I wrote this book from my heart and soul.
I wrote it for me.
I hid nothing of myself in writing it.
It is for every autistic person who hasn’t ever seen themselves in
fiction.
This book is also for every queer, or every mixed-race,
or kinky person,
who hasn’t seen
themselves.
Now, maybe, you can.
Many thanks to my Critique Partners Jamie Zakian, K.J. Harrowick and Jason Beymer for their help with working out the issues of this book. Justin? You made the fight scenes much better.
I need to, as always, thank my Developmental Editor, Jaga and my team of most awesomest ever Beta-readers, The Hellacious Bookwyrms. Dacia, Matt, Rebecca, Kiersten, Meg, Tricia & Sherri.
Antonio? I might not have let it out without the kick in the ass, thank you for that. I’m a melodramatic shit, I know it. Thank you for loving it in me.
Thanks as always to my husband, Kieru, and our children for giving me the time, space, and encouragement to do this writing thing. It means the world.
When I wrote this book, it was a very new thing for me. A new genre, new format, a new experience of everything I’d never let myself do or feel in my writing. I didn’t think I could do it. Thank you to EVERYONE along the path of its birth that did anything to help me believe I really could. I can’t name you all, it would take several pages, but know that I remember you so very fondly for helping me become who I am.
An Author.
A note on structure.
This is a full book, some fifty chapters, it will be released in segments of around thirteen chapters each. There will be five volumes. As soon as they are all available to the public, they will be combined into a collection. If you send me a receipt of purchase for the single volumes, I will send you the whole book as one epub. Send proof of purchase to [email protected].
The reason I have to structure it this way is length restrictions on createspace. This is a very long book, each of the books in the trilogy is. So, alternative structures needed to be explored. You can also become a patron and get the books there.
There is a full appendix at the back of the book which is about nine pages long, it is also available on my website.
It is the first book in a trilogy, and as much as I love this world, there will likely be many, many more stories in it.
This book contains Own Voices representation of autism, bi/pansexuality, lifestyle kink, and being non-binary.
TRIGGER AND CONTENT WARNINGS FOR THE FOLLOWING
Extremely rough sex with willing participants
Self-Harm
Infertility Struggles
Suicidal Ideation
Depression
Anxiety
PTSD/C-PTSD
Gory hand to hand combat
Sex trafficking/trade
Indentured service/slavery (from an author of historically oppressed peoples)
Fertility as a necessary construct to planetary growth
These are ownvoices representations of everything except the final three. These are *my* experiences with these issues and not meant to express the experiences of *all* who have known them.
If you have an ED… this may not be the book for you because I do talk about food quite a lot. It’s part of how I ground the scenes in the five senses, but please be aware that food is mentioned frequently. No EDs are displayed or depicted in detail, but I’m aware that the mention of food can bother quite a few people.
ILAVANI is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are the products of the author's imagination or a used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead is entirely coincidental.
Copyright 2017 by Kaelan Rhywiol
All rights reserved.
Published internationally by Multifarious Kinked, an imprint of Multifarious Press LLC, London, Ontario.
First Edition; Volume 2
Series: Ilavanian Dreams
ISBN: Print
ASIN: eBook
SUBJECTS: Science Fiction Romance/ BISAC Fiction/Romance/Science Fiction Fiction/Fantasy/Romance
GSAFD: Fantasy Fiction/Love stories
Multifariouspress.com
Cover Images: Adobe Photo Stock
Cover Art: Kaelan Rhywiol
Editing: Kaelan Rhywiol
ILAVANI
Volume 5
Kaelan Rhywiol
Memoir of Alexander Righ, Ruler of Erieria—Excerpt
If my son doesn't make a move on Kataniya soon, I'm going to have to blow my plans out of the water, give her to him and tell him what she is, which will cause problems of its own. Stubborn, has there ever been a more stubborn child than Maëlcolm? Kataniya has passed every test I've set her. She had the last set of multiples removed yesterday. She could be the answer to our problems although, she'd probably put Maël on the throne. At least one of my sons would save the family. Use of the elixir will extend my life, but at this rate, I'll be dead and burnt before Maël gets off his ass, and either decides he loves the girl or not. By the Twins! Wait… yes, I do know of two other people as stubborn as Maël, me and Cameron. Against my will, Cam has told me he's taken Li back into his bed. It's not that I don't understand, but by all the Gods it's frustrating. How can being a parent be so blessedly hard?
CHAPTER 41
7th of Sunani, Summer
26:30 hours, Dusk
MAЁL
Maël paced his quarters, more nervous than he'd ever been in his entire life. He slicked his hands up and down the fine wool of his pants repeatedly whenever he stopped walking. He'd beaten Cam back to the stables by a slight margin, the laughter and camaraderie of their race reminding them both of their shared childhood. Maël had dismounted and when Cam had stepped away from his horse Maël had hugged him tightly. He'd come back to his suite and supervised the replacement of his mirror, showered and then arranged a meeting here in his chambers with Kat.
