by Ruby Keller
Oliver rubbed my back. “You can come here whenever you want to talk to him, to tell him what’s new in your life or just to go down the memory lane.”
“Thank you for being here with me.” I looked at them both. “I don’t know if I could’ve done it alone. And thank you for making me do this, Oliver. Clayton would’ve been mad at me for not visiting him. I can remember him for the happy times we’ve had together, all thanks to you.”
“Of course.” Oliver smiled as I led them back to the car.
When we were all in the car and ready to go, Oliver turned around and looked at me in the back seat. “This might sound crazy, but do you want to meet Clayton’s parents? You clearly have some things to say to them and while they might not want to listen, it might be nice to get things off your chest, in a calm and rational way of course.”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged. “But if you think it helps, then I’d be willing to give it a try. But what if his father tries to beat me up?”
“I won’t let it come to that, trust me,” he said with a smirk. “We’ll be out of there the moment I sense verbal or physical altercation. Besides, have you looked at me? Anyone who wants to hurt my men has to go through me.”
He just called me his man out in the open. I turned to look at Elijah, who didn’t seem to be surprised at all. Did he already suspect that his Daddies were into each other?
“I trust you, Oliver,” I said slowly. “I’d go through fire if I had my men standing with me.”
He smiled. “You’ll be glad you said yes, but let me warn you. You can’t expect them to change. People fear what they don’t understand, and sometimes not even a gay son is enough to change their views.”
I guided him to the other end of the city where they lived and when reached, we walked up to the porch together holding hands. I would’ve preferred to keep Elijah far away from such a tense situation, but I trusted Oliver when he said he wouldn’t let any harm come to his men.
I took a deep breath and rang the doorbell. When it opened, Julia, Clayton’s sister, stood in the doorway. She stood there in shock for a few seconds but then threw her arms around me. She was the only reasonable one in the family. She supported Clayton when he had come out to her.
“I can’t believe you’re here, Mr. Hoult.” She broke the hug and stepped aside. “Please, come in.”
“Shouldn’t you ask your parents before letting us in?” I stepped in and looked around. It looked just the same as it did years ago.
“Please, have a seat.” She waited for us to sit on the couch before running upstairs and returning with her parents, who froze when they saw us.
“I know, it was a spur of the moment kind of decision to come here,” I said as they took seats. Julia ran back upstairs and left us alone.
“What is it that you want?” his mother said, shifting her gaze between the three of us as if we were beneath her.
“You know you’re not welcome here.” His father scoffed. “I thought we made that clear.”
“I’m here to get things off my chest,” I said with my head held high. “I’m sure you have things you’ve wanted to say to me too. After all, I was your son’s boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend.” He scoffed again. “Men can’t have a boyfriend. You were nothing but a sinful distraction.”
I cleared my throat and raised my voice. “What you did to Clayton was cruel, threatening to kill him and then disowning him when he came out to you. You should’ve accepted him for who he was. How can you claim to love him when you continue to ignore such a big part of his life? Even when it’s religion how can you choose anything over your son?”
He shook his head before speaking loud and stern. “No, it wasn’t a part of his life. He was on the devil’s path and it was our duty to show him that. He would’ve come back to us after realizing his sins and finding his way back to God. We prayed for it to happen day and night.”
“We sure did,” she said. “Our prayers would’ve been answered but the lord had different plans for him.”
“Do you listen to yourself?” I almost shouted. “He was in such distress all his life because you chose religion over your son, and you’re doing it all over again, even in his death. You don’t have to choose. You can be religious and love your son at the same time.”
“Don’t you talk about loving our son!” She looked like she was about to start screaming any second. “You were the one who took him away from us. He was a God-fearing man before you came into his life and confused him. You turned him gay.”
“He was at a gay club when I first saw him,” I said. “He was gay long before he met me.”
“Lies!” he said with bloodshot eyes. “Our son would never visit a gay establishment. We didn’t raise him to be a sinner.”
