by L. A. Boruff
Sitting back, I take my hands from them and rub between my eyes where a headache is forming. “We should try and get some sleep.” I yawn.
“Come on, I’ll show you where you can sleep. Cooper and I will sleep in here. Cole and Rob, if you want to share one of the other rooms, Toni can take the last one,” Jacob informs us, and it’s the most he’s said the entire time. Nodding, I stand.
Following after Jacob, I grab my bag before stopping. “Don’t keep the radio on at all times, only turn it on for an hour or so a day, we don’t know how long we could be down here. The first wave of fallout could last up to eighty days. It will contaminate everything outside and comes down like black rain, but it’s the long-lasting radiation we need to worry about. Check the generator as well and don’t overwork it. When we wake up we’ll ration the food and come up with a plan.” I nod, mentally checking off my list and making sure that’s everything I need to say before following Jacob down the hall.
He opens the first door on the left and I stick my head in. “Old bathrooms, I don’t know what will work, but—”
“We shouldn't use the water,” I warn and he nods. The room is an L shape with shower and toilet stalls. Carrying on around the corner, I see two more doors. One on the left and one at the very end of the corridor.
He nods at the farthest door. “That’s storage where Cole and Rob can sleep, this is you.” He swings open the other door and I step inside.
It’s small, probably a tad bigger than a cupboard, with a bed already built into the wall on the left. A small wooden dresser is placed next to the bed with a long forgotten, half melted candle there. Nothing else but a mop and bucket fill the room.
“I’ll grab you a light and some bedding,” he murmurs, before backing away and leaving me alone.
The floor and walls are the same depressing grey concrete, but I’ve never felt luckier. I’m alive, I’m safe, when thousands of others are not.
“Are you okay?” The voice makes me jump and I spin, clutching my chest. I was lost in a world of my own and Rob holds his hands up from his perch at the door frame where he just spoke.
“Don’t shoot,” he teases, and I smile.
“I’m good, sorry,” I reply.
He looks over his shoulder before stepping closer. “If you need anything just shout. I mean it Toni, I won’t let them hurt you.”
A throat clearing has us both looking over his shoulder to see an annoyed Jacob. He glares at Rob who nods at me and leaves. Jacob thrusts the bedding and light at me and turns to leave.
“Thank you and thanks for letting me in,” I say softly.
His shoulders drop and he looks back at me, his face less pissed off, which in my book is progress. “You’re welcome.” He looks in the direction where Rob disappeared. “Neither Cooper or me would hurt you, I promise you that. I’ll keep an eye on the new guy, I just wanted you to know.”
He leaves with that and I blow out a breath. Their promises are nice, but I need to be able to protect myself as well. Shutting the door behind him, I ram the mop from the wall under the handle, just in case. Then I quickly make the bed and light the electric lamp, placing it on the bedside table. Shucking off my jeans and shirt so I’m just in my black tank and panties, I slide my gun beneath the pillow and get under the covers, pulling the blanket to my chin and finally letting my tears fall.
I’m so sorry I never believed you, Daddy. I love you.
By the time I fall asleep, my eyes are raw and red, and nothing but snoring can be heard past my door, lulling me to sleep.
3
Day Two
I wake with a start, my breath coming in gasps as I rub my hands over my face. What a bad fucking dream. Frowning into the darkness I search for the light from my alarm clock. It must be pretty early if it’s still this dark. Unable to see my alarm clock, I grasp my wrist and feel my watch, pressing the little light up display. I see that it’s nine in the morning. It’s unusual that I would sleep in so late, and that's when it hits me. I’m not in my room back home, I’m in a windowless cellar in the middle of nowhere with four guys, sheltering from the apocalypse. Fuck.
