“Leave the lass be, son,” Seamus said. “She needs time with a woman like your mum. I fear she’s had too little time bein’ coddled.”
Ardan grabbed his cup of tea and sat beside his father. “The lads have been outside a long time,” he murmured to his father. At his father’s tilt of his head, Ardan rose. “I’ll check on things.”
“Aye, an’ I’ll keep an eye on the café,” Seamus said, rising and entering the café with a booming voice and a tale at the ready.
Ardan stood on the back steps, watching as his brothers talked with Buford. Although Buford didn’t look as though he’d just had a run-in with three O’Rourkes, he clutched his side and breathed carefully, as though his ribs were bruised. Ardan winced and hoped his brothers hadn’t broken a rib. For, if they had, he knew the O’Rourkes would have to start working regularly at the café. He shrugged. He wouldn’t mind having an excuse to be at the café daily.
“Buford,” Ardan called out, as he descended the steps. He smiled as the man cowered away a few steps. “Ah, so you finally have sense. You understand better than to harm Deirdre again.”
Buford spat on the ground and glared at Ardan. “She has you under her spell. You think she’s telling you the truth about who she is, but she ain’t. No woman who can cook and work like she does just waltzes into a town without calamity stalking her.”
Ardan stood with his legs spread wide and his gaze filled with amusement, as he stared at Buford. “Perhaps that’s your tale of woe, Buford, but it isn’t mine. An’ I doubt ’tis Deirdre’s.”
“You believe you’re unlike every man taken in by a pretty face and a smile,” Buford said with a shake of his head. “You’ll learn your folly soon enough, boy.” He turned on his heel as though to walk away.
Ardan grabbed his arm. “I want to make sure you understand Deirdre is to be treated with respect. Always.” He waited for Buford to nod before he released his arm. When Buford stormed away, holding his right side, leaving the café untended, Ardan looked at his brothers. “I’ve brought more chaos to the family.”
“Nay,” Declan said. “We haven’t had enough to do at the warehouse. ’Twill be fun to chat with the men as they eat an’ to hear their stories.” He slung an arm over Ardan’s shoulder and gave him a squeeze before dropping his arm. “Does the lass understand how much you care for her?”
“I don’t know, Dec.” He stared at his brother with unguarded fear in his gaze. “I never thought to feel this way.”
Declan smiled and gave him a small nudge with his shoulder. “’Tis about time, Ardan. You deserve to be happy.”
Ardan stared at him in wonder. “How can you have such faith it will not end in a tragedy?”
Declan shrugged. “Life is filled with risk, Ardan. And all your attempts to protect yourself will only lead to loneliness.” He pointed in the direction of Kevin and Aileen’s small cabin. “I’ve come to realize I want something like they share. Just having a woman to cook, clean, and warm my bed would never be enough.” He paused. “Not after seein’ Mum and Da together again.”
Ardan nodded. “No, ’twould never be enough.” He slapped his brother on his shoulder and walked beside him into the café to rejoin his family and to ensure Deirdre was well.
Aileen poked her head into Deirdre’s room and smiled to find her resting on her bed, reading a book. “It’s good to see you have sense. I fear an O’Rourke sibling would be up and about, harming their ankle, no matter how much it hurt.”
Deirdre set aside her book and smiled at Aileen. “No. It’s too painful to do too much today. I hope it improves so I can do more tomorrow.” She motioned for Aileen to join her in her bedroom and smiled when Aileen sat on the chair near her bed. “I have never thanked you for your hard work cleaning my home when I first arrived.”
Aileen waved away the thanks. “It’s the least we could do. And Mary wanted to ensure you felt welcome.” She shrugged. “Besides, a man like Buford would never have thought such a task important.”
Deirdre rolled her eyes. “He didn’t believe a clean kitchen was essential for the success of his enterprise. Why would he consider the cleanliness of my home?” She shared a sardonic smile with Aileen. “I’m sorry if I’m keeping you away from the women of your family.”
Aileen shook her head. “Not at all. I’m busy with my own endeavors.” At Deirdre’s curious expression, she flushed. “I’m married to Kevin, and we have a small home.”
Deirdre squirmed around on the bed, until she’d settled on her side and her ankle was comfortable. “I imagine that takes some time.”
