“Yeah, what’s with that?” asks Titch. “Surely they could buy another?”
There have been no babies in the Las Vegas club for years. I, at least, have experience of Theo.
Demon for one understands as he enlightens the childless members, “My kid won’t go to bed without his blankie. Screams the fuckin’ place down without it. Yeah, kids can latch on to something. Skull’s wife probably thought the risk was worth taking.”
Thank fuck she did.
Crash is nodding. “But now, I think it’s safe to assume they’re in the wind. Key’s is doing the right thing, he might pop up somewhere.”
“Hopefully dead,” Rope offers.
I slowly nod my head. Yeah. I’d like that. While I want to be the one to see him take his last breath, knowing he’s six foot under would give me some satisfaction.
“He’s mighty young for an undercover cop,” Judge puts in. “He told us he was twenty-three when he started as a hangaround and twenty-five when he met Mel.”
I bristle and prepare to defend my woman should Judge mention the age difference.
Red shakes his head. “Some men don’t look their age. I would have taken him to be older, just from the way he carried himself. But he picked an age that he thought would make him acceptable to the club. Young enough so he doesn’t have to explain a long history, old enough to have some experience of life.”
“We think he’s going to run. Shouldn’t we have followed him?” This from Twister.
“No.” Red’s reply is short and sweet.
“So, you’re proposing he gets away scot-free?” Crash’s eyes are wide.
Now Red shakes his head. “No, Mel came up with the right idea.”
I was wondering whether Red was going to address her suggestion. The more we’ve agreed that our hands are tied, the more I’ve been thinking of doing things her way. Though it wouldn’t provide me with the same satisfaction, locking him up and throwing away the key could be a good solution. Once he’s in prison, well, we’ve got friends who’d be delighted to have something to relieve their boredom.
Red continues, “She wants to take him on legally, and I reckon she’s got a good case.”
Murmurs and growls of discontent go around the table. Words like bikers and cops don’t mix can be heard.
Red’s unperturbed. “Look at it this way. He used sex and a woman who’d have been unwilling if she knew what she’d been getting into. Can’t believe that was sanctioned. Even cops working undercover are bound by rules. I’m hoping we can get him where it will hurt and not in a physical way. At the least get him disgraced and cost him his job.”
“For fuck’s sake,” I start with a menacing growl. I was going to say that was far away from what he deserves.
But Twister gets in before I can complete that thought. “I like the way you think, Prez.”
Twister does? I don’t. “I want him to hurt,” I yell. “Lose his fuckin’ job? He needs to go to prison and we’ll take it from there. He should lose his life.”
Twister leans down the table and looks directly at me. “Oh, he will. We’ll just have to wait until he’s no longer a cop.”
“Could take years, Prez,” Crash warns.
“Yeah. We’ll need legal advice. But I say that’s what Pyro’s woman needs to do.” Again, Red’s eyes are full of sympathy as they meet mine. “Say you take him out, Pyro. Go to her tell her he’s dead. She’s got questions with no answers going around her head, no closure, and she’ll have done nothing to right her pain. I might only have known her a short time, but she’s an intelligent woman, and as I told you earlier, women don’t think like us. She needs to be involved, needs her own retribution, something that allows her to take back control. Don’t like the idea of putting a gun in her hand, women tend to be better with words. Which means she sits in the driver’s seat on this.”
Demon says firmly, “I know Mel, and I think Red’s correct.”
That pulls me up. They had read Mel right. She might want him dead but wouldn’t want it to be by her hand. Taking control and bringing a case against him like she had suggested, well, that does, as Red said, put her firmly with her hand on the wheel.
Would it help her get her head on straight?
“One more thing, Brother.” Demon’s dark eyes find mine. “Skull didn’t deserve the patch that he wore. He wasn’t even the man he said. Under those circumstances, he can’t claim a woman, or keep her claimed. You’re free to do whatever you want in the eyes of the club. I know what all the brothers will say, don’t need to take a vote on this.”
