“No. You have some interesting books here. Eckhart Tolle. Deepak Chopra. It’s like self-help central. I take it you’re all…helped? Totally zen? No issues at all?”
“Not quite.”
He picked one out of the lineup. “Ten Secrets. What’s this one about?”
“It’s a self-help book,” I deadpanned.
“You don’t say.”
“The gist is that everyone is hiding at least ten secrets that keep them from truly progressing in life.”
“Ten? Is that right?”
“Yeah. Sometimes we’re not even aware we’re suppressing them.”
He looked down at the cover, then over at me. “I’ve got at least one, but I’m not sure about ten. You?”
“Of course. We all have secrets, things that fester.”
He flipped through the book. “Tell me one of yours.”
“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a secret.”
He pointed to the pages. “Yes, but according to this book, your secrets are holding you back.”
“I’ll live with the risk.”
Caleb snickered. “I have a secret you’d be interested in knowing, one that pertains to you.”
My heart fluttered. “Really?”
“Yup.” He raised his chin. “Want to know what it is?”
“Yes, I would, if it pertains to me.”
Caleb put the book back on the shelf and rubbed his hands together. “My secret is…”
He paused.
When I couldn’t take it anymore, I said, “What is it?”
“You’re definitely gonna want to hear this,” he murmured.
I laughed. “Okay…then tell me.”
He took a few steps toward me and leaned close to my ear. Chills ran through me as he said, “I know for a fact it wasn’t you who made that smell in the loo.”
I looked him in the eyes. “How?”
“Because I’d been in the men’s room earlier that morning, and it smelled exactly the same.”
“Why didn’t you say that at the time?”
“Because it was too much fun watching you squirm.” He winked. “It’s a good thing I’m living here. I’ll have a lot more chances to do that.”
CHAPTER THREE
* * *
TEAGAN
Later that day, I nearly fell off the chair I’d been standing on in the kitchen when Caleb came up behind me.
“Need some help?”
I trembled as I slowly climbed down. For some reason, I’d assumed he’d left the house.
It was late in the afternoon. My father was still at work, and Maura and Shelley had left for my sister’s cheerleading practice. Classes didn’t start at Northern until the following Monday, so apparently Caleb had nothing better to do than hang here. I suppose that shouldn’t have annoyed me since he lived here now, but it did.
With Maura out of the house, I’d figured this was my opportunity to raid the candy shelf. I’d seen her stashing some bags up high the other day. She had been cracking down recently on Shelley’s and my dad’s eating habits, so I assumed she’d been hiding the sweets on the highest shelf in the kitchen. But because our ceilings were so tall and our cabinets so high, I’d underestimated the ability of this chair to get up there. Caleb had appeared in the midst of my botched effort.
“Trying to reach something?”
“Yeah, actually.” I could feel myself breaking a sweat.
He pushed the chair back to the table and scratched his chin as he looked up. As tall as Caleb was, he couldn’t reach the cupboard either.
To my shock, he knelt in front of the counter and pointed to his shoulders.
“Get on.”
“What?”
“I’ll give you a lift to get what you need.”
He wants me to get on his shoulders? “That’s okay.”
He insisted. “Hop on.”
I swallowed hard and did as he said, sitting on his shoulders and wrapping my legs around his neck. The feel of his hard muscles pressing against my clit was interesting, to say the least—pretty sure this was the ultimate cheap thrill. He rose slowly, and when he reached his full height, I was exactly where I needed to be to open the forbidden cabinet at the top.
It was hard to concentrate on what I’d come up here to retrieve, though. There was no light inside the cupboard, and admittedly, I wasn’t paying close attention. All that registered was the heat of his body and the sensation of his strong hands holding each of my legs. And from up here, his musky smell was amplified. My heart was going a mile a minute as I grabbed any old thing.
“Got it,” I said, assuming I’d found some sort of tart candy or chocolate.
Anything would do to satisfy my sweet craving. The bigger problem right now was the fact that my nipples were hard. I needed to get down off of Caleb because he’d be able to read my body’s reaction if I stayed with the back of his head between my legs any longer.
Only my deprived body could get off on a piggyback ride.
He lowered himself to the ground, and I climbed off. “Thanks.”
His eyes fell to the bag of candy in my hand. He squinted. “Interesting choice.”
“What…”
I looked down at the package. What the hell, Maura? “Um…this…I don’t even know what this is.”
He nearly snorted. “You went through all that trouble for penis candy?”
The bag was filled with rainbow-colored tart candies in the shape of dicks.
I wanted to kill my stepmom. Then I remembered she’d been planning a bridal shower for her friend Darlene. She’d probably bought these as favors and had been hiding them from Shelley.
“Okay, full disclosure: I was trying to satisfy a sweet craving and wasn’t really paying attention to what I grabbed. I just wanted something sugary. I had no idea Maura was hiding these up there. Pretty sure they’re for a bridal shower she’s planning for her friend.”
He seemed confused. “Bridal shower?”
“Yeah. It’s a party you have for a woman who’s about to get married.”
“Ah. Like a hen-do.”