Aileen laughed. “It takes no time at all! It’s a tiny home, and we rarely even eat there. We always eat at the O’Rourkes, and, as you can imagine, Mary and Maggie always cook. I’m afraid I’m becoming spoiled.” She ducked her head, as though ashamed.
Deirdre looked at her with confusion, before snorting with incredulity. “Your aunt is Mrs. Davies, isn’t she?” At Aileen’s nod, Deirdre sighed. “I imagine she’s filled your head with such nonsense. You aren’t spoiled because someone else delights in doing a task you find onerous. I’m certain you do other things that help the family.”
Aileen flushed. “My aunt believes I’m a scandalous woman and despairs of me. Although I try to avoid her whenever possible.” She shrugged. “My aunt is not charitable.”
Deirdre nodded. “I fear I’ve had a few unpleasant conversations with her, and I’ve no desire to further my acquaintance with her.” She paused before asking in a hesitant voice, “Why would she believe you scandalous? Marrying Kevin O’Rourke would not make you so.”
“Well, my aunt wanted me to marry Declan, not Kevin, and was scandalized when Mary spoke out against my marriage to Declan at our wedding ceremony. The priest was most entertained. Thankfully Kevin and I wed soon afterward.” Her blush deepened to a dark crimson. “But my aunt’s most despairing of the fact I have my own work.” She smiled with pride. “Kevin rejoices in it, and I know the income will help us during the slow winter months.” She paused. “But there are those in town who are uncharitable.”
“I don’t understand,” Deirdre murmured.
“I’m a seamstress. And I don’t discriminate against my clients.” At Deirdre’s persistent frown of confusion, Aileen said, “I work mainly for the Madam at the Bordello. Few other female clients need my talents.”
“Oh my,” Deirdre breathed, her cognac-colored eyes widened with shock and delight. “How marvelous!” She giggled. “I imagine your aunt is furious at you.”
Aileen chuckled and nodded, her smile one of satisfaction. “Yes. Although I’m not working with Madam Nora to spite my aunt. I genuinely enjoy the work, and Madam Nora is a nice woman.” She shivered. “Although I give thanks every time I leave there that I have a home to return to. That Kevin is waiting for me.”
Deirdre leaned forward and gripped her hand. “Are you telling me that you’ve been inside the Bordello?”
Aileen’s smile widened at Deirdre’s fascination. “Yes, I have a tiny workshop there, where I mend the girl’s dresses or make them new ones. You’d be surprised how often their dresses need mending.” Her eyes widened at the comment, before she and Deirdre erupted in gales of laughter.
“Oh, I can’t imagine,” Deirdre, whispered. “And the O’Rourkes don’t mind you working there?”
Aileen shrugged. “They are practical. They know I am devoted to and love Kevin and that the extra money will only help us. Seamus knows lean years will come, and he wants us to be prepared for them. He’s terrified of suffering what they did in Ireland.”
Deirdre shivered and nodded. “Which is understandable.”
Aileen’s smile was filled with mischievousness as she met Deirdre’s gaze. “Besides, Seamus is good friends with Madam Nora and knows her to be a kind woman. He used to spend many evenings with her before Mary returned.” She laughed as Deirdre gaped at her. “As a friend, never as a customer. Kevin told me that his da needed someone to turn to. Someone to speak w
ith, when he felt the loneliness overwhelming him.”
Deirdre sighed and curled her arms up under her head. “Mary knows of such a friendship and accepts it?”
Aileen shrugged. “You’d have to speak with her, but she is always friendly toward Nora when she sees her. And Mary has never spoken a word against me working there. She understands my need to have something other than my marriage and Kevin’s family.”
A comfortable silence filled the room, as both women were lost in thought. Finally Deirdre murmured, “They seem a remarkable family.”
Grinning at her, Aileen said, “Yes, they are. And I’m fortunate enough to call them mine.”
Ardan slipped into her room to find the lamp still shining on her bureau. It cast a soft glow over her beautiful features and made her hair shine more red than gold. “What’s put a frown on your face, lass?” he asked, as he kicked off his boots and undid his coat and waistcoat. With a sigh, he climbed onto the bed and pulled her into his arms. “Ah, heaven,” he whispered, as he breathed in her subtle scent of lilacs.
