“What can I say? I’m a growing fellow.”
“You’ll be growing sideways.”
“Not a chance. I work too hard.”
“You work your jaws more than your muscles.”
“Ha ha! I’m glad to see you haven’t lost your wit, even if you are so down in the mouth.”
“I’m not down in the mouth.” The lamplight cast shadows across Tobias’ face, but Rosanna could still see the quirk of his eyebrow before he forked an enormous bite of pie into his mouth. “I’m merely pensive.”
“Did you learn a new word today?”
“Now look who’s being funny. Don’t you know the meaning of ‘pensive’?”
“Of course I do. You must be having some mighty sobering thoughts.”
“I’m tired and have been trying to comfort a fussy boppli.”
“I don’t think that’s all there is to it.”
“I don’t know why you say that.” Rosanna prepared to hoist herself and Mollie from the chair. “I’ll leave you to your smidgen of pie.”
Tobias reached out and grasped Rosanna’s wrist. “Wait. Please.”
“My, such manners.”
“Talk to me, Rosanna.”
“About what? Would you like me to tell you a bedtime story?”
Tobias’ fork halted halfway to his mouth. “Tell me the story of why you didn’t want to stay at the singing and why Paul Hertzler took you home.”
Rosanna gulped. She knew this would happen. She should have escaped earlier. How many times was she going to have to repeat her explanation? She tried to pull her arm free, but Tobias’ grip tightened. “I’m tired, and there’s nothing to tell.”
“Tell me anyway.”
“You already know. Paul went back into the barn to tell you. Very simply put, I wanted to go home and check on Mollie. I was waiting in the cold for you. Paul discovered me and offered to drop me off at home. That’s it in a nutshell.”
“Do they all live happily ever after?”
“What?”
“Don’t bedtime stories end with everyone living happily ever after?”
“I don’t know. My story ended happily. I arrived home safely to take care of Mollie. Did your own story end happily ever after?” Rosanna needed to get the focus off herself before Tobias tried to dig deeper.
“What story?”
“The story of Tobias and Emma. Does it have a happy ending?”
“I don’t know that story.”
“I think you do. I saw the two of you stealing glances at each other. It looked to me like you were drifting toward each other as I slipped out the door.”
“Emma and I talked. But I talked to a lot of people.” He shoveled another bite of pie into his mouth.
“Did you talk to a lot of other girls?”
Tobias shrugged and chewed. “You know me. I talk to everybody.”
“Swallow before you talk.”
He gulped. “You asked me a question, so I answered.”
Rosanna sighed. “Are you interested in Emma?”
“Are you interested in Paul?”
“Paul is a freind.”
“Emma is a freind.”
“I saw you staring at her, Tobias. And I saw her staring back. You can’t fool me.”
“I saw Paul looking at you, too.”
“You couldn’t have. Your gaze was totally focused in a different direction.”
Tobias wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
“We do have napkins, you know.”
“True, but they’re in the kitchen. I’m in here.”
Rosanna rolled her eyes. “I just want to tell you I think it would be wunderbaar if you and Emma, uh, get together.”
“Don’t go planning a wedding or anything.”
“It might be kind of fun.”
“Then plan your own.”
“I don’t have any intentions of getting married.”
“Why not? You’re pretty nice and decent enough to look at.”
Rosanna nearly choked. “You certainly have a way with words, Bruder. I hope you didn’t say anything like that to Emma.”
“I didn’t say anything bad.”
“Decent-looking? What girl wants to hear she’s decent-looking?”
“Should I have said I am blinded by your beauty, and you are the most magnificent creature ever put on earth?”
“That’s better. Emma wouldn’t object to that.”
“We’ll never know about that, will we, since I don’t have any intention of saying those words to her or anyone else.”
“Don’t you want to get married?”
“When you do.”
“You’re older than I am.”
“Oooh! By a whole two years.” Tobias licked a finger, pressed it to the plate to pick up pie crumbs, and popped it into his mouth.
