“Some.” Wylder nodded. “I remembered you had blond hair just like mine.”
“Well, I was never cool enough to pull off dreads, but you look amazing. Would you…” She took a step back, shoving the broken mug onto a side table. “Would you like to come inside?” She laughed nervously.
“Yes, thank you. Sorry, this is my friend Nicky.” Wylder grasped his hand as she followed her mother inside.
“Nice to meet you, Nicky.” Sadie smiled. “Let’s go sit out on the back porch. It’s nice out there. Can I get you some tea? Or water?” She led them through to the kitchen at the back of the Craftsman house. It was old, and the décor simple, but it was beautiful.
“Tea would be nice, thank you,” Nicky said, and Wylder nodded. He wasn’t a fan of hot tea, but he was here for moral support, so he’d drink whatever was offered.
“How is everyone?” Sadie asked, her hands shaking as she poured hot water over Earl Grey tea bags. “Your brother? Dad and stepmom are all okay, right?”
“Everyone’s good.” Wylder fumbled with the honey her mom offered.
“Good, good.” She nodded, passing Nicky his tea before she turned toward the screened-in porch. “Come have a seat and tell me all about yourself. How is school? Last your father told me, you were in a band with Becks. But that’s been a while.”
“Yeah, that was a couple of years ago.” Wylder sat on the wicker loveseat with her mom. Nicky made himself at home in the armchair right next to her. “Before Becks left for Nashville.”
“Right, right.” Sadie nodded.
Wylder fell silent for a moment, her fingers tapping furiously against her tea cup.
“Wylder was in an all-girls band for the last two years,” Nicky prompted, trying to keep them talking.
“Yeah, that was fun for a while. But I got into some trouble with the older girls, so Dad made me quit. I’m not playing much music these days.”
“I heard you sing with Becks at one of his recent concerts,” Sadie said.
“You were there?” Wylder’s eyes widened.
“No, darlin’, couldn’t afford the tickets, but I saw the video online. You have a beautiful voice. You kids got your music talent from me, but Lord knows, you and Becks have more talent in your little pinkie toes than I ever did. But I always loved to sing and play the piano.”
“I play drums mostly.” Wylder relaxed some, flashing a hint of a smile at Nicky.
Nicky cringed as his phone chirped in his pocket. “Sorry about that. Sadie, would you mind if I take a closer look at your garden?” Nicky gestured to the backyard. “You have such beautiful flowers. I’d love to see them and give you two some time to talk.”
“Of course, Nicky, thank you.” Sadie stood to open the screen door for him.
“I’ll be right here if you need me,” Nicky said.
“I’m good, thanks, Nicky.” Wylder looked relieved so he knew she’d be okay for a few minutes at least.
Nicky walked along the stone pathway across the backyard full of flowers in bloom. It was like a little oasis in the middle of the city, but the whole garden looked new. Like maybe Sadie had developed a passion for gardening recently, along with her sobriety.
With a sigh, Nicky sat down on a concrete bench, slipping his phone from his pocket. The text message he’d been expecting but didn’t want to see stared him in the face.
Becks: Are you okay?
He didn’t know how to answer that question nor any of the others that would surely follow if he replied. “Am I okay?” He had no idea. Nicky ignored the text, about to return his phone to his pocket when it chirped again.
“Damn it, Becks, I don’t want to talk,” he muttered at his phone. It was the same text but from his brother this time.
Avery: Are you okay?”
Nicky: Depends. Are you asking for Becks?
Avery: No. I’m your big brother, it’s my job to make sure you’re okay. And ouch, man. I’m not getting between you two, and if I’m helping anyone, it’s going to be you.”
Nicky: Thanks Ave. I’m fine.
Avery: You’re not going to bail on me are you?
Nicky: Bail?
Avery: You’re still coming to Nashville in August, right? I was looking forward to showing my little bro around the Vanderbilt campus.
