by S. J. Black
“This,” she motioned between them, moving the blanket over to the side, scooting out of the bed. Her muscles screamed at her sudden movements. “Fuck,” she winced.
“Stop moving,” he growled, walking to the side of her bed. He attempted to hold her still, but she batted him away, sharp and vicious. “Zara, stop moving.”
“Stop telling me what to do.” She pushed her hand out to him, signalling her warning stance. She watched as he sighed in exasperation, putting his hands up in surrender.
Not that she could trust a Baron.
Breathing heavily, she mentally counted to three before walking on her own, wincing at how tired her muscles were. Thankfully, her feet were healed. She could walk. No major injuries. Heidi was right.
“And where the fuck are you going? Hm?” Jasper clenched his jaw.
“Away from you,” she muttered.
His hand shot out to grab her arm, holding it tightly and firmly. She whipped her head around.
“Take your hands off me,” she snarled. Zara pushed at him to no avail. “You can’t keep dragging me around like some rag doll!”
“And you can’t keep running away!” He exclaimed. His eyes were livid, brimming with an emotion that looked something like anger, but an intensity that wanted something from her.
What was it?
It looked...familiar.
His glare dropped to her mouth. A moment of weakness.
Hunger.
Her eyes faltered, shaking in her battle stance. “Look...can you just -”
“Go?”
They locked their eyes. A spark of electricity. A wave of heaviness that kept hitting her chest.
Why couldn’t she look away?
“What are you doing?” She breathed.
Jasper licked his lips, studying her forlorn expression.
“I don’t really know anymore,” he murmured softly, his silver eyes watched the way her lips parted in hesitation. He leaned in closer, testing her resolve, pushing until he felt it reach its limit. Her breath hitched. It was getting harder to hide.
“Jasper,” she whispered in warning, her eyes watching his face as it moved closer, closer to where she felt lodged in her position, anchored to the floor.
Had his lips always looked this...full?
No, Zara, wake up.
“I need you to answer a question,” he rasped, ignoring her. His breath tickled her skin, electrifying her senses. “One question, but I don’t want a lie.”
“If I play your game,” she murmured, wriggling out his grip to no avail. “Then what do I get out of it? Everything seems to benefit you at the moment.”
“If you answer my question with a yes,” his eyes drifted around the skim of her cheekbones, following the line to her collarbone, incinerating her skin with his stares. I’ll let you have what you want,” he tilted his head.
“That’s a dangerous offer, you sure you’re not afraid of what I’m going to demand?” She raised her eyebrow.
“I’m sure,” his eyes flashed to hers. She breathed heavily, willing her heart to stop beating like a fast car, completely and utterly out of control.
“I want you to leave me alone; to stop everything, to take back your stupid pledge. I don’t want to be the social pariah because you declared it so. Got it?” She clenched her jaw. She meant business and nothing else.
His face split into a devious grin, marveling at her shrewd tactics. “A Baron’s promise is a promise.”
She snorted. “A promise that’s about as reliable as the weather.”
“But you must do something for me.” He leaned in closer until they were inches apart, a proximity that shut down her defences, making her helpless to the onslaught of Jasper’s presence. “Answer yes to my question first.”
“Just ask your question so we can get this over with,” she raised her head defiantly.
Jasper inhaled deeply, considering her for a moment. Every second that passed filled Zara with dread and a strange anticipation.
“If I kissed you,” he rasped, tracing the pads of his warm fingers over her lips. “Right here...would you kiss me back?”
Colour drained from Zara’s face.
“Fuck. You.” She said blankly, tugging herself out of his hold.
To her surprise, he let her go, allowing her to take a few wobbly steps backwards. She gave him the darkest death stare she could muster. “You need help. Seriously.”
He gave out a light exhale, pursing his lips. “That’s what I thought. Trust me, no-one is more shocked than I am.”
“What? That you want to kiss me?”
“Yes,” he nodded. “That and other things.”
She exhaled a shaky breath. Words failed her at this very moment. She waited for his retraction, some sort of derisive chuckle to show that this was a sick prank, another ruse to pull from under the rug, something to twist at her again.
But there was nothing of the sort.
He kept looking at her with an assured aura that frightened her. He wasn’t joking.
“Don’t worry,” he bowed his head, a light trace of a soft, empty smile resting on his chiseled face. “I don’t need your answer right now. I can wait.”
“You can wait for eternity because guess what? I don’t like you - at all,” she grit her teeth.
“Maybe, maybe not,” he murmured, looking up at her. “I’’m not sure I quite believe you. Call it a hunch.”
“What -”
“But I like you. So what do you suppose we do about that, Zara?”
“We?” Her breath hitched in her throat.
His admission couldn’t be real. It made no fucking sense.
“Get some rest,” he said suddenly, clicking his tongue.
He moved towards the exit, stopping slowly as he reached the door. His fingers strummed against the wooden surface; contemplating, plotting. Without looking back, he tilted his head her way, mulling over his next words. “This won’t be the end of it.”
“End of what?” She muttered dumbly.
“This conversation,” he closed his eyes briefly before turning away. “I won’t let you run away from me.”
