Olivia’s phone buzzed in my fingers and I turned the screen over, reading the text preview as it flashed on the screen.
The text sounded remarkably like the one I’d told her we needed to talk. The number wasn’t mine, though, obviously. She didn’t have a name assigned to the number, either, which meant it was the first time she’d gotten one from this texter.
I narrowed my eyes. Who did she need to talk with? It didn’t make sense. I needed to talk to her. We had things to discuss and an attraction to figure out. We needed to decide if we were going to be together or not and if she didn’t want to be, I deserved a chance to convince her otherwise.
Losing her wasn’t an option. Losing her to my brother would be worse than hell.
I had to assume that the number on Olivia’s phone was Jaxon’s. I had to go with that assumption since she wasn’t sure which twin I’d been the night before at the strip club and she’d acted like she had.
I would be stupid to assume he wasn’t a threat. The best way to beat your opponent was to over-estimate them. If I assumed she was as attracted to Jaxon as she was to me, I had a helluva job ahead of me. What if she was more attracted to him than me?
That worried me. It had been six years since I’d really had a chance to spend time with my brother. Growing up he’d been quietly charming, friendly, hard-working, and reliable. He was the better of the two of us. I had no doubt about that. He was the one that made sense for anyone to choose over me. That just raised my insecurity in the situation around Olivia.
I’d worked for all that time to be the better option. I was dressed better, had better grades in higher classes than you could get at ESA, drove a nicer car, had the better house, lived with the better parent – everything. I had everything better than he did.
When it came right down to it, I knew none of that mattered. None of it. Because when we stood across from each other on the driveway at Donnie’s house, the better brother had climbed into an old El Camino and driven away while the shittier brother had watched.
Things hadn’t changed. He’d stood there with his shoulders back and his head high and I hadn’t intimidated him at all.
And that infuriated me.
How dare he make me jealous of who he was or what he had. He had nothing. He was nothing. But deep down in my heart, I knew that wasn’t true. He was my brother. Even after everything we’d gone through, everything we’d fought over, I still loved him.
I think that pissed me off the most.
I pocketed Olivia’s phone. She wouldn’t be replying to Jaxon’s request any more than she had replied to mine. If Jaxon was after something more with Olivia, then he’d discovered just how extraordinary she was. I couldn’t even pinpoint what exactly it was about her.
I moved from the living room to the hall, pausing by the office door and listening for any evidence of my dad’s presence.
A low murmuring told me he was inside. I knocked with my knuckle, politely tucking my hands behind my back and standing as I’d been taught. My father was very wrapped up in propriety. As long as I did as expected, there was nothing he wouldn’t give me. If I failed him or disappointed him with my actions, his silence would be all-consuming for quite a while.
The last time I’d walked in on him with the Ms. Ramirez, he hadn’t been amused and I’d been on the rough end of his reproach for a day or two.
After fifteen seconds the door opened, revealing my dad in an impeccably tailored suit and a well-tied tie. He tapped the Bluetooth device in his ear and motioned me in.
“Well, Harold, I think it’s important that this deal go through. I’ll patch you into my assistant. She’s also my consultant. I suggest you watch your tone, got it?” He disconnected and motioned me toward the chair across from his at the large captain-style desk on the far side of the expensively appointed office. “Hello, Braddox. What brings you here?”
I sat with my back straight in the wing-backed chair, not relaxing into the cushions. My father hated laziness or sloppiness. I couldn’t afford to be either right then. “I was in the hall and I noticed Ms. Ramirez here. Again.”
She’d been in the hall the night before, just sitting at the top of the stairs and staring toward the front door. I wasn’t sure if she’d been lost or what. Maybe my dad and her had broken things off and she couldn’t bring herself to leave or something. I wasn’t sure what had happened.
He offered me a side-smile. “Yes, she’s turning into more than you’d promised. I hadn’t had a chance to know her when she was married. This was a… good opportunity. Thank you for suggesting it.” He smiled at me more directly and adjusted a calendar on his desktop.
“What exactly is going on? I saw her this morning… at like three… in the hallway.” I arched my eyebrow with the question, trying to add a level of teasing to my question without taking away the seriousness of the matter.
Dad’s bright smile dimmed with doubt. He folded his hands on the mahogany desktop and leaned forward, furrowing his brow. “Do you think it’s too soon? I still love your mother. I just… I’ve been seeing Maria a lot – here when we’re working and then outside of a working dynamic and she’s amazing. She’s smart and beautiful and she’s intoxicating.” He pressed his lips shut as if he’d said too much.
Intoxicating must run in the family. That was exactly what I would say about Olivia.
I shook my head, resting my ankle on my opposite knee. “I don’t think it’s too soon at all, Dad. I mean…” I glanced down and then back up, forcing myself to be vulnerable and real with my father when I usually worked my hardest to be condescending and dry. “The truth is Mom left. She chose her addiction over us. That’s her fault. Not yours. I’m surprised you didn’t move on before now. Don’t put the brakes on this thing because you’re worried about me. It’s been six years.” I shrugged. I didn’t want to say too much, but I also didn’t want to hold back.