Nicky: I’ll be there. I just don’t know if I can live across the hall from Becks. Not after all this drama. At least not right away.
Avery: I understand, little man. I just want you to know I’ve got your back. But if you want to live in the dorms first semester, I get it.
Nicky: It might be easier all around if I just move into the dorms permanently.
Avery: Easier for who?
Nicky: You and Nari need your space.
Avery: Dude, do you even know how often Nari and Becks aren’t here? I was looking forward to having a roommate when they travel. Someone not into the country music scene if you know what I mean.
Nicky: Their world is intense.
Avery: It gets easier.
Nicky: Let’s just see how things look before school starts.
Avery: Call me if you need me.
Nicky’s shoulders slumped. A few weeks ago, he had the next four years of his life planned, and he was excited about them. Excited about living in the heart of Nashville with his brother and two of his best friends. How had one fake kiss changed all of that?
Nicky heard laughter coming from the porch behind him. Over the last hour, he’d heard Sadie and Wylder run the gamut through tears and some anger too. Now, mother and daughter were laughing, a safe bet he could return to the conversation.
“Becks was such a precocious child. I really don’t know how he made it to adulthood in one piece.” Sadie chuckled.
“Well, some things never change,” Nicky said. “He’s still a precocious child.” Nicky closed the screen door behind him. His smile came easy at the thought of Becks as a little kid. Becks the adult was just not his favorite person at the moment.
“Oh, he can’t be that bad,” Sadie said, her eyes shining bright with happiness.
“No, Nicky’s right,” Wylder said. “Becks still needs regular adult supervision, but Sky is usually on Becks duty these days.”
“I’m glad to hear you two are getting to know your cousin. It makes me happy to know my sister and her daughter are looking out for you both.”
“You didn’t talk to Aunt Angela regularly?” Wylder frowned.
“No, darlin’, I burned a lot of bridges with my addiction. I love my sister and my niece, but I put them through hell.”
“Well, I’m here to talk about happier things.” Wylder’s smile lit her eyes in a way Nicky hadn’t seen in a long time, making him think maybe he hadn’t been there for her as much as he should.
“We’ve talked all about school and music and crushes,” Sadie said.
“Crushes?” Nicky darted a glance at Wylder. “What crushes? I don’t know anything about crushes. Who’re we talking about?”
Wylder hit him with the needlepoint pillow she’d clutched in her lap. “Nothing you need to know about.”
“Come on, Wylds. I’m your best friend. You gotta give me something.”
“These lips are sealed. But since we’re talking about crushes, how’s my brother today? I saw you angry texting out there.”
“I was texting my brother, thank you very much. You know I’m not talking to you-know-who.”
“Trouble in paradise?” Sadie asked. “From what I’ve seen online, you two are steaming up the camera lenses all over Nashville.”
Of course, she recognized Nicky because she was Beckett Anderson’s estranged mom. She probably knew every sordid detail of Becks’ life from the tabloids and gossip sites.
“Um… We just don’t see eye to eye on PDA issues.” Nicky’s cheeks warmed. He couldn’t tell anyone—not even Becks’ mom—that the relationship was fake.
“But he’s happy?” She looked expectantly at Nicky.
“Of course,” N
icky lied.
“He’s always been so angry with me. I’ve missed so much of your lives because of my addiction. Tell me about Becks, please?” She cast hopeful eyes at both of them.
“Well, he hasn’t changed much since infancy.” Wylder rolled her eyes. “He’s always been the protective older brother. When I was little, he never treated me like the pesky little sister I probably was. He always made time for me. He played with me when I was a kid, taught me to love music, and encouraged me to play drums to annoy Dad.” She laughed at the memory. “And when he was in high school and wanted to start a band with his friends, he didn’t think it was weird to have his fifteen-year-old little sister on drums when the rest of Anonymous were seniors.”
“That’s because he adores his little sister. He’ll tell anyone who will listen that you’re the best drummer since John Bonham, whoever that is.”
