Cut to the Crone

by Amanda M. Lee

  “That’s because she’s more interested in the mage powers,” Aric noted. “She might be a daddy’s girl at heart, but she wants to be her mother.”

  Zoe rolled her eyes. “You believe that more than anybody else.”

  “It’s the truth. She has a fabulous, badass mother who can handle anything. Who wouldn’t want to embrace that?”

  Zoe’s cheeks turned a mottled shade of red and she quickly changed the subject. “Um ... what about you?” she asked me. “Why are you so interested in Sami?”

  I shrugged. “I told you about my past. I might be able to get answers, and sooner rather than later. The thing is, I’m not sure I’m ready. When I think about you and Aric, all the terrible circumstances you’ve dealt with while struggling to keep your child safe, I feel true fear. And I also feel as if I’m not worthy. You guys are probably the best parents who have ever existed.”

  Zoe snorted and Aric shook his head.

  “That’s not true,” Aric said. “Sami once pitched an unholy fit in the stuffed animal aisle of a toy store because she wanted them all and I seriously considered leaving her there.”

  “You didn’t, though.”

  “I might’ve.”

  I smirked. “Except you’re joking when you tell that story. Someone really left me. That’s the sort of people I come from.”

  He sobered. “Zoe told me your story, and I’m sorry about that. It has to be traumatic for you. I don’t want to tell you your business, but you don’t know what was happening when they made that decision. They obviously kept you,” he said. “It’s not like they abandoned you as a baby. To me, that indicates they wanted you. I love my child. I would do whatever it took to stay with her. If my only choice was letting her go or losing her to death or something else, though, I would like to think I’m a good enough parent to let her go.”

  I stared at him for a beat and nodded. “I would like to believe that’s why I was abandoned,” I replied truthfully. “What if it was something else, though? That’s what I can’t shake. I mean, you and Zoe are obviously good parents, devoted to your child. I have no proof that my parents felt the same way about me.”

  For the first time since the conversation started, Gunner stirred. “That’s not entirely true. Ezekiel says that your grandfather at least loved you very much.”

  “No, Ezekiel says that a grandfather loved a three-year-old very much. No matter how much he insists I was that child, we can’t know for certain.”

  “We could. You just don’t want to take that chance.”

  “I’m not ready to go there yet. I thought you understood.”

  He immediately raised his hands. “I’m sorry. I do understand. I’m just worried. I can see your mind drifting when you think nobody is looking. Don’t let the fear get the better of you.”

  “I’ll do my best,” I promised. “For now, I want to hear more stories about Sami being a tyrant as a kid. I bet she was fun.”

  “Sometimes,” Aric agreed. “Other times she was a monster.”

  “Those are the stories I want to hear.”

  “Remember you’re the one who requested them. If you have nightmares, I don’t want to hear a word about it.”

  I FLOATED INTO SLEEP MOMENTS AFTER my head hit the pillow. Gunner spooned behind me, pressing a kiss to the back of my ear, and then passing out.

  Thanks to the magical moonshine, my dreams were pleasant, and maybe a little romantic, which is why when I felt the wave of pain wash over me, I didn’t recognize what was happening.

  Everything hurt. Everything. I think there was a possibility even my hair hurt. Where was it coming from?

  I opened my mouth to scream but no sound would come out. And then I heard it. Whispers. Someone was whispering inside my mind.

  I reacted instinctively, lashing out with my magic and creating a barrier. The assault ceased immediately, and when I bolted to a sitting position, I found Emma standing at the end of the bed glaring at me.

  “What the ...?”

  Her smile was evil. “Good evening, Scout. It took you long enough.”

  I glanced at Gunner to make sure he was okay and found he was completely out. He hadn’t even stirred.

  “Don’t worry about him,” Emma admonished. “He’s dead to the world, and he’ll stay that way until I say it’s okay for him to wake up.”