Rosanna reached over to slap his hand away from his face. “Seriously, Tobias, you do plan to get married, don’t you?”
“Sure, but not tomorrow.”
“I didn’t think you were planning to get married tomorrow. I do think Emma would be perfect for you, though.”
“It’s such a relief to have your approval.” He slapped a hand across his chest and heaved an exaggerated sigh of relief.
“I’m trying to be serious.”
“Then seriously think of yourself. Paul is a great guy. He’d be just right for you. From what I hear, he sure seems taken with Mollie. You ought to give him a chance.”
“What do you hear?” Rosanna’s heart skipped a beat. Had people been talking about her and Paul? Why?
“It’s a known fact that he brought you home after Becky’s twins were born. He was at the right place at the right time after the singing. And Mamm said he always asks about Mollie and seems interested in her—and probably you, too.”
“Mamm? Have you been talking to her about me?”
“I asked her if you got home okay and if she knew what happened. She told me Paul wanted to see Mollie and then you two had a snack in the kitchen. She said you seemed to get along well.”
“Why wouldn’t we? As you said, I’m pretty nice. Paul and I are only freinden. Remember that. I told Mamm the same thing. I’m grateful he showed up at the right place and time after the singing. I could have turned into a lump of ice waiting for you.”
“You could have stayed inside. If you were waiting for me and figured I’d be a while, you could have visited with some of the others instead of running out to hide in the buggy—an open buggy, mind you, on a cold night.”
“I wasn’t hiding.” Rosanna lowered her voice even more. “Not exactly.”
“If you say so. Why did you run out, Rosanna?”
“Ach, Tobias! I didn’t seem to fit in. Nobody else there was a parent, so I felt like I didn’t belong. But I’m single, so I don’t really belong with the young married women, either.” She was too embarrassed to tell her bruder how the sight of Frannie and Henry leaving together had pierced her heart and brought tears to her eyes.
Tobias scooted to the edge of his chair and set the empty pie pan on the floor. He gently patted Mollie before squeezing Rosanna’s arm. “You fit in everywhere. We’re all different and have different things to offer people. Sure, the other girls at the singing don’t have kinner, but they are still your freinden. They still care about you. They probably look up to you for taking on the responsibility of raising an infant. They’d probably like hearing about her. The other young mudders could probably be a help and support for you. They know what you’re going through with the sleepless nights and teething. Give people a chance.”
Rosanna stared at her bruder. She’d never heard such a serious speech from him before. “Maybe,” she whispered.
“The point is, dear Schweschder, you are the same Rosanna inside whether you have one boppli or ten or none. You are still you. You don’t have to believe you are a misfit and hide from people. We care about you and Mollie.”
Rosanna remained silent for a moment as the words
sank in. “You make a lot of sense for a bu.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“It was meant as one.”
“And as for Henry and Frannie . . .”
“Never mind about them.”
“If you say so. He wasn’t the right fellow for you anyway. But that doesn’t mean the right one isn’t out there. Maybe someone you haven’t considered before. Maybe someone right under your nose. Maybe Paul Hertzler.”
“I get your point, but I’m not anxious to make another mistake or make a fool of myself again.”
“You did neither. This is the time we’re supposed to get to know people and figure out what’s right for us before we make a commitment that will last our whole lives.”
“When did you get so smart? Emma would be very fortunate to have you.”
“Hey!”
“Hey, yourself. Help me out of this chair so we can go to bed.”
“That sounds like the best idea I’ve heard in a while. My stomach is happy now, so I can probably sleep. We do need our energy. We never know what tomorrow will bring, ain’t so?”
“Life is full of surprises, for sure and for certain.”
Chapter Eighteen
Just before Christmas and Mollie’s six-month birthday, two stubborn teeth finally erupted through her gums, returning her to her sweet-natured disposition.
