by Olivia Chase
I see it now.
For the first time, I’m ready to truly let this place go. To move toward my own happiness and not obsess over what was in the past. Things are never going to be what they were. And that’s a positive. They shouldn’t be. My brothers realized it before I did…this place isn’t good for us.
If I’m going to grow, I have to let the past go and evolve.
Time for me to move out. Move forward. I spend the next few days packing, clearing my shit out of there. Deciding what I want to take with me into my new place.
I was one of the last in the neighborhood to sign, and Charles sends me a message when the last holdout is gone. They’re ready to move forward with building the mall now.
On demolition day, I can’t help but be here, watch the neighborhood as it’s ripped down and changed into something else.
Charles claps a hand on my shoulder. “You did the right thing,” he says, giving me a nod of respect. “I know this was hard, but your future is going to be great.”
“It had better,” I joke. “You’re destroying the place I used to live.”
The man on the large demolition equipment rolls through, and the neighborhood is being ripped down before I realize it. Flattened. Soon enough, there’s nothing but rubble on my street staring at me. I can hardly believe it. Years gone in a flash.
But I’m the only one here looking at it. Everyone else took the deal and left this place behind.
“Take care of the old place,” I tell Charles.
“I will,” he promises.
There’s a respect between us now. We both lost Kendra, and we’re both suffering for it. I know he didn’t intend for it to go that far, and he’s clearly regretful. That much is evident, given by his dealings with me now.
I watch the demolition for a few more minutes, and then I walk away. I have more to worry about now than the past. I have my future ahead of me.
Kendra
“We should be wild,” Michelle is saying to me. “You’re too boring. Let’s go get tattoos.”
“No,” I protest without thinking. I can’t step into a parlor; it’s going to remind me of what I left behind, what’s missing from my life. Axel.
“But this place looks awesome,” she says, pointing to the shop we’re about to pass.
When I see the name on the storefront, I feel like I might faint.
My world begins spinning.
Beckett Tattoos. That’s what the sign says.
It’s a swanky joint, with amazing artwork decorating the exterior. I can see through the massive glass windows that the interior is just as thoroughly decorated. Different examples of tattoos cover the walls, and there are several people crowded in the lobby, waiting to get ink.
I can’t believe what I’m seeing. The joint is clearly popular. Axel made his dream come true—he has his own tattoo shop, and it’s successful.
“Let’s go in,” Michelle says. I can tell by the way she’s looking at me that she must have intended to bring me here.
Maybe she wants me to conquer my demons, maybe she thinks it will help me climb out of my depression and sadness over losing him. But she’s wrong.
“I can’t,” I protest, turning away. Axel is in my past, despite how much my body and my heart aches for him. I can’t do this—can’t be the bigger person, pretending like I never had feelings for the man. When he told me I was nothing more than a complicated one-night stand, it broke me.
“Don’t be silly,” she says, grabbing my hand and tugging me inside.
I lean away from her, removing my hand from her death grip, and look around. The place is amazing, just as Axel said it would be. Artistic, filled with pieces that draw my interest. Good music flooding through the sound system. The artists he has working for him are at their stations, chatting amiably with customers, the buzz of tattoo machines filling the air.
I don’t belong here. This is his place. My heart lurches, and suddenly I want to leave. I can’t be here. It makes me feel too much. Miss too much. I wanted to help him get this place going. And he did…without me.
“I…gotta go,” I tell Michelle blindly, and I fumble for the door.
“Kendra,” a husky voice says, stopping me in my tracks.
I close my eyes for a moment, then turn around, heart sunk all the way to my feet. I didn’t actually think I’d see him.
Everything fades away as he walks toward me. He looks as beautiful and sexy and compelling as he did before, and it’s so fucking unfair. He should be as destroyed as I feel. Should be busted and miserable. But there’s life in his eyes that I haven’t seen before, and it almost hurts to look at him, like trying to stare at a solar eclipse.
He’s brilliant, glorious, and I’m hopeless.
He doesn’t touch me, just stands near me, peering down. “I wanted to contact you but I was waiting until the shop had its first fully profitable month and paid all of its debts back.” He pauses, and I see a smile crease his face. “That’s officially today.”
I’m so glad for him. So glad, but my heart aches so badly that I can’t speak to him. “I’m happy it worked out for you,” I say in a choked voice. I have to get out of here before I embarrass myself. Because I’m falling apart, and he’s going to see it, and it will just make me feel stupid. Axel is doing fine without me, that much is clear.
I spin on my heels and head toward the door. I can’t do this. It’s terrible, and selfish, but my whole body is screaming at me to get outside and run away before he can see how hurt I am, how much I miss him.
I shove the doors open and turn left, just stomping down the sidewalk without really paying attention to where I’m going.