Hands bang the table in support of my prez’s words. Men here might be a different chapter, but we all wear the same patch.
I raise my chin in acknowledgement of what I’d love to have heard even a few hours before. Right now, there’s a woman upstairs who may never want to be claimed by a biker again.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Melissa
I might be a grown woman in my thirties, but right now I need my mom. Rosa’s doing her best, but I’m longing for my parents, for the only two people in my life that accept me for what I am, and who I have absolutely no doubt, love me.
“You going to give your man a chance?”
“How can I?” I turn my face toward Rosa, wiping away another tear. “I trusted Skull. Oh, I didn’t at first, thought he was too young, that someone like him wouldn’t be attracted to someone like me. I was right, wasn’t I? Should have run a mile then. But I believed him, believed all the lies that came out of his mouth.”
“What do you mean, someone like you?” she says, sharply.
“I’m thirty-four years old. And I think I’d be described as the homely type. Not biker chick material. I’m curvy…”
“Mel, hon. Lots of men like curvy. Have you seen Angel?”
I shake my head, not knowing who she’s talking about.
“She’s one of our club girls. She’s curvy, and much in demand. When visiting members come to the club, it’s often her they head straight for.”
“Bet she’s young.”
Rosa shrugs. “I’m forty-eight,” she offers. “I met my man at twenty-eight. Didn’t put him off none. You’re thirty-four which isn’t over the hill. And, under those tears, you’ve got a really pretty face.”
“Didn’t make Skull stick around though, did it?” I should start calling him by his real name, but Donavon, or even Don, doesn’t seem right, even in my head. “I work for the local government, Rosa. I could have been a cop’s wife. But he never gave me the chance. If he thought half of what he’d led me to believe, he would’ve never just walked out.”
“He already had a wife, Mel, so that wasn’t an option. He was in a tight spot, albeit one of his own making.” Rosa plays devil’s advocate. “He obviously wanted to keep his career choice away from the club. If he’d told you, you might have told them. He couldn’t take the chance.”
I can’t contradict her. I’ve gotten close to the club. I couldn’t risk Vi’s man being sent down without warning them. Skull admitting he was undercover would have had to have led to an explanation that he wasn’t free to pursue a relationship with me. Yeah, my loyalties may very well have switched to my new friends, instead of the man I professed to love.
“They’d have been out for his blood.” Rosa continues, “He probably wouldn’t have made it out alive. This betrayal is too great.”
“But he’s protected…”
“He is now, but then? If he’d told you, he’d have never gotten out of town.”
Stubbornly I tell her, “But he could have contacted me and explained after he left…” I remember the despair I’d felt when day after day passed and I’d heard no word.
“Same thing. There was a risk you’d tell the club, and they’d never have given up searching for him.”
I still can’t get my head around how he walked away earlier without even a backward glance. “Rosa… he was so cold. Even when I told him about the baby. He,” again the sobs rise, “he
, he asked me to do a DNA test.”
“You probably shocked him.” She snorts. “That’s probably the last thing he wanted to hear in front of his wife. Fuck, that has probably destroyed their relationship.”
“You sound like you’re on his side, Rosa.”
“The only side I’m on is yours. Look. What he’s done is despicable. Looking at the cold hard facts I’m not surprised you’re feeling as bad as you are. I’m trying to help you. Right now, you’re looking at black and white.” As she says the colours, she holds out one hand then the other palm facing up. “Somewhere there’s the truth, and it probably sits more to one side than the other.”
I shake my head. “The truth is, he lied to me then deserted me. Can’t get any plainer than that.”
She purses her lips, and a moment passes before she speaks again. “Yeah, try as I might, I can’t find a way to soften that blow.”
“He raped me, Rosa. I’d never have consented had I known I was being used. He violated me. Took my trust and gave it back to me in tatters. He broke my heart when I thought he was dead, then, when I found he was alive, I had to mourn all over again, this time because he’d knowingly left me. Now?” I put my fist to my mouth. How the hell do I go on?
