by Measha Stone
It never would have worked with him. She was a novelty. A newbie. The shine would wear off and he'd be tired of her. Jonathan had tossed her aside when he grew tired of her, what would make her think Bradley wouldn't react the same way?
Claudia, as crazy as she was, had a point. He liked the training phase, he excelled at it, but once she was beyond that point, why would he keep her?
The only good thing that came out of having a mad woman abduct her was the clarity it brought to her already muddled thinking. She’d made the right decision. It had been the right thing to do.
Her phone beeped, signaling a reminder on her calendar. Looking at it, she sighed. She'd made an appointment with a trauma counselor at the insistence of her friends, but she really didn't need to go. Her nightmares weren't filled with visions of Claudia or even the dark sound of the horrible man who had been in the room.
She made a quick call to cancel the appointment, then called Alex to let him know she didn't need him to come over. He didn't sound convinced, but didn't give her much trouble over it. She would put the entertainment center together herself, or she'd just put her TV on the floor. Either way, it didn't matter, she just couldn't bring herself to be around anyone.
It was Saturday afternoon. She had plenty to keep her busy in her new apartment.
She could do this. She could go on alone. She didn't need Bradley or anyone else. She'd manage just fine on her own.
Her wracking sobs made a liar of her, but she let herself indulge as she lay down in her bed. She just needed an afternoon to sulk, then she'd be okay. Tears streaked her cheeks, her chest hurt, her throat burned. She'd be okay. Maybe one day she'd start believing her own lies.
Chapter 32
Bradley stormed through the lounge of Top Floor and slammed his office door as he entered. Claudia's hearing had finished earlier that afternoon, only a month after her arrest for abducting and assaulting Erin. He didn't need to be there, and probably should have stayed away, but the idea that Erin might have been there, may have shown up, had been too enticing a lure to keep him away.
It had been a month since he'd seen Erin at the hospital. An entire month of unanswered texts and voicemails. He stopped calling after the first week and stopped sending text messages after the third. If she could just understand, if he could just apologize, maybe she would see reason.
Going to court only turned out to be another day of frustration and anger. Claudia pled guilty by reason of insanity, and her trial was set for several months down the road. The only consolation that kept Bradley from storming the room was she would be held without bail. He had made sure to stay out of Claudia's eyesight—no need for her to start thinking he was there for her.
Bradley threw himself into his chair as his office door opened, and Alex waltzed in with Alyssa just a few steps behind him. "Got a minute?" he asked, taking a seat, completely ignoring the scowl Bradley shot at them.
"We'll make it quick." Alyssa waved her hand at him, as though that would keep his temper in check.
"What then?" Bradley barked.
"How did court go?" Alex leaned back in his chair, unfazed by the demand in Bradley's tone. "I know Erin wasn't there." Alex glanced to Alyssa. "She hasn't been out of her apartment in two weeks."
"What?" He had heard she'd gotten an apartment, sold her house and moved into Jessica's old apartment. "Why?"
"Not really sure. She won't talk to anyone really. Just says she's busy with the move and work. She's been working from home." Alyssa shrugged.
"She's hiding again," Bradley said. "She's holed up in her apartment, just like when she broke up with that asshole." His chest ached from the knowledge that she found herself right back where he had found her. She had blossomed so much with him, had realized the power she held. How could she just slink back into that pit?
"It's different this time." Alex shook his head. "She's just different. Miserable. More so than with Jonathan. We barged in there last night." Alex looked to Alyssa, as though the two of them were set on taking turns giving him the shitty news.
"What? Was someone there with her?" He'd kill whoever the fuck it was.
"No. She was alone."
"She was still in her pajamas. A few empty bottles of wine were scattered around the place, and several empty cartons of takeout were piled up in the kitchen." Alyssa was the one to finally offer that information.
Erin was a neat woman, constantly making sure the house was tidy. He couldn't imagine her living in such a mess. And he'd never seen her have more than one glass of wine.
"Have you gotten her to that trauma doctor?" he demanded.
"She made the appointment, but didn't go," Alex said. "Look, I know you think she's upset about what happened, but I don't think it's the attack. I mean, I'm sure that's some of it, but it's not all of it."
"Of course it is. I'm her Dom. I was supposed to protect her, and I didn't. She was made vulnerable because of me, and I just let her walk around without any protection." Bradley had been through all of this over and over again. If he had hired a security team to trail her, to keep with her, she wouldn't have been in trouble in the first place. Claudia wouldn't have gotten to her.
"I'm glad you said that." Alyssa's lips pulled into a warm smile. She gave Alex a little punch in the arm. "See, I told you he wasn't a complete lost cause."
"What are you talking about?" Bradley let out a sigh. His head hurt, and his stomach seemed to twist even further into a knot knowing what Erin was allowing herself to go through. She needed to get to the trauma doctor. She needed to talk and be around people who loved her. Around him. Because no one would love her as much as he did.
"You said you are her Dom, not were, but are," Alyssa pointed out, as though that made everything as clear as glass.
"That doesn't change anything. A stupid word. She won't take my calls."