“Kendra,” I hear him bark, and I find my feet stumbling to still, despite my brain screaming at me to go, go, go.
My gut tugs at me from the desperation in his voice; I slow in my path. His hand wraps around my forearm, and I force myself to spin toward him, even though seeing him makes my heart ache so badly that I want to cry.
“Kendra,” he whispers. His eyes are heavy with emotion. I don’t know what to think.
“I’m glad your business worked out,” I make myself say. It’s the least I can do. “Looks like you’re in a good spot.”
“Your father was the one who gave me the financing to start the place.”
Those words make me freeze in shock. “What?”
“We’ve actually become…friends.” Axel gives me a wry smile. “Which is ironic, since both he and I lost you.” He pauses, and then one hand is reaching up, hesitant, and brushes my jaw. “I’ve missed you so fucking much.”
My heart skips a beat at his words. So much has changed since I saw him—not just for me, but for him. I don’t know what to say.
“I missed you too,” I manage to choke out.
“Your father has missed you as well. You should give him a call. He’s not the same man he was.” He grabs my hand and clenches my fingers in his. I’ve never seen him so serious. His eyes are locked on mine.
When he drops to one knee, I’m so overwhelmed that I can’t even breathe.
“Kendra,” he says quietly. “I never stopped loving you.” He grips my fingers so tightly that I feel like he’s trying to draw me into him, as he continues. “I was fucked up in the head and I needed to get my shit clear. Which I did. Now everything is clear as day.” He looks up at me, and there’s so much love and worship in his eyes. “I fucking love you obsessively. I want you to be my wife. Please say yes. Be my partner, by my side. You’re the one who made be believe I could be better, and there’s no one else I’d rather spend my life with.”
I draw in a shattered breath. My emotions are running rampant in my heart. I want this man so badly, have missed him more than anything. And knowing that he’s felt the same? It blows me away. “Yes,” I say.
Axel rises to his feet and captures my face in his hands. Kisses me, reminds me what he feels like against me, sucks the breath from my lungs. I’m clinging to him, happy and relieved and in lo
ve as much as ever as I fall into his arms. I never knew love like I know it with him.
“I will never push you away again,” he murmurs against my mouth. “I was a fucking moron to let you go. But you’re here now, and I’m never letting you get away again.”
“Good,” I whisper back. “I don’t want you to.”
The kiss he sears me with penetrates to my soul. I never dreamed I could feel this strongly about a man. But I love him, more than anything. Axel is the man I always wanted in my life. And now he’s here, and he loves me.
I don’t know that my life could get any better.
Epilogue
Kendra
Axel comes up behind me and wraps his arms around me, nuzzles my neck. “God, I can’t get enough of your smell,” he says.
I arch into him, smiling. “That’s because you’re a slut,” I say sweetly.
He reaches up and grips my hair. “Oh, is that right?”
The flash of pain instantly makes me feel submissive. “God,” I breathe.
“I told you before,” Axel says, turning me toward him. Biting my collarbones until I squirm. “I’ll be any deity you want me to be.”
He leads me into our bedroom, pushes me onto the bed. Since he moved in with me last month, we’ve worked on integrating the apartment to make it his, too. But him owning me, possessing me right now? Yeah, that does it.
Axel strips my pants and shirt off. His gaze is hot and hard as he stares at me in my bra and panties. “Take them off,” he growls.
A small, bratty part of me is tempted to tell him to take them off me. But I’m so desperate for him that I don’t want any delay. I whip them off and lie before him, bared naked.
I want my beloved to see me this way. I want him to possess me.
“Kendra,” he breathes, dipping down to capture my nipple in his mouth. I sigh and arch toward him, dig my fingers into his hair. Oh God, the way he touches me, owns me, it drives me mad. I love the suction of his mouth on me, how his fingers search out my eager skin.
And he doesn’t disappoint. Minutes later, I’m vibrating beneath him, desperate for him to enter me. Almost begging him to.
When he slides deep in me, I can’t help the gasp of pleasure that escapes. I wrap my thighs around his waist and draw him deeper.
Our eyes lock, and every day, every minute, I fall more in love with him than I ever was before. The intensity between us is electric; I writhe against his body as he kisses me all over, nipping me with his teeth. But I want harder.
“Baby, please,” I beg as I tighten my grip in his hair.
“Mmmmm.” Axel pauses making love to me, his fingers sliding up to grip the back of my neck. He tugs so hard that I gasp. “My dirty girl needs to be fucked, doesn’t she?”
“Yes,” I whimper. I want to be a wanton, brazen woman for him.
Axel holds me close, almost painfully so, as he pumps into me. My pussy soaks around him, and I arch to him, begging him for more.
