White takes a step towards me just as I dip my toe in the water. It’s cool but not cold, and I step further down. I eye the water suspiciously, looking for any sign of danger. Once I reach the middle of the shallow stream, barely up to my waist, I turn back to White and smile. I crook my finger at him.
I see the moment he gives in, a fire lighting in his eyes right before he unbuttons his waistcoat and shrugs it from his shoulders. His pants follow, leaving him completely nude in front of me, and I grin.
“Hurry up, Rabbit.”
He steps into the water and moves towards me. As soon as he’s close, I wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. He settles us down into the water until only our heads stick out, the cool water rushing around us and caressing our skin. I smile gently at him, threading my fingers through his hair and tugging him close until I can lean my forehead against his.
“Is it true?” I whisper softly, before kissing his nose and leaning back just enough to look into his molten silver eyes.
“What?” he asks, his hands kneading along my back side.
I steel myself.
“That you want to die?” I whisper.
White freezes, his hands falling away, his face slamming down into a mask. I don’t dare react except to hug him harder against me.
Please don’t pull away, I think, as we hover on the edge of something terrifying.
Chapter Twenty-Three
“You heard that, did you?” White whispers, closing his eyes against the words.
I shrug the barest amount even though he can’t see me. When I reach up to caress his ear gently, he shivers in pleasure.
“I’m observant, remember? That extends to being able to listen in on a conversation I normally wouldn’t.”
He sighs, and his lashes flutter open before he leans back. I have the sudden urge to pull him hard against me, but I give him his space, however small. This won’t be an easy conversation.
“I’ve told you that I’m destructive.” His fingers clench at my sides where he supports me in the water. As the stream rushes around us, I feel my body relax even as my shoulders tense at White’s words.
“But you didn’t say you want to die,” I point out. “You didn’t say you’ve hoped for death.”
“A Son of Wonderland can’t die,” he whispers.
“That means nothing!” I snarl. When his eyes snap to mine, I realize I put too much anger and betrayal into those words. “That means nothing,” I say again. “There are a million ways to die without physically being buried.”
White’s ears twitch at my words, those beautiful silver eyes searching mine for whatever haunts me. I don’t know if it’s time to tell him about Neptune, about the other half of me that was ripped away. Neptune had died long before she took her own life. I’d only seen her one last time right before she did it, when she was clear enough to talk as if I were her sister instead of a never-ending money supply. But it had been brief, and there had been too much anger already wrapped around our relationship.
White reaches up and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear where it had fallen free of the ponytail holder. The movement is so tender, I feel my heart squeeze.
“Jupiter, I’ve done things that cannot be forgiven. I’m not someone worthy of your care.” He pauses, as if gathering his words. “Don’t think to save me, Little Inferno. I’ll only take you down with me.”
This time, I don’t hesitate to clamp my hand around his ear and tug him until his face is barely an inch from mine. The scents of wilderness and vanilla drift under my nose as I hold his gaze.
“Stop it.” His eyes absorb me as I utter the words. “You are worth everything, Rabbit. We have all made mistakes. It isn’t about those mistakes. It’s how we live with them.”
He blinks at my words, his hands pulling my body closer against him, until we’re so close, I don’t know where he begins, and I end. I see the pain swirl in his eyes, the phantoms of the past dancing across his mind.
“I can’t live with mine.” The words are so quiet, I almost miss them.
“Wonderland depends on you.”
“Why can’t it depend on someone else?” The words are choked out, agonizing, and there’s so much pain and history in them, I don’t know where to begin. “Why can’t it let me go?”
I blink at the tears that spring to my eyes, trying to prevent them from falling. Now isn’t the time for tears. White doesn’t need them. He needs someone to be here with him. He looks up over my head, his eyes focused on something over my shoulder, attempting to avoid the emotion.
“You can’t,” I tell him. “You can’t say that. I need you to look at me, White.” I grasp both sides of his face and tug him down until his eyes meet my own again. The emotion within the molten silver almost does me in, my heart giving a hard throb in reaction. “You are enough. You are worthy of care. You might have been alone before, but you are not alone now, White.” I hold him closer to me, breathing his air. “I will be your sunshine if you’ll let me.”
White buries his face into the crook of my neck and tightens around me, holding me as if he’s afraid I will disappear.
“My own little fireball.” His words are muffled as he speaks them against my neck, and I shiver.
I lean back just enough to kiss him softly on the lips, a feather-light touch. When I meet his gaze again, I speak.
“You are worth more than your darkness.” I don’t stumble over the words. I don’t look away. I want him to know that I mean it, that I’m here. A prophecy might have brought us together, but no one needs me more than the man wrapped around me. I care what happens to the White Rabbit, and if it’s within my power, I will take some of his burden. “You are everything, Rabbit.” If only these words could have reached Neptune, maybe she would still be alive.
White trembles against me for a moment before his lips press against mine in a feverish kiss. I meet him stroke for stroke, moaning into his mouth as he slips his tongue inside to tangle. One of his hands clench hard in my ponytail, guiding my lips where he sees fit. I grind against him beneath the water, annoyed at the barrier my underwear creates.
