What about her job? She had a vague notion that there was a weird moral clause in her contract with the strict religious school. She tugged on her ear. They could fire her right when she needed her paycheck and insurance the most.
They wouldn’t, would they? The principal and the board of trustees loved her. She had four years of glowing annual reviews. The air in her lungs tightened again. Amelia Tannehof, the chair of the board, was prim and proper, and then of course, there was Caitlynne Barrett, the vice-chair.
If her stepmother was on a rampage, heaven only knew how she’d react. She might lead the charge to get her canned. Sam bit her lip until pain forced her to relent.
And then there was Ethan. Her brain swirled in a stew of thoughts. This wasn’t in his schedule or playbook either. He’d come to Barrett Ridge to ditch big city stresses. And now he’d knocked up the local girl. His best friend’s sister. That didn’t sound good.
Sam rose and tucked the pregnancy tests in the bottom vanity drawer. She glanced around, but there was no sign of Nana. The TV hummed downstairs while Nana banged around in the kitchen. She tiptoed to her bedroom and pulled the door shut with the faintest of clicks.
She grabbed the creamy, fuzzy afghan from the foot of the bed and curled into the chair by the window. The gauzy sheer curtains filtered the late afternoon sun, and Sam turned her face toward it as if she could absorb the feeble warmth of the winter light.
Ethan needed to know. Her mind blanked. No fancy, smooth way of telling him, no casual “Mat passed his test with an A today, and by the way, you’re going to be a dad again in nine months.”
She burrowed deeper into the soft throw blanket. Did she have to tell him? Maybe she could play it off. For a while. Looser sweaters. Obviously, eat extra cupcakes. Move to Tahiti before June so he’d never guess that she was preggers.
Yeah. That was a brilliant plan.
Crap. What would her father say? One more way that she was nothing like her successful and practical siblings. Leave it to Samantha to let her life run out of control. Austin with his brilliant career as a CFO. Jami killing it in real estate and about to marry a fabulous entrepreneur. Anna had been divorced, but Teddy had forgiven her with the addition of her charming husband, Rob, to the family. Jo and Dillon were tearing it up. And even her baby brother, Kyle, was earning straight As in his first year of engineering studies. He’d make bank upon graduation and land a glorious and prestigious job.
She’d be the only one with a bland career as an English teacher to pimply teens, an unplanned pregnancy, and no wedding ring.
Lots of women had babies without a baby-daddy in the house. She’d just be one more, right? It was doable. It was merely a matter of logistics. It wasn’t like she was going to be a social outcast or anything.
Ethan might want to be involved. He was practically part of the family. Pipo Cordero cared about her. After the shock, he’d probably be excited. Grandkids were a luxury.
But Ethan. Ethan was her wild card.
Wow. This was almost how her silly daydreams of Ethan had gone during her senior year. She’d imagined him falling head over heels in love with her. Conveniently dumping his wife, in an oh-so-caring way, and sweeping her off her feet. Riding off into the sunset and having those two or three bundles of joy. He’d beam at her over their morning croissants as Junior nibbled on his Cheerios. Ethan would take her hand, trail kisses up her arm, and his tongue would glide across the column of her neck. Sam quivered.
But they weren’t in love. Lust, yes. Love, not likely. Sam fussed with the afghan and tugged it over her shoulders against the window draft. She didn’t have a crush on Ethan. That was ridiculous.
A baby game changer. Sam ran her hand over her belly and abdomen. Still flat and smooth, except for that little curve from Nana’s pumpkin cheesecake last night.
But what would Ethan think? There was no getting around it. He’d have to be told. She couldn’t slink around and pray that he remained oblivious to her expanding waistline. This wasn’t a secret that she could keep. That wasn’t the type of person she was. She was honest as the day was long.
Telling him would change everything. He wanted nothing to do with her, but that choice had disappeared. He didn’t care about her in any other way than as a sister.
A tear threatened, but she blinked it back. She’d have floods of tears later, but at the moment, she needed a clear head.
