“You live in Seattle. I know what the weather is.”
“Not the point.” I could almost hear him gathering his thoughts and pictured him shaking his head like a dog trying to get water off its fur. “Okay, I guess it changes when there are emotions involved or when you can see yourself dating somebody. Not just getting drunk and letting them suck your dick, but actually having dinner with him and giving him a kiss good night. I’m not sure if I’m explaining it right. Like, when there are emotions involved, not just getting off.”
“That makes sense.” Running things through in my head, I wasn’t sure if that answered my question, though.
Or maybe it did, and I just wasn’t ready to hear it.
I must have been quiet for too long because Gray spoke up again. “You can’t leave me hanging like that. What did you do? Or maybe a better question is, who did you do something with?” I could tell he was trying not to laugh, but I didn’t take offense.
“I haven’t done anything yet. The guy didn’t even know I was aware of what was going on.”
“Wilder!”
I had to smile at his frustration; he was so easy to get wound up. “It’s nothing like what you’re probably imagining. I was having coffee yesterday, and I heard two guys behind me having a conversation. One of the guys has evidently been watching me for a while and…I guess has a crush on me. Although, that sounds like we’re in elementary school again.” It was better than saying he was stalking me, which might worry Gray and had a negative vibe to it.
A chuckle came over the phone. “What did you think about him?”
“He’s attractive. I kind of want to sketch him. I think it would turn out really well.” It was easy to picture my little stalker leaning against the window, waiting for me to draw him. It should’ve been harder to imagine, except I might’ve browsed around the Leashes and Lace website earlier.
I wasn’t sure if that made me the stalker now or not.
“I didn’t ask if you thought he would make a good subject, what you think about him?” He stressed the last word like it should’ve been obvious what he’d meant. I thought I’d answered it reasonably well.
“I’ve only seen him in person once that I remember, and I’m not sure eavesdropping on the conversation counts. So I don’t know what I think about him beyond what he looks like.” That should have been self-explanatory.
Gray sighed like I was testing his patience. “Well, did you think about getting to know him or was it just something interesting? Like, oh it’s cute, the sexy gay guy likes me or was there something else to it?”
“I don’t know, but I can’t get him out of my head.”
“You were the straight guy that every gay guy in the art department tried to seduce. You never seemed to be interested in anyone besides being a little open-minded. He’s not the first gay man to find you attractive or even flirt with you. And let’s face it, a coffee shop isn’t like he bumped into you when you were drunk and horny at a club.”
It was my turn to chuckle. “No, I was very definitely sober. And I think if he’d just come on to me in a bar or something like that, I probably wouldn’t have thought twice about him. This was different. It was sweet.”
“It sounds like you moved beyond a straight guy getting head kind of situation into something possibly romantic. I’m not sure you can call yourself straight when you’re describing this guy as sweet.” Gray said it like we were discussing going after a new commission. It helped keep everything in perspective.
“Probably not.” Gray had been pretty convincing in college when he’d said that getting sucked off didn’t mean someone was gay. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have let him go down on me the first time.
I was starting to think that I should’ve done a little bit more introspection in college. But even looking back, I couldn’t picture myself dating any of the guys who’d hit on me. Of course, it wasn’t always easy to picture dating some of the women that hit on me either. Doctor Barbie or Engineer Barbie never hit on me…it was always Fashion Barbie or Hooker Barbie. No one interesting in the long run.
Gray pushed again. “Are you going to talk to him?”
“Evidently, he’s been at the coffee shop at the same time I’ve been for a while. I’ll probably see him tomorrow.” I still wasn’t sure how I’d missed him. If I couldn’t recognize a stalker, it was probably time to stop reading at lunch.
Gray sighed again. “What are you going to do when you see him?”
“Say hello?” It wasn’t like I had to throw the guy down on the floor in the middle of the coffee shop and kiss him.
Gray snickered. “I’m not expecting you to have sex in the store, Wilder.”
“Getting arrested isn’t high on my to-do list.” I knew how I looked. I’d been going there long enough that the staff knew me. But I wasn’t going to do anything to push my luck and have someone call the cops on the scary guy.
“Are you just going to say hi and leave it at that, or are you actually going to talk to him?” Gray sounded like he was spelling it out for a child.
“Am I going to flirt with him?” I had to admit that might not be the best idea.
Gray laughed. “We both know you’re not terribly good at that. Didn’t you say you were reading? Maybe he’d be interested in your book.”
I started shaking my head before the words even came out. “Probably not.”
Gray laughed again. “What are you reading this time?”
I sighed. “Gone with the Wind. I’ve been alternating between classics and more modern series. And after reading The Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, I was looking for something lighter.”
“Only you would call that lighter.”
“What? It’s almost a romance, and it’s one book, not a dozen in a series.”
“Okay, no book conversations yet. Any clue what he does for a living? Maybe that would work.”
The conversation just kept getting more interesting. “He’s basically a model.”
I knew it wasn’t going to be enough. Gray was quiet for a moment. “What does he model?”
He was so suspicious.
