by Linda Warren
“I know. Tomorrow you’ll go see the attorney, and I will go into Austin and do what I can. And then we’ll go from there.”
She lifted her head to look at him. “You believe me, then?”
“It’s kind of hard not to. You have a very sincere voice.”
“Oh...” She was flabbergasted. He’d complimented her. She almost swooned. There was a lot of softness in Cole Chisholm, but it was buried so deep that it would take more than sincerity to break through it.
As if realizing he was standing too close to her, he took a step backward. “Okay. Tomorrow the weather should be better, and you probably should see the lawyer early.”
“Yes...um... I don’t have a vehicle.”
“You’ll have to drive Grandpa’s truck.”
“I’ve never driven a truck.”
He sighed. “I’ll give you a driving lesson first thing in the morning. It’s easy. It’s just like a car, and Horseshoe is small, so you shouldn’t have a problem.”
Without thinking, she stepped forward and rested her head on his chest. He stiffened, but she didn’t draw away. He was solid steel, just like Grandpa had said. But beyond the steel, inner warmth radiated, and that’s what attracted her. Cole would help her, and maybe somewhere along the way she could help him.
* * *
ON MONDAY MORNING Grace was up early and took a shower, hoping not to wake Zoe. Wrapped in a bathrobe, she hurried back to her room and stopped in her tracks. Cole, fully dressed, was holding Zoe. Or trying to hold Zoe. He had his arms under her armpits and held her out as if she was contaminated or something.
“She’s not a bomb about to go off,” Grace said.
“I’ve never held a baby,” he said in a hoarse voice. “She was whimpering, so I thought I’d pick her up. She weighs nothing.”
Grace took Zoe around the waist and placed her on Cole’s shoulder. “Pat her back and she’ll go to sleep on your shoulder.”
Cole had a paralyzed look on his face, and Grace wanted to laugh.
“Grace, it’s time for breakfast,” Mr. Walt hollered from the kitchen. Rascal barked in response.
Cole quickly handed off Zoe. Their arms and hands got all tangled up. “Wait,” Grace said, unable to stop laughing. “This should be easier. Just let me take her from you.” That worked, and Zoe thought it was a game. She gurgled happily.
Cole held up his hands. “I’m free.”
“Have you really not ever held a baby?”
“Do you need more evidence?”
How sad! She made a decision in a split second. “Why don’t you take Zoe to Mr. Walt while I change clothes.”
One eyebrow shot up. “Are you kidding? I don’t think I can hold her and walk at the same time.”
“Oh, for heaven’s sake.” She placed Zoe on his shoulder again. “Keep your arm under her bottom and your hand on her back. She’s pretty flexible. For a big ol’ detective like you, it should be a piece of cake.”
“Huh...” Before Cole could voice his concerns, his arms immediately went into position.
“Now walk.” She didn’t laugh, but it was hard not to as he slowly made his way down the hall to the kitchen as if he was holding a bomb.
“There’s my girl,” Grandpa said, and Grace let out a long breath. Mission accomplished. Cole made it to the kitchen without incident. That set the tone for the day.
After breakfast, Cole and Grace went to the barn for a driving lesson. Grandpa’s old truck was parked in the barn and about as old as dirt, she figured.
“Don’t you want to drive it out of the barn first?” Grace asked, looking at the vehicle as if it might be something out of a museum.
Cole shook his head. “No. Backing it out will be your first lesson.”
“Oh, gee, thanks.”
She got into the driver’s seat, and Cole slipped in on the passenger side. It was a small truck and clearly not made for a man Cole’s size. The seat went all way across, and there was also a very small back seat. No bucket seats for this vehicle. And hardly any room. The truck smelled faintly of hay, sweat and Old Spice.
“That’s the gearshift right back of the steering wheel. It’s an automatic, so it should be easy to use.”
“Yeah, right. Didn’t I see a car in the garage?”
“That’s Grandma’s car, and Grandpa doesn’t let anyone touch it.”
“Why not? She’s not here anymore. Is she? Sometimes I’m not real sure with Mr. Walt talking to her.”