She tilts her head to one side while she examines me. “What’s Pyro like?”
Shaking my head, I tell her, “I don’t know. I thought I knew him, but I didn’t know Skull, did I?” I pull up my knees, link my arms around them, and start rocking back and forth.
“Pyro’s been with the club a long time,” she tells me. “I’ve met him a few times before, when he’s come here with the club. He’s a good man, Mel. What you see with him is what you get.”
Stubbornly I again shake my head. “How would I know? I’m the dumb ass who believes anything anyone tells them.”
“Do you think Demon is stupid? Or Red?”
“Demon patched Skull in.”
“Yes, that’s true.” Her brow creases. “Or was it when Hellfire was still prez? Anyway, to the best of my recollection, I think Pyro’s been in the club going on ten years. If he had any failings, I think they’d know. Skull, though, he’d only worn his patch a few months. Talk to Pyro. You need someone on your side, hon.”
“I need my mom and dad,” I suddenly cry out, feeling like a little kid all over again.
Rosa’s arm reaches around my back, and her fingers press in. “That’s probably a good idea, hon.”
“I need to book a flight. I’ll go back to Pueblo as soon as I can.” In fact, I might go straight to Denver. What would it be like going back to the club? Will they view me as part of Skull’s deceit? Would they think I knew all along? I had been pressing Vi for info. How would they treat me? Without Skull, without Pyro, I could never return.
Her shoulders rise and fall. “Club will sort that for you, hon. Right now, you shouldn’t be travelling alone. You’re upset, and, well…”
I’m carrying a baby inside me. It has only been a week, yet it seems so long ago that Pyro and I were so happy to see our son on the screen. To know he was alive and healthy. I’d even thought I’d felt him moving, though I’ve not had that feeling again and had probably been mistaken.
My baby doesn’t deserve to have a sperm donor like Skull.
“Hon, I need to get downstairs and see about getting dinner going. You going to be okay on your own? I can get Tiffany to come up and keep you company if you want.”
But I don’t want anyone else to know how foolish I’ve been. Oh, I know she’ll already have heard, the rumour mill will be going full force. Everyone must be talking about what went on in that basement. Rosa’s been good and kind, and hasn’t let her pity or criticism show. But I know what everyone must be thinking, why hadn’t I suspected Skull wasn’t what he seemed?
“I’ll be fine.” Belatedly I dismiss her offer of company. “I’m worn out. I’d like to be alone.”
“Hon, yes, you must be exhausted. You get some rest. I’ll come up and see you later.”
I give a final small nod. She goes.
Rest? My body is tired, my mind though, it won’t stop racing. There’s a loop in my head replaying every moment from the time I first saw Skull, to that fateful morning he’d left. Little things come back to me, like how he’d wanted me to get close to Vi. I shudder, he was making me spy for him, and I hadn’t had the slightest suspicion. I feel dirty that he ever laid his hands on me.
So dirty, filthy.
I get to my feet, grab some clean clothes and a towel, and go to one of the communal bathrooms. I lock the door, turn the water hot, then get in and start scrubbing. I raise the temperature and clean myself all over, then again and again, trying to rub the memory of his touch from my skin, but it’s not working. The water grows cooler then goes cold, but still I haven’t removed all his filth, so I wash myself again.
Suddenly the door I know I locked is opened.
Pyro’s standing there. He moves forward, his arm snaking around me to turn off the water, then picks up the towel and holds it out.
“Is she okay?” a masculine voice I don’t recognise calls.
“She will be,” Pyro replies with certainty. “Come on, darlin’.”
I’m standing naked, the cold water having caused goosebumps to rise all over my skin. I’m shivering, and I hadn’t realised I’d become so cold. I let him place the towel around my shoulders unable to even feel embarrassed that this is the first time he’s seen me without clothes.
“I can’t get clean,” I tell him, through chattering teeth. “I could have betrayed the club without knowing or meaning to. I’ve got filth all over me and I can’t wash it off.”