White breaks the kiss and trails his lips down my neck, nipping, scraping his teeth across the sensitive skin there.
“I want you,” he groans against me, grinding me down against his hard length.
“I want you, too,” I breathe, my head tilted to the side to give him better access. He lets me control the movement even though his hand is still clenched in my hair. When he hits a specific spot at my throat, I whimper and clench around him.
“We don’t have time.” He doesn’t stop what he’s doing, contradicting his point.
“Then make time.” I reach between us and wrap my hand around his length, pumping my hand.
“Fuck,” he growls, biting me hard enough to bruise. I jump, but don’t release him. “You’re going to be the death of me.”
“No,” I whisper. “I’m going to show you life.”
He pauses barely a second before he’s shoving my underwear to the side and lifting me, entering me in one broad stroke. I throw my head back in ecstasy, the feeling of him inside me taking over. He nips at my breast through my sports bra, sucking hard on the sensitive nipple, at the same moment he begins to grind me against him, pulling out the smallest amount, before slamming back in.
The water around us begins to swirl at our movements, splashing up, churning, but neither of us pays any mind. I cry out when he lifts me enough in the water with one arm to pound into me over and over again.
“That’s it, little fireball,” he groans. “Scream for me.”
I cry out again when his lips crash back on my own, and I suddenly feel as if he’s inhaling my soul, taking in everything that I am, and claiming me as his. It’s a frightening feeling that makes my breathing stutter, but I realize that if I’m going to be claimed, I prefer it to be by the man in front of me. I open wider beneath him, giving him everything I can in the hopes that it will grow his
light a little brighter, and make him realize that life is worth living. He drinks me in, and I let him.
My body begins to tighten, my heart rate erratic as I cry out over and over again each time he slaps against me, hitting me in all the right places. He breaks away to kiss at the sensitive skin where my shoulder meets my neck.
“I’ll never let you go,” he growls, just before he clamps his teeth down on the junction of my neck.
I scream and shatter around him, my body splintering in his arms as he pumps into me a few more times and follows me over the edge with a groan. I blink my eyes at the stars swirling there, my chest rapidly rising and falling with breaths. White stays locked inside me, our bodies joined more than just physically. The feelings should terrify me, but I don’t dwell on them. It’s not like I’m calling it love, but there’s something other about us, something bringing us together that I don’t understand.
Perhaps, it won’t be so bad to be the White Rabbit’s Sunlight. Perhaps, it won’t be so bad to be the day to his night.
The Sun to his Moon.
As I come down from the high, I feel the first tear fall from my eyes. When White kisses it away, I know, he will leave his mark on me, whether I want him to or not.
Chapter Twenty-Four
White says we’re close to the Hatter’s house. I don’t know how he knows that. The trees and giant mushrooms all look the same to me. We don’t have any more trouble with the roots, the beady eyes watching us with hatred as we move past them. Hateful fauna, that’s for sure. I remember the talking flowers of the story books at home. Someone definitely got it wrong.
White had taken care of me after the stream, carrying me from the water and helping me to dress again, before doing the same. We haven’t spoken about the tender moment, about the tears I hadn’t been able to stop as the emotions overwhelmed me. I’m certain it was much more profound than I’m willing to admit yet. White had smiled when he saw the mark on my skin from his bite. I had the urge to throw a bunny joke at him but restrained myself. He seems so happy, I don’t want to annoy him, even if it’s fun for me in the long run.
“How do you know which direction to go?” I had brought a compass with me in my backpack but so far, it has done nothing but spin in circles, never pointing in a particular direction. I log it as another thing in Wonderland that doesn’t make sense.
“I just know. We’re drawn towards each other like a beacon. It’s a perk of being a Son.” He glances back at me and grins at the compass. “Not working for you, huh?”
I frown and tuck it back into my backpack.
“Unfortunately, no.”
“Such instruments don’t work here. A lot of things don’t. The moment you expect something, Wonderland will make sure to do the unexpected.”
“You talk about Wonderland as if it’s a living entity,” I remark.
“That’s because it is. How can she die if she isn’t living?”
I don’t answer since it’s a fair point, not that I have the chance to. An ear-piercing shriek rents the air, and I clamp my hands over the sides of my skull. That feeling of knives being shoved into my ears returns. When I pull my hands away, they’re smeared with blood again. That can’t be good. How are my eardrums not permanently damaged yet?
I watch White turn, panic on his face. Blood drips down his hair from his ears, too much, too bright. He grabs me so suddenly, I almost squeak as the world turns on its axis. He throws me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and starts running. I don’t complain. White runs so much faster than I can. I need to work on my cardio.
“What’s going on?” I shout, trying to gain my bearings.
“The Red Queen’s dogs have found us! If we can just make it to the Hatter’s, we’ll be safe inside.”
The trees fly by quickly, but not nearly fast enough that I don’t watch as beasts slam through the forest behind us. They’re worse than anything I had seen in the Dark Lands, their forms giant and wolf-like. That’s where the similarities end. There are three of them, and each one looks decayed, and missing pieces of flesh where I can see bone and muscle beneath. The center one snarls, and its lips peel back over razor-sharp teeth, the jaw so massive that it not only deepens the sound of the snarl, but the excess skin folds back to cover its face. My hands clench in White’s waistcoat at the sight, terror shooting through me. If they catch us, we’ll be torn to shreds.
