by Kerry Kaya
“Don’t tell him that I’m here, please.” Karen whispered. “Promise me, Jake.”
“I promise.” With those parting words, Jake darted into his own bedroom to change his clothes.
Sliding the chest of drawers back into position, Karen leaned her back against them and allowed hot, salty tears to roll down her cheeks. How had this happened? How could her life have changed so dramatically, seemingly overnight?
* * *
With her hand clutching her husband’s hand tightly, Stacey had positioned herself so her back was turned away from the hospital room door and window. For most of the day, she had managed to avoid eye contact with the staff and had no desire to either see or speak to the doctors responsible for Tommy’s care, despite their protests that they needed to arrange an urgent meeting with her and the rest of the family to discuss the future, Tommy’s future.
As far as she was concerned, the doctors’ bedside manners needed working on. They hadn’t been able to fool her, and hiding behind their pitiful smiles, she knew exactly what they wanted to talk about. They wanted to switch off the life support machine that kept her husband alive. Well, over her dead body they would.
She wrinkled up her nose and recalled just how much Tommy had disliked hospitals. It was the unmistakable scent of disinfectant and sickness that had got to him, and as she glanced around the sterile room, she could see his point.
“We’ll have you out of here in no time, babe.” She gave a weak smile and gently squeezed his limp hand in hers. More than anything, she willed her husband to squeeze her hand back in return. There was nothing, not even a flicker. Her heart plummeted, and she closed her eyes tightly. Jake’s arrival was bound to get a reaction from her husband. It had to; she was counting on it.
* * *
As usual, Mad Dog Harris was sitting alone in the café of Oldchurch Hospital. He knew by rights that he should go home. This was family business, and he, better than anyone, knew exactly what family meant to Tommy Carter. No, he would sit it out, he decided. After all, he had been more of a father figure to the younger man than his own father had been, throughout the twenty years he’d known him.
He rubbed his hand across his face. Where was Frank Carter? That was the question he wanted answered. Where exactly was the no-good cunt? Not once had the man paid his critically ill son a visit. He blew out his cheeks and erased from his mind the fact that there was nothing he would love to do more, than to drag the man to the hospital, by his bollocks, if need be. Lord knows he himself would have been as proud as punch to have had a son like Tommy.
In front of him was a lukewarm cup of tea, and he lifted the cup to his lips before grimacing and placing it back onto the rickety table. He’d drank so many cups of tea over the past few days that he physically couldn’t stomach another sip to pass his lips.
Silently, he looked around him, watching the comings and goings. He smiled to himself as he watched a young father proudly carrying a new-born infant in a baby carrier, while his wife trailed slowly behind him, holding aloft several latex balloons announcing to the world the safe delivery of a baby boy.
The smile slipped from his face. What was that saying? He wracked his brain, trying to think. That was it! A life lost is another gained. His thoughts immediately went to Tommy and his heart lurched. They couldn’t lose him, not now, not yet. He was still a young man and should, by rights, have years ahead of him.
The arrival of Jimmy and young Jake had him easing his weary body out of the seat. So, Jimmy had somehow managed to locate the lad and bring him home. That would hopefully put a smile on Stacey’s face, and gawd knows, she needed something to make her smile.
“Uncle Mad Dog.” Jake Carter flung himself into the elder man’s arms. “Have you seen my dad?”
Mad Dog shook his head. “Not yet, lad, but I will do soon.” He lifted his eyes to look across to Jimmy. “Any problems?” he asked, referring to the fact that young Jimmy had gone to collect his nephew.
Rolling his eyes, Jimmy was in two minds. Just how much should he reveal? Where exactly would he even begin? “It’s sorted,” he finally answered, nodding his head toward Jake.
Mad Dog breathed a sigh of relief. He wouldn’t ask questions and he had a feeling Jimmy was counting on that. The boy was home; that was all that mattered.
“Can I see my dad now?”
