Then with a flip of her wrist, she waved aside everyone else in the room, slipped her arm around Lila’s waist, and marched them right out the door.
“Thank you,” Lila said after they were out of earshot.
“I’m proud of you and who you’ve become,” Mimi said. “I’ll do whatever I can to help, which brings me to the next item at hand. Do you want to tell Cobie her song isn’t going to be a top-forty hit or should I?”
Lila stopped short. “How did you know?”
“Because that song clearly wasn’t you talking to her, so I figured it had to be the other way around.”
Lila nodded. “I couldn’t sing her words every night.”
“Good,” Mimi said resolutely. “I would’ve thought less of you if you did, but you still haven’t told me what you intend to do now.”
“I don’t know,” Lila said honestly. “I hadn’t thought anything through yet.”
“Well, I’m not telling you what to do with your business, but maybe you should start thinking faster, because Cobie and Talia have requested a meeting with Addie Hammels’s legal representatives for Friday afternoon.”
“What? Why?”
“Apparently, they want her on the design team for Vigilant.”
“She remembered.” For the first time in weeks, the little twinge in her chest didn’t stem from sadness. Even with everything else that had happened between them, even when Cobie had got what she wanted, even with the awful way she’d left things between them, she’d not only remembered Addie, she was making good on her promises to Lila.
She covered her face with her hands. Cobie was still coming through for her. How could she have ever believed Selena over someone who had proven herself to be her polar opposite.
“What do you want to do about the meeting?” Felipe asked.
“I don’t know,” Lila said, suddenly unsure of herself once more. She couldn’t just assume Cobie would take her back. She was clearly out of Lila’s league in so many ways. What if Cobie realized that now? What if she was still mad? What if she didn’t want to see her? What if she had already moved on? Just because Lila had come around to realizing the error of her ways didn’t mean Cobie agreed with her. And Lila had barely survived the first rejection, even when she’d had work to fall behind. “Just give me some time to think about it, okay?”
Mimi’s smile vanished, and Felipe and Malik shared one of their judgy, exasperated looks, but no one said anything to stop her. Once again, she was clearly on her own.
Chapter Fifteen
“Ladies, let me introduce Addie Hammels,” Stan said, as he ushered a young woman into the conference room. “Addie, this is Cobie Galloway and Talia Stamos.”
“Uh, yeah they are,” Addie said in a teenager tone that made Cobie smile.
She extended her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Ms. Hammels.”
“Um, I’m just Addie right now. My last name is, uh, in transition.”
The comment made Cobie’s chest ache, and she and Talia exchanged a look. “I understand you’re in the process of emancipating yourself from your parents?”
“She is. That’s why I’m representing her today,” a woman said, entering the room clad in a business suit and carrying a manila folder. “Addie is in charge of all negotiations, but she’ll run all legalities and contract terms through our office. Shall we get down to business?”
Cobie looked behind her to Stan and then to the door. “Are we expecting anyone else?”
“No, I guess not,” he said as if the news disappointed him. She knew the feeling. It had hovered over her for weeks and had only amplified when she had returned to the city. She had hoped that by requesting this meeting a week early, she might have gotten a response from Lila. When no call or message had come, she let herself hold out some hope that she might just show up. With those hopes dashed, Cobie struggled not to look too downtrodden.
Thankfully, Addie kept things moving by turning to Talia and saying, “I really like Vigilant. Like, I read it three times during chemo.”
Talia smiled broadly and exclaimed, “You’re hired!”
“Hired for what?” Addie asked, looking around the room. “I thought you just wanted to use the one drawing.”
“Actually,” Cobie said, “we’re looking to assemble a team of artists to do some pre-production artwork for the film. Things like more outfits, some concepts for Vale’s apartment, a sketch of secondary characters for us to send out to agents before auditions.”
“And you want me?” She motioned up and down her own lanky form. “Even after you’ve seen who I am?”
Cobie sat forward. “Who are you, Addie?”
“I’m just . . .” She shook her head. “I’m just a kid, a bald, punky, lesbian teenager. I can’t be what you came in here looking for.”
Talia opened a folder and pulled out a few sketches she’d printed from Addie’s website. “Are you the woman who drew these?”
Addie’s eyes grew wide as she surveyed her work. She raised her hands to the dark stubble starting to grow unevenly along her scalp. Then she laughed, a loud shot of humor-laced disbelief.
The sound rolled over Cobie like a hot shower in the dead of winter, and she felt a part of her heart fall back into place.
“I’m going to take that as a yes,” Talia said, her own voice light with amusement.
“Yeah,” Addie finally said.
“Then I think a bald, punky, lesbian teenager is exactly what we’re looking for on this project,” Cobie said, quickly adding, “It’s not going to be a cake-walk. You’ll answer to a creative director who likely won’t care that you’re young. You’ll have to work fast and withstand critique. And there’s no guarantee anything you do will end up in the final version of the film. It’s a long hard process.”
“Holy shit, is this really happening?” Addie asked. Catching herself, she said, “Sorry, I mean yes. I can handle criticism. There’s nothing a director could say to me that would be worse than— never mind. I mean, thank you.”