“White!”
“I know!” he replies, pushing himself harder. “We’re going to make it. We’re close.” His attempt at reassurance doesn’t make me feel better as I watch them gain more ground. White is fast, but not fast enough. The Bandersnatch howl as if they’re already celebrating their victory. We need to go faster, but I’m at a disadvantage. My body isn’t built for Wonderland. I have no special powers. Wonderland help us!
Suddenly, I watch one of the tree roots rise from the floor behind us, tripping up the lead Bandersnatch. Roots begin rising like a sea behind us, springing into action. It doesn’t slow the beasts down, however, as they crash through the wood, splintering it, as if there’s nothing there. The trees snarl in anger but don’t relent.
We break through the tree line into a clearing, the Bandersnatch right on our tails.
“Almost there,” White shouts. I can’t see the house, but I feel this tugging sensation, as if I’m tuned into the beacon White talked about.
We aren’t close enough.
The lead Bandersnatch leaps forward, its jaws opening wide and grotesque, coming closer. We’re within twenty feet of the house, a fact I have no idea how I know, but we’re still too far away. I realize I’m about to be eaten as the smell of rot and death slam into me. I scream just as White taps on his watch.
The jaw slows down, no longer rushing forward, but I don’t get a chance to study it further. I know White’s powers only last for a moment. I hear the front door of the house open just as White pulls me from his shoulder and throws me as hard as he can towards it. I scream at the sudden release, slamming into a warm body. I throw myself from the mystery person’s arms, ignoring their panicked shouts, to move towards the edge of the porch and reach my hand out for White.
Time speeds up again as he leaps for me, and my eyes widen as the Bandersnatch’s mouth closes in on White.
“No!” I scream, leaning further off the porch, prepared to grab him and pull him up. But this world is dangerous and heartbreaking, and destiny isn’t always kind.
Our fingertips brush just as the Bandersnatch clamps down on White’s ankle and jerks him backwards out of my reach.
Chapter Twenty-Five
“White!” I scream, ready to fling myself from the porch. I don’t know what I plan to do, considering the other two Bandersnatch are circling, waiting for me to step a little further off. The man who caught me grabs my arm. I briefly take in the top hat on his head and the woman by his side before I’m attempting to go to White again.
He screams in agony as the Bandersnatch clamps down harder on his leg. I can hear the bones crunch.
“Stop,” the man holding my arm says. “They can’t harm you while you’re on the porch.”
The Bandersnatch begins to drag White away. I watch in agony as he stabs at the beast with his dagger, but it doesn’t seem to have any effect besides angering it. I slide one of my own knives from my belt and shake off the hand on my arm.
“Don’t!” White screams when he sees me preparing to step off the porch. “Don’t you dare!”
“I’m not going to leave you to them!” I scream, tears spilling over my lashes and dripping over my face. My chest aches as I watch the man I’ve come to care for get dragged away.
“Don’t you dare!” he shouts again, giving me the angriest face he can through the pain. “Stay with the Hatter and Clara.”
The Bandersnatch shakes him, and his scream of agony makes me cringe. I stab the post nearest me in anger. There’s no way I’m letting this happen. The creature with White in its mouth turns and bounds off into the trees. Th
e remaining two pace in front of the porch, watching me. In anger, I pull the knife out of the wood and throw it at the nearest one. The blade embeds in its hindquarters. It lets out a god-awful shriek before they both follow the first.
I whirl on the man and woman behind me, trusting them because White does. He wouldn’t be okay with coming here if he didn’t.
“We have to go get him,” I say, staring up at the man. “You must be the Hatter.” When he nods his head, I turn to the woman. “And Clara?” She nods her head as well, wiping tears from her own face. I appreciate that she’s just as affected by the scene as I am. “I’m Jupiter. Now let’s go.”
“Wait a second,” Clara interrupts. “They’re taking him to the Red Queen.”
“Okay?” I look back and forth between them. “I’m not going to just leave him to her whim. I have to go get him.”
“Alice can’t kill White,” the Hatter says. “If we go without a plan, you’ll surely lose your head. While very brave, it’s very stupid, if you wind up dead.”
I narrow my eyes on the Hatter, taking in his words. His golden eyes meet mine, not budging an inch in his decision. I turn to Clara. “We’re two parts of the triad, right?”
“If you’re White’s mate, then yes.”
I wave her comment away.
“I’m pretty sure we’ve established that. My job is to take away the Red Queen’s immortality, or her powers. How can I do that unless I get close to her, study her weaknesses? I need to know everything.” I watch as Hatter and Clara look at each other, exchanging a silent conversation with their eyes. Clara sighs.
“Can’t we bring March to the house?” she asks Hatter.
“He can’t leave his cabin.” He shakes his head. “He is no longer all there, in case you haven’t noticed. And there will no doubt be Bandersnatch patrolling around his home after last time.”
Late as a Rabbit (Sons of Wonderland Book 2) Page 12