Pushing up from the bed I rub my hands over my arms, my skin breaking out in goosebumps as I try to plan what to do next. Using the light from my watch, I rifle through my duffle bag to grab a plain, button-down shirt and throw it on over my tank top, hissing at the burning sensation on my skin. Holding my arms out, I stumble until I find the electric lamp, closing my eyes against the suddenly bright light filling the small room. Looking down at my skin I let out a curse at the angry red inflamed flesh. Stupid Toni, stupid! Don’t you remember anything Dad taught you?
Throwing open the door I stagger into the open part of the basement, seeing Jacob and Cooper talking quietly together on the corner of a mattress, their conversation coming to an end when I walk in. Copper smiles up at me while Jacob scowls, obviously still distrustful of me.
“Where are the others?” I question, not sparing time on pleasantries as I ignore them and walk back past the room I’d been staying in the storage area, finding Rob and Cole looking through the supplies.
“Toni, look, we have plenty of supplies, should last us a couple of days until—” Rob starts until I cut him off, Jacob and Cooper following me into the room.
“Have any of you showered yet?” I demand, my panic making my tone sharp.
“Hey, if you wanted to get me naked all you have to do is say so,” Cooper teases. In another situation I would have laughed and rolled my eyes, but I’m totally serious. Hurrying forward I grab Rob’s arm, grimacing when I see his skin looks just as raw as mine, a quick glance at Cole shows me the same thing. Hissing, Rob pulls away from my touch.
“Shit. Why does my skin burn so much?” Looking down at his skin, a concerned expression crosses his face before he looks up at me.
“Rob, Cole, in the shower now, we can’t wait any longer.” The four of them just stare at me in shock for a few seconds before I grab the cop by the shoulder of his shirt and push him toward the shower room. Turning to look at Cooper and Jacob, I grab their arms, letting out a relieved breath when I see their skin, while looking sore, appears much better than ours does. They were out in the open for less time than us, so their skin is less affected.
Striding out of the storage room, I throw a look over my shoulder. “You need to wash any dust off your skin, hurry.”
Jacob and Cooper share a look, but the latter follows me out, leaving Jacob scowling at me.
“Why should we trust you?” he calls out to me and I sigh, coming to a stop and turning to face him.
“I’m a nurse, I’m useful to have around, plus I’m going to need to clean out that wound on your arm before it gets infected,” I inform him, causing him to look down at his arm in surprise.
“It’s just a scratch.”
“Yeah, and there’s nuclear waste in the atmosphere. If you aren't careful it’s going to get infected,” I tell him, before shrugging and turning away from him. “I don’t have time to argue with you, I need to wash the dust from my skin.” Turning on my heel I leave him behind, walking to the shower room in the other corner of the basement.
I come to a stop when I’m met by two shirtless guys. If we were in a different situation I would probably be feeling pretty pleased with myself. Cole steps forward to turn on the shower before I dart over and grab his arm, wincing at his hiss of pain.
“No, we can’t use that water, it’s not pure anymore. We use the bottled water.”
“So now you want us to waste our bottled water?” Jacob retorts, and I feel like smacking him.
“It’s not a waste. The radioactive dust will cause our skin to peel if we don’t wash it off soon. I should have thought of it sooner.” I curse myself as I grab one of the large drums of bottled water. Cooper steps forward and helps me lift it, his eyes solemn as they meet mine.
“Don’t blame yourself, this is a new situation for all of us.” Something burns in his eyes and I have to bite
my lip to force down the sudden wave of need that runs through me. Although it’s not even sexual need necessarily, but the need to be held, for some affection in this awful situation. Shaking my head I pull away. Now is not the time Toni, you don’t even know these guys.
Stripping my clothes off, I stand before them in just my bra and pants and gesture for them to bring the water closer. “We need to wash our skin. It’s going to sting and the water will be cold, but we have to do it.”
The guys nod, and together we help each other douse ourselves. It takes a lot of our supply of water, but this is a necessity, and a bit of hurt pride and stinging skin is worth it versus the alternative. I shudder as I remember the photos shown to us in nursing school of what radiation poisoning does to the skin.