“Yeah.” Jimmy looked in the direction of the Intensive Care Unit and sighed. On the car journey to the hospital, he had warned young Jake that his father was not only covered in drips and tubes, but also surrounded by bleeping machines that kept him alive. If he was being totally honest, he dreaded walking onto the unit. The fear of the unknown—the thought of what he might be walking into—scared him shitless. He turned his attention back to Mad Dog, thankful for a few minutes reprieve before it was time to face the music. “You look done in. Why don’t you get yourself off home and have a few hour’s kip?”
“No, lad.” Mad Dog shook his head and sat down once again. “I won’t rest if do that. I need to be here; I need to be close, just in case.”
“Yeah.” Jimmy blew out his cheeks for a second time. “Come on then,” he said, placing his hand on Jake’s shoulder. “Let’s go and see your dad.” He gave Mad Dog a sad smile and began the short walk toward the Intensive Care Unit.
* * *
Stacey rose from her chair. She pulled her youngest son into her arms and held on for dear life. Tears slipped down her cheeks as she felt his arms wrap around her slim body.
“I’m sorry, Mum.”
Stacey shook her head, silencing him. “No need to apologise; you’re home now, that’s all that matters.” She released him and looked into his eyes. “Just don’t ever scare me like that again, okay? Promise me, Jake. I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you, too.”
Jake nodded his head. “I promise.” He tore his eyes away from her and turned to look at his father. His breath caught in his throat and tears instantly formed in his eyes.
“He’ll be okay.” Stacey forced herself to sound a lot more cheerful than she actually felt. “It’s like your nanna said, he just needs to rest. We’ll have him out of here in no time.”
Jake looked across to his uncle for confirmation.
Standing back slightly, Jimmy gave a slight shake of his head. No matter how much they might want Tommy to wake up, it wasn’t going to happen.
Jake’s shoulders quivered as he turned back to his father. “I never told him that I love him,” he sobbed.
“He knows.” Stacey threw her arms around her son to console him. “He knows, and when he wakes up, you can tell him yourself.”
Clearing his throat, Jimmy spoke. “I’ll leave you both to spend some time with him,” he said, gesturing toward the door. There was only so much he could take without wanting to break down himself. “I’ll be back in a few hours.”
Stacey nodded her head. She grasped hold of her brother-in-law’s hand tightly. “Thank you for bringing my boy home.”
“No need to thank me.” Jimmy gave her a weak smile and left the room. Once outside, he watched through the window as they grasped hold of his brother’s hands in theirs. There and then, he had to fight the overwhelming urge to not fall to pieces. He couldn’t deal with this. He didn’t know how to deal with it, that was the truth of the matter.
* * *
Two hours later, he found himself in the only place he knew he would find some peace and quiet, the scrapyard office. Sat behind the desk in Tommy’s chair, he could see why his brother spent so much of his time holed up here. He held his head in hands and welcomed the solitude. Tears welled in his eyes. The pain of his brother’s impending fate that he’d held in for so long began to bubble to the surface, and there and then, he broke down.
He allowed himself to get it all off of his chest, then swiped the tears away, angry for not staying stronger. He lay his head on his arms and closed his eyes. The enormity of the situation consumed him. His elder brother was fighting one of his big
gest fights, a fight that even he could see he would not be the victor of.
“Thought I might find you here.”
Jimmy looked up and rubbed at his temples wearily. “What do you want, Gary?”
Gary gave him a small smile and rubbed at his own temples, mirroring his brother’s actions. “I want to help,” he finally answered. “I think we should call a truce. Us being at each other’s throats is only going to hinder the situation, isn’t it? You were right. No matter what may have happened between us, Tommy is still my brother.”
Sitting up straight, Jimmy chewed on the inside of his cheek. He was more than wary of his younger brother’s intentions, and he watched him closely through hooded eyes.
“So, tell me what I can do to help the family?”