He nodded, studying me and then glancing back at his desk. “Part of me always hoped your mom would change her mind.” His words were soft, as if he didn’t want to say it, but he had to get the thought out there into the ether.
I set my jaw. “It’s too late for that.” It was too late for any of it. It was time to move on like Mom and Jaxon didn’t exist. Like the only competition worth having was with myself.
Dad nodded, his gaze staying downcast and I knew he was thinking about his other son, the one he hadn’t seen in so long, the one who looked exactly like me.
Another knock from the doorway made Dad hold up a finger. “Just a second, Braddox.” He stood and opened the door.
A woman’s soft voice murmured to him and then he turned back to me, his cheeks flushed. “I’ll be right back, Brax. You can stay if you’d like. I’m heading out of town tonight, but I’d like to pursue this conversation a little bit further, if you have a few moments.”
I nodded and he smiled before ducking out of the office.
Glancing around, I stood from the chair, preferring the relaxed way I stood over the stuck-up-assed way I sat.
Rolling my shoulders, I moved around Dad’s desk. He’d once asked me if I was interested in taking over responsibility in the business he’d started with computer software development and taken it to new heights. I’d turned him down. Working for my dad and then taking over his company wasn’t something I wanted for my future.
His telephone rested on the desk. He’d left it there since he had his Bluetooth device connected.
The screen lit up with a call coming in. J.O.C. filled the center of the screen and I narrowed my eyes at the number under the name Dad had assigned it on the caller id.
Jaxon’s number. The same number I’d seen on Olivia’s phone.
My brother was encroaching on my life with Dad, my girl, and my social life. What exactly did he need to understand to stay away from me?
I swiped the screen of my dad’s phone and searched his messages. J.O.C. had his own thread.
The beginning of the current thread was from three
weeks ago and it ran hundreds and hundreds of messages with abbreviations I didn’t understand. Dad had replied almost as quickly as he’d been messaged.
Dad had never answered one of my texts faster than thirty minutes. I’d always accepted it, thinking he was too busy and would get to me when he had time.
The evidence of his availability for Jaxon left me feeling bitter. Whatever Jaxon was doing, he was wrapping Dad around his finger and I didn’t know how to fight back.
What if Jaxon was trying to usurp me from the life I’d been able to stay in?
Was it my fault he’d gone with Mom? He could have fought it, stayed with Dad and me. He didn’t have to go with her. Unless he had. The guilt trip I’d given him about leaving her alone had been conducted just so. I was a master of manipulation and Jaxon had been taken in.
I wasn’t sure I felt bad for getting what I wanted. Wasn’t our world survival of the fittest? That’s what I was living and that’s how I felt.
I just needed to figure a way to get Jaxon out of my way. I didn’t need to go back to seeing him every time I turned around. I loved him, but when I saw him… I saw myself.
And I didn’t love myself as much I wished I did.
Chapter 16
Olivia
“Are you seriously heading back to school?” Stephanie munched on a graham cracker slowly, eating the corner and nibbling as she went.
“Are you feeling any better?” I had woken to the sound of her throwing up in her private bathroom. Her heaving reached me in the adjoining bedroom and I rubbed my eyes as I slid the door between my room and the bathroom.
She’d been huddled next to the toilet with her hair hanging in her face. I stepped in, pulling her hair back and twisting a rubber band around the sloppy knot at the base of her neck.
I called the cook to send up some crackers and milk. Something in her stomach would help her feel better. I hoped.
We sat together on the edge of her bed as she ate her makeshift breakfast. She ducked her head to see me better. “You didn’t answer my question.”
“I know.” I smiled but shook my head. “I… Yeah, I need to go. I’ll grab the bus and get in there.” I wasn’t sure I wanted to make the crossover from the west side to the east at seven in the morning.
“I’ll give you a ride. I should probably go do something today. I’m sure the counselors are going to be contacting my parents.” She rolled her eyes and sipped her cold milk. “Not that they would notice.” Her self-deprecating laugh didn’t ward me off.
I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. “Look, it’s okay. I don’t mind taking the bus. You might just need to stay here and rest.” I had no idea what it took to grow a baby, but Stephanie was doing it. I was more than a little in awe.
She shook her head while I studied her. Holding up my hand, I grinned. “I’ll take the ride, but you don’t need to go to school, if you don’t want. I wish I had my phone.” I sighed.
The stupid phone was going to be my undoing. I had no money to replace it and no way to get a car to get me around town to where I needed to be.
I might have felt poor at the apartments with no food, but with my independence shut down, I’d never felt more like a kid than I did reliant on other people.
“I’ll take you. I really want some pancakes from Denny’s. You know, the fluffy ones.” She winked as she stood and pulled on a long, thin sweater over her pajama pants and t-shirt. She untwisted her hair and repulled it all together and then secured it again. “There, I’m ready to go.” She winked and moved to wait by the door.
“Sounds good.” I’d splashed my face while waiting for Stephanie to gather her strength on the side of the massive tub.
I reached up, plaiting my hair into a thick French braid down my back and finished buttoning up the shirt Stephanie let me borrow from her extra closet in the attached bedroom.