A grin split his face, and it was a wonderful thing to see. “I’m not sure, either. Things have always been a little strange around here.”
“How do you mean?”
“My birthday is December eleventh, and my parents died on December twelfth. After that my grandmother was different, they said. She never celebrated Christmas, nor did she celebrate my birthday. It was too painful, Grandpa said. It reminded her of Jamie’s death.”
“You’ve never had a birthday party?”
He shook his head. “No. I think she wiped it from her mind. Grandpa was right there for me, though. He’d order two big cupcakes from the bakery in town and buy some soft drinks, and we’d sit right here in the barn and eat cupcakes and celebrate my birthday. He’d give me a gift, and if Grandma saw it, she would ask where I got it. I’d say Grandpa, and she’d just nod.”
“Oh, that is so sad.”
“Christmases were the worst. All the other kids had trees in their homes, but we never did.”
“Cole, that is too depressing to even think about. Please tell me your grandpa did something for the holidays.”
“Yeah. A few days before Christmas, we’d go to the woods and cut down a cedar tree and put it up in the corner of the barn. There’s no electricity there, so we couldn’t have lights. Grandpa found some sparkly plastic ones that looked like lights, and we put them on the tree with some tinsel and some ornaments I made in school.”
“This is going to make me cry.”
He glanced at her. “Do women cry about everything?”
“When it’s this sad,” she said with a spark of defiance.
“It’s not sad. It was the way life was back then, because my grandma was grieving herself to death and we didn’t want to upset her.”
“Heaven forbid! She needed to see a doctor.”
“Grandpa took her, but she wouldn’t go back. And that was the end of that.”
They were about sixteen inches apart on the seat. His knees were up to the dashboard, and his left hand rested on the seat. He clenched and unclenched it as he talked, and she knew the past still bothered him. But he was talking to her, and that was good. She wanted to know more.
“So you’d spend Christmas in the barn?”
“On Christmas morning I would get up and put my house shoes on and run to the barn. Grandpa would be there sitting on a bale of hay with milk and cookies, and there would be presents under the tree. I was so excited I could barely eat. I just wanted to tear into the presents. Grandpa always seemed to know what I wanted—a fishing rod, a bike, a horse, a BB gun, a knife, boots, a cowboy hat. And there was always candy and fruit.”
“And your grandma never noticed this?”
“My grandmother lived in her own little world, but like I said, sometimes she would ask me where I got such and such and I’d say Grandpa, and she would just nod like it was nothing.”
Grace had no words. She didn’t tell him it was sad or that she wanted to cry. It was his life, and she couldn’t change a thing. No one could.
“I thought my upbringing was unusual, but yours takes the prize.”
He glanced at her, his eyes twinkling. “I didn’t know it was a competition.”
“It isn’t,” she replied, feeling breathless from the light in his eyes.
“My grandmother just wanted her son back, and when that didn’t happen she tried to ma
ke me into Jamie.”
“What do you mean?”
“She called me Jamie. Every time I’d come through the back door, she would yell, ‘Jamie, is that you?’ and I would reply, ‘No, Grandma. It’s Cole.’ She would say ‘Oh’ in a disappointed voice, and every time I felt as if I failed her.”
“You know that you didn’t, right?”
“Yeah.” The light in his eyes disappeared as he dealt with memories from his childhood.
“You know what you need, Cole Chisholm?”
He glanced at her again. “No, but I’m afraid you’re going to tell me.”
“You need a hug. I mean a big ol’ hug, a squeeze-the-daylights-out-of-you hug. One that would make all those bad memories go poof, right out of your mind.”
His eyes caught hers. “Are you volunteering?”
“I could, but Mr. Walt said you have a girlfriend and I...”
“For your information, Ms. Bennett, I do not need a hug. Now, would you start this damn truck? We’re wasting half the morning in here gabbing.”
Unable to resist, she saluted.
He frowned. “Stop it.”
She turned the key, and the truck roared to life. Really roared. Loud. Chickens flew out from under it, and the rooster landed on the hood and crowed.