  I rubbed my cheek. “If you hurt him ...” I didn’t bother finishing. I could think of a million terrible things to threaten her with and they were all warring for supremacy.

  “I have no interest in hurting him. Right now. I’m here to talk.”

  “What do you want to talk about?” I needed to buy myself time to wrap my head around what was happening. “More importantly, how did you get in here?”

  “You mean the wards surrounding the cabin?” Emma was clearly amused. “A child could slip through those wards. Honestly, I expected better from you.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “How about we take it outside and I’ll show you better?”

  Her chuckle was light. “Oh, I do like your attitude. That’s why I think this is going to be so much fun. I’m not here to talk tonight, though.”

  “Yeah?” While she might not have been here to fight, she obviously had no problem poking a sleeping witch. “What is it you want to talk about?”

  “Life. Death. The mage.”

  I frowned. How could she even know about Zoe? “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I lied. “You’re confused.”

  “Oh, that was good.” Emma’s eyes lit with amusement. “If you were talking to somebody else, anybody else, they might fall for that. Obviously, you’re not dealing with a rube.”

  Frustration bubbled up. I hated how amused she sounded. “What do you want?”

  “So many things.” Emma turned her attention to my dresser, to a framed photograph of Gunner and me. I wasn’t much for taking photos but Raisin snapped it at a gathering and gave it to us as a gift. I was rather fond of it now. “Right now, I want to know why that woman is here. What’s her plan?”

  I cocked an eyebrow. Well, that was interesting, wasn’t it? Emma might be a masterful liar when it came to others, but she couldn’t hide things from me. “You’re frightened of her.”

  “No.” Emma shook her head and flashed a tight smile that looked forced. “I’m not frightened of anybody. The worst thing that could ever happen to me has already happened, and I’m fine.”

  She was full of it. “You’re terrified of her.” I lobbed a smug grin in her direction because I knew it would grate. “She said she was famous in certain circles. I’m guessing she was the source of nightmares for that vampire crew you used to run with.”

  “I didn’t run with those vampires out of choice,” Emma snarled. “In case you’ve forgotten, I’m the one who set things up for you to take them out.”

  “I’m still the one who did the heavy lifting.”

  “Only because I was limited. I’m no longer limited. By anything.”

  “Then that’s good for both of us. How about we go outside and test that theory?”

  “Oh, good grief.” Emma rubbed her forehead. “Why can’t you wrap your head around the fact that I’m not here to fight? I just want to talk. Fighting will come soon enough.”

  I figured that was the case — she was clearly playing a game — but the statement made me feel vulnerable, if only because she’d managed to infiltrate my inner sanctum and Gunner was currently incapable of defending himself.

  “I don’t have anything to offer you,” I said. “I don’t know what you want from me.”

  “The mage.” For the first time since waking, I saw a flash of anger in Emma. She was trying to hide under a veneer, but there were cracks in the facade. “Why is she here?”

  I internally debated my options and then decided to take a novel approach. “Vampires. She’s looking for vampires.” It wasn’t exactly a secret, and if something bad happened because of my loose lips, I would be forever sorry. I wanted to see how she re
acted.

  Emma’s forehead wrinkled as she gripped the framed photo. “My vampires?”

  I hesitated and then said, “There are new vampires in the mix. They came from Covenant College.”

  “Covenant College is no more. It’s been gone for years.”

  “Apparently there are vampires still ticked off about that fact.”

  Emma cocked her head and I could practically hear the gears in her mind working. “Interesting. She’s the mage that flattened the college. I suspected since her reputation is outrageous, but I couldn’t be sure. The master talked about her, of course.” She set the photograph down and turned her attention to the painting on the wall. It wasn’t mine. It was here when I moved in. I simply hadn’t gotten around to removing it. I found the bear fishing in the river in the painting oddly soothing for some reason, although I couldn’t say entirely why. “He had grand plans for her, but underneath all the bravado, I could tell he was afraid. They all were.”

