I didn’t want to rush him, but I also didn’t want to give myself anything else to fantasize over. That would just be torture.
The look on Wilder’s face had everything in me sitting up and taking notice, including my dick. “Then when you come over later this week, how about you bring a few things to show me?”
I wasn’t sure if it felt like we were moving too fast or not fast enough.
Would it be just like show-and-tell where he got to see how it looked on a real person, or was he imagining something else? The more I got to know him, the more I hoped that he didn’t want to just look.
“I’d like that.” I felt my face heating, and I finally glanced away. Looking down at the table, I didn’t let my nerves chase me away from my question. “What kinds of things do you want me to bring?”
The website had a huge variety. I’d worn everything from sweet nightgowns to sexy panties. What had caught his eye?
Wilder was quiet long enough that I peeked up to see what he was doing. He was taking the question seriously, and the look of concentration on his face was cute. Finally, he shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe something like that short…it’s not really a nightgown, but it kind of looks that way in the picture. It was a cream color and didn’t go down very far and the background was kind of dark.”
I knew what he was talking about. It wasn’t something recent, so he had to have spent quite a while browsing through the site to find it. “I have something similar. I can bring that over.”
A teasing, curious grin broke out across his face. “And I wouldn’t say no to something like the underwear that you were wearing in your blog last week.”
Oh.
He was definitely going for the show in show-and-tell. Those panties hadn’t left much to the imagination, even in a selfie. Deciding to go with it, I tried to let him see how the conversation was affecting me. “I have a few different colors. What would you prefer, black, white, red, or pink?”
Wilder shifted just enough in his seat to give me wicked thoughts. “I liked the white ones in the picture, but how about you bring the black ones and the pink ones?”
My dick was so hard that when I stood up, I knew he would notice. “All right.”
My brain wasn’t really working. There was more I should have said, but it just wouldn’t come out. Teasing, sexy things were flowing through my mind, but all I could do was blush and sit there like an idiot.
Not that Wilder seemed to mind.
No, he seemed to enjoy making me crazy. “Should we get the table cleaned up? I can’t wait to curl up on the couch with you.”
Nothing about the movie, no comment about relaxing, just that he wanted to sit down with me. Nothing even hinted that he was nervous about what might happen. It made my stomach start to whirl. Even if all he did was hold me, it would be one of the best dates ever.
Chapter 9
Wilder
It was exciting but felt perfectly normal. It felt so different, but routine at the same time. All the pieces were familiar, but the way it all combined was unique. I’d dated. I’d fooled around with guys. I’d met people that I found a connection with quickly. Something about Lane made it special when the parts all combined together.
It should have made me hesitant or at the very least nervous, but as we curled up on the couch, I couldn’t wait to see where everything led. Nothing about his behavior said he needed to rush, but he hadn’t tried to hide the fact that he found me desirable. That had been easy to see in his eyes.
And in his flirting.
Taking things one step at a time and seeing where they led seemed like the best idea. Unfortunately, the rational part of my brain was at odds with other parts of me—and it wasn’t just my dick. I wanted to see him and sketch him, and I wanted to see if I could capture the look on his face that was sometimes in his pictures.
A lot of the guys on the website kept their faces obscured, but Lane didn’t seem to worry about that. If the situations were reversed, I wasn’t sure if I would have been able to put my face online. Not out of fear or shame, but it felt like he was sharing a big part of who he was.
He kept saying that he wasn’t interested in showing that part of himself in public, but I had to wonder if that wasn’t completely true. Maybe he just wasn’t ready to admit that he wanted it. If he let people see that part of himself online, it just made sense in my head that eventually, it would come out in other ways.
It was something I’d have to consider, especially if we were looking at starting a serious relationship, but I wasn’t sure if it would make a difference. Meeting him for dinner in those slim-fitting sexy jeans and heels didn’t seem outrageous. Mentally shifting the image around in my head, I pictured him in a skirt and those same heels. The right skirt would probably make his ass look fabulous, but other than that I didn’t think I cared.
We wouldn’t look like the kind of couple people were expecting, but I had a feeling with me at his side we wouldn’t get that many comments. When you were well over six feet, built a little bit like a football player, and covered in tattoos, it wasn’t surprising that people left you alone.
I would’ve probably had to date an alien before somebody made a comment. Even then, I had a feeling the waiter would just nod and tell me that he’d bring our drinks shortly.
After we’d finished dinner, I’d helped Lane clean up the mess, and we moved over to the couch. He’d been a little unsure about where to sit, but I knew it was only because he was trying to be careful of me. It was nice of him, but not needed.
I liked the idea of getting to hold him.
I hadn’t been a very tactile person going into college, but it hadn’t taken long for my bubble to have been burst completely. Being surrounded by so many other artistic people, I’d been swamped with classmates and roommates and friends who hugged and touched everyone.
Maybe it was because of my experiences in college or maybe it was just Lane, but as I wrapped my arms around him, it just felt right. “Is this okay? I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, but I’d like it if you were closer.”
Lane stiffened, then cocked his head at me. “Are you sure?”