“Led Zeppelin, really? Oh my God, how are we friends?” Wylder dropped her head into her hands. “He’s only the greatest drummer of all time—and my brother is totally wrong by the way, I’m no Bonham.”
“I’m so glad you’ve had Becks looking out for you,” Sadie said.
“Sometimes, he’s like having another mom.” Wylder laughed. “I remember when I was little, like maybe eight or nine and I decided to walk to Defiance Falls all by myself. I wanted to see if there was a cave behind the falls like the rumors say.”
“Oh my, I hope someone stopped you. That waterfall is dangerous!” Sadie grasped Wylder’s hand.
“I left Becks a note saying I was going exploring, and if I didn’t come back I’d found a portal to a lost world and not to come looking for me.”
“Which, of course, Becks did exactly that, right?” Nicky laughed. “He couldn’t have been more than twelve himself.”
“That didn’t stop him from stealing Dad’s car,” Wylder continued. “He came flying across the park—completely ignoring the roads. He was out of the driver’s seat, clucking and squawking at me like a momma hen, before I could even get near the falls. He grabbed my hand and dragged me back to the car.” Wylder wiped her eyes, laughing at the memory.
“He shoved me into the back seat and wouldn’t even let me talk.” She rolled her eyes. “And then he couldn’t figure out how to back the car up in the mud, so we had to walk all the way into town to get Dad to come help. Becks was more mad at me than Dad was. He thought it was funny. Becks argued with him all afternoon, insisting I needed to be grounded for life.”
“You gotta love Becks.” Nicky shook his head, staring at a point over Sadie’s shoulder, lost in his thoughts. “He can be so ridiculous, funny as hell, and irritating all at the same time, but he’d protect his sister with his life and give you the shirt off his back and the last dollar in his pocket. And if he didn’t have anything to give you, he’d write you a song.”
“I’d give anything to see that side of him.” Sadie smiled. “I’ve only ever seen the angry Becks.”
“Angry Becks is a hard one to deal with.” Nicky’s hands fidgeted in his lap. “But he loves so fiercely, and I know he doesn’t forgive easily. That’s probably really hard for you, Sadie, but Becks is a good man. One of the best I’ve ever known. In many ways, he’s a lot like his dad, but they tend to butt heads sometimes. I can’t help but think he gets a great deal of himself from his mom. You should be proud of the man he’s become.”
“Oh, I am.” Sadie’s eyes filled with tears. “Even if he never forgives me or speaks to me again, I’m damn proud of my boy. And I’m so glad he has someone in his life who sees him clearly and loves him for exactly who he is. We should all be so lucky.”
Nicky forced a smile. Is Sadie right? Am I in love with Becks? He wasn’t ready to admit that to himself or anyone else. He’d only ever crushed on Becks, knowing it was safe because it would never be reciprocated. Nicky did not want to go down that road again with an unavailable guy. Not with someone who wasn’t secure in their sexuality. But a nagging thought echoed in his mind. Since when has Becks ever not been secure in anything he says or does?
Sadie turned to Wylder. “I’m so proud of my beautiful baby girl, too. You kids are the best things I’ve ever done with my life. I just hope it’s not too late for me and Becks to find some peace with each other.”
“He’ll come around, Mom,” Wylder said. “I’ll bring him with me next time I visit.”
“Nicky, you’ll come back too, I hope?” Sadie said. “It would be wonderful to see you and Becks together.”
“I’d love to.” Nicky said the words she wanted to hear. But he just couldn’t see a future where he got to be with Becks in the way he wanted. And he wasn’t prepared to pretend anymore. Pretending he loved Becks would only end in another broken heart, and Nicky didn’t think his heart could survive losing Becks like that.
10
Becks
Beckett Anderson wasn’t a beggar. He didn’t need to be. People came to him. They texted him without prompting, constantly worried they’d fall out of the rising star’s circle.