“There ain’t nothing you can do, is there? It is what it is, and we have to deal with it. We have to pick up the pieces.”
“Is he gonna make it?”
Jimmy shook his head sadly. “You already know the answer to that question, as do I.”
Gary had to hide the grin that threatened to spread across his face. He looked around him. His eyes fell upon the filing cabinets. The bottom drawer had been locked when he’d searched the office. He wondered briefly if Jimmy had the key.
Following his brother’s gaze, Jimmy shook his head. “I don’t have the key, Gary, if that’s what you’re going to ask.” He watched Gary’s reaction closely. The truth was, he had the keys to every one of Tommy’s businesses, not that Gary would find anything in the bottom drawer. It was empty. The metal runners were faulty, and having grown sick and tired of slamming the drawer closed, Tommy had locked it.
Gary screwed up his face. “I wasn’t even going to ask about the keys.”
Jimmy raised his eyebrows, but kept schtum all the same. He leaned back in his seat and blew out his cheeks. “It’s Mum who worries me the most. She’s going to fall to pieces when he …” He cleared his throat not wanting to say the words out loud. “… when he dies.”
Resisting the urge not to shrug his shoulders, Gary sat down opposite his brother. He’d known all along that Tommy was her favourite. “She’ll be okay; she still has us.”
“Yeah.” Jimmy stared out of the office window. He hadn’t expected Gary to understand. He knew for a fact that his brother was unable to process emotions, at least not in the way normal people did.
“I’ve been thinking about it, and I think we should carry on as normal, keep the businesses going. It’s what Tommy would want.”
“Yeah.” Jimmy could see Gary’s point. Tommy wouldn’t want the businesses to come to a halt. “Okay,” he said, turning to look at his brother. “As of tomorrow, it’s back to business as usual.” He stood up. “I should get back to the hospital.”
“Is Mad Dog still there?”
Jimmy nodded his head. “I wish he would get off home and get some rest. He must be shattered.”
“You know what a stubborn bugger he is.” Gary clapped his hand on his brother’s shoulder as they headed toward the door. “Let me know if there is any news.”
“Yeah, I will do.” Jimmy watched as Gary walked across the yard to his car and let out a long sigh. What a turnaround. It was almost as though his younger brother had had a personality transplant. Well, whatever was the cause of Gary’s good mood, it was certainly refreshing to see.
* * *
There was a method to Gary’s madness. He drove out of the scrapyard with a sly grin spread across his face. Instead of driving home, he flicked the indicator as he turned onto the A13. If he put his foot down, he could be in Soho within thirty minutes.
After giving the matter a lot of thought, he’d come to the conclusion that the deeds must be in the Soho club. It was the perfect place for his elder brother to hide them away, and with Mad Dog still sitting up the hospital, maintaining his vigil, there was no one there to stop him from having a rummage around.
He switched on the radio and began to hum along to the music. More than anything, he couldn’t wait to see Bethany’s face, when he returned with the deeds that she so desperately wanted to get her hands upon.
* * *
“Please, will you just get yourself off home and rest?” Jimmy’s voice took on a pleading tone.
Mad Dog shook his head. “I can’t do that, lad.”
“Yes, you can. And Lil must be going out of her mind with worry.” He could see the older man thinking through his words. “I promise to give you a call if anything happens.”
“Aye, lad.” Mad Dog looked toward the Intensive Care Unit, thinking it over. He had to admit, he was feeling shattered. A couple of hours of shut-eye was exactly what he needed. He wiped his hand across the grey stubble covering his jawline. “You’ll call me straight away, if something happens?”
“Of course I will.”
Reluctantly, Mad Dog nodded his head. He hated to admit defeat, but he was feeling done in. “Fair enough, lad, I’ll get myself off home for a bit.”
“Good.” Jimmy pulled him into a bear hug and then watched as the elder man began to walk toward the exit.
“Don’t forget to give me a call,” Mad Dog called out.