Nodding, trying not to smile, I did my best not to sound too enthusiastic. “Yes, I’m sure.”
“Then, yes, it’s fine.”
I was hoping it would end up being more than fine, but I knew he was just worried about rushing me. It was sweet but unnecessary. Or at least that was what I was starting to think. Pulling him closer as the movie started to play, I twisted and leaned back against the arm of the couch so he was resting on my chest.
He was warm, and the harder angles of his body were different but not wrong. It was just weird enough that it felt familiar and awkward at the same time. My body remembered similar times in the past, but this was new and special. Lane was special.
He was still rigid in my arms, but as the movie started to play, he gradually relaxed. It wasn’t exactly what I’d pictured in the beginning, but as time went on, his body curled into me. Once he realized that I was completely comfortable holding him, one arm came up, and he wrapped it around my bicep, absently caressing the tattoos that were just peeking out of my shirt sleeve.
When he shifted and his head came to rest against my neck, he stretched his legs out down the couch and I was finally able to relax. I wasn’t sure the best way to describe it, but it was nice. There was nothing stressful about it and nothing that made me uneasy.
I was just finally getting to hold the man who’d made me so intrigued.
Lane’s fingers finally inched under the sleeve and started tracing patterns and randomly caressing me. I knew it wasn’t necessarily something sexual for him, but my body was having a hard time remembering that. He was pressed tightly against me and the slow touches were too much for my cock. The way we were both positioned, though, I couldn’t be sure that he knew how he was affecting me.
It was a little bit distracting.
I’d wanted to watch the sci-fi movie
I’d picked out, but that was almost impossible. Next time we did something like this, I told myself I’d have to remember to pick out something I wasn’t really interested in seeing. My focus was on Lane, not the space battles.
The confidence in his touch made me comfortable enough that I let my hands start to wander and caress. Nothing crazy, but when I started rubbing his side and the area of his back that I could reach, he arched and pressed into my hand just enough to encourage me. The silent hint to keep going had me curious about what else would feel good to him.
My brain drummed over and over that we weren’t going to rush, but my body wasn’t completely on board with the idea. I loved the way his muscles flexed and the hard planes of his abs pushed me to keep exploring his body, but it wasn’t until he turned and laid his back on my chest that I knew he wanted more as well.
I shifted, and the new position had my legs stretched down the couch with his body cradled between my thighs. His head rested against my neck, and his hands started caressing my legs as he watched the movie. I wanted to know what was going through his head, but part of me thought that would make both of us uncomfortable. And really, overthinking it was the last thing I wanted to happen at that moment.
I wrapped my arms around him and let my hands rest against his chest. We should have had a discussion before things continued. But as my fingers started caressing his chest, I knew that he would have said something if I’d made him uncomfortable. Lane was an interesting mix of reservations and openness, but he’d always been very honest about what he was thinking.
The way we were positioned had his back pressed flush against the front of my body. There was no hiding my body’s reaction to his. Maybe that made him more comfortable, but as my fingers skimmed lightly over his chest, his body relaxed again and sank into me. He wasn’t just lying on me; it was almost like he wanted me to wrap myself around him.
When I caressed over his nipples, his entire body tightened, but in a way that made me smile and do it again. He made a low, breathy sound that let me know just how sensitive he was. When my hands moved down his chest, he made a quiet sound of protest that had me chuckling. He clearly wanted my hands back at his nipples, but he hadn’t said anything.
Was it because he wasn’t comfortable asking?
Was it because he wanted to let me explore and set the pace?
Was it his way of solidly putting the control in my hands?
There were too many possibilities, and I had to admit, I liked the idea of him giving up control. He’d made little comments at dinner that had me curious about his interest in other things. I had a feeling that his kinks didn’t stop at sexy underwear.
I kept my touch light and slow as I caressed his chest. I wanted to go faster, but there was a part of me that felt a rush of pleasure with every reaction and every little hint at Lane’s growing impatience. When his silence finally broke, he made me chuckle.
“You’re trying to make me crazy, aren’t you?” Frustration was clear in his voice, but I didn’t get a sense that he was trying to rush me. It was more of an acknowledgment than anything else.
“Yes.” I liked his little reactions, but knowing I was pushing his buttons made everything even better.
Lane groaned and seemed to make some kind of internal decision because the subtle reactions were slowly fading to something more obvious. He arched up into my touch, inadvertently rubbing his lower back against my cock. It sent a shiver through both of us, and it made me think that it was the first time he’d realized how turned on I was as well.
I chuckled and brought my hands back up to his nipples. Lightly circling them, I was completely focused on the anticipation I felt building in him. “You like being teased.”
It wasn’t really a question, but Lane nodded. “Yes.”
His answer came out slightly breathy and filled with more need than I’d heard from him before. It pushed away any reservations that may have been working in the back of my mind, and let me focus solely on him. “I like teasing. But that means that I’m in control of how fast or how slow I go. Is that what you want?”
Yeah, we were really going to need to have a few more discussions. But as his head nodded enthusiastically, and he pressed upward just enough to let me know it was what he really wanted, the thoughts of a discussion faded away. No, at that moment, the only thing I wanted was to figure out what else made him crazy and push him to the edge.