Cole rolled down the window and shouted at the rooster. “Get off of there, Otis.” The rooster flapped to a bale of hay.
“This truck is too loud!” she said above the roar. “What’s wrong with it?”
“It has a hole in the tailpipe. I thought Grandpa had it fixed.”
“I guess you were wrong.” She turned off the key. “I can’t drive this. It’s too loud. It would scare Zoe.”
“It’s all we have right now.”
She glared at him. “There’s the car.”
“You can’t drive Bertha. It would upset Grandpa.”
She chuckled. “You named the car?”
“Grandma did, or Grandpa, I’m not sure. The car’s over thirty years old.”
“Is there anything new around here?”
“No. I’ll take you into town and go to Austin later. That’s the only solution.”
She shook her head. “No. I’m going to talk to Mr. Walt.” She opened the door and got out and had to sidestep chickens to make it to the barn door.
Cole got out, too, and tripped over a chicken. The hen was not happy, squawking at his feet. “Grace, come back here.”
She kept the laughter inside. “Your grandmother and Jamie are gone. They’re resting in peace in heaven, and that car sitting in the garage is not helping anyone.”
“Grace...”
She ran toward the house. Bertha was getting an outing. And somehow, some way, the Chisholm family was moving into the twenty-first century. Ghosts and all.
CHAPTER EIGHT
COLE FOLLOWED MORE SLOWLY. She was the most infuriating, irritating, interfering and nosiest woman he’d ever met. As if the world’s problems could be solved with a hug and a kiss. Why couldn’t she understand this was his life and he didn’t expect it to change? He knew by the time he was five that his grandmother was sick. He’d accepted that. Some days it was hard when she called him Jamie over and over. He’d just go to his room and read comic books and dream of saving the world like a superhero.
He paused at the back door and took a deep breath. There was no way he would allow her to hurt his grandpa. He’d walk through fire before he would let that happen.
Grace knelt by Grandpa’s chair, and Cole stood in the kitchen listening to her weave that magic she seemed to have. The baby was on a quilt on the floor, sitting up and chewing on a doll.
“Mr. Walt, I can’t drive that truck.”
“Why not? It’s old, but it still runs good.”
“It’s loud and it would scare Zoe.”
“Ah, yeah, I was supposed to get that fixed. It slipped my mind.” Grandpa looked at Cole. He’d reminded his grandpa three times about the truck, and he now realized he would have to do it himself, just like paying Grandpa’s bills. About a year ago, he got a call from his grandpa that the electricity had been turned off and he didn’t know why. It turned out he hadn’t paid his bill. From then on he’d been taking care of all the bills for his grandparents. Grandpa couldn’t remember what he’d paid and what he hadn’t.
“It’s okay, Grandpa. We’ll take it in one day this week and see if Lamar can fix it.”
“I need a car today, Mr. Walt.”
“Well, Cole can take you to see Gabe.”
“He has to go to Austin to check on my sister’s death. He really needs to do that, so I can have a good chance of keeping Zoe.”
“Then you’ll have to use the truck.”
“There’s a car in the garage,” Grace slipped in smoothly.
“Oh, no, no!” Grandpa sat up straight in his chair. “That’s Cora’s car, and nobody drives it.”
“Why?”
Grandpa shrugged. “I don’t know. That’s just the way it is.”
“So you’re going to let it sit in the garage forever as a tribute to your wife?”
“If I want to.”
Grace touched Grandpa’s hand gripping the chair. “I’m sorry, Mr. Walt. I’ll drive the truck. I don’t want to upset you.”
“We bought that car when Cole was little. Cora didn’t want him riding the bus by himself. I took him to school every morning in that car, and some days Cora would pick him up. Bertha has a lot of special memories. Like one time when Cole was about four, we went into town to buy groceries. On the way back, Cole said he felt sick. He had been stuffing his face with candy that I’d bought him. Cora was yelling stop and I pulled over and yanked Cole out of the seat. I held him around the waist, and he puked all over my boots. We laughed about that. One of the rare times Cora laughed.” Grandpa looked at Cole. “Remember that?”