As he waited and fretted, Maël kept second guessing himself. What if she couldn't deal with the restrictions being with him would mean? What if she no longer wanted him? What if she was in love with Los—a distinct possibility.
Maël knew Los's allure, and they’d been spending time together. What if she couldn't understand why Los and Maël couldn't be together? What if she'd never felt the way he did for her? Bieito’s cruel words at the festival came back to haunt him. Maël had wanted to go to her but decided—since he wanted privacy for whatever would happen—to ask her to come here. When she knocked, his heart raced and climbed into his throat.
KAT
Kat swallowed when Maël answered his door. He stood there shirtless in elegant black slacks and bare feet. Behind the fullness of her skirt she flicked her ring fingernail against the pad of her thumb. When he stepped back to hold the door open for her, she swallowed and looked down. Unable to speak she stepped inside the warmly lit room that smelled so intoxicatingly of him. Los had gone to serve a client and she’d been alone when he called. She'd been surprised when he'd summoned her but hadn't questioned it, just prepared herself as for a client an
d come to him. She'd do almost anything for him.
He shut the door quietly behind her. “Will you sit? Would you like a drink?”
She closed her eyes at the way his voice caressed her. Like he'd petted her fur with that dark, resonant bass. Shivering in reaction, she nodded, went to the sitting area and sat down. A bold orange cat stropped himself across her ankles, and Kat couldn't help but smile and reach down to pet the long, creamsicle colored fur.
Maël brought her a glass of water and sat down on the sectional couch. Kat looked up at him as the cat left, concerned at how worn Maël looked. Several days growth of reddish beard dusted his usually clean-shaven face. He had dark circles under his beautiful eyes and his gaze fell intent upon her.
He braced his elbows on his knees and looked her up and down. She noticed some faint bruising on the back of one hand and wondered what had happened.
“How have you been?”
“Well enough, I suppose,” Kat whispered. She lifted her glass and sipped—not able to meet his eyes—hoping to ease the dryness in her throat. When she put it down, her hand shook.
“Are you happy, Kataniya?”
She flicked her gaze up to him. He watched her so closely, but she didn't know how to answer.
“I… Kat paused and looked searchingly at him, wondering if she could expose her truth. Risking her soul, she murmured, “No, I'm miserable.” She cast her eyes down to her hands and bit her lip. Under her skirt she repeatedly rubbed the top of her toes with the other foot, hoping to calm herself. “Do you wish me to serve you, Master?” She swallowed hard, not understanding what he needed from her.
Kat squeaked, eyes widening in surprise when Maël suddenly went to his knees and pressed close to her legs.
He looked up at her with his heart in his eyes. “I want so much more than sex with you. Nothing holds any joy for me without you. I'm a bloody disaster without you but I can't… Twins… fuck… I can't offer you enough.”
Kat reared back against the couch. She nested her hands together, rubbing thumb pads over nails as she tried to cope. Gods, how she wanted him! She bit her lip, hard, grasped her right thumb tightly in the other hand and sucked a breath. She couldn't, no matter how much she wanted… but… tears burned the edges of her lids. She blew out a breath and her heart came alive and grew wings. Kat hesitantly lifted a trembling hand to touch his face. She struggled for words, stuttering. “W-wha-what are you saying, Maël?”
“I want you here. With me, love. I don't know how we'll work out all the issues, and there’re so many it's mind boggling, but I need you near me daily. I want…” He drew back, and she'd never seen him so hesitant, so vulnerable. He cast his eyes down and ground out. “I want everything with you.” Maël's voice broke, tear-stricken copper-shot eyes regarded her. “I… I love you, Kat, and I've no right to ask it of you but will you? Can you be with me? In whatever fashion we can manage?”
Kat's heart stuttered, her breath caught and then her blood sang as she slid off the couch to her knees in front of him and wrapped herself around him, burying her face in his throat. “Yes, Yes, Yes! I don't care what the problems are.” She remembered all Los had shared with her regarding his feelings for this man and his invitation to leave with him. Oh, Gods, Los! “We'll work around them.” I’ll figure it out somehow, it has to work between the three of us, it has to. She pulled back to look up into his eyes and said in a choked whisper, “I love you, too. I'm a broken mess without you. So yes, no matter what, yes.”
Joy flared in his eyes and lifted his lips in a grin as he surged to his feet. Arms wrapped tightly around her waist Maël took her with him and twirled her around his chambers. Their laughter intertwined as he let her body slide down his. He set her down on her feet, met her eyes and hesitantly, reverently, took her face in his hands. Lowering his head, he kissed her so gently, lovingly. He sipped at her lips as if she were the most precious drink in the world. He kissed her again and again, before teasing her lower lip with his tongue.
“Open for me, my sweet Kat,” He whispered between drugging kisses. “Let me inside.” He slid his hand up along the cable of her loosely braided hair to cradle her head. Kat met his kiss almost frantically. Maël slid his tongue into her mouth, over Kat's own and she gently sucked.