“You won’t even give me a chance,” she grit her teeth. “You seem to do what you like with little regard for what I want.”
“Yes,” he murmured solemnly. “But I don’t think I know how to stop. I would apologise, but I wouldn’t be truly authentic to my feelings. I like you and I won’t let you shut this down before it has begun.”
“There is nothing between us!” She exclaimed, blushing furiously.
“I don’t believe you,” he raised his eyebrow, turning to leave.
Damn him.
There he went, stealing the last word of their conversation.
Chapter Eight
The very next day, Zara felt no pain in her leg or foot to hinder her studies. Her tutors had emailed her in advance, allowing her to attend classes when she felt better. There was no rush to return. And in another world, she would have been grateful for the break.
Lord knows she needed one after last week.
Yet, she felt restless.
Being stuck in her dormitory room and to wander aimlessly in the Newton common room was simply a bore. Most of the students were hanging around the dining hall or out in the fields with their friends, while she hid in her room.
Zara knew that she was hiding away. From him.
Jasper had seeped into her brain, tormenting her sense of peace. His words rang in her head like a haunted ringing bell, reminding her of his promise, of his future conversations.
Where had his feelings come from?
It must be a horrid practical joke he was playing on her. Ever since the first day they had met, he regarded her with nothing but contempt, looking down on her existence and her rank - or lack thereof, in his eyes - and went out of his way to make her Barcourt experience nothing but misery.
She rubbed her face, walking down the steps of the Newton tower, heading into the main building. Her hand
s twitched restlessly. She didn’t know where she was going, but a change of scenery was exactly the remedy.
Heading up the grand stairs, she could see the entrance for the Leviathan common room. The resting ground for the Barons. A lions’ den.
She glanced at her watch. It was nearly twelve.
In theory, they should have been in class. But a sneaky feeling in her gut told her they were there.
Swallowing her pride, she headed down the hallway, towards the Leviathan entrance. Opening the creaky, wooden door, she sauntered into the expansive, archaic common room, noting that there were four people sitting idly by the windows, lounging on the armchairs.
They hadn’t noticed her walking in, but she knew who they were.
James. Tristan. Theo.
And Annie.
Since when did she miss class?
James stretched his arms - one of which was wrapped behind Annie’s back - looking to the side before his confused eyes latched onto Zara’s form.
“Zara?” James said.
Theo’s head turned almost instantly, taking in her hesitant figure in the room. Tristan glanced at her nonchalantly, his blank, unassuming gaze looking right through her. Annie’s eyes’ widened slightly but her expression was soft; more welcoming than her boyfriend’s.
“You’re looking for Jasper?” Tristan blurted out.
Zara faltered, surprised that he was addressing her. She didn’t even know why she came here. A part of her was expecting Jasper, lounging around with a smug, Cheshire chat expression. But he wasn’t here.
Now she had to come up with an answer.
“Not quite. I’m here to see Theo.”
Oh. Great. That was the best she could come up with?
She could practically see Theo’s eyebrows shoot up to his forehead. His face lightened with a satisfied smirk, getting up from the chair. He winked playfully at Zara as he strutted closer. She rolled her eyes.
James frowned. “What are you guys doing?”
“What does it look like? I’m talking to him,” she gave James a defensive look. “Mind your business.”
“Come on, love,” Theo wrapped his arm around Zara.
She slapped his arm away, sending him a warning look. “Don’t even think about it.”
“This is fucked up, Theo,” James said ominously, his eyes directed to Theo. “And you know it.”
Zara turned to Theo’s brooding expression as he considered James’ words, not appreciating the implication one bit. “I’m not doing anything, James. She’s my friend.”
James’ eyebrow quipped. “Yeah? And Jasper is our friend.”
She couldn’t believe her ears.
Moving closer to where James and Annie were seated, Zara leaned forward. “Listen, dickface; Theo is his own person, and he can talk to whoever he likes. And second,” her voice hardened with a colder cadence. “I’m not a piece of property that has Jasper’s name etched on my backside. It might work for Annie, but it doesn’t fly with me.”
Tristan released a shocked snort, muffling his chuckle behind his hand. A sick part of her relished in the way Annie flushed several shades of red while James looked like he wanted to explode.
“Excuse me?” James growled.
“Um…” Zara blinked. The words just sort of came out...she didn’t really think. “That was supposed to remain in my head.”
“What I would give to hear your thoughts,” Tristan muttered in amusement, laughing.
The others stared at Tristan, surprised by his rare display of...well, an emotion other than blank boredom. Zara contorted her features in confusion.
“Thanks?” She retreated. “I guess.”
“What do you want with Theo?” James gave a serious stare. Annie rested her hand on James’ chest as a placating gesture.
“James, leave them alone.”
God, Zara wanted to barf.
James faltered slightly, relaxing his stiffened posture. Theo came forward, motioning with his head to the exit.
“Shall we?” Theo chuckled.
Zara turned swiftly, moving to the exit with Theo in tow. James released an annoyed sigh, muttering something under his breath.
“Don’t blame me if this ends in fireworks!” James bellowed.