“Hen?”
“Yeah. A hen party. That’s what they call it back home when they take the girl out before the wedding.”
I nodded. “Bachelorette party—yeah, something like that.”
He smirked. “So that’s what you women do at those things? Sit around eating penis candy?”
“Not always.” I shook my head. “Never mind.”
Caleb reached for the bag. I handed it to him, and he examined it. Then he grabbed a chair so he could return the candy to the cabinet.
After several seconds up there, he announced, “Well, it’s confirmed.”
“What?”
“There’s definitely a dick party in the works. Massive penis piñata stuffed at the back here.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. “Shit.”
“Oh wait. I’m wrong. Not just a penis party. There are some pussy licker pops up here, too.” He snorted. “That bag is open already. What does that mean?”
That I’m mortified. Just mortified.
“Do you mind just…getting down, please?”
“Sure, love.”
He closed the cabinet and climbed off the chair.
He hadn’t come down empty-handed, though. “Do you think Maura would mind if she knew I stole a peach pussy pop? It was a pack of one hundred.”
My face must have been so red right now.
He pulled the wrapper off and licked it in one long swipe. That sent an unwelcome shiver down my spine that went straight to my loins. He popped it into his mouth.
“Your face right now?” He laughed as he sucked on it. “Priceless.”
When it came to this guy, I had to be cursed. “I just wanted a piece of candy,” I muttered.
He pulled the pop out of his mouth and handed it to me. “Well, here you go.”
He winked and squeezed my shoulder before heading up the stairs.
I went down to my room feeling embarrass
ingly worked up.
I lay on my bed and sucked on the pussy pop, painfully aware that it was still wet from his mouth and disgusted with myself for being so turned on by that.
***
Once classes started, I avoided Caleb when I saw him around campus. I wasn’t entirely sure why it felt so awkward to run into him there, of all places. He’d lift his hand and wave from across the student union or go out of his way to say hello if we passed each other. I, on the other hand, would walk the other way if he hadn’t spotted me yet.
Things with him had gotten better at home, though. No more arguments or awkward encounters to speak of. He’d eat with us a few times a week—always an entertaining addition to our dinners, and most of the time the center of our conversations. The initial shock of him being here had waned. Overall, having Caleb living with us was a lot different than I’d imagined it would be. He didn’t spend his nights taunting me or trying to get to know me better. As the days passed, he kept to himself more and more.
And that was fine, right? I mean, I didn’t need the complication of having to befriend him on top of everything else I had going on: adjusting to my classes and starting my new internship at the New England Aquarium. As a marine biology major, I was excited to gain hands-on experience that would help me toward a career as a research biologist.
So, given this cordial groove Caleb and I had found, it shouldn’t have bothered me when a girl I recognized from my biology class showed up at the house one Saturday. And yet, an unwanted, visceral jealousy hit me like a ton of bricks.
I knew her name was Veronica. She was tall with long, brown hair and a gorgeous face. She hadn’t knocked yet, but I spotted her approaching from the kitchen window. I could only assume she was here for Caleb.
“Hi. What’s up?” I said as I opened the door.
She jumped back, surprised. “Oh, I’m sorry,” she said. “He said he was coming down to meet me. I wasn’t going to bother you. I’m here to see Caleb.”
Big shocker there.
Before I could say anything, the sound of Caleb skipping down the steps registered.
“Hey, Veronica.” He turned to me. “Sorry. I didn’t mean for you to have to answer the door, Teagan. Veronica texted me she was here.”
I shrugged. “Oh, no worries. I was right by the door anyway.”
“Have you met my pseudo-sister Teagan before?” he asked her.
Pseudo-sister?
“Not officially. Although…” She squinted. “I think you’re in biology with me, right?”
“Yup. Yeah, I recognize you now.”
My eyes landed on his hand as it touched the small of her back, sending another pang of jealousy through me.
I cleared my throat. “Where are you guys headed?”
“Actually, we’re gonna check out that theater around the corner—the shady one your stepmother mentioned over dinner. Syd’s, is it? I’ve been morbidly curious about it.”
It stung a little that they were going there. Not sure why.
“Oh.” I nodded. “Well, have fun.”
“Thanks.” Veronica smiled. “We will.”
Heading to the theater on a gloomy day sounded really good. But I could have done that on my own, if I wanted. I was officially irritating myself. Caleb was a good-looking guy, but there were a lot of good-looking guys. Did I believe I had some kind of territorial right to him because he lived here?
I watched as they walked away. Any pathetic doubt I might have had about whether they were a thing went out the window when I saw him pull her close on the sidewalk and plant a long kiss on her lips. My stomach churned as I watched them until they eventually disappeared from sight.
Shelley ran down the stairs, snapping me out of my thoughts. “Did you see Caleb has a girlfriend?”
“How do you know she’s his girlfriend?” I asked, still looking toward the outside.
“Well, I don’t, but I saw them kiss from the upstairs window.”
“You should mind your own business instead of spying on Caleb.”
