by Keri Lake
“It’s not excessive, nor unusual after intercourse,” Haseya says, as she presses on my belly, with two fingers up inside me. The chasing frown on her face adds dread to the discomfort already churning inside of me. “Your uterus seems a bit large for eight weeks. Are you certain of your last menstrual cycle?”
Thankfully, Six is waiting outside, with whoever else gathered to see what the commotion was about, otherwise he’d probably have a dozen, or more, questions for Haseya right now.
Lying on my back, with my legs bent, I mentally calculate the last time I had to think about bleeding. Every girl born into a generation of Ragers that can smell the blood knows down to the hour, when their cycle begins, and I last had mine before I ventured out beyond the wall after Papa’s death, a little over two months ago. “Fairly, yes.”
“Hmmm. Any pain when I press here?” She moves her hand over my belly and adds pressure.
“No. I’ve only had some cramping, and then the blood.”
“I’m not finding excessive blood in the vaginal canal, so perhaps we’ll wait and see. You should rest, as I’m sure traveling has taken it’s toll on you.”
“At eight weeks? Doesn’t that seem early to have concerns like this?”
“Every pregnancy is different, sweetheart. I’m not entirely convinced you’re only two months along. You lost one prior to this, correct?”
“Yes. I ate some berries. I didn’t realize they were …”
“I’m not passing judgment.” She removes her fingers from inside me and dips both hands into an awaiting wash bin, scrubbing them with soap. “No intercourse for a couple of days. Just until we know what’s going on with the little peapod. I suspect it’s normal bleeding, perhaps even caused by implantation. But assuming you are as early as you say, there are a number of reasons, and I’d like to rule some of them out.”
“Thank you.” I lower my legs, covering them with the thin blanket Six gave me earlier.
With a smile, she dries her hands on a piece of cloth she brought into the tent with her, and rests her palm against my stomach. “Let’s not worry until we know for sure, okay? It doesn’t help.”
“Promise.”
She huffs and flattens her lips. “Who’s gonna be the one to convince Rhys not to worry, hmmm? I swear that man frets over you more than he would if a horde of Ragers ran through the camp right now.”
I chuckle, my worries dissipating with her calm voice. “I’ll assure him there’s nothing to worry about yet.”
“Good. And I’ll break the news that he has to abstain for a day, or two. Then you’re free to do your thing afterward.” She waggles her brows and snorts a laugh. “Now, rest.”
Rest. Which means no going forward, onto Florida, because of me. We’ve spent the past weeks gathering enough supplies to make the trek there, as well back, in the event east is worse than from where we came.
The moment Haseya moves the woven door aside, Six is standing there, his eyes flitting from me to the midwife. Behind him is a small crowd that keeps their distance from him, perhaps fearing what he’ll do if there is a problem.
Haseya places her hand to his chest and gives him a light pat. “She needs rest. And calm. Rest and calm, clear?”
Offering an impatient nod, he enters the cave, closing the door behind him, and sits against the wall on the opposite side. The way he rubs his shaved skull reminds me of the days back when he was just a boy, tormenting himself over the possibility that he’d hurt me.
“Hey.” I lift my head, staring down at him. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m okay.”
Hands braced at his skull, he breathes hard through his nose and shakes his head.
“Six, it wasn’t as much blood as I thought. And she said the cramping could be implantation.”
He watches me in silence, and I can’t tell if my words are reaching him, or not, until he wordlessly gets to his feet and settles in beside me, placing his hand over my belly. The man has always been quietly contemplative, perhaps from the days before he found his voice, but at times like these, I find it frustrating.
“You’re going to lie here and torment yourself all night, aren’t you? You’re going to blame yourself and hate yourself, and it’s all going to be for nothing, because I’m fine.”
“I know. You’re strong. Strongest woman I know.”
“Strong enough to kick your ass, if you don’t give up this self-loathing thing you do. Believe me, Six. I’ll tell you when something’s your fault. I’m good at that.”