“Oh, get stuffed!” Zara retorted loudly, putting her middle finger up.
Once they were in the hallway, Zara exhaled deeply, running her hands through her hair. She could feel Theo walking with a smug smile.
“And just what are you smiling about?” Zara noted.
“I felt special you called me,” he teased. “It’s okay, admit it if you have a little crush on me. Most girls do.”
“Ugh,” she recoiled. “You’re full of yourself, aren’t you?”
“It’s a joke!”
“I’m sure.”
“So I’m sure you didn’t call me because you wanted the pleasure of my company or to insult me; so what is it, my friend?”
“I don’t really know,” she muttered.
Theo’s brows furrowed, his hands in his pockets. “You don’t know?”
“I mean,” she sighed. “I’m ostracised by ninety percent of the school - including the dinner staff, by the way - and I’ve been bandaged up because you and your friends tried to terrorise me - I say ‘tried’ because it wasn’t successful,” she growled, giving him a pointed stare. “Got it?”
Theo smirked, nodding. “Got it.”
“And now? Now your stupid, psychopathic friend just showed up the other day, telling me he -”
Zara stopped herself. How could she explain it?
Hi, Theo,
Your psycho of a friend confessed that he likes me. A lot.
And he will pursue me from here on out.
Oh, he also practically blackmailed me for a kiss.
Okay, thanks! See you in Music! Hope you've done the Econ homework xoxo
Yours sincerely,
Zara xxx
It wasn’t something she wanted to speak into existence. But judging from Theo’s stare, her poker face was doing a pretty shit job at the moment.
“What’s wrong?” He said seriously.
“If I said nothing, would you believe me?”
“I think you know the answer to that," he scoffed.
She crossed her arms. “Well, you know when you left yesterday? When Jasper came in?”
“Yeah,” he trailed. The way she was leading the story on was probably doing a number on his imagination.
“It’s not like that,” she said quickly. “He did nothing, if that’s what you’re wondering.”
“I wasn’t but thank you for that lovely moment of panic.”
“He said he liked me,” she declared. Her eyes followed Theo’s expression, studying for any trace of laughter or amusement. She figured that Theo would be easier to crack if this was a game.
He frowned. “He said...he liked you?”
“Yes,” she nodded firmly.
“Are you sure?”
“Pretty sure.”
“Are you -”
“I’m certain, Theo,” she said quickly. “Trust me, I wish I could make this up. Look, if this is some sort of sick joke you guys are playing on me -"
Theo shook his head in disbelief. “I know nothing about this.”
“You better not lie to me,” she raised her eyebrows. “I know you were there that night I got hurt.”
A flash of guilt weakened his features. He looked down sheepishly. “I was there, you’re right. I shouldn’t have been there, I should have left you alone - I was wrong, okay? But this? This stuff with Jasper is none of our doing.”
“Do you promise?” Zara said earnestly.
“I promise,” he nodded seriously. “You have my word.”
A moment of silence passed. Theo cleared his throat, prompting Zara to look up.
He smiled sheepishly. “I’ll admit I’m a little jealous.”
“Excuse me?”
“I think you’re charming, I’m not going to li
e,” he shrugged with a smile. “Give me a couple more weeks and I’d probably have asked you out too.”
“He didn’t ask me out,” Zara said blankly.
What what what what what what
God, Zara, why are you saying that?
“It doesn’t matter,” he sighed loudly. “He obviously likes you.”
“I’m sorry, did you hear anything I just said?” She retorted. “Your psycho friend - Jasper!”
“Yeah, but he’s still my friend,” he pursed his lips. “And he likes you. I can’t get involved with that.”
She let out a shocked exhale, shaking her head. "Well, rest assured - I didn’t ask you to!”
He smiled softly. “My loss.”
Mumbling under her breath, she strode away from where Theo stood, but he simply followed her.
“You’re not annoyed with me, are you?”
“Of course I am!” she exclaimed. “I told you what your friend told me, and your answer is that you’re only envious that you didn’t get there first?”
“And?” He laughed.
“And!” She repeated in annoyance.
He continued laughing, effortlessly keeping up with her strides. He softly held her arm, prompting her to a stop. “Wait, wait,” he smirked.
“What?” She growled.
“You’re adorable when you’re angry,” he grinned. “And you’re angry a lot.”
“Oh, sod off!” She pushed him away lightly, marching down the hall. Lucky for her, he didn’t follow her.
She couldn’t believe him.
It was a mistake going down there.
Zara walked down the corridor, round and round, until she felt her legs silently scream at her to stop. She checked her watch.
Twelve thirty.
She should have just slept in. This morning had been pointless. With no other option, she retreated to her dormitory. A conversation with her dad was long overdue.
∞∞∞
“Baba, I’m fine,” she said insistently.
“So you say but you don’t answer my calls, ignore my texts - but you’re admitted to the hospital because of an injury! Excuse a father for worrying about his youngest daughter!” A gruff voice replied.
“I’ve just been a little busy, that’s all, and it wasn’t a hospital exactly,” Zara winced, hoping that he couldn’t sense the lie behind her voice.