A plan. She desperately desired a vision. Would they co-parent from the two houses? Would he dash over to change a diaper if she was grading papers?
At least her savings account was flush from all the money she’d saved since moving in with Nana. She groaned. She was stuck here. She’d be crazy to buy that dreamy little cottage. She’d have to call Jami and cancel the deal and lose her escrow money. Maybe Jami could save it, somehow. Her nest egg was now earmarked for baby.
Ethan would help, she supposed. He was a stand-up guy, but people did weird, unpredictable things when backed up against a wall. This was certainly an epic event.
Sam hurled the afghan on to the bed, and she snatched her phone. With a blur of typing, she dashed off a message to Ethan. Before she could change her mind, she hit send.
Something’s come up. We need to talk.
She shut her eyes and counted to ten. Fitful breaths evened out. Now to wait.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
WITH A NUDGE from his foot, Ethan closed his office door against the hum of patients and staff voices reverberating in the hallway. He’d seen his last patient of the day, and his hospital rounds were completed.
Ethan ran fingers through his hair and slid into his desk chair. He pivoted to stare out the window as a gust of wind bent a pair of trees to the side. Ethan scanned the western sky where billowing slate-gray clouds roiled over the hills. There was a storm coming.
He checked his watch and then locked up his desk. Time was ticking down to his meeting with Sam. He supposed it was about Mateo, but he couldn’t imagine why they wouldn’t meet at the school again.
Inexplicably, Sam had picked the park a few blocks from home. Ethan shrugged. Based on the fast-moving clouds, he’d predict they were going to get wet.
Less than a half hour later, Ethan pulled into the parking lot and spotted Sam sitting on the edge of a lone bench next to the slides and play structures. Her bag was held primly in her lap, and an umbrella leaned against her leg.
The first raindrops plinked against his windshield, and Sam eased off the bench and approached his vehicle. He couldn’t read her expression, but there wasn’t a smile in sight.
He stepped out and met her by the grill of his car. “It looks like the weather’s about to hit.” Ethan pointed at the sky. “Do you want to walk or sit in the car?”
Sam studied her the tips of her black boots and the growing number of dark rain splots on the sidewalk. She met his gaze. “The car will be fine.”
As they settled back into the car seats, Ethan asked about Nana and Sam inquired about his new practice. Silence hung between them. A gust of wind shook the car, and a dense rain burst hit.
“It’s a good thing we’re inside.”
Sam peered at him as if he were speaking a foreign language. A chill shot up his spine and the hair on the back of his neck bristled. This wasn’t going to end well.
“I’m pregnant.” Sam’s lips pinched together as she twisted in her seat to face him.
“You’re what?” His brain froze, and the word pregnant reverberated between his ears.
“Exactly.”
“We used a condom. Shit. You’re on contraceptives, right?” Shit. Shit. Shit.
“I was.” Sam coughed and touched her arm where the five now useless rods sat. “My doctor is out on extended leave, and I—um, I didn’t think about these expiring.”
Ethan closed his eyes. Deja vu. All over again. How had he knocked up two women? He was a medical professional. Fuck. He should have his license revoked for sheer stupidity. Dammit. Those condoms had been in his wallet f
or two or three years. He’d never changed them out for newer ones. Wow. It took two to tango.
“Are you sure? Have you seen a doctor?”
“She won’t be back until next week. I did two tests. The double line popped up instantly.”
“How far along are you?” He prayed that he wasn’t the father.
He studied the flush on Sam’s cheeks, and her hands clenched in her lap. Her long wheaten hair had whispered like silk across his chest when they’d made love. It had cascaded like a waterfall of molten gold across her shoulders and over her breasts and only allowed him teasing glimpses of her amber aureoles and nipples. Breath caught in his throat.
“I’m two weeks late. I think that’s six weeks pregnant. Right?”
