend the rest of the night alone. But she interrupted his train of thoughts.
- Naah, don't worry, I'll call her and tell you I'm bringing you. How does that sound to you?
Eric hesitated, he wasn't feeling like talking to anyone else. Besides, he was a bit fed up with family dinners.
- Come oon, people are nice, and they'll like you. It'll be fun. - She waited a second, but still no asnwer - …. Come on, she won't call you at this time – She smiled, jokingly – And even if she does, nothing will stop you from talking to her.
- It's not that...
- So let's go... For me?
She made a very sweet and persuasive face.
- Ahh... - Eric smiled – Ok...
- Awesome. Pretty awesome.
She went behind the counter to call her aunt and tell her about Eric. The call didn't last long and her aunt apparently didn't have anything at all against the idea. When she was done on the phone, she told Eric it was almost time to close the bookstore.
Half an hour later, they left the store and had to try to grab a taxi, because it was pouring rain.
While they were talking, laughing, waiting for a taxi to appear, Alice gently pushed Eric against the bookstore door, and kissed him.
It wasn’t a short kiss. And it was good, it was natural. It was intense and breathtaking, while they were slightly getting hit by the rain.
They got a cab, and even though they tried their best, they ended up making out in the cab too, with the taxi driver having to clear his throat a couple of times.
Alice put her head on Eric's shoulder and he kissed her. They were actually holding hands and there was an aura of heat around them. It was a bit weird that transition. Like a hit in the head. A cute and beautiful hit in the head.
- Thank you - And that's all he said about it, smiling, and gently kissing her.
- ...You know, I'd really like to throw your phone out of the window right now. But I really want you to work things out with her. - She smiled
He kissed her forehead again but didn’t say anything.
The driver was still looking, and he clearly raised his eyebrows about the last comment. Alice noticed that so she jokingly said to the driver:
- I'm his mistress, sir. He's going through a tough divorce...
The driver smiled back.
- Oh, poor guy, is she ripping your pants off?
Eric smiled, as if he was agreeing.
- It's ok… You would be surprised on how many actual mistresses and married people I have to drive around. I should put a camera on my taxi and blackmail people – They all laughed – I would have my own yacht, enjoying my own mistresses at the Caribbean, thanking god for creating the French people. Hun? - They laughed
-Yeah, that wouldn't be so bad
- Not bad, not bad at all... - Said the driver
Eric gave him a very generous tip, to what the driver said, smiling:
- Opa! I'll put that aside for my yacht, kind sir! Have a lovely evening!
When they got off the cab, they stayed outside Alice's place for a while. They held each other again and Eric was able to smell her perfume. He got stunned by it.
He caressed her face and put his hand on her neck, while they continued to kiss each other, talking and laughing.
At some point, they went upstairs.
To the Paris of our dreams Page 9