We walked down the hall together, making our way to her car. I slid into the seat beside her and glanced over as she started the engine. “I hope you don’t get sick of me. I’m not sure how long this will go on.”
She grinned at me. “Well, I’m just going to pretend you’re sharing in the excitement of a new baby. You can be my support system. The trade-off will be good.”
I grinned and squeezed her shoulder. “Friends don’t need to trade for support, but I’m here anyway.”
For a split second, the humor faded from her eyes. “Thanks. I appreciate that.”
We held our eye contact for a moment longer and then she shifted into drive and pulled around the loop driveway and onto the road.
Seeing her mailbox reminded me of what I’d seen. “Isn’t it weird that the people who bought my house haven’t changed the mailbox name? It looks like they made it permanent or something.” I tapped my fingers on the windowsill, idly curious about the people who’d moved in, but not worried about it. There was something different about the situation, but I wasn’t emotionally invested enough to care.
“Yeah, the family that is there is a single mom and daughter. Their last name is Stabler which I thought was weird, too. But coincidences, you know?” She shrugged and we finished the few minute drive in silence.
She pulled in front of the school and I climbed out. With only a few minutes until class started, the front lawn teemed with other students eyeing her BMW with a mixture of jealousy and awe.
Well, I’d already been labeled the Rich Bitch. I might as well deserve the name.
I wiggled my fingers at Stephanie and closed the door, striding toward the front office to sign myself in and report the reason for my absence.
The same woman with the nametag reading Stubel met me with an icy smile. “Well, Ms. Ramirez, it’s nice to see you’re gracing us with your presence. Your mother left you a message.” She slid the memo across the counter, her drawn in eyebrows reaching high toward her hair line.
I grabbed the memo and ignored the woman. Some people couldn’t go through their day without trying to assert their power over others. I got it, but I didn’t have to like it.
I moved out of the office, careful not to meet anyone’s eyes as I walked down the hallway toward my first class. I could feel people looking at me and I didn’t care. I plastered a cocky smile on my lips and lengthened my stride. I wasn’t there to make friends. I had to graduate and if I wanted to graduate, I needed to have my attendance in place.
There was no point in being bitter about my situation. My dad was gone. Fine. Time to move on and accomplish my goals and dreams, in part in memory of my father. He would want me to do my best in my life – whether he was there or not.
A note from my mom. She’d made the first attempt to reach out. Did she have any idea that I hadn’t been at school yesterday?
A small ribbon of guilt spread across my confidence. She could have been worried about me and had no way to check on me. If she was still my mom that way. Okay, that wasn’t fair.
I ducked into the girls’ bathroom on the way to class and into a stall, shutting and locking the door before giving any attention to the note.
Mom had gone through a ton of changes when Dad died. It wasn’t fair to think she would stop caring about me. I just didn’t know why she would be at the O’Donnells’ house so late at night. I’d avoided thinking about it directly. I hadn’t even told Stephanie why I wanted to stay with her. She’d just welcomed me, probably because she was always alone at her home.
The paper crinkled in the silence of the otherwise empty bathroom. I bent my head to see it better.
The scrawling script of whoever had taken the message made it difficult to read, but I could almost hear my mom’s frustration.
Answer your phone or texts. I’ll be out of town until next week. Stay at apartment. We’ll talk when I get back.
She’d be gone? Probably with Braddox’s dad. What was she doing for him that was paying the bills? What was happening between them that she was at his house until all hours and she’d failed to tell me what was happening?
S
he’d been widowed only a few months before. Was that enough time? On behalf of my dad, I couldn’t help feeling betrayed. She’d moved on that fast?
Maybe she hadn’t understood that I really did see her acting like a whore. If she was, fine. I mean, own it. We all did things we had to do. I didn’t even want to bring up the stripping night that I couldn’t completely remember.
If she just owned what she was doing, I’d have more respect for her and her actions.
I crumpled the note up, squeezing my fingers so hard my nails bit into the soft flesh of my palms.
Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to relax my hands and exhale on a whoosh. Unlocking the stall door, I tossed the memo into the garbage can set up in the corner and continued my route to class. I’d taken a few minutes longer than I should have.
I opened the door and walked into the room a solid five minutes after the bell.
Tossing an apologetic smile at the teacher, I slid into the first empty seat in front.
I stared at the front of the class, unseeing as the teacher moved in front of the board and talked about things I just didn’t care about.
I didn’t have to turn around to know Jaxon watched me. His gaze seared into the back of my neck and I could feel the heat spreading through my body.
Every class I had I would have to deal with him. Every class.
I took a deep breath. I could do this. It wasn’t that big of a deal. I could do it. He didn’t have to know that I’d danced or stripped for Braddox and made out with him.
He didn’t have to know that I’d fantasized about both of them as Braddox had touched my naked breast.
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. Memories of what he’d done to me returned and left me breathless. I struggled to focus on the teacher’s lesson. Anything to get the images that were slowly coming back to me out of my head.
When the end of the class got near, I watched the second hand on the clock face, counting down the time until the bell rang. Before it had completely started ringing, I slid from my seat and darted from class.
Forsaken: A bully romance (An Academy Twin Rivalry Series Book 1) Page 14