"I'll see you back in there," she said.
Logan nodded. Kirsty turned away from him.
"Kirsty," Logan said firmly.
Glancing back at him, she halted. "Yes?"
Logan's brows furrowed. "I meant what I said." He took one more step toward her. When he spoke, his voice shook with emotion. "You're everything to me, Kirsty MacAnliss."
Kirsty gasped quietly. Her heart started pounding, just like it had done when he'd kissed her. Lost for words, all she could do was smile at him and nod. Then she stepped off the boardwalk and started back toward the distant sounds of celebration.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
After church on the Sunday following the wedding, Logan was walking down the steps of the church with Jack and Alice when he saw Lucas Bradford standing at the foot of the steps. Lucas was smiling up at Logan, just like you'd expect a man to do twenty-four hours after marrying the woman he loved.
Right next to Lucas stood Abby and Kirsty. Both were dressed in their finest Sunday best gowns. Logan walked up to Lucas and grinned. "Good morning," he said. Touching the front brim of his Stetson, he bowed his head to Abby and Kirsty. "Ladies."
Logan glanced at Kirsty. After what had happened the previous night out on the boardwalk, Logan had expected Kirsty to look at him with at least some favor. Logan had revealed the true extent of his feelings to her. Instead of an approving look, however, Kirsty's features were set in a blank, unreadable expression.
"How are the newly-weds, this morning?" Logan asked and smiled at Abby. Logan's gaze flickered up to the blue sky. "Fine weather for the first day of married life."
Abby hooked her arm inside Lucas's. "We're happy, Logan." Smiling up at Lucas, she added. "We're just glad everything went so well."
Logan laid a gentle hand on Jack's shoulder. "Did you have a good time at the wedding?"
Jack nodded enthusiastically. Alice chimed in. "We made some new friends, too."
"That's good. You can never have too many friends," Kirsty said brightly. Logan told himself that, even if things were rocky between him and Kirsty, the beautiful homesteader would always have a soft spot for his children. At least that was something, Logan reassured himself.
Lucas peered at Logan. "Abby and I were wondering if you could help us out."
Logan's brows lifted in a line. "How?"
"We're moving my belongings from the homestead to Lucas's place," Abby explained. "And we wondered if you'd like to come and help us. We could do with an extra buckboard."
Logan glanced at Kirsty. Her lips were a thin, tight line. He thought about the prospect of continuing where he'd left off last night. The children might like a visit out to the homestead. "Sure. I'd be glad to help."
He'd planned on taking the children for a ride on his buckboard after church. It was sitting only a few yards away from where they were all standing.
"Why don't the children come with me and Lucas," Abby suggested. "And you and Kirsty can use your buckboard, Logan. How does that sound?"
Logan wasn't going to object to a chance to spend some time with Kirsty. "That sounds good." Kirsty's eyes widened slightly. Logan restrained the urge to frown.
Soon, they were all seated on their buckboards and riding southward down Main Street. Kirsty was sitting right next to Logan. Up ahead, Lucas and Abby were busy talking and joking with Jack and Alice.
Logan turned to Kirsty. "You didn't want me to come, did you?" he said evenly.
Kirsty frowned. "What gives you that idea?"
Logan shrugged. "Just a feeling."
Kirsty pulled her shoulders back and clasped her hands tightly in her lap. "Well, this time you're right. I don't think it's wise for you to be coming out to the homestead today."
"Why?"
"You can say that after what happened last night?"
Logan's brows furrowed. Holding tightly onto the reins, he peered ahead, trying to contain the sudden emotion triggered by her words. "And what exactly do you think happened last night, Kirsty?"
"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about."
He shook his head. "I sure don't. I thought I made myself perfectly clear. I told you how I feel about you. How much you mean to me."
"That's the problem," Kirsty countered. "You spoke too plainly. I understood what you were trying to tell me."
"Which is?" Logan asked, lifting a brow.
Kirsty paused for a long moment and then sighed loudly. "You know what today is, don't you."
Logan squinted at Kirsty. "I just said. It's Lucas and Abby's first day as a married couple."