"Of course not." Alex nodded. "Our Erin can be a bit thick-headed when she wants to be. She gets an idea in her head, and it's not easy to erase it. And the idea she has right now is complete bullshit, but she won't listen to any of us."
"Which is why we are here. You need to go to her apartment."
"You are both mad." He pushed himself out of his chair and went to pour himself a brandy. A stiff drink after the afternoon he had would be just the thing. Then he'd go home, pour himself half a dozen more, and maybe, just maybe, he'd sleep through the night and not wake up with his heart torn into quarters.
"No, we are completely sane. It's the two of you who are off your rockers. You have one stupid notion, she has another. Both of you are wrong, both of you are stubborn."
"I'm not stubborn. I've called. I've texted. I even went to Royce's apartment. He wouldn't let me in," Bradley told them.
"I've been there before," Alex muttered, giving Alyssa a purposeful glance.
"Yes, but have you done your thing?" Alyssa asked, pointing a finger at Bradley.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Bradley couldn't make sense of what she was saying.
"You know. The Dom thing. You all have one." She shrugged again.
"What is your woman talking about?" Bradley turned to Alex for help, though Alex looked equally confused.
"You have a thing, all Doms do. A look, or word, something that triggers our submissive side." Both men turned and looked at her with suspicion. "Don't tell me you don't do it on purpose." She sighed, then turned a deep shade of red.
"Not always, no." Alex laughed.
"Well, then…" She turned her gaze on Bradley again. "Do your thing."
"I don't have a thing." He tossed back the last of his brandy. "She's never been anything but submissive when with me. She's been fucking perfect, even when she fucks up, she's perfect."
"That's your thing." Alyssa pointed at him.
"Between you and Kelly, I'm losing my patience for women." Bradley poured another drink.
"Kelly isn't bad, she's just…well, I think you're the first guy she's ever met that actually frightens her a little.
"
"Why the hell…? You know what, never mind."
"She's tried talking to Erin too, came to your defense and everything." Alyssa stood from her chair and took the glass from Bradley before he could down his third drink. "Go to her apartment, demand she listen to you, and set her straight."
"On what? That everything that happened wasn't my fault when it completely was?"
She closed her eyes and took a calming breath.
They were running around in circles. His head was really beginning to pound.
"Bradley, she thinks you were going to throw her out of your life, that you were never going to work because you would soon be bored with her and toss her to the side."
He listened to Alyssa as she finally got the point. The overwhelming rage that overcame him surprised him. "Why the fuck would she think that?"
"From what I pieced together from the girls, you gave Erin a book when you first started seeing her."
Bradley thought back to their original meeting. "Yeah. So what?"
"Erin needs to explain it to you. It has something to do with that book and something about her being a novelty item. In no way does she blame you for what happened with Claudia and Travis."
Alex grasped Alyssa's hand, and said, "Go to her apartment. Like, now. I don't care if you have to whip the sense back into her, just get it there. I have never seen that woman look so lost in my life. She needs you, Bradley."
"She's not a weak little bird," Bradley muttered.
"No, she's not. But she's not using her damn brain right now. She needs you to remind her she's strong. Remind her she's not supposed to roll over and die because she's been hurt." Alex slapped him on the shoulder. "Whatever you woke inside of her brought her to life. We've seen it blossom when she was with you."
Bradley watched the two of them walk out of his office hand in hand. Alex had fucked up with Alyssa but had gotten her back. The book.
He ran his eyes over his bookshelf to find the one he'd given her. If he remembered right, there was a full chapter on the topic he wanted. Flipping through quickly, he found it and a weight lifted from his chest. His pet would learn a few lessons from him yet.
He just needed to get her to let him into the apartment.
Chapter 33
"I just sent it. You should have it in your inbox already." Erin leaned back in her chair, staring at her computer screen.
"Yep, here it is. I'll get it over to printing. Uh…you have a three o'clock meeting tomorrow with Sean."
Erin sighed. She hadn't left the apartment since she’d moved in several weeks ago, aside from quick trips to the grocery store down the block.
"Okay, I'll be there." At least she hoped she would. Staying hidden away the rest of her life wasn't going to work for her career. "Can you please reserve the conference room? And if you could be in the meeting with me, that would really be great." Sean wasn't a threat, her head knew that, but looking down at the healing wound on her arm, she didn't want to take any chances.
"Of course, Erin. Not a problem," Brenda said. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" The soft, hesitant voice grated against Erin, though she couldn't rightfully blame Brenda. She had been hiding out in her apartment for weeks with little contact with the outside world, aside from the delivery men who brought her food.
"Thanks. See you tomorrow." Erin clicked off the call and turned her chair to take in her surroundings. An empty pizza box sat on the coffee table alongside an empty wine bottle. Clothes that had been washed, but not yet folded, were crumbled up on the armchair, and dirty dishes from her breakfast of frozen waffles and oatmeal still sat on the end table.
Knowing she should get up and clean the mess, but having no patience or energy to do so, she pushed off her chair and went into the kitchen to grab a soft drink. Something full of sugar and carbonation would help.
