by Elle Linder
Another reply didn’t come. Just as well. Rex obviously wasn’t in the best state of mind.
Back in the den, he zoned out in front of the TV with his glass refilled with two more fingers of Bulleit Whiskey and feeling empty inside.
Fifteen
TORI PULLED IN front of Rex’s house a little after nine-thirty. His cryptic messages worried her. Rather than go back and forth with him, she didn’t reply to his last text. If he needed her, she would be there for him. It was how she was raised. Her family never let down someone in need, especially when it was their significant other.
But leaving her house hadn’t been so easy. Dinner had been awkward, which she expected. Every time she and her father were in the same room together, tension filled the air. Glances had been shot her way from her brothers and mother. Even some of the ranch hands appeared to notice.
Rex’s text had made her phone chime while they were watching a movie. Her mom and dad both turned toward her as she typed a reply. After that, she put her phone on silent. Her parents still noticed each time she replied to Rex. Eventually, she couldn’t take it any longer and excused herself. But before she could make her escape, her dad had stopped her.
“If you’re going to him and staying at his place, I’d appreciate you telling me so now. You’re an adult—act like one,” her dad had muttered.
Tori had squared her shoulders and leveled her gaze on him. “Fine. I won’t be home tonight. See you in the morning.” She’d darted away before he could say anything.
She hopped out of her car and went to the door and softly knocked. A moment later, the door opened and the expression on Rex’s face was one of shock.
“What are you doing here?”
She threw her arms around his neck and gave him a chaste kiss. “You said you needed me.”
Rex tugged her inside. His mouth was on hers, kissing her breathless. She tasted whiskey, and that worried her. Something must have happened.
While they kissed, he removed her coat and was met with resistance from the tote bag on her shoulder. He pulled back. “What’s this?”
“I’m spending the night. Figured I’d bring the proper items this time.”
“What kind of items?” He smiled, setting the bag on the floor, then hung her coat in the closet.
“Oh, you know, nightgown, facial cleanser… condoms.”
He steeled, holding her gaze. “Condoms?”
“I wasn’t sure if you had any, and I didn’t want to be unprepared. I’m not on birth control.” She frowned. “I don’t like to be unprepared for stuff. I’m not saying we will tonight, but if we do, I didn’t want to have it ruined by neither of us having protection.”
“Well, I had bought some the other day, just in case too.” He kissed her. “Come on.”
They went into the den and she took her spot on his lap.
“What happened?”
Rex sighed, encircling his hands around her. “Raquel called.”
“Yikes.”
“Yeah. I hadn’t talked to her since Lyla’s fourth birthday.”
Tori tried to recall from the student roster when Lyla’s birthday was. “Wait, that was in July.”
“That’s right. Three months ago. She and her latest boyfriend just returned from spending a month in Europe. Finn, the boyfriend, wants to meet Lyla.” Rex growled and dropped his forehead on her shoulder.
“Wow.”
“Raquel was only calling at Finn’s request. Not because she wanted to see her daughter. We had words. She called me a hateful man. I slipped and said I’d let her know after I talked to you.”
“After you talk to me?”
He lifted his head and toucher her cheek. “Yeah, it just came out naturally. I mean, I wanted to talk to you, but telling her that was none of her business.”
“I appreciate your consideration. That’s sweet.”
Their lips met for more kissing.
“You’re in my life. You’re important to me.”
“I don’t know what to say, other than you’re important to me too.”
“Is it too early to go to bed? I want to hold you.”
She smiled. “Not too early at all. Let’s go.”
Tori stared at herself in the bathroom mirror. She wasn’t one to sleep in sexy nightgowns. There was no need for it in her parents’ home, and she didn’t have a boyfriend to impress. But she had one nighty to wear. Dana had given her a silky purple negligee on her twenty-fifth birthday to “inspire” her. Her girlfriends had all giggled, showing their approval of the sexy garment. They were relentless about trying to get her to date but she’d always have a reason why she wasn’t interested. Dana’s gift hadn’t inspired Tori at all until tonight.