“I won’t,” Jimmy answered. He gave a sad smile, then made his own way to see his brother.
* * *
Climbing inside his car, Mad Dog glanced down at his wristwatch. He’d go to the Soho club and collect his Lillian for a spot of lunch before going home and having a sleep. He couldn’t recall the last time he had actually eaten a meal. For the past few days, he’d lived on mugs of tea and limp egg and cress sandwiches.
He started the ignition and drove out of the car park. He was eager to see his partner of over twenty years, and knew instinctively, she would be just as worried as he himself was. After all, Tommy was the son they had never had.
* * *
Lillian Chambers was in her usual spot behind the reception desk when Gary Carter strolled in.
“Hello, darling.” She gave him a wide smile, masking the fact that his behaviour had always scared her in the past.
Gary came to a halt beside the desk. He leaned his forearms across the chrome and glass counter. “Anyone here with you?” he asked, turning his head to look through the club doors.
Following his gaze, Lillian shook her head. She took a step backwards, maintaining a reasonable distance between them. She had never felt completely comfortable in his company.
He reminded her of a ticking time bomb, ready and waiting to explode. More than anything, it was his eyes that frightened her the most; there was no emotion in them, whatsoever. “No, but Mad Dog will be here soon.”
He gave a wide smile and knew for a fact that the mad Scotsman was still at the hospital. Lillian noted that the smile didn’t quite reach his eyes and she gave a little shudder.
“He’ll be back soon,” she repeated.
“We both know that’s a little pork pie.” He grinned and pushed himself away from the counter. “I’ve come to collect something for Jimmy actually. Is the office open?”
“Yes, I think so.”
“Good.” He began to walk away, then abruptly came to a halt and jabbed his forefinger in her direction. “Oh, and I think it would be better if we kept my being here between ourselves, don’t you? It can be our little secret, if you like?” He gave the older woman a wide smile.
Lillian nodded her head. To say she was frightened was an understatement. She breathed a sigh of relief once he had walked through to the club. The quicker Gary Carter collected what he needed and then left again, the better, as far as she was concerned.
* * *
Mad Dog Harris pulled his car up outside the club. He took a deep breath, exhaled loudly, and then wearily stepped out of the car. He was done in and felt more than a little bit pleased that Jimmy had finally persuaded him to go home for a bit.
He crossed the street and pushed open the heavy door to the club. Lillian walked from around the counter to greet him.
“How is he?” she as
ked.
Mad Dog shook his head. “No change, lass.” He pulled her into his arms and held on tight, savouring the feel of her soft body against his.
“Gary is here.” She kept her voice low and glanced behind her at the club door. “He turned up about twenty minutes ago. He’s in the office.”
Mad Dog narrowed his eyes. Immediately, he was suspicious. He could feel his body involuntarily stiffen. Wherever Gary went, trouble was sure to follow.
“He said he was collecting something for Jimmy,” she added.
“I’ve just seen Jimmy and he didn’t mention anything to me.” He released her and began to move forward.
“Be careful,” Lillian warned. “I don’t trust him.”
Rolling his eyes, he gave her a wide grin. “I can still take care of myself. You should know that, lass.”
“I know.” Lillian returned his smile and made her way back around the counter. She would never have said it out loud, for fear of sounding like a silly old fool, but boy was she glad that her old man had turned up when he had.
Mad Dog weaved his way through the main floor. The smile he’d plastered across his face for Lillian’s benefit was gone. What the fuck was Gary doing here? He pushed open the door and wasn’t in the least surprised to see Gary ransacking the office.
“What are you doing?” His tone was loud and harsh. “Does Jimmy know that you’re here?”
Straightening up, Gary sighed with irritation. He’d put money on it that the old bat in the reception had called the Scotsman and told him he was here. “What does it look like?” he growled. “And to answer your question, my being here is fuck all to do with Jimmy.”