“I sure hope her other teeth aren’t as difficult.” Rosanna carried a smiling Mollie into the kitchen, where Sarah had already begun breakfast preparations. “Just look at these two beautiful teeth.” She tickled the little girl until she broke into a wide smile.
Sarah pushed the skillet of bubbling eggs off the heat to focus her attention on the boppli. “Well, lookee there! She does have two teeth. The first ones are usually the toughest.”
“You’d think you two never saw teeth before.” Tobias stomped into the kitchen from the mudroom.
“Mollie has never had teeth before. Just look, Tobias. Aren’t they the prettiest teeth ever?” Rosanna held the infant out for her bruder’s inspection.
“Teeth are teeth. When is breakfast going to be ready?”
“Ach, Tobias, you always think with your stomach. Here, Mollie, your onkle will hold you while I help get breakfast on the table.” Rosanna thrust the little girl into Tobias’ arms. “We certainly don’t want this poor fellow to waste away to nothing.”
“Not a chance of that happening,” Sarah mumbled. “Either he or Joseph slipped into the kitchen for a midnight snack last night and ate all the applesauce cake that was left.”
“How do you know it was one of us? It could just as easily been Daed or one of the others.”
“James, Katie, and Sadie don’t venture downstairs at night.” Sarah shook a finger at Tobias.
“And I didn’t do it, whatever it was.” Samuel entered the kitchen drying his hands on a towel before lifting Mollie from Tobias’ arms.
Rosanna laughed. “Daed doesn’t know what ‘it’ is, but he knows he didn’t do it.”
“Joseph, call your bruder and schweschders before you plunk down at the table, please.” Sarah waved her hand to shoo him toward the stairway.
Moments later, the three younger kinner bounded into the kitchen chattering about the upcoming Christmas program at school. The entire community attended, not just the scholars’ families, so they were very excited.
“You won’t have much longer to wait now. Christmas will be here before you know it.” Sarah used the edge of her apron to pull a pan of biscuits from the oven. “Set the table, girls, so we can eat.” She handed Sadie a wad of silverware and Katie jars of homemade apple butter and strawberry jam.
Rosanna dropped little plastic bags filled with oatmeal raisin cookies on top of ham sandwiches and apples in the lunch pails lined up on the kitchen counter. She cast a quick glance out the window over the kitchen sink. “I don’t see any pink and purple streaks of sunrise this morning.”
“It’s cloudy,” Daed remarked. “It wouldn’t surprise me if we saw snowflakes today.”
Katie, James, and Sadie cheered while Rosanna shivered. Snow could be pretty and lots of fun for the kinner to play in, but Rosanna hoped it held off until Christmas.
“Maybe we’ll get out of school early to go sledding.” Sadie’s eyes sparkled in anticipation.
“You might want to hold that thought, Sadie.” Joseph poked her with his elbow and nodded toward the window. “There isn’t a single flake falling from the sky.”
“You never know what could happen.” Sadie wrinkled her nose at her older bruder.
“Life is full of surprises. Here, Daed, I’ll take my little surprise so you can eat.” Rosanna extracted Mollie from Samuel’s arms and planted a kiss on top of her little honey-haired head.
* * *
Sadie’s wish for snow came true on the evening of the Christmas program. The clouds spit out big, fluffy flakes, and the bitter wind chomped at their noses as the Masts hurried to the buggies. Rosanna, Mollie, and Joseph climbed into Tobias’ waiting buggy, while the younger kinner hustled into the back of their parents’ buggy.
“I’m not sure if Sadie is more excited about the program or the snow.” Rosanna hugged Mollie close and pulled the buggy blanket tighter around both of them. “It’s a gut thing the ride isn’t too long.” She tried hard to keep from shivering, but lost the battle. She scooted closer to Tobias so Joseph could sit in front, too. Maybe squished between the two she could absorb some of their body heat.
“They’re bound to have the stove cranking out heat at the schoolhouse, so you’ll get warm quick.” Tobias clucked to the horse to get them rolling.