Tonight was the first time she’d worn it. It showed just enough of the side of her breast to make her feel sexy, while the rest of it cascaded over her curves and stopped mid-thigh. She pulled her dark brown hair into a low ponytail and secured it with a scrunchie.
The butterflies in her stomach were going crazy, revving up her anxiousness. She wanted to take the next step with Rex. She had wanted to the night after the harvest dance but she’d said no, and Rex hadn’t pushed her. Still, he’d taken care of her, and she’d had the most explosive orgasm. It left her wanting more—more of him.
“He’s not Grant,” she whispered to herself. Inhaling a deep, nervous breath, she exited the bathroom and entered the guest bedroom.
Rex was sitting in bed, reclined against his pillow, waiting for her. His eyes widened when he took her in. “Wow,” he said through a heavy breath.
Goose bumps covered her arms.
“I should tell you, I’m not sure what I want to happen. So no expectations, okay?” She crossed her arms over her chest, tilting her head down. She hesitantly watched for his reaction. When he didn’t appear angry, she released the air she’d held in her lungs.
“I already told you, you’re in control. I’m at your mercy.” The kindness and understanding in his blue eyes relaxed her a little more. “Come here.” He patted the spot next to him. “I’m plenty happy just holding you tonight.”
His statement pleased her. Even though she wanted more than snuggling, she wasn’t sure tonight would be the night.
Tori joined him in bed, lying on her side, and stared up at him. No words were spoken for a long moment as they gazed into each other’s eyes.
Rex took her hand and played with her fingers, entwining them and kissing each one of hers.
“You’re safe with me. I’d never hurt you,” he declared out of the blue. He ran his finger across her jaw. “You never have to be afraid of me.”
She blinked, feeling emotion catch in her throat. Why was he saying this? How did he know she was afraid?
“That’s sweet of you to say. But I’m confused as to why you’re talking like this.”
Rex adjusted himself in bed, turned off the lamp on the nightstand next to him, and eased her into his arms. She laid her head on his chest and draped her arm across his stomach.
“This is nice,” she whispered.
Rex pressed his lips to her head and inhaled a deep breath. “It is.” He stroked her back and kissed her head again. “Tell me about your first sexual experience.”
Her body tensed and she closed her eyes, wishing he hadn’t asked her about her first time having sex. It wasn’t her way to lie or keep secrets, despite having done it for the past week with her parents.
“It was nothing special,” she answered in a soft voice.
“How old were you?”
“Twenty-one.”
“Was he your boyfriend?” Rex held her closer as if sensing her needs.
“No, just a guy who charmed his way into my pants.” A shudder ripped through her as that night flashed back. She should have never gone back to his dorm room with him.
Tori giggled, clutching her stomach while Grant held her close. They stumbled, both a little drunk from drinking too much tequila at the tavern across campus. Just because she
turned twenty-one during the summer before her fourth year of college didn’t mean she drank a lot. Alcohol never did it for her. Why she decided to have more than one drink tonight had everything to do with Grant Bishop, Mr. Star Defense Tackle.
“Having a hard time walking straight, babe? I got you.” Grant swooped her off her feet and carried her like a child. Compared to his massive size, she was like a doll in his arms.
She giggled some more, tossing her head back. This guy was crazy. He’d been pursuing her since the first day of classes after colliding into him at the gym. They both had been sweaty from their workout and out of breath. Tori had never considered a jock before. She preferred good ol’ country boys like her dad and brothers, but Grant was persistent. By October, he’d effectively worn her down.
She looped her arm around his neck and kissed his cheek. “My hero.”
“You know it, babe. My room or yours?”
“I have a roommate, so yours, I guess.” Grant had a room all to himself. Since she had every intention of having sex, Tori wanted privacy and not to be rushed.
“Your wish is my command.”
Tori snorted. “God, you’re cheesy.”