In this case, however, he was right to question it. “He models lingerie on a website and seems to have a blog. He works down the street from the shop.”
Gray was quiet for several seconds. “Lingerie as in women’s underwear? Like panties?”
“Yes, but not for women. They seem to be made for men.”
“Interesting.” It sounded like he was trying to figure out how to respond, so I just waited. “I always knew you’d fall for somebody different. I’m starting to think I should’ve broadened my definition of that.”
Me too.
“We’re going to set the job stuff aside for the time being—but don’t think I’m not going to come back to that later. I say just talk to him and see what happens. Let it grow from there and don’t really worry about labels right now. You’ll figure that part out. For right now, see if you want to get to know him and if you can see taking things in a romantic physical direction.”
“That seems too easy, but it makes sense.” Gray had a way of boiling things down to their simplest pieces.
Getting your cock sucked didn’t necessarily mean you were gay or bi—wanting to get to know the guy who was crushing on you or going to town on your dick probably did.
“You know you’re going to have to call me tomorrow and let me know how it goes. Preferably earlier in the day so I don’t have to wait hours to figure out what happened.”
Gray had me shaking my head. “So you don’t want to wait until tomorrow night for the next episode in the soap opera?”
He laughed. “Absolutely not. Think of this as binge-watching, not once-a-week traditional TV.”
“Gotcha.” Generally, I wasn’t much for sharing my personal life, but I had a feeling that if I didn’t call, he was going to.
Gray would not be a quiet stalker.
Chapter 4
Lane
“You look l
ike you just robbed a jewelry store, Eli. What aren’t you telling me?” I knew that expression. I’d seen it a thousand times, and it always meant trouble. As we entered the coffee shop, I had a feeling I should have noticed it sooner.
“You worry too much.” Eli smirked, ruining the I’m-so-innocent act.
“No, I think I should be worrying more.” Glancing back at Eli, I frowned at him. “And don’t think I didn’t notice you ignored my question.”
He’d promised not to drive me crazy like he had on Wednesday. That was the only reason I’d let him come, but I was starting to second-guess my decision. Eli was always honest and stuck to a promise, but it was the fine print I’d always known to be mindful of when it came to him.
I’d been so careful.
We’d talked about teasing me and making comments about tattoo guy in the coffee shop. We’d even gone over specific rules about conversation topics. He’d been agreeable and enthusiastic—too agreeable, I realized as I stood there looking at him.
He shrugged, not bothered about my suspicion. “I’m going to be on my best behavior today.”
I wasn’t buying it for a minute.
For a moment I questioned myself about why I was even there, but then as I turned around I remembered. I was a pathetic stalker and my obsession was right there.
Like right there!
“Hello.”
Fuck.
He was standing in the doorway like he was waiting for me. Not quite smiling, his eyes were crinkled up like he was trying not to laugh, and he was looking straight at me. Taking a step back reflexively, I bumped into Eli.
He was almost giggling, he was so excited. “Eli, what the hell did you do?”
“Nothing.” The grin in his voice said he’d done something.
Tattoo guy cocked his head and took the question seriously. “Would you prefer I answer that for him, or was it a rhetorical question?”
Huh?
“Um, I don’t know.”
“I’m perfectly innocent, but I forgot that I have a date with Roman in a few minutes. I’ll see you later.” Eli started to step away, but I reached back and grabbed his arm.
What was he thinking, leaving me like that?
He leaned in and gave me a hug. When he was close, he whispered low enough for the other people in the shop not to overhear. “You’ll be fine. Roman owes me a spanking because I was absolutely terrible this morning, and I can’t wait. Call me later.”
Then he was gone.
Tattoo guy shook his head as he watched Eli leave. “He’s very…interesting.”
I almost laughed. “Yep, that’s Eli.”
We both just stood there awkwardly. Neither of us seemed to know what to do next. With anyone else, I would have taken it as a sign that it wasn’t meant to be, but standing there with the towering man, I just thought it was cute.
If he was nervous too, then it might not be so bad.
He finally seemed to make some kind of internal decision because he glanced at the counter and then back to me. “Can I buy you a cup of coffee or something?”
I wasn’t even going to pretend that it was a date, but just the idea of it made me smile. “Yes, thank you. Um, hot chocolate?”
I had a feeling I wasn’t going to need any help staying awake later. My heart was already going a hundred miles an hour. His eyes sparkled like he found it funny, but he simply nodded. “Sure, why don’t you grab us a table?” He looked around the room. “They’re busier than usual today.”
As much as I wanted to find out what was actually going on, I had to agree with him. There was a table toward the back of the restaurant open, the one I’d sat at with Eli earlier in the week, and another toward the front. I gestured at the two. “Do you have a preference?”
I wasn’t sure he did, because he’d been at every table in the place at least once, but he surprised me. Pointing toward the front table, he nodded. “That one.”
He must’ve seen my confusion, because he smiled. As serious as he usually looked, I loved the amusement that was radiating from him. “The one in the back isn’t as quiet as you think. Something about the placement of the table makes the words echo.”