“Yeah.” This was real. Again. Mateo was getting a sibling, whatever his plans might have been. He should have stayed in Los Angeles. Who would have thought the big city was safer than small town Barrett Ridge? Plan. A strategy. He needed something. His mind was a big, bad, blank void.
“What are we going to do?”
“I have no idea.” Jesus. He had nothing. Zip. Bupkus. Shit. It hadn’t been his brain getting him into this. “This shouldn’t have happened.”
Sam’s face closed off. “What do you think we should do?”
Should? He should have his head examined. Should! He should have his zipper superglued. Ethan slammed his fist against his thigh. The pain focused his attention. “Why does everyone expect me to have all the answers?” His voice was cold, detached but fury oozed between each clipped word. “I’m not some miracle worker. Maybe there aren’t any answers. Just a ton of crappy alternatives.”
“Fabulous attitude.” Sam leaned her head against the window. “I don’t expect you to have all the answers. I’m only asking for input. Not a save the world kind of solution.”
Ethan cursed under his breath. Anger and fear battled. His knuckles whitened. Would the steering wheel snap, he wondered? His oh-so-carefully constructed uber-calm doctor persona dissolved like a fog against a hurricane wind. “Just fuck.”
“Calm your shit down.” Sam stared out the front window, and her voice held a tired anger. “I’m the one who’s going to carry this baby. I’m the one getting the stretch marks and probably throwing up for the next umpteen months. I’m the one who’s going to have to figure out daycare, feeding schedules, and how to be a single mom.”
“Single mom. I don’t think so.” Marriage. They’d need to get married. Just like with Felicia. “Everyone will expect us to get married.”
“I don’t expect it.”
“Bullshit. I know how this works. I’ve done it before. Did I ever tell you how I got married to Felicia?”
“No.” Her voice was small, and she shrank back against the car seat.
“I’m beginning to think I must have a bull’s-eye on my back. Insta-baby-daddy meal ticket.”
“You’re an asshole.”
“No. Experienced. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“My first wife got pregnant before we married. Hell, we were juniors in college. We were dating, but nothing too serious. Boom. She got pregnant with Mateo.” Ethan curled his fingers around the steering wheel and focused on the curves and twists of the emblem in the center. That was his big mystery. Had Felicia intended to get pregnant? “With her big Catholic family, she insisted that our only option was marriage. Premed and a family. Congratulations.”
Felicia had been his greatest failure in life. Bad judgment galore. Futile attempts to make her happy. Resentful hiding from her, and the tornado of her reckless behavior. But then there was Mateo. He never regretted the birth of his son.
He studied Sam’s profile. Felicia had been dark with a long, thin nose and luscious, pouty lips. Sam was one-eighty different. Delicate, fair skin. Golden hair with hints of unruly curls. Her nose was dainty with a pert little snub at the tip. Almost more pixie than grown woman.
Her tone was feisty, combative, but her tilt of her head told a different story. She was uncertain. Vulnerable.
She was the girl with the Band-Aid on her skinned knee, asking him to rescue her treed kitten. She was the teen who looked at him with stars in her eyes when he’d decked those idiots. He missed that starry-eyed woman.
He put his hand on her arm. She turned, but her expression was still closed off.
“I’m not pushing you into anything.” Sam swallowed a sudden sob. “I’m sitting here clueless and shocked, but this is our reality.”
Yes, the real world. He wasn’t perfect. Funny, he’d kind of put Sam on a pedestal. She was happy-go-lucky, cheerful, funny. His best friend’s little sister. She should have been untouchable. But no. He’d slept with her. Had crazy, wild sex. Now she was pregnant. Had he effed up perfection? Rubbed off on her?
Or was he blind? Was she no different than Felicia and her manipulative ways?
“I have to ask. Did you let this happen? On purpose.”
Sam sucked in a sharp breath. “Screw you. I’m sorry about your past, but I’m not some chick looking for a free ride. Or trying to trick you into a wedding ring.”
“The only honorable thing to do is get married.”
“Not a chance. You made it crystal clear that you have no interest in being with me or having any sort of relationship beyond next-door neighbors.”