The flash in Grant’s eyes should have scared her, but she’d gotten looks like that from her brothers regularly. And like with her brothers, she poked the bear just to get a rise out of him.
“What? Is a big guy like you too cool to be called cheesy? How about dorky?”
Grant picked up his pace and growled. He didn’t say a word; he only huffed as he carried Tori. The rhythm of movement lulled her the remainder of the way. The tequila in her bloodstream likely helped.
She must have nodded off because she startled when tossed haphazardly onto his bed. Grant wasted no time undressing. The action shocked her, along with the size of his erection.
“Take your clothes off,” he grunted once fully naked.
“Um… Okay.”
Grant watched her with a predatory glint in his black eyes. She wasn’t sure what she’d expected, but it wasn’t this. Where was the playful foreplay she’d read about or seen in rom-coms? Didn’t men enjoy undressing a woman? Where did the tingling she felt between her thighs at the tavern disappear to?
“Lie down,” he grunted again.
Now things felt really off, but she couldn’t put her finger on what had changed. She did as Grant said nonetheless.
“On your stomach, ass in the air!” he barked. The angry element in his voice slithered down her spine.
“What? Why?” she asked, her body now shaking.
“So this goddamned cheesy, dorky jock can show you a good time!” Before her mind could process what was happening, she was on her stomach and screaming from the worst pain she’d ever felt.
“Tori… Hey, sweetheart? Where’d you go?” Rex’s comforting voice broke through the nightmare she’d just relived.
“Oh God, Rex!” she cried out and clung to him as if her life depended on it as uncontrollable sobs ripped from her throat.
“Jesus, Tori, what happened?”
She shook her head as Rex held her in his strong arms. Her body trembled and she felt sick to her stomach. It’d been a long time since she’d thought of the night she lost her virginity. Apparently, she hadn’t buried it deep enough.
Rex’s questions certainly didn’t help.
“You’re safe, Tori. I won’t let anything happen to you. No one will ever hurt you again,” he whispered. “You’re safe with me.”
His words meant the world to her, though she barely made them out as the sound of her racing heart thumped in her head. She was so undone, she couldn’t talk.
Rex held her for a while, rubbing her back in soothing circles and whispering sweet words to her.
This was the first time anyone had comforted her over what happened with Grant. She never realized how much she needed to be held and told she was safe. It might explain why she never dated and had avoided most men.
You’re safe with me were the last words she heard as sleep took her.
Rex listened to Tori’s even breathing. It’d been a couple of hours since she passed out from crying. He couldn’t sleep after watching her break down. Before waking her from her reverie, her nails had dug into his flesh, her tears dampening his chest. It had scared the shit out of Rex. If the light had been on, he probably would have seen a look of terror on her face.
He was filled with so much rage, he didn’t know how to process it. His imagination went down a dark, violent road, trying to piece together what had happened to Tori the day she lost her virginity.
Tori’s benign statement, just a guy who charmed his way into my pants, seemed off to him, and he wasn’t sure why. She’d said it without anger or disdain, as if nothing heinous had happened.
But her reaction? It was compelling as hell and said otherwise.
Again, he didn’t want to make assumptions, but if he had to guess, it would be that Tori had been sexually assaulted.
His stomach tightened at the thought.
How anyone could take from a woman was beyond him. Forcing themselves on someone as sweet and kind as Tori… He wanted to give that person excruciating pain in return.
Just how awful her first time was, Rex didn’t want to imagine.
“I’ll always be gentle with you,” he promised her right then and lightly kissed her head. His heart swelled with love and an innate need to protect her. The emotional and painful moment he’d observed had sealed it. Tori was his. She meant everything to him, and he’d never let her go.
“You’re squeezing the air out of me,” she said in a strained voice.
“Oh, baby, I’m sorry.” He relaxed his grip and tense jaw.
Tori propped herself atop his chest and kissed his lips. “It’s okay. Why are you awake?”
“Couldn’t sleep. I’m worried about you.”