Hours later, we are all sitting in the open part of the basement in a loose semicircle on the edges of the mattresses when I gesture to Jacob’s arm.
“I need to clean and dress your wound.” I expect him to cause a fuss, to tell me no, but after a moment of sizing me up with his eyes he nods and allows me to see the wound. He was right, it’s a small injury, probably caught his arm on something when he was hurrying to get inside after the explosion, but it would get infected if we aren't careful with it. It still could, but I’m going to do everything I can to stop that from happening.
Thankfully, when I travel I always have a medical bag in the back of my car in case of emergencies, so I have some of the things I need for basic first aid. Cleaning my hands with the alcohol gel in the pack, I pull on a pair of gloves and examine the wound, taking my time to clean it out. I feel eyes on me while I do it, but I ignore them, focusing on the task in front of me.
“So, you’re a nurse huh?” Jacob asks, finally breaking the silence in the room.
“Uh huh, I worked in the ER in the city for the last few years,” I reply, lifting my gaze from his cut, and I’m shocked when I find him so close, his deep eyes boring into mine.
“Useful skill to have in an apocalypse!” Cooper calls out cheerily, and I can’t help but smile at his tone.
“Is he always like this?” I question Jacob with a shake of my head, my smile still in place as I place a dressing on his arm.
“Yup, always has been. Nothing keeps him down for long.” Jacob’s voice warms as he talks about his friend, and I get the feeling they are more like family. Tidying up my kit, I sit back on my heels.
“All done, I’ll check it again tomorrow. If all is well, it should be mostly healed by the end of the week.”
Jacob’s eyes linger on my face for a moment until I stand, breaking eye contact as I walk back toward the table in the center of the room, but I feel his eyes following me as I go. Cole sits at the table, looking at the radio as if he’s expecting it to give him all the answers. Placing my medical kit on the table I go to his side, taking a look at the wound on his head. I should have checked it yesterday, but with all the stress of what happened… It looks like he tried to clean it out already, probably during our impromptu showers earlier, but it will need proper cleaning.
“Cole, I need to take a look at your injury, I need to clean it and put a dressing on it. It might even need stitches,” I muse as I peer at the side of his head. Who knows what he may have washed into his wound when we showered earlier? Taking out a bottle of sterile saline and some sterile gloves, I go about cleaning his wound. It’s not very deep, but it's quite a long gash.
“Thanks, doc,” he says with a smile.
“You’re welcome,” I murmur distractedly. “You might need stitches,” I comment absentmindedly.
He flinches, his smile turning forced, and looks at the floor. “I mean it, thank you for everything. I wouldn’t be alive without you.” He blows out a breath and looks me straight in the face, his eyes filled with unshed tears. “I was terrified, I’ve never felt like that—ever. I guess fate brought me on this road and to you, huh?” he jokes, not even trying to hide his tears. It makes me hesitate as I look at him. He seems like the type of person who wants to be in control, and yet, he’s letting me see his weakness—why?
I squeeze his hand and he offers me another soft smile, our eyes connecting with shared understanding. I let go and move back to his head injury. It could probably use some stitches to help keep the edges of skin together but Cole refuses, fear of needles he says, so I have to resort to only dressing the wound.
Everyone is quiet today, subdued and lost in their own thoughts again. Which is understandable, it’s not everyday that you lose everything you know and love, facing an uncertain future. My thoughts turn to my family, to the dad I’d always dismissed as being eccentric, his training now the only thing keeping these guys and me alive.
Rob comes to sit next to me and I give him a weak smile when he settles by my side. He runs his eyes over my face and places his hand on my shoulder.
“You okay?” he asks softly. It's funny, I don't usually trust strangers, an instinct drilled into me by my dad, but I feel comfortable around Rob. I don't know if it's because he's a cop, or because of the situation that’s thrown us together, but I find myself wanting to lean into him for comfort, to feel his arms around me. I can still feel his gaze on me, waiting for an answer, and I meet his eyes with a shrug.
