by Emmy Eugene
“Nothing.”
Janelle toed the ground, which set her to swaying too. “Why can’t you just let Kadence swing too? There’s two swings.”
Kelly looked up at her. “I want to go see Daddy this weekend.”
Confusion pulled through Janelle, making her eyebrows pinch downward. “What?”
“He called and said he’s in town and wants to see us. He said he went to the house, and we weren’t there.”
Janelle held her breath, because she hated with the heat of a volcano that Henry called Kelly without her knowledge. But he’d bought her a phone that only did texts and calls, and he was her father. He and Janelle had exchanged words about it a dozen times, but the fact was, Henry did what Henry wanted.
Always.
Janelle wished she could tell Kelly that, but she never had and she wouldn’t.
“He hasn’t called me,” Janelle said, taking out her phone. “Look.” She handed the phone to Kelly, who did look at it.
“Can you call him?” She handed the phone back. “When I told Kadence, she whined—she’s always whining—and said she didn’t want to go with Daddy. But I do.”
Janelle gazed out over the peaceful land at Chestnut Ranch. She didn’t want to drive her daughter back into town for Henry, but she sure didn’t want him coming out here. It angered her that he’d gone to the house too, because that was just another ploy to try to get back into Janelle’s life.
“You just spent last weekend with him,” she said. “More than that. Wednesday to Sunday.”
“He said that movie I want to see is playing tonight,” Kelly said. “And he can take me.”
Janelle resisted the urge to exhale loudly. Classic Henry, trying to swoop in with a gift or something that made him look like the good guy. Janelle couldn’t blame Kelly for falling for it though. She herself had too—many times. More times than she cared to admit.
Foolishness raced through her at the memories of how she’d swept his behavior under the rug. How she’d made excuses for him for years. How she’d let his flowers, gemstones, and boxes of chocolates make things “right” between them when they’d been shattered for so long.
And she didn’t want Kelly’s heart to be in tatters the way hers was. But she couldn’t keep her husband from her daughter, or vice versa.
“Just you?” she finally asked.
“I guess Kadence can come,” Kelly said, her voice sullen.
“I’ll talk to Daddy,” Janelle said, getting out of the swing. “Maybe it would be good for Kadence and I to spend some time together alone.” With that, she walked away from Kelly, who said something under her breath.
Janelle wanted to march right back over to her and tell her to stop acting like such a brat. She didn’t, because she didn’t need to get into a full-blown fight with her ten-year-old on her boyfriend’s ranch.
With level-ten annoyance filling her, she dialed her ex.
“Janelle,” he said pleasantly, as if they were getting together for a dinner-movie date later that night.
“Henry,” she bit out. “You called Kelly about a movie tonight?”
“Oh, right,” he said, as if he’d forgotten. Janelle rolled her eyes heavenward and sent a prayer up too that maybe the Good Lord could help her out for just a moment. “Are the girls available?”
“They haven’t been getting along,” Janelle said, her tone angry even to her own ears. “So I think it would be best if you just took Kelly tonight.”
“Well, the movie’s at three-thirty…” He let the words hang there.
Janelle sighed. “I’ll meet you at the intersection of highway thirty-seven and Longmire in thirty minutes.”
“Really? We have to meet on the side of the road?”
“You already went to my house,” she snapped. “We’re not home. You’re putting me out as it is.”
“I can just come get her. Where are you?”
“Not happening,” Janelle said. “See you in thirty minutes.” She hung up, not caring that Henry was in the middle of a sentence. She stared straight ahead for several long moments until her vision faded from bright red and back to normal. Then she sighed, turned around, and walked back over to where Kelly still sat in the swing.
“Let’s go,” she said.
“Right now?” Kelly looked up at her, surprise in her face. “It’s my turn to nail first.”
Janelle glared down at her daughter. “Do you want to go to the movies with Daddy or not?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Kelly stood up, her eyes bright and zero guilt on her face. She was already turning into a teenager, where everything was about her. Janelle wasn’t ready for it, and she was ill-equipped to deal with her attitude and manipulations.