“I don’t want to talk about that anymore.”
“Darlin’, we need to. I need to know what happened.”
“No, you don’t.”
“But he hurt you.”
“Please, Rex. I want to forget what happened.” She laid her head in the crook of his neck. “I want that experience wiped from my memory and replaced with one that is beautiful and loving.” She kissed his jaw. “Can you do that for me?”
Did she mean right now?
“Yes. Whenever you’re ready.”
“Good. Not now but soon, very soon.” She swirled the tips of her fingers in the hair on his chest. “Try to get some sleep. It’s late.”
“I’ll try.”
Sixteen
“DADDY! DADDY! WHERE are you?” Little feet thumped outside the door and the panicked cries of Lyla jolted Tori awake.
She jostled him, feeling panicked herself. “Rex, it’s Lyla.”
“What?”
“DADDY!” Lyle’s blood-curdling cries had Rex flying out of bed.
“Oh shit!” He ran out of the room.
Tori didn’t know what to do. She’d fallen asleep without a plan regarding Lyla. Did they let her see that Tori was there? Should she have snuck out of the house before the sun came up?
She reached for her phone and saw it was 7:23 a.m.
“It’s okay, sweetpea. I’m here. I didn’t leave you, baby. I would never leave you.”
Tori put her hand to her heart. Poor baby.
“I was just sleeping in here with Tori.” He entered the bedroom as if there was nothing strange about Tori being there. “Look, honey, there she is.”
Tori gaped, eyes wide. What was he doing?
Lyla’s little face turned toward her. It was red and streaked with tears. The sight broke Tori’s heart. She wiggled to get down. The instant Rex set her on her feet, Lyla climbed on the bed and into Tori’s arms.
“I was so scared,” she cried, snuggling as close as humanly possible to Tori. “I couldn’t find Daddy anywhere.”
Tori met Rex’s gaze as she wrapped her arms around Lyla. “Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry you were s
cared. Everything is okay now. You see, he’s right here.”
Rex joined them in bed and sandwiched Lyla between them. His hand rubbed Tori’s hip, his eyes locked on hers.
She couldn’t believe it. This scene didn’t feel awkward after all.
It felt… normal.
“Can we have pancakes for breakfast?” Lyla asked.
Tori ran her fingers through Lyla’s hair, waiting on Rex to reply.
“Absolutely. I’ll make pancakes for both my girls.” He leaned over Lyla and planted a big, loud kiss on Tori’s lips.
“Yay!” Lyla squealed, wiggling between them.
Tori shook her head at his determined behavior to not keep them a secret. What else could she do but go with it?
“Bacon or sausage, sweetheart?” He tapped Tori’s nose with his finger.
“Bacon, it’s my favorite.”
“Mine too!” Lyla chirped.
“Bacon it is. I’ll go start the coffee.” He kissed Tori again and then Lyla’s head.
“Did you have a slumber party with Daddy?” Lyla asked in her sweet voice, seated on Tori’s left. Rex squeezed her right knee for the dozenth time while they ate breakfast.
“Yes, I guess I did,” she said. “Are you okay with that?”
Lyla bobbed her head. “’Cept, can I come to it next time?”
Rex let out a hearty chuckle. “It’s not that kind of slumber party, sweetpea. But next time, we’ll make popcorn and watch a movie together before you go to bed.”
She scrunched her face, thinking, then smiled. “Okay.”
“See, that wasn’t so difficult,” he whispered in Tori’s ear.
“I guess not.” She looked into his eyes with longing. “I should be going. It’s after ten and I’m sure my… Well, I should get home and tend to Daisy.” Bringing up her dad at the breakfast table wouldn’t be right. The slight nod Rex gave her said he understood her. She loved how he never pushed her to talk.
“Your horse?” Lyla asked.
“Yep. Daisy needs me.” She twirled a golden lock of Lyla’s hair as the little girl’s face beamed brighter than the sun.
“Will you come back?”