“It’s okay,” Cobie said softly. “It’s a lot to process on the spot, but you’re right, nothing that will happen during the production will be worse than what you’ve experienced in other areas of your life. You have my word.”
Addie’s eyes narrowed. “Are you doing this just because Ms. Wilder told you about me? I didn’t ask her to. I didn’t even ask her to visit me at the hospital. She just did. You don’t have to give me something just because of her.”
“No,” Cobie said quickly. “The truth is until a week ago, I didn’t know anything other than your name. I’m sorry for that. I should’ve found you sooner. I should’ve done my research sooner. I let my own biases and assumptions get in the way of doing my job, and I’m here now because your drawings speak for themselves.”
“But Ms. Wilder was your . . . or is . . .”
“Ms. Wilder is not here,” Cobie finished for her, hoping she didn’t sound as heartsick as she felt about that fact. “I can have some contracts drawn up for your attorney to look over, but you’ll get paid scale for your work, the same as any other artist on the team, and you didn’t hear this from me, but if you also asked for a hefty bonus on any piece that makes the final film, I would see to it no one balks.”
Addie looked to her lawyer for the first time all meeting. The woman nodded, and the corner of her hardline mouth might have even twitched upward for a second.
“Yeah, that’d be lit,” Addie said. “I mean, thank you, Ms. Galloway, Ms. Stamos.”
“Please, we’re going to be working together a lot. Call me Cobie.” Then she fished a card from her pocket and slid it across the table. “And that’s my personal number. If there’s anything I can do for you in the meantime, in any way, please don’t hesitate.”
“Wow.”
Talia scratched her number on the back of one of the drawing printouts and pushed it Addie’s way. “There’s mine too.”
“Double wow.” Addie grabbed both phone numbers and clutched
them tightly to her chest. “I went from having, like, only two numbers in my phone to doubling that with two famous people. And, I mean, I didn’t even used to like your movies.” As soon as the words left her mouth, she raced to cover it with both her hands and her pale face flushed fire-engine red.
Cobie and Talia both roared with laughter.
“I think we’re going to get along famously,” Talia said.
“I’m so sorry,” Addie said to Cobie.
“Don’t be,” Cobie said. “If we’re being honest, I haven’t really liked my movies for a long time either, but we’re going to work together to make sure we’re all proud of Vigilant.”
“Yes, of course. Thank you,” Addie said, standing as her lawyer did. “I appreciate this so much. I won’t let you down.”
Cobie walked around the table to meet her at the door. “I know. And I promise not to let you down either.”
“Would it be totally horrible and uncool if I hugged you?”
Cobie smiled. “Maybe, but I’d really like it anyway. I promise not to tell if you don’t.”
Addie wrapped her long skinny arms around her neck, but it was Cobie who squeezed tighter and longer. The connection was good for her soul, more healing than all the time she’d spent in the mountains and more strengthening than any of the exercises she’d spent months doing.
“Okay, now go celebrate,” Cobie said as she stood back. “Maybe your lawyer should take you somewhere fancy for lunch and bill the hours to Stan.”
“Go ahead,” Stan said when the lawyer looked over her shoulder. “It’s on me, but be sure to ask if Mimi wants to join you. She’s already called dibs on managing your career, something about girl-power and sisterhood.”
“Thanks, Stan,” Cobie said after Addie had left. “I appreciate your backing me with the studio about her.”
“It’s no problem. When they heard she did your costume, they didn’t really put up much of a fight, but even if they had, your name carries a lot more weight than it used to.”
Talia punched her on the shoulder. “Big shot.”
“Are you suggesting I should turn into a more demanding diva?”
Stan smiled his big toothy grin. “Not with your manager of course, but if you wanted to do some more things like you just did there, it wouldn’t be a bad thing.”
Cobie nodded thoughtfully. She hadn’t done enough of that sort of thing over her career. Perhaps doing her own thing and keeping to herself wasn’t always the best answer. It sure hadn’t been nearly as rewarding as seeing the exuberance on Addie’s face. If getting into the game a little more meant more moments like those, she’d add it to the long list of life choices that needed to be reevaluated. “Point taken.”
“Good.” He clasped her on the shoulder. “Then I look forward to seeing more of you.”
She wouldn’t go quite that far, but her priorities clearly needed some rearranging as she went forward with the Vigilant project. This movie had to be different on so many levels. She couldn’t just accept what she had come to consider the status quo, not for the work, not for the people she worked with, and not for herself.
She and Talia headed down the hall in silence until Talia suddenly stopped and gave her arm a squeeze. “Cobe, I really love that kid.”
She nodded. “She’s good.”
“She’s fantastic. She’s talented and polite, but she’s also kind of irreverent. She’s not pretending to be someone she’s not. She’s not trying to sell anyone. And did you see her body, all wiry and scarred? She’s been to hell and back.”
“Yeah,” Cobie agreed, a sense of protectiveness swelling in her. She didn’t add that the kid would probably still be in hell if not for Lila.
“And she confirmed the no-parent thing and the queer status. What’s wrong with people? What kind of parents abandon their kid? I sort of want to adopt her now.”
