My managers at 3 Arts Entertainment: Molly Madden, who from the start encouraged me to write my story. She believed in me long before this was ever a memoir. Richard Abate, for taking me to breakfast that morning and making this all possible. Annie Gaspar, Martha Stevens, Desirae Stevens, Kristen O’Leary, and Rachel Kim—I appreciate your commitment. Special thanks to my editor, Suzanne O’Neill, at Grand Central, who treated this book like her own and gave me the confidence I needed to share it with the world. To Jacqueline Young, Ben Sevier, Staci Burt, Alana Spendley, Abby Reilly, Sarah Congdon, Carolyn Kurek, Lisa Cahn, Mark Steven Long, Chris Nolan, and the many others who played a part in bringing this to life, I am grateful for you. My lawyer, Tom Hunter, has been there for me through it all. His advice, knowledge, and friendship have been invaluable to me. Nicki Fioravante at Viewpoint showed me kindness, compassion, and generosity before she even knew me—thank you for going on this journey with me. Gayle Spitz, for giving me a safe place to grieve and heal during this process.
Sebastian Stan and Tyler Winther, for reading this in its many forms over the years and having an unwavering belief in me. Ali Kay, one of my best friends and biggest supporters, who even had to loan me a computer when mine crashed while writing this. To my friends who offered advice and lent me a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen, I couldn’t have done this without you. It takes a village—thank you to all of those who were part of this one.
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About the Author
Elizabeth Gilpin is an actress, writer, and producer. She starred in and produced Life Boat, a short film directed by Lorraine Nicholson, which premiered at the 2017 Tribeca Film Festival. The film was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize for Live Action Short Film at AFI Fest and won the Audience Award at the Napa Valley Film Festival. Elizabeth also starred in Endings, Inc. and Guerra. Stolen is her first book.
Elizabeth currently splits her time between Los Angeles and Nashville.
Reading Group Guide
Discussion Questions
What were you like as a teenager? Did you also struggle with your mental health or did you know anyone who did? What do you think would have been a more effective method to address Elizabeth’s sadness and anger?
Elizabeth realizes many of her counselors had completed the wilderness program themselves. What does that say about its lasting effects and the lies these teens might have used to protect themselves both during the experience and in its aftermath?
Why did Elizabeth feel she needed to lie about her experiences? How does that speak to the efficacy of the methods employed by her counselors?
Somehow, Elizabeth remains hopeful through much of her time in the woods. She looks forward to reconnecting with her old friends and returning to the sports she once loved. What are some memories, coping mechanisms, et cetera, that you would use to keep going in these difficult circumstances?
Elizabeth learns a powerful lesson from Viktor Frankl’s book Man’s Search for Meaning, one she carries with her for the remainder of her time in the woods. What book has similarly bolstered you?
How do you think the wilderness program affected Elizabeth and, once at Carlbrook, how do you think it affected the female students Elizabeth called “Ponies”? What do you think this says about society’s expectations of young women?
We see multiple examples throughout the book, especially at Carlbrook, of people like Maya who tried to buy into this system. Do you think they tried to convince themselves that this was a positive experience to survive, or do you think they truly believed it was for the best and it would lead to positive change after graduation? What would you do if you were put into this type of situation?
What do you think drove Randall to found Carlbrook? Do you think he really believed he built a better alternative to the behavioral school he attended as a child?
Adjusting back to the world was difficult for Elizabeth and her fellow students. In what ways did Carlbrook condition them—such as encouraging them to approach everything in such a confrontational style—in ways that left them ill-equipped to deal with conflict in the real world? Similarly, how do you think the traumas she experienced at Carlbrook shaped Elizabeth’s daily activities and the world she returned to in the years after she left the school?
Do you think these schools prey on scared and frustrated parents? How are the parents also victims of this system? Given the prevalence of these behavioral programs, why do you think it has taken so long for the true horrors of these experiences to come to light?
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