Tierra was awakened by the unmistakable sounds of the rings on her curtains sliding across the metal rod.
“Brandon, I know you’ve gone and lost your mind!” she scorned, sleepily, yet sternly, thinking he must have gotten his days mixed up. She reached her hand out from under her pillow, searching for the alarm clock on her night stand.
“7:57AM?!” she yelled. “It’s Sunday, Brandon. I don’t have to go to the office today. What the hell are you doing here, anyway? Close those damn curtains, and go home!” she slid further under the blanket, awaiting the recurrence of darkness that was to follow Brandon immediately following her instructions. Instead, she heard the water running in her bathroom and the Quiet Storm playlist on her IPod playing.
“Brandon?” she stated, baffled that he was so blatantly ignoring her request. Not only that, but he has never entered her bedroom without permission, let alone ran her a bath before. She pulled the pillow off her head, and tossed it across the floor.
“Brandon is that you? What the hell are you doing?” There was no answer. When the alarm clock began to buzz, she jumped, grabbed it, and tossed it across the room. It too was in on the sinister plot to ruin her day off, she thought. A grin came over her face as it broke, smashing against the bottom drawer of her dresser. The once loud buzz now sounded like a wounded animal. Then it was silent.
“That’s not very lady like,” Nicole Rodriquez, said as she walked out of the bathroom, drying her hands on a hand towel.
Tierra quickly looked at her mother, in disbelief. She rubbed her eyes, taking a second look. Surely she was dreaming, she pinched herself to prove it.
“Ouch.”
“Sorry, you’re not dreaming. I’m really here Tierra. And, not a moment too soon I see. How long have you been angry with your alarm clock?” she offered a smile, as she walked over to the alarm clock and picked up the shattered pieces. “The poor thing never had a chance” she finished, tossing the pieces into the trash.
“Mama, h… how did you… when did you get here?” Tierra was more than confused. The better question though, was how did her mother get inside her condo?
“Well, Tierra, they are called planes and I ended up having to wake up Shireece and Sean. They kindly informed that very nice young man, Tony I think his name was, your desk clerk, that I was your mother. After he rang you and received no answer, he let me in. I hope you don’t mind?
Tierra was speechless. She was stuck, motionless, and emotionless. She figured her Abuela must have told her mother about their conversation last week. More than likely her mother took some time off of work and was here to lecture her about the whole situation. She was ready for it. She had been preparing for this day for eighteen years.
“Mom, before you start yelling at me, can I just say that I’m sorry? I know that I wasn’t where I was supposed to be and that everything that happened was all my fault and…” she began. She was sitting up in the center of her bed, with her head lowered into the small pocket her bent knees made in the fury comforter.
“Hush mi amor,” Nicole whispered, sitting down next to her daughter on the bed. She cupped Tierra’s head with both her hands, and looked lovingly into her eyes. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Those men were the ones that were wrong. You were a child, baby. What they did to you was unforgivable, and vile. There is no way it could ever be your fault. Whoever told you it was your fault?” she asked reaching for her daughter’s hand.
Tierra wanted to accept the gesture from her mother, but was unable to let go of her knees. She closed her eyes, “No one told me it was my fault. I never told anyone. I just figured that… I mean, they said God sent me to them, they thanked me momma!”
“Shhhh… Tierra I know you were young but, how could you think that I would have been upset with you? Your welfare, your safety, is always going to be my main concern. I would have been angry with those men. I would have done something to make sure they never hurt you or anyone else ever again. I never, not for one second would have said it was your fault,” Nicole took a breath before she continued, “Can I ask you a question?”
Tierra nodded her head.
“Do you think I allowed this to happen to you?”
Tierra looked up at her mother with amazement in her eyes. “What?! No Mama, I know you didn’t let it happen to me. You can’t stop everything from happening…”
“Then why do you hold God responsible for what those men did to you? They were not sent by God, nor were you a present from him to them. You’ve got to believe me,” she wiped the tears that fell from her daughter’s eyes and pulled her close to her. “You’ve been angry all this time, and you’ve turned away good people in your life, including me and God, because of something that was beyond any of our control. Can’t you see that?”
Tierra sat quietly. She didn’t know what to say. She spent more than half her life being mad at anyone, and everyone who showed her any kind of love. Anyone who dared to show her any type of affection was deemed the enemy. After all, she needed someone to be mad at. She was mad at her mother, at God, and herself. But in that moment, she realized she never turned her anger towards the men that actually hurt her. She never even considered them. She stupidly believed she was their gift. A child’s mistake, had she talked to someone, she would have been informed differently.
Nicole wiped her daughter’s face and then cradled her in her arms. Tierra cried harder than she ever had before, as she released herself to her mother’s love. She unsteadily accepted the love of her mother for the first time in over ten years.
“Baby, go take a shower and get dressed. I’m going to take you somewhere,” her mother smiled, pointing towards the bathroom.
“Where…?” Tierra asked hesitantly, noticing the grin on her mother’s face.
“Church…”
“Church… ?”
Truth Is
Aquarian was happy that he was able to reconnect with Tierra. He missed the connection that the two of them shared. It was almost like they were two halves of a whole. She was the only person that ever really understood him. While he was in California, he met many a woman who claimed to be Christian women. Only after a few dates, he could tell if he tried, they would not object to sharing his bed. He wanted more than a physical attraction. He yearned for and prayed for a woman that would hold herself sacred, and make him wait. At least more than 4 dates!
Tierra on the other hand wasn’t into church. He wasn’t sure why. He remembered the days when she’s loved church, when she couldn’t get enough of church. That was before her father died though. The last time they talked about church, he invited her to come with him on his search for a church home and Tierra nearly bit his head off over the phone. He decided then and there, he’d leave that subject alone, at least for a while.
He sat on the end of his piano stool, in full view of I-91 North, the Connecticut River and the Basketball Hall of Fame… Actually, he could see two cities away from his hilltop view. His thoughts remained engulfed in Tierra, as his fingers played over the black and white keys. Thinking about her with Bella made him smile. He made a mental note to call her later, and make sure she was happy with his gift.
In the end it was a call back home he knew he really had to make. That call had him the most anxious. He picked up his cell phone off the piano and dialed his mother’s number.
“Ma, hey, hmm… it’s me Qu,” he sighed relieved he reached the answering machine. “I know you’ve been trying to reach me for several days, well, over several weeks now. I’m sorry I haven’t returned any of your calls. I just needed some time to get my thoughts together. I’m in the city, getting settled into my new place and all. I found Tierra, as I’m sure you’ve heard by now. I’m glad I listened to Beautiful. I don’t think I could be making it through this without her. Don’t be mad, but please have Dad call me as soon as you get this. My number here is 909-555-5555. I love you Mom, and yes, I went to church.”
He ended the call, returning the phone to its resting place atop the piano. T
hough a few weeks had passed, it was still hard. He just found her. She just found him. Now, she was gone forever and it wasn’t fair.
Beautiful Page 17