“That’s a good idea,” Cobie said.
“Really?” Talia asked. “She’s getting emancipated, so I was just kidding, but maybe she would like to stay with me instead of alone? Is that weird to ask?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, okay, then I won’t, but wait a second.” She punched Cobie’s arm. “Are you even listening to me?”
“What?”
“That’s what I thought.” Talia rolled her eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” Cobie said, though the more appropriate answer might have been “everything.” She had her movie deal and all the people she wanted on the cast and crew. Her manager told her she could ask for more, and she had just used her new star powers for good. She should be walking on air, but even her happiness felt off-kilter right now. She couldn’t quite put her finger on why, or maybe she just didn’t want to, because if she tried to find the source of her discontent, she’d be forced to admit nothing had felt right since her fight with Lila. Something about the moment hadn’t just upset her, it had altered her core. No emotion had been clear or pure since that morning, and she suspected none would be until she went back and righted the wrong.
“Hey.” Talia raised a hand in front of her face. “You’re kind of scaring me. Come on, spill.”
“I just thought maybe Lila would be at that meeting.”
“I know, but—”
“I know you don’t like her, but you don’t really know her. I’m not even sure I really know her, and maybe that’s because she didn’t let me, or maybe it’s because I didn’t let me, but the fact of the matter is, I misjudged her.”
Talia’s eyes widened. “Cobe, she’s—”
“She’s a lot of things, I know. She’s calculating and manipulative, but she’s also smart and talented. She might be a bit of a fame hog at times, but she’s also clearly capable of doing things under the radar too, things you and I never thought her capable of.”
“Right, and she’s also—”
“She’s also made some mistakes and some poor choices, but so have I. Why do I get let off the hook for that when she has to pay? Basing an entire relationship on a lie isn’t a good idea. But not everything between us was for show. Those moments when we were alone, when she had nothing to gain and still chose to give, those were real. And maybe they didn’t mean the same thing to her that they did to me, but they meant something.”
“Good, but—”
“It’s really unfair to expect her to make compromises to her career and her life and her future without acknowledging that I need to make some changes too. I can’t keep expecting this life to give me back anything I’m not willing to share. Lila gets that. She understands what it means to be part of something bigger, and I don’t need to agree with all the ways she goes about that to understand she’s always got her reasons. She’s a role model to kids like Addie. What have I been to them?”
“Cobe, you have to stop right now.”
“No. I’m just getting started. And maybe she doesn’t want me. Maybe I’m going to have to live with that, but I’m not going back to being the person I was before. I want better. From her, and more importantly, from myself. I have to go to her house.”
“You can’t,” Talia said firmly.
“I have to try to set things right,” Cobie said passionately. “I have to go—”
Talia bopped the palm of her hand on Cobie’s forehead and held it there, then leaning really close, said, “You cannot go to Lila’s house right now because Lila is not home.”
“What?”
Talia used her hand to physically turn Cobie’s head toward another long hallway. “She’s right behind you.”
Cobie blinked a few times, but she still had a hard time clearing the rush of thoughts from her mind enough to process what she saw. There in the middle of the hallway stood Lila in a little sundress as red as her lips. Cobie’s mouth went dry at the sight of her, a subtle sign that not all her reasons for desiring this meeting were altruistic.
“Yeah,” Talia said as she finally released her. “Now that I see her in person, I sort of get why you let her get away wi
th the things you did. Good luck with that going forward.”
Then she did a little skip-jog back in the other direction, leaving the two of them alone.
Cobie sighed, and Lila smiled a slow, nervous grin. Cobie took a step, then Lila did the same until step-by-step they found themselves standing close enough to touch. This was their moment, the one she had waited and wished for. And as they closed the distance between them, she still had no idea what she intended to do with the opportunity. Should she open with an apology? Maybe she could beg for forgiveness for all the awful things she had thought and said, or try to open up with something lighter? One thing was clear, she should say something. Something smart, something charming, something heartfelt and true. I miss you, I’m sorry, I love you. All were valid options, and she had yet to settle on one when she parted her lips and Lila met them with a kiss.
• • •
The kiss was sweet and sad and powerful enough to zap any residual doubt right out of Lila’s chest, but what it left in its place was something more powerful. Regret, remorse, the acute awareness that they were right and everything else was painfully wrong.
She wanted to drink from Cobie’s lips as if she’d spent their entire separation lost in a desert, parched and alone, but she knew she had no rights to that well.
Pulling away slowly, she felt bolstered by the little whimper of protest that escaped Cobie’s mouth.
“What was that for?” Cobie asked as she regained enough of her breath to speak.
“For everything you said to Talia, for everything you did for Addie, for everything you did for me that I never thanked you for and,” she smiled shyly, “because I love you.”
“I’m sorry, you what?”
Lila’s face flamed. It wasn’t quite the response she’d hoped for, but she couldn’t take the words back any more than she could make them untrue. “Yeah, well, you don’t have to say it, or feel it, or even acknowledge I said it, but I did it because I do. Love you.”
Cobie looked around to see several people frozen at the other end of the hallway. “Oh, right. Is there a camera on?”
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