“I don't know. I mean, I'm here, I'm alive, but… everything is just so precarious.” I’m struggling to find the words to explain how I feel. Movement nearby has me looking around, only to see that Cooper and Jacob have moved to sit closer to us, the five of us sitting around the small table.
“Well, you're safe here. We won’t let anything happen to you.” Jacob’s voice is rough, and I meet his intense gaze. I wonder how I've managed to gain this man’s protection and trust when he’d been so reluctant to let me in initially.
“Yeah Toni, you're one of us now. You all are,” Cooper says with a smile, as he looks around the table. “We’ve all been thrown together and going out there is a death sentence right now anyway, so we just need to get along.” Cooper grins at Jacob, a playful glint in his eyes. “I've been trying to convince Jacob to make new friends for ages.”
Jacob just rolls his eyes at Cooper’s comment, but there are a couple of chuckles around the table and the mood has lightened a bit. Cole turns in his seat to look at me, placing his hand on top of mine where it rests on the table.
“They are right though, you’re safe with us. We’ll look after each other,” he reassures me.
I smile at him, very aware of the fact that Rob still has his palm on my shoulder and Cole's holding my hand. I don't tell them that I'm not worried about them, I can protect myself, but it's the radiation I'm worried about. My skin itches and burns, I'm sure theirs is the same, but we don't say anything.
“Well, it looks like we may be spending a good amount of time together,” Jacob drawls as he looks around the basement before his gaze falls on me again. “We should get to know a bit more about each other.”
Everyone's eyes turn to me. Huh, guess I'm going first then. Shrugging, I meet their gazes. “Not much to tell about me that you don't already know. I lived with a prepper, and as soon as I got the opportunity I left home and went to nursing school. I avoid going home as often as possible and now I've lost them.” My voice goes thick as I talk, my own self-loathing clear in my voice. Rob moves his hand to my knee, rubbing it slowly in comfort, silence filling the room.
“You have a boyfriend? Husband? How old are you anyway?” Jacob’s question catches me off guard and I bark out a laugh.
“Why, you interested? I'm twenty-five and no, I have no husband. Just a sleazy ex-boyfriend who apparently slept his way through the nursing staff at my hospital.” I roll my eyes as I think of Peter, said sleazy ex. He’s been trying to convince me for weeks that I should take him back after I found him in the supply closet while I was on shift, making out with one of my colleagues. No thank you, I don't need that kind of shit in my life.
“He cheated on you?” Cole's voice is outraged and I smile at his anger on my behalf. “H
e’s a fucking idiot, he should have cherished you like you deserve,” he states firmly, and I see a couple of nods around the table. Well then. Shaking my head I can't help but grin before looking over at Cole.
“Come on then, tell us more about you.”
“Me? Well, I'm twenty-eight, I'm a lawyer, as you know. My parents and sister moved to Europe several years ago and I stayed here to build my career… I’m starting to think I made the wrong choice.” He laughs bitterly, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. “I have no family here except an ex-wife who only ever married me for my money, no kids, I don't even have a dog. Work is my life,” he explains, and my heart goes out to him. What a lonely life. I squeeze his hand as he continues his story. “I just finished a nasty murder case in New York and my boss gave me some time off to recoup. I got in my car, intending to drive for an hour or so, but I just kept driving, miles and miles went by but I kept going. And now I'm here.” He looks around the table with a solemn smile. “Maybe I was brought here for a reason. The north of the country was hit pretty badly.”
We’re quiet for a few moments, acknowledging that Cole probably would have been killed if he hadn't kept driving for so long.
“Y'all know me,” Rob chimes in with his easy smile as he nods toward Cooper and Jacob. “I'm a deputy at the Spring station. I'm smart but I've never been book smart, so as soon as I graduated high school I joined the force and have been here ever since. I had a wife, Claire, but she died of cancer five years ago.”