Kirsty shook her head. "It's also my first day looking after the homestead all on my own." Logan heard the emotion in her voice. "I've got a lot to think about." She sighed.
She sounded distressed. Perhaps all the frantic preparations for the wedding had given her a chance to forget about what she was facing. And now that was all over, it had all come crashing in on her.
Logan gazed ahead and thought about what that might mean for Kirsty. She'd be worried and anxious about the start of her new life. He thought he knew what it meant to face an uncertain future. His circumstances were completely different from Kirsty's. He couldn't really imagine what all of this meant to her. "I'm sorry, Kirsty. I guess I didn't think it through." He leaned forward and narrowed his eyes. "I should have realized this is a big day for you. But it still doesn't change what I said to you last night." Glancing at her he added: "I meant every word of it."
Even though he understood this was a momentous day for her, Logan told himself he wasn't going to back down. Winning Kirsty's heart was too important to him.
Kirsty gazed, wide-eyed at Logan. For a moment, he was sure she was about to say something. But she didn't. Kirsty was silent for a few minutes as the buckboards rolled southward out of town and headed down the trail.
Kirsty stared straight ahead, her lips fixed into a tense line. She looked lost in thought. Logan didn't like it when she cut him out like this. But, at the same time, he could understand she wanted to keep him behind the line she'd drawn. The one he'd stepped over too many times.
Logan heard the children's laughter drifting on the breeze as the buckboards sped down the trail. He was glad they were happy. Gazing out across the rolling hills, Logan felt a strong sense of belonging. This was the only place he ever wanted to be. It was a beautiful land that filled his soul with peace and joy. It also made him realize he wanted only the best for the children. And for Kirsty.
He thought back to the pastor's sermon that morning. Pastor Joseph had spoken about how we are often placed by the Lord in a particular station in life. He puts us where we will find the life He wants for us. It's up to us to make a choice. We can either cooperate with God's generosity, or we can choose to reject that grace. If we rebel, there're always consequences. The Lord knows what we need, even if we fool ourselves into thinking we have it all figured out.
The words had struck a chord with Logan. He felt he'd been rebelling for too long. Thankfully, the Lord had seen fit to bring order to Logan's drifting existence. And He had done it by bringing three wonderful people into Logan's life. Jack and Alice were treasures Logan would always cherish. And Kirsty was equally precious to him. Logan knew that for sure.
He faced real obstacles if he was going to win Kirsty's heart. But he wasn't going to quit. He'd been led here for a reason. He wasn't going to throw this chance at love away. Because it was love that the Lord had brought into Logan's life.
Love for Kirsty MacAnliss. Just thinking about that made his heart sing.
Along with his adoration of the children, his love for Kirsty was precious.
Kirsty was silent for a long time. Logan figured she was lost in thought. He respected her need to be silent for a while. He was happy enough sitting alongside her, riding the trail.
Just before arriving at the homestead, Kirsty opened up to him again. "When we get to my home, can you just let me get on with helping Abby?" she asked.
"Sure," L
ogan agreed. He noted the way she'd described the homestead as her own place.
Kirsty looked at Logan. "You and I can talk some other time."
After that, she fell silent again. The buckboards rolled into the yard at the MacAnliss place. For the next hour, Kirsty and Abby were busy loading up Abby's things onto Lucas and Logan's buckboards. Jack and Alice used the time to play with the animals and generally run around the homestead making plenty of noise. Logan and Lucas waited outside while Kirsty and Abby prepared things inside the cabin.
Soon, the buckboards were stacked high with the bags and boxes containing Abby's belongings. Kirsty was still inside the cabin with Abby. Lucas leaned casually against his buckboard and peered thoughtfully at Logan. He could tell Lucas had something on his mind.
"How does it feel to be a married man?" Logan asked.
Lucas grinned. "Wonderful." He grasped the lapels of his jacket. "I couldn't be happier."
"I'm glad," Logan replied.
Lucas's eyes narrowed. "Maybe I won't be the last person to marry into the MacAnliss family."
"What do you mean?" Logan eyed Lucas carefully.
"Abby has been telling me all about you and Kirsty."
"What's she been saying?"