There were few people Becks trusted, but he’d started to realize even they didn’t know him. Not really.
Nari and Avery lounged on the white leather sofa in his living room, flipping through channels and bickering like the old married couple they were.
Leaning against the kitchen counter, Becks ignored them and stared at his phone. Texts popped up on his screen. Sky, Sofie, and plebes from the label. They all wanted something from him. Sofie fielded all requests from reporters as well as a lot of his personal business. Only a select few had this number.
One of them now being Nicky. All because of Becks’ stupid text.
Becks: Are you okay?
What kind of question was that? Of course, he wasn’t okay. He’d been used to make the country world happy, to give them a love story that didn’t exist.
But hadn’t Becks been used as well? It wasn’t like he’d had much choice. Maybe if he’d known the whole scenario would rip Nicky from his life, he would have refused no matter the consequences.
“None of this matters.” He tore the phone from the counter and threw it across the room. It hit the wall and landed on the floor with a definitive thud. “Damn iPhone. Can’t even give me the satisfaction of breaking something.”
Avery got off the couch and walked over to the phone. He turned it over when he picked it up. “If it makes you feel better, the screen is cracked.” He held it up as proof.
Becks nodded. “It does. It really does.” He rested his elbows on the counter and hunched over, burying his face in his hands.
Nari and Avery were silent for a long moment before a hand landed on Becks’ shoulder. “Dude.” Avery’s grip tightened. “You okay?”
A harsh laugh escaped Becks’ throat. That was the same question Nicky hadn’t responded to. Before he could answer, there was a pounding on his front door.
Nari jumped up to answer it, letting out a squeal as she did. “Wylder!” She threw her arms around the younger girl.
Great. Just what Becks needed. His sister was here to meddle as she was so fond of doing. Wylder didn’t smile as she scanned the room. Her eyes locked on Becks.
Pushing away from the counter, he faced her. “Hey, Wylds.” He tried to wipe all strain from his face, becoming the happy Becks she’d known all her life. She crossed the room and surprised him by pulling him into a hug.
“Hey.” He breathed into her hair. “I missed you too.” Pushing her back to arm’s length, he took in the dark circles under her eyes and the crease between her brows. “What are you doing in Nashville? Did something happen? Are Mom and Dad okay?”
At the mention of their dad and stepmom, she stepped away from him, pulling at the ends of her dreads. “Have you heard from Mom recently?”
“Yeah, she calls me every week.”
Wylder shifted her eyes away. “Not Mom. Mom.”
It hit him. She didn’t mean the stepmom who raised them but the woman who’d given birth to them before choosing
drugs over her own children.
“That’s our cue to leave.” Nari pulled Avery toward the door. “Becks, don’t forget, the anti-hate rally tonight. Soundcheck is at three, but we can do that without you. Spend time with Wylder. Just get there by six.” She turned to Wylder. “It’s good to see you.”
Wylder offered her a strained smile. “I’ll make sure he’s there.”
“I don’t need a keeper,” Becks grumbled.
Both women shot him a look he knew only too well. The “shut up, Becks” look.
“Avery and I will take the car the label sends then.” She fixed Becks with a stare. “Please, don’t be late. This rally is kind of a big deal.”
Avery only sent him a sympathetic smile as Nari led him out.
“You want something to drink?” Becks tried to busy himself in the kitchen to avoid having to answer Wylder’s question. “Or something to eat? I could make us lunch.”
Wylder set her purse on the counter. “If you make us lunch, you’ll be late to your rally because we’ll both be dead.”
“Hardy, har, har.” He slid an arm around her neck. “I have missed you.”
She peered up at him with wide eyes he knew weren’t so innocent. His sister had a knack for trouble. It was why he’d had to agree to be the poster boy for Defiance Academy just to get her in after she failed her junior year at Twin Rivers and ended up getting expelled.
“Now, I know you didn’t come just to see my beautiful face. You asked about our mother.” He refused to call the woman Mom.
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