As my thumbs gradually tightened the circles I was making on his chest until they were almost skimming over his nipples, I decided to see what else he might enjoy. “You want to be good for me, don’t you? You don’t want to be naughty. No, I think you like being very good for me.”
It wasn’t exactly dirty talk, but he let out a moan and nodded. It was all the encouragement I needed. Letting the pads of my thumb caress over the stiff peaks I could feel through his shirt, I let my voice deepen. “I like the idea of you being very good for me. You’re a bit reserved and careful in public, but I think when you let that all go you’re a sexy little thing that wants a firm hand. Aren’t you?”
Yes, he didn’t really want attention in public, or at least that’s what he said, but in private, it would be something completely different. He just needed the chance to see that it wouldn’t scare me off. No, if anything, the stuff I’d seen on the website had only made me more curious about him. Anything else he wanted in the bedroom would be fine with me.
Lane made needy little sounds and nodded slowly. Was he unsure about sharing that side of himself with me or was he concerned about what I would think?
“I can’t wait to see how you’ll look when I have you so turned on you can’t think. I’m going to take my time exploring everything that makes you crazy.”
“Now?” The desire and caution in his voice seemed to be tangled up together.
“A little bit tonight. But I can’t wait until you come over to my place.” I tried to let him hear how much I wanted him.
As turned on as I was, and as much as I wanted him, this wasn’t casual or just an excuse to get off. He was so much more than that. As sure as I was that I was making the right decision, there were so many things running through me it was hard to pin them down.
Lane moaned, and I could hear more frustration in his voice. “How little tonight?”
I couldn’t resist smiling as I pinched his nipples through his shirt. He squirmed, and a whimper came out, but his hips thrusting up made it clear he liked the quick flash of pain.
“Please, yes.” I wanted to hear more begging from him, but the first careful pleas were so earnest and open, I had to reward him. I moved my hands away from his chest, and listened as he whimpered in protest. But when my hands started sliding up under his shirt, the sounds of protest turned to anticipation.
His skin was so smooth I wanted to just lie there caressing him. The pictures online had made it clear he waxed or something, but the reality of feeling it was incredible. The flat planes and sharp angles of a man’s body but with the soft, touchable skin that I’d never associated with a guy were addicting.
“I like hearing you beg.” My fingers went back to circling around the nubs on his chest, and he seemed to be fighting the urge to thrust up against me again. “Very good, you know you need to wait, don’t you?”
Lane’s head moved up and down, and another whimper escaped. “Please touch me, please.”
The pleading words went right to my cock. Rewarding him, I finally flicked my fingers over his stiff peaks, and I felt a shiver run through him. “Very good; I think you need a reward.”
Before the words were even out, I pinched his nipples again, this time just a little harder. He moaned, and his hips thrust up again. Relaxing my touch, I went back to the slower teasing caresses. “So responsive. I love watching you react.”
Letting the slow circles get closer and closer to his nubs, I finally asked the question that had been on my mind for a while. “You like a little bit of pain when I play with your nipples, but what abo
ut other parts of your body? What else do you like, my little stalker?”
He was such a curious mix that it didn’t surprise me when he blushed, and needed a minute before he continued. “Yes…everywhere…”
It wasn’t enough information, but it was enough to earn him another reward. Pinching his nipples again, I made a low, pleased sound. “Very good, tell me what else, though. Tell me what you like.”
Maybe it was because he’d finally gotten his thoughts together, or maybe it was just because I’d made it an order, not a question, but the words came out easier. “I like pain mixed with the pleasure. Not a lot, but this, and spanking, things like that.”
He did such a good job, I stopped teasing him and focused all the pleasure on his nipples. He squirmed and whimpered, the movie clearly forgotten as the pleasure seemed to build. The little movements of his body had him grinding his ass against me. I couldn’t remember a time when I’d been harder, even though I was still clothed and technically so was he.
Lane’s cock was clearly outlined through his pants. He couldn’t hide how turned on he was even if he’d wanted to. His hips kept making jerky movements, which he tried to control, but it was almost impossible. “Please, more, please let me come.”
Lane was begging for more, but I didn’t want to automatically assume it was what he really meant. I let one hand start moving down toward his pants, slowly caressing over his chest and abs, and relief seemed to flood through him.
“Yes, please, that’s what I want. Thank you.” Once he seemed to understand that I liked hearing the needy words, his hesitation fell away, and the pleading seemed to come more naturally.
Focusing on him gave me a single-minded purpose that felt right. It was like something we’d be doing forever, not just a fleeting pleasure. When I reached the waistband of his jeans, I let my fingers tease along the edges. He squirmed and made sexy little noises. I could see that his eyes were clenched tight and the white grip that he had on my legs grew firmer, like he was barely restraining himself.
“That’s what you want, isn’t it? Give me the words I want to hear, my sweet stalker.” Yes, I wanted his consent, but I also wanted to hear him say it.
Leashes & Lace Books 1-3: MM Romance Boxed Set Page 42