Lucas leaned back against the side of the buckboard. "Only that you've been courting Kirsty. Of course, everyone in town knows that you and Kirsty are good friends."
Logan frowned. "That's not what they were saying a few weeks ago."
Lucas nodded thoughtfully. "That was an unfortunate misunderstanding. But I think you sorted that out. Folks have moved on from that." Lucas eyed Logan carefully. "Seems like the whole town thinks you and Kirsty and the children are about to become a regular family."
Logan sighed. "Try telling that to Kirsty."
Lucas turned and faced Logan. "Why?"
"Let's just say that Kirsty has enough to be dealing with taking over this place here," Logan said and ran his gaze around the homestead. "The last thing she needs is talk like that."
"She's going to find running this place on her own a hard business," Lucas said.
"I agree." Logan pointed out across the fields. "All those crops are going to need extra hands."
"Kirsty is a tough woman."
Logan laughed uneasily. "I know that. I've had first hand experience of just how tough she can be."
Lucas frowned. "Abby thinks Kirsty is in love with you."
Logan froze, peering at Lucas. He could hardly believe the man had come right out and said that. Logan felt the air ease out of his lungs. He took a moment to gather his composure. Then he said: "Did Abby tell you that?"
Lucas nodded. "She sure did. And I figure she knows Kirsty pretty well." Logan saw Lucas examine him carefully. "Are the feelings mutual?" he asked. It was an innocent sounding question. Logan almost laughed at the casual way Lucas had asked it.
"This isn't some kind of bank transaction, Lucas," Logan said, feeling suddenly defensive.
Lucas laughed quietly. "Forgive me, Logan. I have a habit of seeing things like they're entries in a ledger. I expect things to balance out."
Logan groaned. "When it comes to hearts, there's no balancing the ledger, Lucas," he declared. He lifted a brow and peered at Lucas. "Sometimes the numbers just don't add up."
"I've still got plenty to learn when it comes to matters of the heart."
"Abby will soon fix that," Logan announced. "Mark my words."
Lucas grinned. "And I'm looking forward to her doing just that."
The door to the cabin opened. Kirsty and Abby emerged. Abby was carrying a carpetbag containing what Logan knew were the last of her things. It was placed on the back of Logan's buckboard. He called out and the children came running back from behind the cabin. Soon, Logan and the children were seated on the buckboard. Lucas and Abby sat on the other buckboard. Abby's arm was scooped inside Lucas's.
She smiled down at Kirsty who was standing with her hands on her hips. "I won't say goodbye," Abby stated.
"Today isn't the day for saying that," Kirsty said. Logan heard a defiant tone in her voice. He wondered what Kirsty and Abby had been saying to each other in the cabin.
"That offer still stands," Abby said.
Logan glanced at Kirsty, wondering what it could be. Kirsty shook her head. Again, there was a firmness to the gesture. "I can manage on my own," she announced. "You know I can."
Abby smiled hesitantly. "We'll come over in a few days. Just to see how you're doing."
"You mean you're going to check up on me," Kirsty replied. She glanced at Logan and the children. For a moment, he saw a softening of her gaze. Then it was gone, replaced by a familiar, steady look.
Abby shook her head. Suddenly, Kirsty came to Logan's buckboard. He thought she was about to say something to him. Instead, she grasped the side of the buckboard and looked up at Jack and Alice. "You promise to come see me, now. Won't you?" Kirsty's voice cracked with emotion. She glanced briefly at Logan. His heart skipped a beat.
Jack and Alice nodded in perfect unison.
"We'll come over when they're out of school," Logan said.
Kirsty nodded and stepped back from the buckboard. Right now, in some inexplicable way, Logan thought she looked vulnerable. It was as if she'd suddenly realized the great change which was about to come into her life. The children leaving seemed to have triggered uncontrollable feelings in Kirsty.
Before he had a chance to say anything, Lucas flicked the reins of his buckboard, sending it lurching forward.
Abby waved at Kirsty as the buckboard headed for the trail. "See you soon," Abby called out.