I was just about to turn around and go downstairs when I stopped myself. It was typical of me to have these kinds of brief interactions with my sister and then immediately retreat to my room. Whether I wanted to admit it or not, Caleb noticing my behavior toward Shelley sort of hit me where it hurt. And I really did want to be better, even if my relationship with my family had always been challenging.
I forced the words out. “Would you want to maybe go to Coolidge Corner? Get a bite to eat?”
She wrinkled her forehead. “You just told me to mind my own business. Now you want to take me out?”
“I know. I’m sorry for saying that. It’s natural to be curious.” I smiled. “Anyway…I just figured maybe I should spend more time with you. Wanna go?”
“Heck yeah, I wanna go! Do I need money?”
“Nah. I got you.”
Sometimes you have to force yourself to do what’s right, even if it doesn’t feel natural. Maybe eventually, it would get easier. Fake it till you make it. I needed to work on things with my sister—and my family, for that matter. But one step at a time.
***
Shelley and I ended up having a pretty good time that afternoon. We went for Japanese food. Shelley opted for hibachi while I ordered a few different maki rolls. The restaurant was one of my favorites. They had the best miso soup and shumai. It also happened to be just down the street from the theater. I couldn’t help wondering which movie Caleb and Veronica had chosen. I also wondered if they were watching the movie at all.
As we ate the orange slices the waitress brought to our table along with our bill, my sister said something that completely floored me.
“Did you know Caleb’s sister died?”
I stopped chewing. “What?”
“Yeah. I asked him if he had any siblings, and he told me he had a sister who died when they were younger.”
The orange felt like it was coming back up as my heart sank. “Oh my God. That’s terrible. I had no idea. Did he say how it happened?”
“No.”
Right then it dawned on me why he might have felt so compelled to remind me not to take my sister for granted—he no longer had his.
The rest of that Saturday, my chest felt heavy. It was impossible to think about anything else.
***
The next evening, I was reading downstairs in my room when Caleb appeared at the door.
“Fucking Mensa, Teagan? How could you keep this from me?”
Feeling my cheeks heat, I closed my book. “Who told you about that?”
“Shelley.” He entered and sat at the edge of my bed. “So it’s true? You’re a genius?”
I shook my head. “It’s no big deal.”
“It’s no big deal that you’re a genius—a flipping genius?”
A few years ago, I’d taken a test that qualified me for that particular high IQ society. Those who score at or above the ninety-eighth percentile on Mensa’s approved intelligence tests are granted membership.
“It’s nothing special. It just means I can pass a test.”
“Bloody hell. You don’t realize how impressive that is?”
I shrugged. “I mean…I never really think about it. I—”
“Let me tell you, then. It’s really fucking impressive.”
“Okay. If you say so…”
Blood seemed to rush to my head. I wasn’t that used to compliments, apparently.
He lay back horizontally on the bottom of the bed, placing his hands behind his head and staring at the ceiling. “I knew you were more than just a house mouse.”
“A house mouse?” I asked. “What’s that?”
He laughed. “I’m not even sure. It’s just the first term that came to mind. Maybe it’s like…a creature that hibernates in the basement, gnawing on cheese occasionally. At least now I know you’re doing brilliant things down here. I’d give anything to be able to ace tests.”
“You strike me as someone who’s very intell
igent.”
He continued to look up at the ceiling as he confessed, “I’m clever, not necessarily intelligent. I have the potential to be smart, but I get distracted very easily. That’s my downfall.”
I was currently distracted by his long, lean body splayed out on my bed, and by his intoxicating scent now saturating the air in my room and making my legs feel weak. My quiet sanctuary had been overtaken by his masculine energy.
“Distracted by what?” I asked.
“Everything. The smell of bacon. A pretty girl. A fly on the wall. Songs in my head. Random thoughts. Medication commercials at two in the morning. Pornographic imagery. You name it, it distracts me.”
“So, like ADD?”
“Not like ADD. Actual ADD. I’ve always struggled with my attention.”
“Oh, okay.”
“Yeah. So, school has always been a challenge for me. It took me a few years to garner the courage to start university. It’s part of the reason I’m late to the game. I feel like I might officially be the oldest freshman at Northern.”
Because he was a freshman and I was a sophomore, I sometimes forgot that Caleb—at twenty-two—was three years older than me.
I was sorry he struggled in school. It was hard for me to imagine because academics had always come so easy to me. I realized I was lucky.
I suggested something I hoped I wouldn’t regret. “Well, if you ever want to study together, let me know. I can quiz you or hold you accountable, make sure you’re not goofing off.”
Caleb’s face lit up as he rose to a sitting position. “You’re serious about that?”
Slightly unsure what I was getting myself into, I said, “I wouldn’t have offered if I wasn’t serious.”
“I know, but sometimes people offer things hoping the person won’t really take them up on it. Like when you see someone you haven’t seen in a while and say, ‘We should get together sometime.’ Half the time, you know that’s not going to happen, and you probably won’t ever see them again after you walk away. I’m the type of person that if you ask me over for dinner, I’m texting you immediately to set a date.”
“That’s a little annoying.” I laughed.
Just One Year Page 3