“You’re clean,” he replies tersely, even as he’s lifting me in his arms. Before going out through the door he glances down to make sure I’m covered, moving a corner of the towel to conceal an inch of bared skin. “It’s him who’s covered in shit, not you. I won’t have you taking any of this on yourself. If we didn’t suspect him, Mel, how could we expect you to?”
We’re back in the room, and he places me carefully on the bed and then closes the door. He comes over, lying down behind me, and pulling me to him.
“That’s what people will be thinking. What did I know? Was I in it with him? Was I trying to get info on the club? Was I betraying you? I lived with him, how could I not know?”
“No one will be thinking anything of the sort,” he states, firmly. “Prospects do their time for a reason, to earn our trust. Skull was clearly in it for the long haul. He knew he’d have to start at the bottom and make his way up. He took all the shit, and a severe beating. We didn’t see anything to make us suspicious. We trusted him. The whole club trusted him, Mel. If all of us couldn’t see what was in front of our noses, why the fuck would we expect you to?”
“Then you must have doubts about me. Maybe I’ve been fooling you as well.”
“Might as well have doubts about Judge and Wills. They’ve only patched in recently. Christ, Mel, we’d tie ourselves up in knots if we let one bad apple influence our thoughts about everyone else. Truth be told, there were always some questions about the prospect we’d known as Runt. Not everyone took to him. But he took a beating and came back, was patched in and took the name Skull. That’s when we stopped asking questions. He had us fooled, Mel. In hindsight, we’ll rethink shit and see there were signs we didn’t think to note. But you? Nah. I’ve been with you every step of the way since Skull disappeared, and every reaction you’ve had has been genuine.” He pauses, then resumes, “Might as well take the blame on ourselves. You saw Skull had the trust of the club, so didn’t look further than the surface he showed to you. Yeah, if we had no doubts, why should his old lady?”
Had their faith in him coloured my views? I hadn’t looked deeper as I hadn’t expected there’d be anything to find.
I bark a mirthless laugh. Me, a woman who’d snagged herself a younger, and very fit man.
“Mel?”
“I’ve been so foolish, Ro. I believed wh
at I wanted to. I gave Skull what he wanted dressed up in a bow.”
“Can’t argue, Mel. Skull chose you for a reason, but part of it must have been he wanted you in bed. Any man would. If you weren’t claimed, I’d be fighting off a number of my brothers. You’re a fuckin’ attractive woman, Mel, and that’s something you mustn’t forget.”
Forget? I don’t remember knowing it in the first place. But all I say is, “I’m not claimed.” Surely the club won’t still expect me to be tied to a traitor? I want no one to ever refer to me as Skull’s old lady again.
He turns me to face him, and his hand brushes the wet hair back from my face. “Mel, I’m an open book. You’re one hundred percent genuine. And I’m going to work to prove to you that so am I. This might not be what you want to hear right now, but Skull’s out of the picture and I’m free to claim you.”
If I’m no longer tied to Skull, I’m free to be with Pyro. But I can’t. I don’t want to be claimed by anyone, do I? Not now, not knowing what happened before.
But he hasn’t finished. “I love you, Mel. Love you and already love that baby that’s mine in all the ways that count. I want to claim you, if you want to be claimed. I know I can say it until I’m blue in the face, but you can trust me. I will never knowingly hurt you. Won’t say I’ll never make a mistake, but it won’t be with any intention.”
Skull told me he loved me. He lied.
Christ, right at this moment I need to believe Pyro’s declaration is true, that his words are ones I can take at face value. To be truly loved, for me, and not what I could do. Try as I might, I can’t see Pyro has any ulterior motive.
He gives me time, and my mind loops back again. Not to Skull, I’m trying to put him out of my head, but to all the times Pyro has been there for me. From the moment Skull disappeared, Pyro’s been my rock and has been proving himself without saying the words. With Skull it was what he said, which were all lies. Pyro? Maybe his actions speak louder.
“Can I ask you something?”
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