“Please,” I beg. It doesn’t matter what I’m begging for; I just want him to do what he wants to me.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Axel breathes as he leans down and clamps his teeth on my neck. I groan from the pressure and then keen as it grows in intensity and pain. Oh yes, I want him to do that all over. To claim me. Anyone who sees me will see his mark on me, know that I am his.
Soon my orgasm is building. He drops his hand down to stroke my cleft, my clit, and then I’m exploding on him as he bites on my collar bone. It’s intense and sexual and magnificent. A moment later, he’s coming in me, and we’re clenching each other, wrapped up in the intense moment.
After a few moments, we curl into each other, drawing in steadying breaths.
“That was amazing,” I say against his chest.
“Yes. Yes, it was,” he says. “If you worked with me, we could do that all the time.”
I bark out a laugh. He’s been not-so-seriously trying to convince me to work at the tattoo shop, but I told him no. I need to make my own way for a while, to forge my own path. At some point in the future, I’m sure it’ll make sense to work with him.
But not now.
So I kiss him on the brow and chuckle. “I love you, baby.”
He huffs an exaggerated sigh. “I just want you near me always.”
I know he’s teasing, but I also know he means it. The words wrap around me and make my heart skip.
He flips me around until my backside is cuddling against him. “You know your dad is planning my bachelor party, right?”
I chuckle. “I’m sure that’ll be fun.” Knowing my dad, it’ll probably be a night at the casino.
Sure enough, Axel says, “There won’t even be any strippers.”
“How sad,” I say with a mock gasp, wrapping his arm around me and kissing his forearm. “I’m sure you’ll get through it.”
I know he’s teasing; he’s commented about how glad he is that he and my father are becoming close. It makes my soul happy that my father and my fiancé are able to get along. Daddy and I have begun repairing our relationship, as well—since I’ve become independent, he’s started seeing me as more of his equal. It’s not a quick process, but our relationship is evolving.
Things could be worse. A fact I remind myself of every day.
But here I am, drifting off to sleep after the man I loved made passionate love to me. I’m one lucky woman.
“Kendra Rochester,” the elderly pastor says, looking hard at me. “Do you promise to take Axel as your husband, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, until death do you part?”
I peer up at the man in the suit who’s cupping my hands, the intensity of his love pouring from his eyes. “I do.”
The pastor smiles at us. “Then before God and these people, I now declare you man and wife. Axel, you may now kiss your bride.”
My heart gives a slow flip as my now-husband leans toward me and gives me a kiss that melts me down to my heels. When he pulls back, he whispers, “You look so fucking beautiful. I’m the luckiest man in the universe.”
“I love you,” I breathe against his mouth.
Our families are clapping like crazy, so we turn and face them, heading down the center aisle. I want to keep kissing him, but there’s time for that. He’s my husband now.
Holy shit. I’m married to Axel Beckett.
We take pictures, then go to our reception. The Beckett brothers and cousins are already in fine style, singing along with the music and waving at him as he enters. I laugh and shove him toward them. I’m so glad that he’s repaired his relationship with them.
The DJ plays some crazy song, and the brothers and cousins sing along, screaming it at the top of their lungs. I laugh and clap, and Michelle, my maid of honor, comes up beside me and wraps her arm around me.
“Those men are insane,” she declares. “I’ve never seen a wilder group of people.”
“Yes, they are,” I say. But I’m glad I married into this family. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Despite all the shit that happened between them over the last few years, they’re reunited now, all smiling and laughing in the middle of the dance floor. It might sound silly, but I’m glad our wedding brought them together. I know how hard Axel has tried to fit in with them, how much he felt left out.
But they’re all here, cutting it up and having a good time. I can hear them talking on the floor about their crazy vendettas of the past, their fights and heartbreak. No one is mad though; they’re laughing about how absurd shit got before they finally pulled their heads out of their asses.
The DJ puts on a slow song, and one by one, their women come up and claim their men, and they begin to sway on the floor. Axel eyes me and steps toward me, and I can’t help but move in his direction. I need him more than I need to breathe.
“I fucking love you,” he says as he draws me into his arms. I feel like a part of his family, and I lean toward him, loving that I’m now a Beckett.
“I love you too,” I whisper.
The Beckett code has lived on, even if he hasn’t realized it. I have though. I can look at my new family and I see the connection. The Becketts stand for family, for pride, and they’re here today, representing that very thing. The code has lived—it’s just changed with the times, and it’s better for it.
Axel cups my lower back and rains kisses on my face. “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says. “I can’t believe you’re mine.”
“And you’re mine too,” I whisper to him. “We belong to each other. As husband and wife, but also as family.” I glance over and see my dad smiling at me as I dance with my husband.
I didn’t lose anything. I gained so much more than I ever dreamed. And I never imagined that I could be so lucky as to marry into such an amazing, loving family.
THE END
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