“Even if it were true, he must’ve been confused,” she said. “He was young after all, and you confused him even more.”
“It was also very cruel of you to ban me from the funeral. We loved each other and it was unfair.”
“How could we not? You were the man who influenced him with your sinful ways. We wanted to remember him for the good son he was.”
They wanted to remember parts of him they liked and ignore the parts they didn’t. Oliver was right when he said nothing could change them. Clayton’s views were so different from theirs. It must’ve been hard living under their roof and trying to live up to their heteronormative expectations.
I took a deep breath and stood up. “We were days away from getting married and he had planned on inviting you. He was sad because he knew you wouldn’t come, that you’d miss such an important event in his life. He was willing to forgive you despite the hatred you’ve shown. So big was his heart that he wanted you to be a part of his life even after the things you did to him. I wish you could’ve seen him through my eyes. All I saw was love, innocence, and kindness, not an ounce of sin. I hope you realize one day that you were the sinners, not him. You never got to know the real Clayton, because you never let him be himself. I did, and I’m honored to have known your son. I’ve said everything I’ve come here to say, so goodbye.”
Turning around, I nodded at my men and they followed me out the door.
"Are you okay?" Oliver said as he started the car.
"Yeah, it feels good to get it off my chest." I smiled.
Chapter 10: Oliver
I looked out the bedroom window at the setting sun, the sky turning a bright red as birds chirped in the distance. It was beautiful views like these that made me realize how peaceful it was to live in the woods. It had been a few days since Lance visited Clayton's grave and he already seemed to be in a much better mood. There weren't sudden bouts of sadness or running off into the woods without telling us.
I was beginning to regret my decision of not telling Elijah about my feelings for Lance. It was hard to keep how I felt a secret. I was a very physically affectionate person so I found myself reaching out for Lance from my instinct, but I had to keep reminding myself that we couldn't show affection in our boy's presence. On the other hand, I was too scared of losing Elijah. What if he didn't want his Daddies to be together? Would we stay away for his sake or would we defy his wishes? I loved Elijah but the thought of letting Lance go terrified me.
When I put down the book I was reading and paced around the room, Lance walked in looking nervous. Elijah was watching a nature documentary out in the living room.
"We need to talk, Oliver." He closed the door behind him. "It's important."
"Sure, what's up?" I sat on the bed and motioned for him to sit next to me. "Are you feeling okay?"
"Yeah, I've been feeling much better." He sighed and held onto my hand. "I've been thinking a lot about us lately, though. I have feelings for you and I want to see where it's going. I love our boy just as much as you do, but hiding from him isn't going to do us any good. Visiting the cemetery made me realize how short our lives are. We shouldn't spend it hiding who we are or how we feel. I like you and I don't want to hide it."
"I know what you mean." I put his hand up to my mouth and kissed it, wrapping my arms around him. "I've been rethinking the rules we've set. I feel like I might go mad if I don't get to touch you the way I want to."
"Then why don't we do something about it?" He frowned when I broke the hug. "Why don't we tell him?"
"Because I'm scared," I admitted after a pause. "I'm scared of losing our boy. He's just been through so much and he needs us. At the same time, I'm tired of what-ifs and being scared. He might not be ready but there's only one way to know for sure."
"But are we going to be fine if he doesn't take it well? What happens to us?"
I shrugged. "I simply don't know, but we'll figure it out as we go. Throuples are rare so we get to make our own rules. Let's just take it one step at a time though. He might be confused at first or have a lot of questions, so we'll have to hear out his concerns and ask him what he's comfortable with."
"This is really happening?" He smiled ear to ear. "We're telling our boy?"
"Yes." I gave him a quick peck on the lips and put my hand around his waist. "God, I've been wanting to do that for such a long time. Staying away from you has been challenging, but no more hiding how we feel from now on."