He snorts and kisses me on the shoulder. “You are. We’ll stay here until you’re well enough to travel.”
Sighing, I look away toward the fire. “We had such high hopes of arriving in two days.”
Cupping my face, he draws my attention back to him. “If this place exists, it isn’t going anywhere. I’ll wait as long as it takes to ensure you’re well enough for our travels.”
I lift my gaze to the surrounding cave and smile. “This place is cozy enough. Maybe we’ll stay here forever, then.”
“Wherever makes you happy.” He strokes his hand down my hair and presses his lips to mine. “I’d camp in the middle of hell, itself, to stay by your side, woman.”
“It’s hot enough in here, isn’t it?”
A chuckle rumbles inside his chest, and he rolls onto his back. “You make it twice as warm, but yes, I’m sweating my ass off in this cave.”
“I’m missing the tinaja back at the old cave. Remember swimming there? Cooling off in the water?”
“Putting a baby inside of you.” The flicker of his brows catches my attention. “Perhaps I was too hasty. Too demanding. I had dreams of your belly stretched with my child. But maybe it was all too soon.”
I run my knuckles down his cheek. “I want this baby, too. And it won’t be long before that happens. Maybe even sooner. According to Hesaya, my uterus is measuring bigger than she expected.”
He glances out the corner of his eye, and his brows crease even further. “Is that unusual?”
“I suppose a bit, but I’m not going to worry until I have reason. And you shouldn’t, either.”
“I won’t, then. Until I have reason.”
“Good.” I run my finger over the deep grooves in his forehead. “I’d love to see you without all this worry written across your face all the time.”
“It’s the result of being crazy over you.”
Chapter 7
Cali
I lie beside Cadmus, head propped on a rolled-up sleeping bag, and watch out the back of the truck as the sun begins to set, casting shades of orange and red. A blanket lies draped across his groin, beneath which he’s shamelessly naked, not having bothered to dress after what we did earlier. Back at Calico, there was no modesty when it came to nudity. Doctors there would strip us down in front of a crowd of other doctors, who proceeded to poke and prod. At some point, we simply became as comfortable without clothes as with. Fabric never offered much of a shield to our dignity, anyway.
Even so, I lie fully clothed alongside him.
He sucks in a drag of his cigarette and blows off the smoke.
“Smoking kills, you know,” I say with a smile in my voice.
“Yeah, well, so does love.” The cigarette crackles with another lungful, and he lifts his head as he flicks what’s left of it out the back of the truck, drawing my attention to his short-cropped, blond curls that have begun to grow in.
“Where did the curls come from?”
“My mother.” He bends his arm behind his head and stares off. “She had long, beautiful curls that reached the middle of her back. I always played with her hair when I was a kid.”
“What happened to her?”
“I don’t know. I woke up one morning, and she was gone.” Brows furrowed, he shakes his head. “I don’t know if someone took her, or if she up and left.”
What a horrible thing that must’ve been for him, wondering, all those years, what happened to his mother. And which fate would be worse?
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“Can I ask you a question?” There’s something soothing about Cadmus’s voice. It reminds me of Valdys, so deep and rich, as it vibrates in my ear.
“Yeah, of course.” I push the thoughts of Valdys aside, for fear of the panic that waits to swallow me any second. The unresolved ache of yet another dead end in our efforts to track down those rebels and set him free.
“That night I went down to the tunnels. Were you really going to let me fuck you?”
Blowing out a breath, I shift my attention to his profile, which doesn’t show a hint of amusement. “Why are you asking me this now?”
“Told you, Cali. I get off on pain. Every stab. Every cut. Reminds me that I still feel something.”
The question is one I’ve asked myself since that night, and in light of the guilt that still tears at my heart after what we’ve just done, it’s one I might answer differently now. “I would’ve done anything to be with Valdys. But not at your expense.”
“Well, ain’t that a kick in the nuts.”
“I might’ve ultimately tried that in the end.” I chuckle, elbowing him in the arm.