“That was then.”
“No. That’s reality. I can’t do a marriage of convenience. They never work.”
“What else are we supposed to do? If it’s my child, I have a say-so in raising him. Or her. I don’t want to be an every other weekend dad. I tried that once. It was a disaster.”
“I have no idea. I’m still having problems imagining that my whole world is turning upside down. I put an offer on a new house last week. Now I don’t know which end is up.”
“You’re moving? What about Nana?”
“She’s going to be fine. You said so yourself. Don’t make me feel guilty for living my life.”
“You can’t just make decisions for yourself. You've got to consider the baby. I’m rather involved in this, too.”
“Don’t even lecture me.” Sam barked out a laugh. “There’s about three million decisions up in the air at this instant. And you haven’t done much to make any of it easier.”
“This is the hardest damn thing you’ll ever do. Motherhood is no cakewalk.”
“Thanks for the hot tip, Oprah. I can’t exactly undo what we’ve already done. We made a baby.” Sam met his gaze. “You don’t want me to end this pregnancy, do you?”
“I’m not asking you to.” Fury erupted in his gut.
“Good. I’m not going to.” Her hands clenched. “I can’t end this baby’s life merely because we weren’t careful enough. I won’t let you ask it of me.”
“I wouldn’t.” Ethan kept his voice controlled, even.
“You were thinking it.”
“You don’t know what the hell I’m thinking right now.”
Rain beat down on the roof, and water sheeted down the fogged windows.
“Tell me then.”
“I’m thinking that I’m the biggest idiot on the planet,” Ethan said through gritted teeth. “I let two women get knocked up because I couldn’t keep my pecker in my pants for two seconds.”
“Don’t worry. I have no plans to upset your precious life. I need nothing from you. I was trying to be responsible in letting you know you have a child coming into the world. That’s all.”
Sam slammed the latch on the door and in one fluid motion, grabbed her bag and leaped out of the car. She banged the door shut and marched away. The rain streaming down, unrelenting.
Ethan pounded his fist against the steering wheel. How could any of this happen all over again?
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
AS SAM SLAMMED out of the car, tightness gripped her chest. Air refused to filter through her lungs. She tramped through the sodden air. She sloshed through a pud
dle, soaking her feet. The sound of a car starting filled her ears.
She would not look. She didn’t want any more of Ethan Cordero. She needed to get away from him, his expectations, his shitty past. His fury and frustration. She trudged along the sidewalk.
“Get in.”
“No. I’ll walk.”
“It’s cold out, and you’ll be soaked to the bone.”
“I have an umbrella.” Trembling, she fumbled with the snap. It wobbled and unfolded. “Now go away.”
“Running from this isn’t going to solve anything.”
“Oh, suddenly you have answers?”
“No. But walking home in the rain isn’t it.”
“Go away.”
His car kept pace with her, but the curve ahead in the path would lead her away from the road, down by the river walkway.
“Don’t be foolish. You’ll get soaked to the bone and catch pneumonia.”
Sam stopped. “I’m not running away. I’m not jumping in the creek to drown myself. I want space without you in it.” She bit back tears and whirled around.
She set off, but her boots were filled with lead weights. Tiny pellets of rain plinked against the umbrella and the rumbling crash of the approaching furious creek drowned out all other noises.
She had no idea if Ethan was still watching or if he’d left. She couldn’t look back. She lengthened her stride, despite her unwilling muscles. She slipped around a bend in the path. She peeked back as she was sure that she was hidden from view.
A small cry escaped from between her lips, and she ran. She pumped her legs. Faster and faster. Her breath ragged. She pushed on.
She flew along the wooded path behind the last row of houses and sought refuge on the last bench by the creek. Desperate gulps of air searing her lungs. Mercifully, not a soul disturbed the crashing of water over rocks.
She blinked at the stinging wetness in her eyes and held her cold hands to her flaming cheeks. Dampness leaked through her coat to her rear and legs. She didn’t care.
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