When I stood and held firmly onto his hand, his smile widened. Opening the door, we stepped out and I cleared my throat. Penguins on the screen were doing silly things as they usually did. Elijah stopped laughing, switched the TV off, and turned around. His smile faded as he stared at our joined hands for a few seconds before looking up at our faces. With his eyes fixed on our hands, he stood before us.
When Lance looked at me with an arched eyebrow, I nodded. "There's something we need to tell you, sweetheart. You might want to sit down for this. Now, remember, no matter how you feel, it's important you know that we still love you just as much. You might be confused at first, so it's fine if you have a lot of questions."
"Why would I be confused? Oh... Good God, you both have been acting strange lately and I should've known." He covered his face with his hands and sighed before placing them on his hips. "It all makes sense now. One of you is dying, isn't it? Which one is it?"
"What?" I led Lance onto the couch and I patted my lap. "No one's dying! We're in perfect health."
He sat in our combined laps and wrapped a hand around each of us. "Then what is it, Daddy? You're scaring me."
"Well," I finally managed to say after the long silence that followed while he looked at us expectantly. "There's no easy way to say this. Nothing really scares me but this does, because I'm scared of losing you, honey."
"Okay." He blinked slowly and frowned, his grasp around us getting tighter.
"Your Daddies have feelings for each other, little one." I began stroking his hair. "We like each other and we'd like to see where it's going. We still love you just as much, so you have nothing to worry about."
He gaped as his gaze shifted between us and our joined hands, so Lance chimed in. "Your Daddy wanted to wait till you were ready, but I couldn't because the past few days have been hard trying to keep our distance. We knew you might not be ready but we were selfish in wanting to be a family. What's going on in your head, sweetheart? How do you feel?"
He suddenly jumped out of our laps and threw his fists up in the air. "Hurray, my dreams have come true!"
Lance and I looked at each other bewildered. When he sat back into our laps giggling, he continued. "Sorry, couldn't keep the excitement in. So, you were saying?"
"Sweetheart, does it not bother you?" Lance asked with a frown. "We expected you to have questions and worries. We were worried you'd think your love was not enough, or that we'd spend less time and love on you."
"Nope." He giggled again and placed his hand on our joined hands. "My Daddies are so silly. Why would I be scared of what I want? I've badly wanted us all to be a family for so long. It always felt like I was in two separate relationships, but I wanted us to be one."
I finally sighed in relief and smiled, letting go of their hands and throwing my arms around him. "We were so scared we'd lose you. We were prepared to stay away from each other in case you disapproved, and the thought was terrifying. So we've been losing sleep over nothing then?"
"Pretty much." He closed his eyes and put his forehead against mine. "You should've told me sooner if you were losing sleep over it. I would've told you what I wanted but Michael said I couldn't force people to develop feelings, that it'll happen if it was meant to be. But then why have you two been acting strange ever since Daddy Lance moved in? I couldn't tell whether you hated or liked each other."
When Elijah opened his eyes, Lance pulled him in onto his lap. "It was my fault, sweetheart. I was so anxious over Clayton's anniversary that I didn't want to deal with my feelings for your Daddy. I thought they'd go away if I just ignored him. Being a Daddy myself, I was confused if a Daddy could even like me back, or if it meant I wanted to be a boy or a switch. I'm not scared of labels anymore, so maybe time will tell what I am."
I put my arms around my men and pulled them closer in an embrace. I wished they would've come to me with their fears and worries, but now that we were about to be a family, I hoped that would happen more often.
"It would be nice to have a boy to play with if you decide you want to be one." He kissed Lance's cheek. "I can share my toys with you, even the ones at your mansion. I'll accept you for who you are, Daddy. There's no shame in wanting to be who you are."
"Aw, sweetheart." Lance kissed his cheek back, rocking back and forth. "Such a wise boy. That's nice of you, but I'm just a Daddy for now. I'll let you know if that changes, but I don’t think it will. Maybe two Daddies can like each other after all."