  “She’s something to fear,” I agreed.

  “She’s mythical to a lot of these creatures.” Emma’s smile was back. “I’ve always wanted to meet her.”

  “Come out during the day and I can arrange it.”

  “Tell me about the child.”

  That right there was where I drew the line. “She seems fine.”

  Emma’s eyes flashed with impatience. “That’s not what I’m asking.”

  “I’m well aware. I can’t help you.”

  “You mean you won’t help me.”

  “As you like.” I tilted my head in her direction. “The girl is none of your business.”

  “She’s a child of two worlds, like us.”

  I froze. “What do you mean?”

  “You still don’t get it, do you?” Now there was pity reflected back at me. “I want to hate you, I really do, but you’re so pathetic. How do you hate the pathetic?”

  “I have no problem hating you.”

  She snorted. “You talk big, but your fear serves as your shadow, and it’s an entity in and of itself. It will be your downfall.”

  “If you have all the answers, why not just tell me what you know?”

  “Because I owe you and I hate that fact.” Her eyes narrowed. “I don’t want to help you. I want to destroy you. Please tell me you’ve at least picked up on that.”

  “Oh, I have no doubt.” I flashed her a sweet smile. “That doesn’t explain why you snuck in here tonight under the cover of darkness just to talk. You could’ve killed me while I was under.”

  “That’s not how I play the game. When I come for you, you’ll see it. I don’t believe in attacking from behind.”

  “You just attacked while I was asleep.”

  She snickered. “That’s almost a fair point, although it wasn’t an attack as much as a test. I’m understandably curious about your abilities, after all. My understanding is that you’re completely self-made. You did all of this on your own.”

  “You understand right.” I was proud of what I’d managed to accomplish and I wasn’t about to deny it. “I’m dangerous.”

  “You are.”

  “But you’re not afraid of me.”

  “Should I be afraid of you? Do you want to hurt me?” She mock shuddered. “I’m all atingle.”

  I rolled my eyes. “You say I talk a big game, but you’re just as bad. You want me to think you’re superior but you’re afraid of what I can do. That’s why you’re here. Now, I don’t doubt that you want to punish me, make me pay for some perceived slight.” I paused. “I also think you want to gauge my willingness to join your cause.”

  “What’s my cause?”

  That was a very good question. “I don’t know. If you need help ...” Did I trust her enough to offer aid? I wasn’t certain. “You can always tell me what you need. I might not be able to help but I won’t outright attack. You don’t need to play this game.”

  “Obviously I do.” Emma moved away from the end of the bed, her gaze returning to the photo. “He makes you weak. You know that, right?”

  I didn’t need to ask what “he” she was referring to. He remained asleep beside me in the bed. “He makes me strong.”

  “If you have someone in your life that you would consider dying for, it makes you weak. Trust me.” She edged toward the door. “The mage isn’t what she appears to be. She’s ... more. At one time she might’ve been a beacon of light but that changed when she took control of the book.”

  “What book?”

  “The only book that matters.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  She studied my face and then grinned. “You don’t, do you? I should’ve realized. Perhaps you should ask her about it. If she hasn’t volunteered that rather colorful part of her history, there’s probably a reason.”

  I shook my head. “I don’t believe you. I’m not going to fall victim to your lies.”

  “It’s not a lie. The Archimage was once considered the most powerful book in the world. Now she controls it and all the secrets contained between the covers. Ask yourself what that means.”

  I kept my face impassive. “Thanks for the visit. We really shouldn’t do this again.”

  “Next time you’ll see me coming. You’d better prepare yourself.”

  “No problem. I’ll be waiting.”

  Thirteen

  I managed to sleep, although it shouldn’t have been possible. I recognized that Emma was telling the truth about at least one thing, though. When it came time for a battle, she was likely to attack from the front, not the back.

  Gunner stirred next to me and murmured, “Morning.”