Claiming her desire, she pulled him closer and crushed her aching breasts against his chest. Moaning deep in her throat at the taste of him, Kat luxuriated in the touch of his hands, the heat of his skin, in simply being with him.
Maël had rarely wanted someone as badly as he needed her. Kat's arms wound around his neck, and he thrilled at the dichotomy between her soft skin and softer fur. The way her tall, curvaceous body fit perfectly into his arms made his chest ache. The scent of her skin and arousal… he needed to taste her.
She purred low in her throat and pushed her hips against his, letting him know how much she wanted, needed. Maël groaned when he gently disengaged from her. He relished the look in her passion widened, cat-slit pupils as she looked up at him.
“A minute.” He growled low in his chest at the interruption. He went to lock both doors, the ones leading to the halls and the ones leading to his seraglio. Maël stopped next to his desk, sent Cam and his assistant a quick message each that he'd be out of touch—barring emergency—until morning, and turned off his phone. He paced back to where she stood, looking out the windows of his suite, the light from the lamps gilding her fur.
Grateful he wasn't wearing a shirt, Maël padded up behind her. Kat stood only a few inches shorter than he and he enjoyed her solidly built body as he moved to brush her back with his front. His heart lifted when she immediately pressed back against him, solidifying the contact.
Maël slid his palms around her hips and up over the sensitive flesh of her belly, under the thin top and cupped her heavy breasts. He repressed the wince from his sore hand and reveled in the silkiness of her skin. Her throat vibrated with purring as she let her head fall to the side against his shoulder. Arching her back she gave him all the access he wanted. His sensitive fingers circled her nipples, he smiled as they hardened for him. Maël turned her and in the same motion pulled her shirt over her head. He drew her close, glorying in the press of her naked breasts against his chest, she gasped at the sensation.
“Kat, I want you so badly,” Maël whispered. He pressed his erection against her hips, showing her how hard he was inside his slacks.
She smiled, a grin and a flash of fangs in that exotic cat-like face and her nimble fingers went to work on his buttons. “Then have me, Maël. I ache to feel you in me again.”
Losing most of his vaunted self-control Maël let his passion free and drove her against the wall behind her with a thump. He hooked his fingers in the waist of her skirt and peeled it quickly down her long, smooth fleshed thighs. As Kat lifted first one foot free, then the other, he tossed the frothing mess of cloth aside and did what he'd been longing to do every day for ilaweeks. He spread her thighs and buried his face in her cleft; thrilling to the burn of her tiny claws in his scalp as she cried out in pleased surprise. The pricking of her claws, her flavor and the way she smelled all assured him that she was real, that she was here. Gently, Maël licked her silky folds, softly teasing her clitoris, luxuriating in her spicy flavor. He buried his face deeper in her as he lifted her legs off the ground, easily supporting her weight with his hands despite his bruises.
Maël took a long, loving lick and enjoyed Kat's gasp of delight. He did it again and again, ending each stroke with a little flick of his tongue against her clit. When her breath panted in her lungs, and her hips moved, seeking ease, he sucked her hooded flesh into his mouth—careful of his fangs—and hummed against her, making her come. As Kat's bucking and cries eased off, leaving her boneless in his arms, he let her melt down the wall onto his lap. He greedily kissed her mouth, and she fed at his, needy, her
hands at the sides of his face to hold him close. He guided her to wrap her legs around him and then stood up; carrying them to his bed, he toppled them over onto it.
Maël laughed with Kat's soft chuckles at the soft landing. Her dexterous fingers were through his buttons now, and he groaned as her softly furred fingers took his cock into her hands. He growled in need as she stroked him, base to tip.
“Please,” she whispered. “I ache for you.” She let go and lay back, naked and gorgeous against the pale gold of his silk sheets. “Come into me,” she whispered. She spread her thighs wide and ran her hands from her hips up over her belly to cup her breasts, holding them up as an offering to him. Her furred thumbs caressed her hard nipples.
“Maël, please.”
The sound of his name from her lips broke his control, and he ripped his pants off before kneeling before her. “You are so beautiful.” He braced an arm next to her head, and she rubbed his forearm with her face, marking him.
Maël slid the head of his cock over her swollen entrance and watched her face as he slid slowly into the saturated heat of her. She pressed her head back into the pillow, her gorgeous eyes wide and locked on his as she came around him in hard pulses. He groaned and started to move, pleasing them both with a hard, strong pace that slammed his headboard against the wall. Kat grasped his shoulders and as she came again cried out and sank her delicate nails into his flesh, drawing blood. That last bit of sweet, burning pleasure threw Maël over the brink, and he thrust faster and faster into her pliant, giving heat until he came in an explosive rush that had him roaring out his pleasure and almost crying with the joy of it and of her.
His breathing harsh with exertion and emotion Maël gently laid down on Kat's chest, and she wrapped herself everywhere around him. Her arms around his back, long, supple legs around his waist, driving his still hard cock deeper into her and her tail around his left leg.
“Can't talk,” she whispered. She purred frantically as she held him tight.
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