"One big family, huh?" I said. "I like the sound of that."
"I wish the bears were here too." He looked at the door, hoping they'd walk in any moment. "They're a part of our family."
"They sure are." I chuckled. "I'm sure you'll tell them everything that happened today the next time they visit."
I just loved the way he spoke to them like they could understand. He looked so cute scolding them to pay attention to his words when all they wanted was treats and belly rubs.
He blinked, bewildered. "Well, how else would they know?"
"While we're getting things off our chests, there's something else you should know." Lance's cheeks turned red and I knew what he was going to say. "While we wanted to wait until we told you to express our feelings…physically, it got hard to control ourselves. Before we knew it, one thing led to another and we jerked each other off."
His jaw fell open as he looked between us. "Not fair! Mean Daddies. I wasn't invited to watch?" Then he stuck his lower lip out in a cute pout.
I laughed, stroking his hair. "Would you have wanted to?"
"Heck yeah!" He threw his hands up as if we had to ask. "That would've been so hot to watch."
Lance chuckled. "Sorry, sweetheart. We'll invite you next time, promise. After all, good boys who wait get a lot of opportunities, and we have the best boy in the whole world."
"Yeah, I was kinda expecting something right now." He looked at us expectantly. "I told Michael I wanted to watch you kiss. It would make good fap material for my dirty fantasies."
I laughed and shook my head. "Using your Daddies for your jack-off fantasies? You're supposed to let us know when you have urges. What are Daddies for if not to take care of their boy's sexual needs."
When Lance opened his mouth to speak, I caught him by surprise by putting my hands on his face. When I stroked his cheek with a thumb, his face turned red.
Elijah gaped and watched in fascination, taking his stuffed bear off the ground and holding it in anticipation. "Wow, look at Daddy blush."
When I moved my face closer to his, he closed his eyes and I could tell he was aroused from the rapid breathing. I planted my lips onto his, kissing him gently and pushing my tongue into his mouth. He sucked onto it and put his hands on my back. Pulling him in closer, I ran a hand through his hair.
When I broke the kiss and pulled away, I turned around to see Elijah watching us wide-eyed from our laps.
He squeezed his stuffed bear tighter and almost squealed, the boner in his pants forming a tent. "That was the hottest thing I've ever seen. I could watch you go on for hours."
"Too bad we'll be late for the disco night at the club if we do that," Lance said and Elijah pouted.
I scooped him up in my arms and stood up. "Michael and John must be waiting for us, honey."
"Fine." He sighed and adjusted his boner. "But I better be invited to watch the next time."
"Just watch?" Lance teased as I carried him into the nursery. "We were planning on having you join us. After all, your Daddies are both tops. There's only so much two tops could do in bed."
"Yes, yes." He nodded frantically and wide-eyed as we laughed. "I'd love to help by joining in. You know me. I’m all about helping people."
After changing him into his little clothes, we drove to Michael’s house and picked him up along with John.
“You boys are okay back there?” Lance asked, sitting next to me and turning around as I started the SUV. They nodded and off we went to the club. John was in the backseat with them, watching the boys giggle and laugh as they caught up with one other.
When Elijah whispered something in Michael’s ear, Michael gasped. “No way! Really? You lucky boy.”
Then they giggled together and John said, “What’s with the giggling, boys? Let your Daddies in on your little secrets.”
I turned around briefly. “Oh, I was planning to announce it to you and Michael once we all sat down at the club, John. We have some news. Lance and I like each other and we want to see where it’s going.”
“Oh,” John said after a confused pause. “I didn’t know things were heading in that direction.”
“We didn’t either, John.” Lance shrugged. “But we’re glad they did because apparently, our boy wanted them to.”
Michael giggled and looked at John. “I knew it would eventually happen, Daddy. Elijah had already told me what he wanted, but I was being a good boy by keeping it a secret, even from you.”