It had been weeks. Why was she still feeling so dead inside? No, dead wasn't right, that would imply a numb feeling. She'd beg for numbness. No, the pain in her chest was very much alive. Passing by the bookcase, she caught a glance of the damn book she'd been trying to get up the nerve to throw away.
If she could just toss it in the garbage can, this would all end. She could stop fighting her urge to flip through the book to find all her highlighted markings. The desire to seek more answers within the pages would have faded if the temptation wasn't glaring at her every time she walked into the living room. Yet every time she reached for it with the purpose of tossing it out, she'd stop herself. Not willing to dig into the reasons as to why, she would promise herself to do it the next day. Staring at the book in a dead lock of emotions, she barely heard the doorbell ring. Midafternoon on a Thursday, everyone she knew should be at work.
"FedEx," the voice from the intercom told her.
She hadn't ordered anything. "Just leave it by the door."
"I need a signature, ma'am," the garbled voice insisted.
"Fine. I'll be right down."
She wasn't afraid of the FedEx guy. It wasn't fear that made her hesitate. It had more to do with the fact that she hadn't showered since the morning before, and also hadn't changed her clothes. She grabbed a wrinkled shirt from the laundry pile on the chair and threw it over her tank top. Wrinkled as all hell, at least the pizza stain from last night's dinner would be hidden.
When she jogged down the stairs to the front door, the FedEx guy looked a little irked to be left waiting for so long. She couldn't find her damn shoe. It wasn't her fault. She hadn't expected anyone.
After signing for the package, she headed back up to her apartment looking for the return portion of the mailing label. She found it as her apartment door shut behind her.
Bradley Sorenson Top Floor
She froze. Every muscle in her body revolted against her brain that said throw it away and never look at it again. That chapter in her life had ended. She'd shut the book on it herself. It was over.
Then why was there a package from him in her hands? What could he have sent her? She'd already picked up all of her things from his house under the cloak of darkness, knowing he'd be at the club and George wouldn't stop her. He did try to lecture her about being upfront and fully honest with Bradley, and mentioned more than a few times Bradley wouldn't be pleased she stole away while he had his back turned. She apologized to him and tried to get him to understand seeing Bradley would be too hard. The older man had only raised an eyebrow and pinched his lips in response.
With a trembling hand, she peeled back the tab to open the box and yanked it across the box. The package opened, and a book along with a letter flew out and onto the floor.
She picked up the letter first, handwritten by him.
Pet,
I'm not sure exactly what's going on in that pretty head of yours. I thought we were past hide and seek, but I suppose not. You have been through a horrible experience; one I should have prevented and didn’t. For that, I can’t apologize enough. I don't like what I'm hearing in regard to how you are taking care of yourself, but that can be addressed later.
She paused and looked around the apartment, then down at her own attire. If he were there to see what she'd done to herself, she would be completely humiliated.
I realized I missed a very important part in your training. Then again, I wasn't quite finished before you ran away. With you, I don't think I could ever be finished. Together, we could both grow and learn from each other, each day bringing something new to our lives. However, this particular item should have been addressed by now.
He could never be finished with her? How could he mean that? He didn't, that's how. Her own cynicism surprised her. She'd been living in Jessica's apartment too long. Her past man-hate was beginning to seep into Erin's own psyche.
Turn to page 108 and read the entire chapter. I will be at the club tonight if you'd like to discuss your reading. I will expect you at 8 p.m. Please be sure to wear something non-kindergarten teacher-like.
I hope to see you there.
With all my love,
Bradley.
With all his love? He loved her? She shook her head, willing the hopefulness to go away. She couldn't believe that. Wouldn't believe it. She'd been a fool once—no, twice—but she’d finally learned her lesson.
Erin read the letter three more times, picking it apart word by word, trying to find the hidden meaning. The secret agenda. If he was into just training newbies like Claudia had said, like she allowed herself to believe, why would he ask for her to return? Now that the club was open to the public for membership, he could have his pick of a newbie sub. There wasn't a need to drag her back.
She peeked down at the book that rested on the floor near her mismatched-shoed feet and picked it up. The same book he'd gifted to her at their first meeting. The book she hadn't had the heart to throw away.
After tossing the empty box to the floor and tucking the letter beneath her arm, she flipped to page 108 and read the title of the chapter. Trust and Open Communication in a D/s Relationship. After which, written in his handwriting, was: and Love. That word again.
Several lines were highlighted, and little notes were scribbled in the margins. His notes for her. She began reading while walking over to her couch. Sitting in the corner, pulling her knees up to her chest, she went over the entire chapter, reading each word of his notes. When she finished, she began again.
The elevator ride from the main level to Top Floor seemed endless as Erin made her way up to see Bradley. Her stomach knotted even further when the doors finally dinged and slid open. Jeremy, a new member of the security staff, took notice of the doors opening and relaxed when he saw it was her. A warm smile in greeting, he nodded.
"He's expecting you, Erin." Jeremy had been the same staff member to let her know he was expecting her the last time she'd graced the club. It had been the night of her punishment. She wished she could conjure up angry emotions about the last night they’d spent together, but all she remembered was how loving he was after he spanked her. How much he cuddled her in the car on the way home, and how warm it felt to have his body pressed against hers while they slept.