“Then we’re going now. Come on.” Janelle started across the lawn toward the driveway, already lifting her phone to her ear to make another call, this one to Russ.
He’d be fine with Kadence while she drove Kelly in to meet Henry. She knew that. She just didn’t want to explain to him why she was leaving.
“Hey, baby,” he said easily, nothing like the false tone she’d heard in Henry’s voice. Everything that was tight inside Janelle loosened, and she sighed. “You okay?”
“Yes,” she said, deciding this little hiccup in the plans was not going to ruin her day. “I’m taking Kelly into town to meet Henry. Can you keep Kadence while I’m gone?”
“No problem.” Curiosity rode in his tone now, but Russ didn’t ask any other questions.
“Thank you,” she said. “I’ll be back in a little bit.”
“Can’t wait,” he said, and the call ended. Janelle didn’t say anything to Kelly, the tension between them as thick as mud.
The drive happened in silence, and Henry’s sports car waited on the patch of dirt where she usually left her sedan when she met Russ here. “Go on,” she said to Kelly after she’d stopped.
Kelly got out of the car and said, “Thanks, Momma,” before closing the door.
Janelle’s fingers gripped and re-gripped the steering wheel as she glared at the shiny, black car. Henry had apparently just washed it, as it gleamed in the weak winter sunlight.
Kelly got in the car, and a moment later, Henry got out.
Janelle wanted to peel out, spitting gravel in his face as she left. But she took the high road and rolled down her window as he approached. “Thank you,” he said, and he seemed genuine.
Janelle reminded herself that he’d seemed that way a lot in the past, and it was never once true. “Yep.”
“I’ll bring her home tonight? Say around nine? Is that too late?”
“Nine is fine.” Janelle kept her eyes out the windshield, refusing to look at him.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt you at the ranch,” he said.
Janelle swung her gaze toward him, and he was oh-so-handsome and perfectly perched as he’d balanced one arm against the top of her car and leaned down to see her through the open window.
“Yes, you did,” she said. “Don’t lie to me. That might work on the girls, but I know better.”
Henry looked like she’d splashed ice water in his face, and he straightened. He tapped the top of her car a couple of times and said, “All right. See you later, Janelle,” before he walked away.
A mixture of guilt and powerful satisfaction dove through her. Her heart pounded with the extra doses of adrenaline, and she clutched the steering wheel again. Why couldn’t she be a little mean? The tiniest bit unkind?
He’d cheated on her with eight other women while they’d been married. Eight. He’d thrown her to curb time and time again, and she was supposed to just turn the other cheek? Forgive him over and over? Welcome him back into her life—and her daughter’s lives?
No.
But maybe yes.
She sighed, some of her fury going with the air as it left her lungs. She could forgive him. She could turn the other cheek.
But that didn’t mean she needed to forget what he’d done. It didn’t mean she condoned it, or that she had to open
herself up to getting hurt again. She didn’t have to be his doormat—she wouldn’t.
Her phone rang, and Russ’s name sat on the screen. Sweet, thoughtful, kind Russ. He was white if Henry was black. Day while Henry was night.
She swiped on the call, tears gathering in her eyes. “Hey.”
“Sweetheart,” he said. “You okay? Kadence and I can come get you, and we’ll go get ice cream.”
She nodded, because she didn’t want him to hear the tears in her voice. She never let them fall, and she blinked them back now too. Henry fired up his fancy car and left, turning to go south instead of north where he lived.
“Kadence says ice cream sounds awesome,” Russ said. “So we’re already heading to the truck, okay? Where are you?”
Janelle drew in a deep breath and cleared her throat. Cleared all the emotion from her chest. Cleared all the painful memories and hurt feelings and inadequacies from her memory. “Our usual place,” she said.
“Be there in ten,” Russ promised, and Janelle knew that when the cowboy promised something, he would follow through, unlike her ex-husband.
“Okay.” The call ended, and Janelle slumped in her seat. She had ten minutes to rid herself of the anxiety, the worry, the fear, and the tears. Russ deserved the best version of herself. Kadence did too.