“Jah, and with all the people crammed in there, we’ll probably be sweating in a matter of minutes,” Joseph added.
“I doubt I’ll be sweating.” Rosanna’s teeth chattered. “I hope Mollie is warm enough.”
“You’ve got her so bundled up she can barely take a breath.” Tobias reached a hand out to touch the lump in Rosanna’s arms. “Gut. I feel her moving. She’s still alive.”
Rosanna slapped at his arm with a gloved hand. “You’re silly. She’s only a boppli, you know. I don’t want her to get chilled or to get sick.”
“Overprotective!” Joseph muttered.
Rosanna nudged him with her elbow. “That might be true, but it’s probably not any more than Mamm.”
“You’re right about that. Mamm keeps us on a short leash. I can’t wait until I can have a little more freedom.” Joseph sighed.
“One more year and you’ll be able to attend singings and activities, Bruder. I hope you aren’t planning to go wild.”
“Nee. I only want to do more things, not wrong things, just different things.”
“That’s a relief. Don’t be like your big bruder here.” Rosanna giggled.
“Hey! I behave myself.”
“I know, Tobias. I’m teasing. If Joseph turns out like you and Roman and Adam, that will be a blessing. Then Mamm and Daed will only have the three little ones to worry about.”
“And Mollie,” Tobias reminded her.
“True, but she’ll mainly be my worry.”
The two Mast buggies followed a long line of gray buggies up the lane to the Amish schoolhouse. A crowd of people, young and old, were already hurrying toward the door. The scholars’ program provided a highlight of the season for the entire community.
“What did I tell you, Rosanna? You’ll get warm in record time.” Joseph pointed at all the folks who weren’t wasting time milling about outside on such a raw evening.
“I can let you and Mollie out close to the door,” Tobias offered. “Joseph and I can park and see to the horses.”
“That would be great.”
“Say, you aren’t planning to slip out and wait in the cold buggy again tonight, are you?”
“Nee, Tobias. I only did that once, and not with Mollie.”
“You haven’t been back to any more singings, either.”
“I’ve been, uh, busy.
Besides, there have only been a couple since that time. Maybe I’ll go to the next one.”
Tobias stopped the buggy. He tossed the reins to Joseph and hopped out to help Rosanna and Mollie down.
“Danki, Tobias. See you later. Hurry so you don’t miss anything.”
“It’s too cold to dawdle. We’ll be there before the program starts.”
* * *
Tobias had been right. Once everyone gathered in the school, the temperature in the room soared. Wedged in between two other young women with infants, Rosanna gradually thawed. She pulled some of the blankets off Mollie so she wouldn’t become overheated. The women exchanged information and brief tales about their little ones’ latest accomplishments. A welcome peacefulness settled over Rosanna as she talked with the other mudders. They accepted her. They shared with her. Hope surged. Maybe she did fit in after all.
A hush fell over the room when the teacher walked to the front. She explained what the scholars had been working on over the last few weeks and pointed out various papers and pictures pinned to the walls and invited guests to examine them later. The program proceeded with songs, recitations, and the enactment of the Christmas story.
Rosanna thought Katie looked nervous, but she gave a flawless recitation. Sadie almost giggled when her turn came, but she sobered and did a fine job. James had narrated part of the Christmas story and only stumbled over one or two words. The whole program went off without a hitch and brought smiles to the faces of all who watched.
Mollie cooed a couple of times but had otherwise been silent. She happily played with the few soft toys Rosanna had brought or else watched the other bopplin in fascination. Before long she would want to play with the others and wouldn’t be content to simply stay in Rosanna’s arms. Rosanna vowed to enjoy every single day of these precious times with her little girl. One day she’d be watching Mollie stand before the community to recite her part in the Christmas program.
The program concluded with a few words by the bishop followed by a silent prayer. Then everyone could partake of the refreshments or peruse the scholars’ work on display. The school program never failed to put Rosanna in the holiday spirit. This year would be extra special since it was Mollie’s first Christmas.
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