“When are you leaving?” she asked, the tension in her body slowly easing as he cocooned her with his warmth.
“Where would I be goin’, lass?” he asked with a chuckle. He smiled as his warm breath on her nape evoked a shiver.
“To Saint Louis. With Declan.” Her hand rubbed over his arm wrapped around her waist, evoking a small shudder.
“Would you miss me, were I to leave?”
“You know I would,” she said with a sigh, as she moved around so she could face him. “Are you leaving? Am I to be separated from you until next spring?”
He studied her earnest gaze, filled with longing and trepidation, her worry easing part of his fear that his feelings were one-sided. Ever-so-slowly, he raised a hand to trace his fingers through the baby soft hair at her brow, before leaning forward to kiss one cheek and then the other. He smiled as he breathed, “No, love. I’ve no plans to travel with Dec, although I do worry about what mischief he’ll get into while he’s in Saint Louis.” He kissed his way to the sensitive skin behind her ear, earning a startled gasp as her hands rose to grip his shoulders. “Declan has too much curiosity an’ not enough common sense at times.”
She arched into his touch. “Common sense can be overrated.”
He chuckled as he nibbled at her earlobe. “I agree.”
Pulling at his hair, she ran her fingers through his beard, her soft palm and thumb caressing his lips. Her eyes glowed with passion and joy at the ardor in his gaze. “My … Ardan,” she whispered, leaning forward to kiss him.
He groaned, tugging her to him so she lay atop him. He deepened the kiss, his arms banded around her, as they shared their passion for each other. Soon he eased her to his side again, his hands caressing her head, shoulders, and arms. “Shh, love,” he murmured. “You know I desire you, but we have no need to rush anything. We have plenty of time.”
She reached for him, wrapping his arm securely around her. “Time has always been the one thing I’ve never had enough of with those I … care about,” she said, as she caught her breath.
“I’m not going anywhere, Deirdre. As I hope you’ve surmised, I’ve no desire to leave right now.”
“Right now or ever?” she asked.
He shook his head, his gaze filled with longing and a subtle chastisement. “Don’t tease me with what you aren’t willin’ to give. ’Tisn’t fair.” He saw her face fill with regret, and he stroked a hand down her back. After taking a few deep breaths, he murmured, “Tell me, love. Is this what you imagined when you thought to answer the advertisement my da posted?”
She gave a grunt of laughter and shook her head. “Of course not. I had hoped, by answering the advertisement, I’d meet a pleasant-enough man who never stirred any emotions.” She paused, flushing. “I had hoped to never … care about anyone ever again.”
He rolled so they lay side by side, facing each other. “Deirdre,” he breathed. “’Tisn’t a way to live.” He flushed. “You should never live a life devoid of love.”
She stroked his face. “Nor should you, Ardan.”
He nodded and pulled her close. “Let me hold you, a stoirín.”
The following morning, Ardan sat on his parents’ stoop, enjoying the shade and the cooler temperatures before the July heat arrived after midday. He would have preferred to sit on Deirdre’s steps and listen to her sing as she cooked, but he feared his presence at the café was becoming widely remarked upon. His mum and Maggie had just walked over to the café to join her in the kitchen, and he knew they would enjoy their gossip session without him listening in on the stoop.
With a sigh, he admitted to himself that Deirdre was becoming an integral part of his life, and he fought panic at having developed such strong feelings for her so quickly. He rubbed at his head in frustration at the thought of ever losing her.
Glancing in the direction of the café, he frowned as he saw Niamh approaching. “Niamh,” he said, his voice cool, although welcoming.
“Ardan,” she said. She held Maura on her hip. “Da will watch Maura this mornin’, while I help in the café.” She shifted a squirming Maura to her other hip.
“Come here, darlin’,” Ardan said, rising and holding out his hands to his niece. His gaze held a silent challenge for his sister, as though daring her to defy him from offering comfort to his niece. After a long moment, Niamh eased Maura into Ardan’s arms. He tickled his niece’s belly, earning a giggle and a delighted squeal. “There’s my precious girl,” he crooned. Smiling, he looked at Niamh and frowned to see her watching him with unveiled disdain. “You can’t possibly still be upset with me, Niamh.”