And she would give it to them.
Chapter Fifteen
Russ pulled up to Janelle’s house, a new kind of freedom beating its wings through his bloodstream. Because today, he was going to go in through the front door. In fact, Janelle appeared on the front stoop while Russ still sat in his truck, and he reached quickly to unbuckle his seatbelt.
When he and Kadence had arrived to pick her up for ice cream yesterday afternoon, Russ had sensed her turmoil. But she’d covered over it with a smile and her cute Texas twang. She’d held her daughter’s hand as they scoped out the ice cream flavors, and she’d kept the conversation going even when Russ ran out of things to say.
She hadn’t come back to the ranch after that, and he’d said goodbye to her on the side of the road again. Needless to say, there was no kissing involved, and Russ’s heart had hurt for the rest of the day.
He didn’t know how to deal with an ex-spouse, and he didn’t know how to ask Janelle what she was thinking about Henry. He didn’t want to anger her again, or upset her, and while he’d previously believed ice cream could fix everything, after yesterday afternoon, he wasn’t so sure anymore.
“Hey,” he said as he closed the truck door. “How’s your day?”
She wore a long, black dress that flowed in waves around her body. She was sleek and sophisticated, and Russ wondered what in the world she was doing with him. This woman, with her beautiful brown hair that fell in curls over her shoulders and those perfectly painted pink lips, belonged with the posh, casual man Russ had run into at the hardware store.
No matter what, Janelle definitely didn’t look like a rancher’s wife.
“Good,” she said, her fingertips touching the brim of his cowboy hat. He tensed as she removed the hat completely and gazed at him silently.
Russ didn’t move and he didn’t speak. So much was said between them anyway, and Russ hoped he was conveying the right things.
“Kelly’s already set up in the kitchen,” she said, her voice pleasant. She seemed normal today, and Russ wondered how she compartmentalized everything so easily. Maybe she didn’t. Maybe she was pretending.
“What are you thinking?” he asked as she started to move.
She froze again, her eyes coming back to his. “I’m thinking I’m sure glad you’re here.” She dropped her gaze to his hand, which she took in both of hers. “Henry was here all morning, and it’s a relief that he’s gone.”
Surprise darted through Russ, and his pulse picked up speed. “Henry was here all morning?”
“He kept Kelly overnight and brought her back this morning. And then.” She exhaled heavily. “He wouldn’t leave. Kept asking me questions about the dogs, and you, and your ranch.” She wouldn’t look at him, and Russ didn’t know what to make of that.
Russ really didn’t like that her ex had hung out all morning at his girlfriend’s place. But what was he supposed to do? He’d worked all morning, first with the animals, then on the dog enclosure, and then held a staff meeting for that week’s task list. They had their final mowing of the year to do, as well as the last of the winterizing. The cattle needed to be checked more regularly when the weather turned wet, and Russ had schedule himself and Darren for that, hoping to get some insight from the older cowboy about his relationship with Janelle.
He hadn’t spoken to Rex about what he’d seen in the bathroom, and Travis had disappeared into his woodshop, leaving the homestead to Russ and the dogs last night. In all honesty, Russ had been fine with that. He didn’t want to talk about his relationship with his brothers anyway. Maybe Travis.
He missed Seth, and he couldn’t wait until his even-keeled, good-natured brother returned from his honeymoon.
“What did you tell him about me, my ranch, and the dogs?” Russ asked.
“Normal stuff.” Janelle shrugged. “He asked if we were serious.”
“And?” Russ really wanted to know how she’d answered that question.
She finally looked at him, and she was as serious as a nun in church on Sunday. “I told him we were.”
A smile played with Russ’s lips.
“Is that what you would’ve said?” she asked.
“Yes.” His whispered word barely met his own ears, but he knew Janelle had heard him by the way her eyes crinkled as she gave him half a smile.
She enveloped herself into his arms then, and Russ held her right there on her driveway. She didn’t shake or shiver, and she didn’t cry, but Russ felt strong as she relaxed into him. She needed him, and he hadn’t been needed by a woman in a very long time.