  I’d debated long after Emma left whether I should tell him what happened. Ultimately I knew that keeping things from him would result in problems, and that wasn’t what I wanted. I spent the bulk of my life keeping things to myself, being strong for me and nobody else. If I wanted this relationship to work, and I did, I had to be honest.

  “How did you sleep?” He slipped his arm around my waist and tugged me to his side, brushing his lips against my forehead.

  “I slept okay.”

  “Hmm.”

  “After,” I added.

  “After what?” He was still waking up so he hadn’t yet figured out that I was tense.

  “Emma was here last night.”

  His body went rigid. “What?” Instantly, he was wide awake and glaring at me.

  I forced a smile I didn’t feel. The last thing I needed was him panicking. “She was in our bedroom. The wards didn’t keep her out.”

  “But ...” He pushed himself to a sitting position and scanned the room as if he expected her to jump out from one of the corners and attack. “Why didn’t you wake me? Heck, why didn’t I wake up myself?”

  “She cast a spell to keep you asleep.” I rested my hand on his forearm in an attempt to soothe but I could feel his muscles bunching. “She pretty much said that. You were never in any danger.”

  A dark look came over his features. “I don’t care about that. I’m worried about you. Did she try to hurt you?”

  I shook my head and carefully told him about the visit, leaving nothing out. “She was more interested in Zoe,” I admitted. “I think she’s afraid of her.”

  “Wouldn’t you be? The woman’s reputation is off the charts. If you believe the stories — and after meeting her I’m not sure what to believe — then she can flatten an entire college.”

  “She didn’t do that. The god did that.”

  “The god they won’t talk about. Have you considered they made up that part so that people don’t band together to kill her out of fear?”

  “No. She’s truthful.”

  He cast me a sidelong look. “You like her.”

  “I do. You like her, too.”

  “I like the kid,” he corrected. “I find the kid hilarious. She’s a giant menace in the body of a waif. Who doesn’t like that?”

  I laughed. “Sami is at that age where she can’t help herself
from being obnoxious. She’s got all these hormones and she doesn’t know how to deal with them. She likes to push boundaries. It’s basically a science experiment to her.”

  “Zoe likes to push boundaries, too.”

  “She does,” I agreed without hesitation. “I have a feeling she was just like Sami at that age. That’s why she deals with things the way she does. She doesn’t fly off the handle. She accepts, exerts rules when necessary, and tries to talk to Sami on an adult level. That’s all Sami really wants, to be seen as an equal.”

  “She’s still a child.”

  “A child with the power in her fingertips to set off the magical equivalent of a nuclear bomb.”

  Gunner sighed. “You can feel it when you’re around them, can’t you?”

  “What?”

  “Power. They’re unbelievably powerful. I mean, you’re powerful, too, but Zoe ...”

  “She could do anything she sets her mind to. She’s a good person, though. She fights for the right side. She’s not a threat.”

  “I didn’t say she was.” His grin was crooked. “I like how you’re suddenly Zoe’s biggest champion even though you barely know her. It’s kind of cute.”

  His tone wasn’t condescending, so I didn’t snap at him. “Aric is her greatest champion. They have a bond that ... it’s miraculous to me.”

  “You don’t think we have that bond?”

  “I think they’ve been at it a little longer than us. If you’re worried, I somehow don’t feel bonded to you, don’t. We’re bonded. In fact, we’re bonded on a level I wasn’t sure I would ever be capable of experiencing. They’re different. It’s not that we won’t end up just as bonded as them, so don’t go getting weird on me. They’ve spent more than twenty years together, though. They have a magical child they would both die to protect. They’re ... amazing.”

  To my surprise, he barked out a laugh. “Relationship goals?”

  “Are you saying you don’t want to be like them in twenty years?”

  “Of course not.” He shook his head. “I actually like them. Aric is basically shifter royalty and yet he’s down to earth. Shifters are taught they’re supposed to be powerful and in charge, yet his wife is stronger than him.”