To Logan, Kirsty's smile seemed forced. He drew in a deep breath and nodded to Kirsty. She smiled back at him and the children. Then, Logan flicked the reins, sending the buckboard after Lucas and Abby.
As the buckboard picked up speed on the trail, it occurred to Logan that Kirsty had not said goodbye to him.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
A couple of hours after Abby had left, the Shaughnessy family arrived at Kirsty's homestead. They were on their way home after spending time in town after church. Bridget's husband, Calum looked after the three children outside while Kirsty took coffee with Bridget at the table inside the cabin.
"How are you?" Bridget asked, leaning her elbows on the table and examining Kirsty.
Kirsty sipped her coffee and shrugged. "Fine. I've been busy since Abby and Lucas left. That's the way it's going to be from now on." She ran her gaze around the interior of the cabin. "I've plenty to do if I'm going to keep this place going."
"That's one of the reasons I told Calum to stop on the way home. So I could talk to you about something."
For a moment, Kirsty assumed Bridget was going to ask about Logan. But, she didn't. Instead, Bridget revealed: "We saw Abby and Lucas coming back into town."
"Did you speak with them?"
Bridget shook her head. "We saw Logan." Kirsty felt her brows furrow. Clearly noticing that, Bridget added quickly: "And the children, too."
There was a long pause. Now Bridget was going to ask about Logan. Kirsty could feel it in her bones.
"He came out to help Abby take her things to her new home," Kirsty told Bridget. Saying those words caused a heavy weight to settle in her middle. Was she ever going to be able to talk about all of this without feeling this way? Would she ever be able to mention Logan without feeling a sinking sensation of regret?
Bridget said nothing. She merely nodded and then took another sip of coffee. Kirsty got the distinct impression Bridget was trying to avoid any further mention of Logan.
From outside, Kirsty heard the delighted laughter of the Shaughnessy children. The sound triggered another ache in her heart. Until Logan and the children had left earlier, Kirsty hadn't realized how much she'd become used to having Jack and Alice around. She knew they'd come to visit from time to time. But, their presence was never going to be permanent because she and Logan would never be able to work things out between them.
> Bridget examined Kirsty. "Are you sure you're feeling okay?"
Fussing with her hair, Kirsty sighed. "I guess I'm just a little tired. That's all."
Bridget reached her hand across the table and curled her fingers around Kirsty's wrist. "You know that if you need anything you can ask us. Calum and I are always happy to help."
"Thank you, Bridget. You've always been a great friend."
Bridget lifted a brow. "Just a friend? I'd have thought that, after all we've been through, you'd think of me as more than just a friend."
Kirsty rested her hand on Bridget's. "You know what I mean. Abby always said we'd never have been able to make the homestead work if it hadn't have been for the help you and Calum gave us. You made us feel a part of a community."
Bridget narrowed her eyes. "About that, Kirsty. I have something to tell you. I was speaking with Karl Olson and Gustav Schmitt this morning. They asked me to tell you that they're willing to help you while you get settled. Now that Abby has left to go live with Lucas."
"Help me?"
Bridget nodded. "Karl and Gustav have said they can come to your place and give you some help with some of the heavier tasks around the homestead."
"But I don't need their help," Kirsty replied. "I'm used to working this place. I know what needs to be done."
"And so do Karl and Gustav. They say it'll take you a while to adjust to working this place on your own."
Kirsty started to object again, but Bridget lifted a hand. "Let me finish, Kirsty MacAnliss," she stated firmly. Kirsty leaned back on her chair and waited for Bridget to continue. "I happen to agree with Karl and Gustav. And so does Calum. He'll be coming on the days when Karl and Gustav can't."
Kirsty widened her eyes at Bridget, but kept her lips firmly closed. She was prepared to let Bridget finish speaking, but she wasn't going to agree to accepting the help from the other homesteaders. Although the Olson and Schmitt homesteads were close, if both men came to her place, it would take them away from the work they had to do on their own spreads.
Bridget peered at Kirsty. "Now, we're only talking about a few weeks. Not forever. But the consensus amongst us homesteaders is that you need help. And that's what we're here for. To help each other."
The Cowboy’s Frontier Courtship Page 15