Snorting a laugh, he stares off and shakes his head. “Probably would’ve deserved it, for all the dirty shit I thought about doing to you back then.” His smile fades into something more serious. “I’d never touch you that way now.” Brows pinched in anguish, he looks away, his throat bobbing with a swallow, as that darkness clouds his expression all over again. “Never.”
“I know you wouldn’t.” Palm to his cheek, I guide his eyes back to mine. “You have a good heart. Deep, deep down.” I purse my lips to hold back a smile. “Like … bottom of the sea deep.”
“Yeah.” His lips stretch to a grin again, his eyes lighter than before. “Covered in black murky fish shit.”
Both of us laugh, and I rest my ear against his heart. “Well, at least we know where to find it.”
At the sound of scuffling outside, I lift my head, and Cadmus shifts beneath me. A glance back at him shows his finger pressed against his lips, as he sits up beside me. Two figures stand at the mouth of the truck--a man I’ve never seen before, dressed in rags that hang off his body, holding a gun to Brandon’s temple.
On instinct, I kick myself back against the cage for the silver box behind me.
“’The hell is this? More of ya. And a woman, too.” The man’s grin widens to a toothless smile, and as Cadmus lurches forward, he points the gun at him, then back to Brandon. “You just stay where you are.”
“Who are you?” The bored tone in Cadmus’s voice tells me he’s neither threatened by this man, nor concerned for Brandon.
Besides, when an enormous figure strides toward the two males, it’s clear the stranger has more to worry about right now than any of us. A blade slides beneath his throat from behind, wielded by Titus, and the man releases Brandon, holding his hands up in surrender.
Once free, Brandon glares back at his captor. “Was gathering up some supplies, when this asshole put a gun to my head.”
“Where? Are there others?” My sudden intrigue gives life to a lead I thought was dead.
It makes sense, though, why we wouldn’t find the rebels in plain sight. Of course they’d be hiding. It’s what they were known to do. How they managed to evade Legion.
“One of the buildings,” Brandon answers, climbing into the back of the truck with me.
Two more men creep toward Titus, but his gaze sliding to the side tells me he’s sensed them. Both men hold guns outstretched and pointed at him. One wears a black leather vest and sports a gray beard, the other wears a stained white T-shirt, with his hair pulled back in a ponytail.
If my companions were anyone else, I’d likely be trembling at the sight, but they’re not. And it’s only a matter of time before these strangers find that out.
“Drop the blade, friend,” the one in the leather vest says, but Titus doesn’t comply.
Huffing, Cadmus stands up, his naked body completely on display while he searches the truck, presumably for his clothes.
“’The fuck do you think you’re doing?” Leather Vest points a gun toward Cadmus, who casually bends forward to swipe up his pants from the floor, unruffled by the weapon.
“I’d rather not have my dick hanging out when I kill you,” he says, his voice still affected by the peyote in the minor slur of his words as he slips his leg into his pants. Not much, though—most of the drug will have already left his system, as it typically doesn’t last long for him, which I suspect has to do with his size.
One of them lurches toward the truck, coming up behind Titus. “I suggest you release my friend, so the pretty lady doesn’t have to watch your brains splatter all over the back of this truck.”
“We’re looking for the Skulls. Where can we find them?” Titus asks, keeping his blade on the first stranger’s throat, his gaze locked straight ahead.
“I’m not at liberty to say,” Leather Vest answers and racks the chamber of his gun. “Now, I told you to release my friend.”
Cadmus steps toward them, and the third man, in the ponytail, raises his gun, halting the Alpha in his tracks.
“We don’t want to hurt anyone. Answer the question, and we’ll be on our way.” There’s a cold, dark nature to Titus that bleeds through in his voice, and I feel compelled to warn these men what they’re dealing with, but I don’t.
Leather Vest chuckles and shakes his head. “Shithead, you got two guns on you right now. Only one getting hurt is you and your friend. I don’t answer to Legion.”