She shook her head. “You’ll never understand what it’s like.”
With a frown, he kissed Maura’s head and stared at his sister with a perplexed expression. “To marry a man such as your husband?” At her pained expression and quickly averted gaze, he murmured, “I pray every day I make a better choice than you did, Niamh.”
She stared at him with disillusionment. “No matter what, it’s always my fault because I chose him. Everythin’ that happens, I deserve.” She closed her eyes, as she wrapped her arms around her waist and turned away from her brother’s too-perceptive gaze. “Aye, I suppose ’tis only fair. I was impetuous and foolish. One must always pay for one’s mistakes.”
For long moments, the only sounds were the distant calls of men, the clucking of the chickens, and the persistent chirp of a robin. She took a deep breath and turned back to face her brother, her expression carefully blank.
“Niamh?” he asked. “What are you payin’ for?” He reached forward and gripped her hand. “You know we’ll always support you. You and Maura. No matter what.”
She nodded, fighting tears. “Aye, but some battles can’t be fought for you.” She forced a smile as she saw her daughter snuggled on her brother’s shoulder. “Will you pass her over to Da? She has a change of clothes and nappies in my old room here.”
“Aye,” Ardan said. He watched as she walked away in the direction of the café, frustration roiling through him that his relationship with his sister remained fragile. When Maura patted him on his cheeks, he chuckled. “Aye, little one. ’Tis too beautiful a day for worries. Come. Let’s find your granddad, for I know he has all kinds of stories for you.” He turned, walking up the steps to enter the house to find Seamus.
A few evenings later, Ardan sat alone in the café’s kitchen, long after the café had closed, sipping at a cup of black tea. He grimaced at the bitter taste and fought the urge to add milk and sugar. He eyed the sugar bowl and gave in to his desire to taste tea the way he loved it. After adding a healthy spoonful of sugar and a dollop of milk, he stirred it with a spoon, before taking a sip with a satisfied sigh. “Heaven,” he breathed.
After emigrating from Ireland—and even before, due to the potato famine—he had learned to do without so much of what brought him pleasure. A full stomach. Milk and sugar in his tea. His pillow. Anything so that h
is siblings would not know more discomfort than they already did. However, now that they were successful, he realized he could indulge a few of his desires.
“Never heard a man so enthralled over a cup of tea before,” Cormac Ahern said with a wry grin, as he stared at Ardan from the back door of the café. Broad shouldered and as tall as Ardan, Cormac rivaled Declan with his wild appearance. His long brown hair fell in waves past his shoulders, and his sky-blue eyes sparkled with mischief.
“First proper cup of tea I’ve had since I was a boy,” Ardan murmured. “Would you like one?”
Cormac chuffed out a soft laugh. “Not unless you have a dram of whiskey to add to it.” At Ardan’s shake of his head, Cormac sighed and accepted the cup of tea with only sugar. “Your da said I’d find you here.”
Ardan nodded, his alert gaze wholly focused on Cormac. Although he was loyal to the O’Rourkes, Ardan always felt a sense of reserve emanating from the man. As though he were waiting to see how things shook out. “What’s the matter, Cormac?”
“Could be nothin’.” He blew on the warm tea. “Or it could be everythin’.” After a long moment, he said, “I met an interesting man when I was at Cow Island. He’s waiting his turn to get a stage here, but I suspect he’ll be here in a day or two. Perhaps tomorrow.” Cormac rubbed at his thigh. “Ran my oxen hard to get here before he did.”
Ardan shook his head in confusion. “Why?” He took a sip of tea, fighting a deep sense of unease.
Swiping at his face streaked with dirt, Cormac had apparently searched for Ardan before seeking out a bath, after his latest trip to the improvised port downriver. His eyes flashed a warning as he said, “Man claims that he’s Silas Fiske and that he’s been wronged. That his sister-in-law, a Deirdre Fiske, stole his property and ran away from him, after agreeing to marry him.” He nodded as he met Ardan’s widened stare. “I made sure to inform the man no Deirdre Fiske was in our town, but I know some fool will mention Deirdre’s cookin’.”
Pioneer Desire: The O’Rourke Family Montana Saga, Book Two Page 11