After a few minutes, he said, “Maybe we shouldn’t keep Kelly waiting.”
“She’s fine,” Janelle said, but she stepped back. “She’s turning into a teenager already.” She sighed in that frustrated way Russ had heard before. “I miss my little girl already.” She threaded her fingers through Russ’s and they walked toward the front steps.
Russ had never been inside the house, and it was obvious Janelle had spent at least part of today cleaning up. The air held the scent of pine needles and the sterile crispness of air freshener. All the pillows on the couch matched and were perfectly placed. There were no shoes, no backpacks, and no jackets in sight.
“This is a beautiful house,” he said, glancing around the open concept. A hallway led out of the living room to his left, back to bedrooms and bathrooms, he assumed. The dining room sat in the back right corner, with the kitchen beside it. Kelly sat at the bar, and she looked up from the book in front of her.
She didn’t smile, but she did slide off the barstool and come toward them. “Good afternoon, Russ,” she said, almost formally. Almost like she’d been coached.
Russ cleared his throat and glanced at the girl’s mother. “Afternoon, Kelly.”
“Russ!”
He turned toward the little girl barreling down the hallway toward him, barely catching her as she launched herself at him. He chuckled as he swept Kadence up and into his arms.
“Hey, baby,” he said, touching one finger to her nose. “Were you good for your momma last night?”
“We watched My Little Pony and made caramel popcorn by ourselves.” She sounded so proud, and Russ set her on the ground, glancing at Kelly as he did. She was clearly too mature to be swept into a hug and far too advanced in the kitchen for mere caramel popcorn. She almost held her nose in the air, and Russ found himself wanting to connect to her anyway.
“Sounds amazing,” he said. “Did you eat all the caramel popcorn?”
“Nope.” Kadence skipped into the kitchen and opened a bottom drawer in the island. “Hey, where’s the bag of popcorn?”
“Kade,” Janelle said, her voice already taki
ng on a diplomatic tone. “Kelly ate it this morning, remember?”
“It’s fine,” Russ said, but he saw the daggered look form on Kadence’s face.
“Mom said I could,” Kelly said.
“I was savin’ that for Russ,” Kadence said.
“It’s saving,” Kelly said. “There’s a G on the end of the word.” She stalked away from Russ and Janelle, who wore a weary look on her face. “And we’re making peanut butter bars today, so there will be plenty of treats.” She closed her book and looked at Russ. “Can we start?”
He didn’t need to give his permission, but Kelly wasn’t looking at her mom. Janelle turned and got out a giant jar of peanut butter. “Kadence gets to measure everything today.”
“Momma,” Kelly whined.
“Or we can skip it entirely.” Janelle gave Kelly a pointed look. “And you haven’t washed your hands. You can’t mix if you don’t wash up first.”
“I did wash.”
“Let me smell your hands.”
Kelly’s fists balled up, and she marched around the island to the sink. “Fine, I’ll wash up.”
Russ could’ve cut the tension with a knife, and he didn’t know where his place was in all of it. Janelle motioned for him to come into the kitchen, but it almost felt like he’d be entering a war zone. He did it, though, and he glanced at the book Kelly had been reading.
“I have this one,” he said, a blip of happiness filling his heart. “It’s got some amazing recipes in it. What have you tried?”
“Nothing yet,” Kelly said from the sink. “Daddy just bought it for me last night.”
“Oh.” Russ picked up the book and leafed through it. “The peach tarts are awesome. The triple chocolate chip cookies. We’ve had those. I tried the baked potato chowder, but my momma’s corn chowder recipe is better, and it has potatoes in it too, so…”
Kelly returned to his side. “Will you mark the ones you’ve tried?”
“Sure.” He smiled down at her. “I didn’t know you cooked too. I thought y’all were into baking.”
“She’s branching out,” Janelle said at the same time Kelly said, “I’m trying new things.” They looked at each other, and Russ could practically feel the awkwardness in the kitchen dissipate.