Fuck.
“Do I owe you an apology?” He wasn’t angry, that was evident. But between my conversation with Eli and the fact that I’d clearly been watching him, there was probably an apology needed in there somewhere.
Tattoo guy was still grinning, but shook his head. “No, I don’t think I mind being stalked.”
I could feel the heat starting to creep up my face. Yeah, I owed the guy an apology. Especially since I still didn’t even know his first name. His smile just widened as he pointed to the table. “Go grab it before somebody else does. I’ll be right over there.”
The last thing I wanted to do was walk away from him. I still had so many questions. But since it honestly looked like he was going to sit down and have coffee with me, I forced myself to relax and walk over to the table. I wasn’t the most aggressive guy when it came to dating. I liked when things were laid out first so I could see it in my mind before I went into the situation.
With almost any other guy, I would have assumed that this was a date. A quick meet up for coffee to see if we had chemistry and if I really was a stalker. But with him, I wasn’t so sure.
He gave off mixed signals, but it was clear he was curious about me. But aside from him paying, and waiting by the door for me, nothing about it felt like a traditional date. That wasn’t a bad thing, but it made me nervous.
I hadn’t been as sure as Eli that the guy was even gay. He really had that relaxed straight guy look. I’d never worried that he would freak out at the idea that I found him attractive, but nothing about him said he was anything but heterosexual.
He spoke to the barista too quietly for me to hear, so as he started walking back over to the table, I still didn’t know his name. I was just going to have to ask. Luckily, he seemed to understand my dilemma, or maybe he just had good manners. As he sat down, he stuck out his hand. “Lane? Right? I’m Wilder.”
I groaned. “You really could hear everything the other day.”
He chuckled. “Oh yes, it was the most interesting lunch break I’ve had in ages…maybe ever.”
I tried to think back to everything we’d said, but there was no way to remember it all. “I’m sitting here a little mortified, trying to figure out what other embarrassing things I might’ve said.”
“You mean besides your stalking tendencies?”
My laugh came out slightly strangled, and I looked down at the table, trying to find something else to focus on. “Yes.”
“I figured out you worked at the…clothing company down the street. You also had interesting lines about where good stalking crossed into bad stalking. Tattoos interest you, but you’re not ready to make a commitment. Your mother doesn’t know much about your personal life. And I think that’s it for the most part.” I could hear the laughter in his voice, although he was doing his best to keep it from escaping.
I just wanted to let my head fall to the table so I could hide. Forcing myself not to look like more of an idiot, I ignored the blush that was still heating up my face and tried to sound like a functional adult. “So you know a lot about me, but I barely even know your name.”
He gave me a skeptical look. “You’re not a very good stalker if you don’t know anything else about me yet. Fess up, what do you know?”
Smiling, a little less embarrassed somehow, I nodded. “Okay, so maybe I know a little.”
“Like what?”
I thought back to the things that had first caught my attention. “You like to read. You’re good with kids once they’re out of that screamy, drooly stage. You work non-traditional hours and take your lunch break about three o’clock in the afternoon at least three days a week. You seem to like reading books in a series and sometimes you doodle on napkins without realizing what you’re doing.”
“You’re a better stalker than I thought. I’
m not sure if I should be worried about you. That face is sweet and innocent, but you might be as crazy as your friend.”
“Just observant. Not nuts.”
He leaned forward against the table, his elbows coming to rest on the top. “Observant how?”
I shrugged, not sure if the story would make me sound more normal or kind of pathetic. “I didn’t start off watching you insanely. The first time I noticed you was because there was a lady in here with like a dozen kids who were all going in different directions and she needed caffeine badly. You kept some of the older ones occupied for just a minute by drawing things on the napkins and made faces at the other ones to keep them entertained.”
He nodded absently, smiling. “Oh, I remember that. It was ages ago.”
I reached out and started playing with a little sign on the table that was advertising new drinks. “It caught my attention. It was at odds with how I thought someone with that many tattoos and…well, it just wasn’t what I imagined.”
Was there a right way to say that someone who looked like he might run a biker gang shouldn’t look that cute playing with kids?
Probably not.
“Then I noticed you reading the next time I saw you and that just had me looking for you more whenever I would come. One thing led to another…” I shrugged, not sure what to say next that wouldn’t sound weird.
He shook his head like he was disappointed or shocked, but the laughter in his eyes made it clear he didn’t mind. “One thing led to another and then you found you were a stalker.”
“It really is your fault.”
“For being so cute with kids or for being literate?”
“Both.” Then deciding to just go with it, I glanced down at his arms where tattoos were peeking out from under the sleeves of his T-shirt. “And don’t forget the tattoos.”
Or the muscles, but I kept that to myself for the time being. No reason to keep the conversation going in that direction until I knew where I stood with him. A coffee date didn’t mean gay…did it?
It could’ve meant he was curious.
It could’ve meant he was lonely and wanted attention.
Leashes & Lace Books 1-3: MM Romance Boxed Set Page 37