I’d say it’s a sure bet they’re members of the rebels, and damn that small flicker of hope that beats inside my chest again.
“We’re not Legion,” Titus answers, as still as a statue while he holds the first stranger captive.
“Soldier. Truck.” Leather Vest leans to the side and waves his gun. “Whatever shit’s in those silver boxes.”
Nothing is in them now, but there were mutations that would’ve ripped through whatever hive is hidden here, sniffing them out before they realized the monsters were there.
In the next breath, Titus twists around, keeping the blade to his captive’s throat, while knocking the gun from Leather Vest’s hands. He hammers a kick to his chest that sends the man flying back into Ponytail behind him. A gun fires off, pinging against the truck, and I startle, falling to the side to keep from getting hit by a stray bullet.
It all happens in a matter of seconds, and when it ends, Titus is holding a gun on the men, with the blade still propped at the first stranger’s throat.
“Getting slower, old man.” Cadmus hops down from the truck, and another shot just misses him, before he swipes the gun out of Ponytail’s hand and slams his knuckles into the man’s cheek.
Effortless.
“Now, you’re going to answer my friend’s question about the Skulls, or I’m going to put a bullet in yours before knocking it clean off your shoulders. Friend.” Unlike Titus, there’s an air of amusement in Cadmus’s threats that one could almost mistake for lack of being serious.
He aims the gun at Ponytail’s leg and fires a shot. A wail of agony follows, and that’s where Cadmus’s amusement ends.
He kneels down beside the man, gripping his throat. Head tipped, Cadmus seems to find intrigue in the turning shades of the man’s face. Red. Purple. Ponytail opens his mouth, tongue hanging out uselessly, and when his friend lurches toward Cadmus, the Alpha doesn’t bother to look, before his arm is outstretched, the barrel of his gun pressed into Leather Vest’s forehead.
Choked gasps chime the few seconds before Ponytail will be strangled to his death.
“Okay! Okay, the Skulls … they went east.”
“Where?” Cadmus doesn’t relent, and the veins popping in Ponytail’s forehead show his body’s struggle for air.
“Route Sixty-Six. Toward Florida.”
“When?” The Alpha’s questions are as flat as his concern seems to be about ending Ponytail’s life.
“Left early yesterd
ay morning.”
Releasing Ponytail sends the shades of purple back below his skin, and he collapses to the side, gasping for breath like a fish on the shore. Cadmus twists toward Leather Vest, still holding the gun to his forehead. “And how do I know you’re not lying to us to protect your friends?”
“They ain’t no friends of ours. Bastards lost their balls letting some bitch run the show. I don’t follow a bitch’s orders.”
“Still, maybe I should tie you and your friends to the hood of our vehicle and take you with us. Or …” Cadmus draws the gun down the man’s face, running the barrel over the loose flesh beneath his bearded chin, which lifts when he props it there. “Watch your bones explode out the top of your head. I’m sure your buddy over there wouldn’t attempt to bullshit me after that.”
“I ain’t lying.” His lips stretch to a smile as he stares back at Cadmus. “See, I know what waits for you there, asshole. And I would love to be a fly on the wind to see that fight.”
“The Alpha?” Cadmus lowers the gun and pushes to his feet, tucking the weapon into his pants. “It might interest you to know we share the same blood.”
Realization dawns on his face, and he glances back toward Titus, then to his friend, still gasping beside him.
“We’re practically brothers. And so long as he gives us what we want, we won’t have to kill him, along with the rest.”
“What do you want with them?”
“They’re our ticket inside Calico. We’re going to have them open the doors.”
Leather Vest leans back from Cadmus, his brows pinching to a frown. “Are you batshit crazy? Open the doors of Calico? You might as well kill us all now!”
Shrugging, Cadmus reaches for the gun in his waistband again.
“Cadmus!” I lurch forward, catching sight of his grin fading to disappointment. “Don’t. We’re not here to hurt anyone.”