“Yeah,” he replied. But he didn’t. He’d been too young. A warm feeling touched his heart. So many times he wanted to deny that his grandparents cared anything about him, but when he listened to his grandpa he knew they did. It was just different, like he had tried to explain to Grace.
Those times when he would get ready for school with his backpack, Grandma would kiss the top of his head and say, “Be good in school, Jamie.” He would reply, “Grandma, I’m Cole.” Then she would add, “You be good, too.”
That’s when he started feeling like two people. Was he Jamie? Or was he Cole? In his mind he knew who he was, but he could never convince his grandmother otherwise.
Grace got to her feet. “I guess I’ll go fire up the truck again and drive it around the barn or something. I might need a helmet and earplugs.”
She was taking this with a sense of humor. He liked that. She could handle Grandpa, but he knew Grandpa wasn’t going to budge on the car unless...
At that moment Zoe rolled to her stomach and scooted over to Grandpa. She grabbed onto his jeans and pulled herself up, reaching out her hands for him to take her. He lifted her to his lap. In a short amount of time, those two were forming a strong bond. He made a decision in a second.
“Grandpa, don’t you think it would do the car good to drive it? It’s been sitting there for so long. And Grace really needs a safe vehicle to drive Zoe to see the lawyer so she can file for custody.”
Grandpa glanced at him briefly while rocking Zoe. “You think so? I just...you know...”
“Grandma is in heaven with Jamie, and I know she’s happy. She’s finally with him again, and I don’t think she’d mind at all if Grace used the car. Grandma wanted all cars to be safe, especially for children. Remember?”
“Yeah. She didn’t want to haul you around in that old vehicle we had. She said we needed something safe and new. And we took Bo home many a time because she didn’t want him walking home alone. She was a good woman, but she just couldn�
�t deal with the loss of our son. She...”
“It’s okay, Grandpa. We’ll just leave the car alone.” He wasn’t letting anyone touch the car unless Grandpa was okay with it. One hundred percent okay.
“No.” Grandpa shook his head. “It’s time to dust the ashes off the car and get some use from it. Grace needs a car, and I know Cora would want this little one—” he bounced Zoe up and down “—to have a safe home. Grace needs to do that as soon as possible.”
“Are you sure?”
Grandpa looked at Grace. “Are you a good driver?”
“Yes, Mr. Walt. Saturday was my first wreck, and I’ve never gotten a ticket.”
“You can’t use your phone while you’re driving.”
“No, sir. I wouldn’t do that with Zoe in the car.”
“Then you can use Bertha. I’m going with you.”
Grace gave a nervous smile. “Okay, deal.”
Cole glanced from Grace to his grandpa. “Then I’ll leave you two to it.”
Grace followed him to the door. “Now I’m nervous about driving it.”
He paused with his hand on the doorknob. “You’re nervous? Now that I can’t believe. You rush in where angels fear to tread. So good luck.”
“When will you be back?”
He stared into her dark pools of worry. “Depends how my day goes. But I’ll try to get home by six.”
“Okay.” Her anxiety coated the word.
“What? You fought to drive the car. Now drive it.”
“It’s just...it’s just easy to forget why I’m here. I’m just nervous about what’s going to happen in Austin and that there’s a real good chance I could lose Zoe.”
“Just keep fighting, Grace. And if you’re lucky, I just might let you hug me one day.”
* * *
GRACE TRIED NOT to let Cole’s parting words get to her, but at the oddest moment she would think about what it would be like to put her arms around him. And then she would push the thought from her mind. He had a girlfriend. She had to keep reminding herself of that. And she wasn’t ready to get involved with anyone.
She wanted to leave early, but Mr. Walt had to feed the animals, and she couldn’t go without him. When they finally got in the car, Grace was surprised to see Zoe’s car seat already installed. Cole must’ve done it before he’d left. Cole Chisholm’s heart was alive and well and hadn’t been damaged by his childhood.